People management consists of a fair amount of mediation and diplomacy, and you can’t expect to get the hang of it right away. You’re in the middle of a lot now. Initiating difficult conversations, and then getting all the way through them, takes planning and practice (and sometimes even a breather). Holding tension takes restraint.

Amy B and Kelsey interview Amy G about the types of conflict that new managers should expect to handle, as well as options for responding. They talk through real experiences and common scenarios. Like that time Kelsey needed to tell a direct report they were falling short of her expectations (but didn’t end up saying anything). Or that time Amy G started reporting to a friend. They also give guidance for intervening or not when team members are arguing and for discreetly clueing your group in about the office politics going on.

Resources:

• HBR Guide to Dealing with Conflict, by Amy Gallo
• Getting Along: How to Work with Anyone (Even Difficult People), by Amy Gallo
• “4 Triggers Cause the Majority of Team Conflicts,” by Benjamin Laker and Vijay Pereira
• “You’re a Leader Now. Not Everyone is Going to Like You.” by Martin G. Moore
• “Navigating Conflict,” by Women at Work

Sign up for the Women at Work newsletter.

Email us: womenatwork@hbr.org