The Problem with People Pleasing

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People-pleasing doesn't actually please people but leads to obligations turning into burdens, making one not fulfill obligations well and resulting in weasily behavior. The urge to people please stems from childhood reasons, striving to meet all demands to avoid disappointing others. However, this behavior doesn't help anyone and leads to inefficiency in work and relationships. Learning to say 'no' and understanding that people-pleasing isn't effective on its own terms is crucial for personal growth and positive change. Choosing not to engage in activities one isn't genuinely interested in is better than attending and being miserable, as it is more beneficial for oneself and others involved.

Do you worry that you might be wasting your life? That you’re doing things that don’t feel important? Are you constantly anxious about your to-do list?

Is your mind blown that it’s 2024 already?!?

This week, I’ve enlisted the help of my friend Oliver Burkeman, author of the bestseller Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, to help us get a handle on using time wisely.

In this episode, we’re going to look at how our perception of time shapes our self-image, how it’s often advantageous to choose to be bad at something, why people-pleasing doesn’t actually please people, and a whole lot more.

Oliver Burkeman is a renowned journalist and author, known for his unique ability to seamlessly blend philosophy and psychology to bring a fresh and counterintuitive take to classic self-help subjects.