More on deferring to others

The speaker personally avoids deferring to waiters or waitresses when something is wrong with the food because of their upbringing, where the emphasis was on not wanting anyone to be upset with them. They mention that their tendency to defer to others is related to their desire for others not to be upset, a behavior learned from their mother. The speaker reflects on how this behavior used to stem from a need for love but has evolved into a fear of being hated, while acknowledging their progress in overcoming this mindset.