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Don’t Get Trapped! How to Beat the Narcissist At Their Own Game with Divorce Attorney Rebecca Zung | Part 1
Women of Impact
Negotiating with Narcissists
3-Point Summary for Beginners:
- Understand Their Tactics: Narcissists in negotiations aim to bait and trigger you. As Rebecca Zung says, "Negotiating with a narcissist is like getting arrested. Anything you can't, you say or do is going to be used against you."
- Maintain Emotional Composure: Stay emotionally sober. Your reactions fuel the narcissist's supply. Zung emphasizes, "And that is exactly what you have to do in, you know, to the nth degree in this kind of situation."
- Control Communication: Stick to one form of communication, preferably email, especially after leaving the relationship. This helps document interactions and avoid manipulation.
Key Takeaways:
- Every interaction is a potential trial exhibit. Be cautious in all communication.
- Narcissists seek "supply" – your emotional reactions. Don't give it to them.
- Create a plan with boundaries to regain control. Start small (e.g. "I'm not going to be spoken to in a way that's disrespectful.").
- Use one form of communication (email is recommended).
Practical Application: If confronted by a difficult person, immediately disengage and communicate only through email. Document everything and avoid emotional responses.
Summary: Negotiating with a narcissist requires careful planning and emotional control. Limit communication, preferably through email, and anticipate their manipulative tactics to protect yourself and maintain control. Establish boundaries to prevent being triggered or baited, starting with simple but firm statements.
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