What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood | Parenting Tips From Funny Moms

We’re in Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa Countdown! To keep you company while you slowly lose your mind, we’re re-running some of our favorite holiday episodes. This week we're revisiting our interview with Susan Katz Miller, author of THE INTERFAITH FAMILY JOURNAL.The holidays are always intense, and if your family is an intersection of multiple traditions, it can really ratchet up the pressure for perfection times two. Which is when it’s time to maintain perspective. As Susan explains:“I try to help people to understand that if they're having conflict often, it's not about religious difference. It's not about theology. It's not about whether there was an actual physical resurrection or not. It's usually about whether to put the fried onions on the green bean casserole or not.”In this episode we discuss -why every family is an interfaith family -how to reduce conflict about traditions with your spouse’s extended family -how to help your spouse when the hard feelings are on your family’s side -how to push back on the pressure to do “both” traditions perfectly -how to help your kids navigate being of a different faith than most people in your community -how to handle it when you’re observant but your spouse is not (or vice versa) -the resentment that can occur when the mom in a family is expected to carry the weight of passing on a religious tradition that's not even hersIt’s worth it to have the conversations, do the work, and delineate a “sacred circle” that works for your immediate family. As Susan explains, when you and your spouse come from different traditions, “you’re going to be doing the work anyhow.” But challenging your own mindset and context is also an incredible opportunity for growth– even if the way your spouse’s family opens their holiday gifts is completely and totally wrong. Here are links to some other writing on the topic we discuss in this episode:  -Pew Research Center: Why America’s ‘nones’ don’t identify with a religion -Stina Kielsmeier-Cook: Blessed Are the Nones: Mixed-Faith Marriage and My Search for Spiritual Community: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780830848270 -Buy THE INTERFAITH FAMILY JOURNAL: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781558968257We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What does it mean to be "touched out" as a mom? And once we know it's a thing—as anyone who's experienced it firsthand can attest—is there anything we can actually do about it? Amanda Montei, author of the popular Substack Mad Woman and the new book TOUCHED OUT, has studied the phenomenon of "maternal touch aversion" in both the literal and metaphorical senses. In this interview, Amanda, Margaret, and Amy discuss: -what being "touched out" really means—and why guilt and shame often accompanies it -the "very not normal" conditions of today's American parenting -how can we can begin to claim the space we want for our own selves, and model that for our children Here's where you can find Amanda: -https://www.amandamontei.com/ -Mad Woman Substack: https://amandamontei.substack.com/ -@amontei on IG -@amanda.montei on Facebook -Buy TOUCHED OUT: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9780807013274We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We all have things we dread about the holiday season, whether we celebrate Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, or a combination of the above. In this episode we are here to list all the "fresh hells" of this time of year, like: the terrors of Santa's lap the people who are impossible to buy for the grandparents who take all of our best gift ideas the approaching storm system as you check in for your flight to Nana's We do love the holidays, though. Really, we do. Remind us of that. This episode was inspired by this discussion on our Facebook page: What do you dread most about the holiday season? Join the fun: https://facebook.com/groups/whatfreshhellcastWe love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We’re in Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa Countdown! To keep you company while you slowly lose your mind, we’re re-running some of our favorite holiday episodes. This week we're revisiting "The Most Everything Time of the Year" and how the intensity really ratches up as soon as Thanksgiving is behind us.Are you juggling “dress as your favorite reindeer” day at preschool with frantic texts from your sister-in-law asking what your spouse wants for Christmas? Are you feeling like hiding under the covers instead of hitting the office holiday party? It’s the most everything time of the year, and women report the holidays as being far more stressful than men do. In this episode we discuss how to manage the holiday stress, how to accept the non-cozy feelings that may arise, and why it’s okay to dial back if you’re really not feeling the holiday spirit. Here are links to some of the writing on the topic that we discuss in this episode:  Pooja Lakshmin on Instagram @womensmentalhealthdoc Greenberg Quinlan Rosner Research: Holiday Stress Harvard Medical School: A holiday advisory for your emotions Cedars-Sinai Hospital: Depression and Anxiety Around the Holidays We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

How can we set reasonable limits for our kids without negotiating every single time they're tested? Erica Ladd and Kelsey Wharton, co-hosts of "The Girl Next Door Podcast," discuss tips for setting boundaries—and not just at the holidays, but all year round.Margaret, Kelsey, and Erica discuss: Why holidays are so boundary-crushing Everyday actions you can take to practice setting boundaries Why boundaries are not just for handling "crazymakers" Here's where you can find Kelsey and Erica: https://www.girlnextdoorpodcast.com/ @higirlsnextdoor on Instagram Listen to the GND episode "Ten Things We're NOT Doing This Christmas" We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Have you and your spouse slipped into "angry partners at the 24/7 daycare" mode since your baby was born? Here's why relationships change after kids, and some real solutions that can help us get through it.Amy and Margaret discuss: The number-one reason relationships change after a baby is born Helpful perspectives for maintaining sanity during early parenthood Small steps for building back connection with your partner Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Jessica Grose for the NYT: Fighting Constantly after Baby? Read This Doss BD, et al. The Effect of the Transition to Parenthood on Relationship Quality: An Eight-Year Prospective Study. Alex Vance for Verywell Family: 4 Ways To Focus On Your Relationship When the Kids Keep You Busy Jessica Grose for the NYT: Bickering More After Kids? Learn how to avoid the four horsemen of the relationship apocalypse. Christina Caron for the NYT: How to Reconnect with Your Partner After Kids Judd Apatow: "Who Slept Worse?" Check out all of the amazing shows in the Adalyst Media podcast network! If you love What Fresh Hell, you'll love our network of sister podcasts.We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We’re in Christmas/Hanukkah/Kwanzaa Countdown! To keep you company while you slowly lose your mind, we’re re-running some of our favorite holiday episodes. This one is about the "holiday creep" which, if you're reading this, has already begun..."Holiday Creep" is well on its way to being an entry in Merriam-Webster's dictionary. And with good reason. Amy and Margaret bemoan the fact the Christmas seems to start ever earlier, and weigh in on their strategies for managing the gift giving, decorating, and scheduling craziness at this time of year.Amy and Margaret discuss: Why Margaret is everyone's Christmas nightmare The 3 best rules for holiday gift giving When Christmas should REALLY start The solution to all the madness? Let the laws of holiday attrition work in your favor! If something falls off the list of priorities or is just no longer fun, take it off the calendar. Ask for a no-gift-exchange policy amongst family, friends, and coworkers, and find your "no" when it comes to holiday events, tasks, or experiences that are nothing but drudge for everyone!Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: Anne Helen Petersen, "A Theory of Sprawling Holidays" Mollie Wilson O'Reilly, "Waiting By the Jesse Tree" Eleanor Lees for Newsweek: "Why Does the Christmas Countdown Get Earlier Every Year?" We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What can we do when life seems to be falling down around our ears? Nicole Walters, author of the new book NOTHING IS MISSING: A MEMOIR OF LIVING BOLDLY, explains how to create our own fresh starts‒ and the joy that accompanies them.Nicole Walters is the host of "The Nicole Walters Podcast", a motivational speaker, and the mother of three adopted daughters.Nicole, Amy, and Margaret discuss: How to pour into your community with gentleness, grace and honesty How "fresh starts" can help you take control of your life  Why vulnerability is essential to connection Here's where you can find Nicole: https://nicolewalters.com @nicolewalters (IG) @MonetizeThyself (FB) Listen to the Nicole Walters podcast Buy NOTHING IS MISSING: https://bookshop.org/a/12099/9781668000953 We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We’re doing a Deep Dive into our best episodes around a single topic. Find the Spotify playlist for this “Deep Dive” here.This group of episodes is about parenting kids who don’t fit the mold. This week, we’re revisiting this episode from 2021. When a parent first hears about highly sensitive kids– or their opposite, sensory seekers– it can provide a profound moment of recognition, of connecting the dots for things about our kids that up until now have baffled us.We think understanding these sensory tendencies can help us parent our kids more effectively and compassionately. Not every kid who shows hyper- or hypo-sensitivity will go on to require occupational therapy, struggle in school, or anything else. But as childmind.org explains, ""These problems can be tough on kids, and get in the way of them functioning effectively, learning, and making friends."Every kid who displays these behaviors and preferences can benefit from a parent who understands and can therefore effectively support and address for the otherwise confusing behaviors that might ensue. We don't have to accommodate every dictate of an extremely picky eater, or messy playroom caused by a sensory seeker– but it's worth exploring, because it can really help us as parents to understand where these things might be coming from.Here are links to some of the resources mentioned in the episode: This image from Miracle Maker Mom Michael Rosenthal, PhD for the Child Mind Institute: Sensory Processing FAQ Amanda Morin for understood.org: Sensory seeking and sensory avoiding: What you need to know We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Sign up for "What Fresh Hell + " to get every one of our episodes ad-free, plus monthly bonus episodes. Go to whatfreshhell.supportingcast.fm to subscribe in two taps: $4.99 a month, or $39.99 a year. There are some things in life that sound more fun in the planning stage than they are in the execution, and those things are statistically proven to be done more frequently by parents. We asked our listeners to tell us their lists of things that should be fun, but aren't. As the record will show, our listeners are sadly, completely correct. Don't say you weren't warned.Here's the link to the episode of The Mom Hour episode a few of our listeners mentioned: We Hate Fun! We love the sponsors that make this show possible! You can always find all the special deals and codes for all our current sponsors on our website:https://www.whatfreshhellpodcast.com/p/promo-codes/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices