The Kids or Childfree Podcast

Your questions, answered! In this very first episode of my new Dear Former Fence-Sitter series, I sit down with former guest — mom, therapist, and former fence-sitter, Amanda E. White — to answer questions that include... How do I decide if I don't feel strongly about having kids one way or the other? If I'm scared of pregnancy and childbirth, what advice do you have for me? I'm a step-mom and struggling to figure out if I want kids of my own — what to do? How do I navigate my relationships with my mom friends as a childfree woman? What was beneficial in preparing yourself for parenthood, and that made you realize you could do it? As mentioned in the show: Listen to my original conversation with Amanda, where she shares her personal Kids or Childfree journey, here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4ir3CeSSRRLLh2PbVwQn1h Tune into my Between Friends conversation with Lauren Grant, here: www.kidsorchildfree.com/between-friends-event Find Amanda on Instagram: instagram.com/therapyforwomen Read Amanda's Fence Sitter Substack: amandaewhite.substack.com Listen to Amanda's Nuance Needed Podcast here: https://open.spotify.com/show/73G84FVO6k5lIAaRWhzlUi?si=39f1a6ffbd444408 Learning about Amanda's therapy practice, Therapy for Women Center: www.therapyforwomencenter.com About Amanda: Amanda E. White is a licensed therapist and the creator of the popular Instagram account @therapyforwomen. She writes a substack called Fence Sitter. She is the author of the book "Not Drinking Tonight" and its corresponding workbook. She is the founder of the group therapy practice, Therapy for Women Center, based in Philadelphia serving clients across the country. She has been featured in notable publications such as Forbes, Washington Post, Shape, Women's Health Magazine, and more. To learn more visit amandaewhite.com __ Get the details and attend one of our Kids or Childfree workshops here: www.kidsorchildfree.com/workshop Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@kidsorchildfree

In this episode, Keltie speaks with colleague, Sina Scheithauer, about her experience being on the fence about kids; how she made her childfree decision; and her work as a coach helping women with the "kid question" in Germany, and beyond. The two of them discuss: The complexities of the Kids or Childfree decision, including societal expectations surrounding motherhood. How Sina's personal experience grappling with this choice led her to support others in similar situations. The idealization of motherhood and the pressures women feel to conform to traditional roles, plus, the undervaluation of motherhood in society. The implications of freezing eggs as a means to buy time. Why living a life aligned with personal values is crucial. Ethical dilemmas related to climate change and the Kids or Childfree choice. About Sina Sina Scheithauer is a Podcaster & Coach for the „Kinderfrage" decision, living in Germany. As mentioned in the show Tune into Sina's Childfree Coffee Club Podcast (in German) here. Find Sina on Instagram at: www.instagram.com/sinascheithauer/ And on LinkedIn at: https://www.linkedin.com/in/sina-scheithauer-2635a42aa/ Check out Sina's free „Kinderfrage Entscheidungs Quiz" here: www.sina-scheithauer.de/quiz/ __ Details on my Clarity Booster offer, here: www.kidsorchildfree.com/claritybooster Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree

In this episode, Keltie Maguire speaks with one of her long-time friends, Carly Church, about life as a new mom, and how Carly made her decision to have a child. Keltie and Carly chat about: Carly's journey from single to meeting her partner, Mike; the experience of becoming a step-mom to Mike's two daughters — and how this relationship influenced Carly's own Kids or Childfree choice; and Carly's decision to become a mom. Carly's decision to freeze her eggs in her mid-30s — and why she's so happy she did. Her experiences as a step-parent and a first-time mom, including the importance of partner support, and the challenges of navigating relationships with stepkids. How Carly went from ambivalent about motherhood, to deciding to have a child — including the natural unfolding of her family life. The joys and challenges of motherhood and the impact on her identity and independence, thus far in her journey. About Carly: Carly Church has a habit of choosing to swim against the tide. Trained as a Professional Engineer and then moving on to work across the globe in the mining industry she has often found herself blazing a trail for women in the industry. A love for travel, both recreational and as part of long-term rotations on mining projects from Botswana to the rather more chilly, Northern Ontario, defined Carly's life in her 20s and 30s. Now a mother to James (0) and step-mother to Martha (11) and Edith (9), Carly is navigating how to balance the needs of her new family with the professional and personal pursuits which have always driven her. As mentioned in the show: Find Carly on Instagram: @cjcharlys __ Join the next round of our Kids or Childfree Group Program: www.kidsorchildfree.com/kids-or-childfree-program Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree

In this conversation, Keltie Maguire and philosopher, Ruth Chang, explore the complexities of hard choices, and in particular, the decision to have kids or remain childfree. They discuss... The idea of drifting into decisions — and why it's a valid decision tactic. That hard choices aren't about finding the right answer, but about understanding one's values and making a commitment to a chosen path. The nature of commitment and decision-making, and that commitment is not merely a rational choice based on pros and cons but an active agency that transforms our values and perspectives. Why commitment involves understanding who you can become, not just who you want to be. Plus, the importance of self-reflection in understanding who we can commit to becoming. The necessity of embracing uncertainty in the decision-making process. ...and lots more! About Ruth: Ruth Chang holds the Chair of Jurisprudence at the University of Oxford. Her expertise concerns philosophical questions relating to the nature of value, value conflict, decision-making, rationality, love, and human agency. She has shared her research in public venues including radio, television, and newspaper outlets such as National Public Radio, the BBC, National Geographic, and The New York Times. The institutions she lectured at or consulted for include Google, the CIA, the World Bank, the US Navy, the Bhutan government, Big Pharma, and many businesses and financial institutions. Her TED talk on hard choices has over nine million views. She is a member of the American Academy of Arts and Sciences. As mentioned in the show: Find Ruth online at ruthchang.net. Watch Ruth's TedTalk on hard choices: www.ted.com/talks/ruth_chang_how_to_make_hard_choices __ Join one of our upcoming Support Series sessions: Kids or Childfree Support Series: kidsorchildfree.com/kids-or-childfree-support-series Confidently Childfree Support Series: kidsorchildfree.com/confidently-childfree-support-series Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree

In this episode, Keltie speaks with artist and dad, Tyler Pentland, who shares his journey of becoming a father through surrogacy. Hear the two of them discuss: Why Tyler never considered kids or fatherhood until he met his husband, Jeff, in his late 30s. The decision to have a child via surrogacy, including both the emotional and logistical aspects of growing a family in this way. The importance of establishing a foundation of communication and trust in the relationship with one's surrogate. The joy of becoming a parent, plus the surprises and challenges along the way. About Tyler: In Tyler's words: "I'm Tyler, an art kid who grew up in the Okanagan and went to Art & Design school. I worked in corporate design & marketing for 17 years while maintaining a strong connection to my painting practice, showcasing my artwork on social media and gallery spaces. Fell in love in 2019, married my husband & now partner in parenting the miracle that is our incredible sunshine of a daughter, Emerald." As mentioned in the show: Find Tyler online at www.artbytylerpentland.com. And on Instagram: instagram.com/artbytylerpentland __ Join one of our upcoming Support Series sessions: Kids or Childfree Support Series: kidsorchildfree.com/kids-or-childfree-support-series Confidently Childfree Support Series: kidsorchildfree.com/confidently-childfree-support-series Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree

In this episode, Keltie Maguire speaks with Florence Wlodarski about Florence's Kids or Childfree journey — from ambivalence to IVF to embracing life without kids — plus, the inspiration behind PARALLEL, the social club Florence recently co-founded for those without kids. Keltie and Florence discuss: The societal expectations regarding motherhood and the pressures Florence faced to become a mom. Florence's decision to pursue IVF and the emotional complexities involved in that process. The experience of trying for a child, while still being on the fence about having one. Florence's reflections on identity and career that arose from her experiences. How Florence ultimately found peace and freedom in the decision not to have kids. The importance of community and connection, and how Florence and her husband co-founded Parallel Social Club, to support others in similar situations. About Florence: Florence Chung Wlodarski is the Co-Founder of PARALLEL, a new social club and community based out of Los Angeles, designed for those doing life without kids. In her professional life, she spent more than 20 years building community engagement strategies and partnerships between Fortune 500 corporations, nonprofit organizations and government agencies (with a speciality working with law enforcement) in the U.S. Now she's taking her experience and applying them to building a community for DINKs and SINKs. As mentioned in the show: Find Florence and Parallel Social Club online at parallelsocialclub.com. On Instagram: @parallelsocialclub __ Join the next round of our Kids or Childfree Group Program: www.kidsorchildfree.com/kids-or-childfree-program Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree

In this conversation, Keltie Maguire interviews filmmaker Sophia Seymour about her personal journey with egg freezing, and her documentary, Harvest, which Sophia created about the experience. You'll hear them discuss: The emotional and physical aspects of the egg-freezing process, and the decision-making involved. The societal pressures surrounding motherhood and fertility. Sophia's advice for anyone considering freezing their eggs. Why she wouldn't recommend egg-freezing as a means of getting clarity on the Kids or Childfree choice, despite having done so herself. Insights from her discussions with other women about the decision to have or not have kids. About Sophia: Sophia Seymour is a British award-winning writer/director living between London and Naples and writes regularly for The Guardian, Condè Nast and Time Out. She has a background in music management and highlights of her career so far include co-directing/producing Teranga - Life in the Waiting Room (Guardian Documentaries and BBC Africa Eye), appearing alongside Richard E Grant for his BBC4 Write Around the World series and working with Paolo Sorrentino for his Netflix documentary Through the Eyes of Sorrentino. She has worked as a producer on documentaries for the Guardian, Netflix, BBC2, BBC4 and graduated with a masters from The National Film and Television school in 2024. She is currently developing a slate of fiction and non-fiction films. As mentioned in the show: You can find Sophia online at: www.sophiaseymour.com Instagram: @sophia_seymour_says_ X: @SophiaSeymour2 Facebook: facebook.com/sophia.seymour Watch Sophia's film, Harvest, online at The Guardian. __ Join the March session of my Confidently Childfree Coaching Intensive: kidsorchildfree.com/confidently-childfree-support-series Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree

In this conversation, Keltie Maguire speaks with lifespan psychologist and post-doctoral researcher, Dr. Laura Buchinger, about her latest research on how parents versus childfree people fare in terms of well-being, mental health, and overall life satisfaction. Hear them discuss: What existing research tells us about how parents and non-parents fare at different stages of life and across various aspects of well-being. The gender differences in experiences of loneliness and social connections. Whether or not childfree people are lonelier than parents. How societal expectations about parenthood influence life decisions and experiences. How cultural perspectives that shape attitudes toward having children, and the shifting views of younger generations regarding the childfree choice. About Laura: Laura Buchinger is a lifespan psychologist exploring how personality, motivation, health, and well-being evolve throughout life. After earning an undergraduate degree from Chemnitz University of Technology in 2013, she completed a master's degree in Clinical Psychology at Freie Universität Berlin in 2016. Laura began her career as an organizational psychologist and consultant, focusing on occupational health and safety, before transitioning back to academia just before the pandemic. In 2023, she earned a PhD in Psychology from Freie Universität Berlin with a thesis titled "Life Goals Across Adulthood and Old Age: Associations With Personality and Well-Being." Laura is now a post-doctoral researcher in developmental psychology at Humboldt-Universität zu Berlin. Her research focuses on interindividual differences in personality traits, life goals, and values, and their effects on health and well-being across the lifespan As mentioned in the show: Find Laura on... Blue Sky at: @lbuchinger.bsky.social LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/laura-buchinger-b06359161/ You can connect with her via email at: laura.buchinger@hu-berlin.de The studies mentioned in our conversation can be found below: Buchinger, L., Richter, D., & Heckhausen, J. (2022). The Development of Life Goals Across the Adult Life Span. The Journals of Gerontology: Series B, 77(5), 905–915. https://doi.org/10.1093/geronb/gbab154 Buchinger, L., Wahring, I. V., Ram, N., Hoppmann, C., Heckhausen, J., & Gerstorf, D. (2024). Kids or no Kids? Life Goals in one's 20s Predict Midlife Trajectories of Well-Being. Psychology and Aging, 39(8), 897–914. https://doi.org/10.1037/pag0000862 Bauer, G., Brandt, M. & Kneip, T. The Role of Parenthood for Life Satisfaction of Older Women and Men in Europe. J Happiness Stud 24, 275–307 (2023). https://doi.org/10.1007/s10902-022-00600-8 Graham, M. (2015). Is being childless detrimental to a woman's health and well-being across her life course?. Women's health issues, 25(2), 176-184. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.whi.2014.12.002 Penning, M. J., Wu, Z., & Hou, F. (2024). Childlessness and social and emotional loneliness in middle and later life. Ageing & Society, 44(7), 1551-1578. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0144686X22000824 Krämer, M. D., Van Scheppingen, M. A., Chopik, W. J., & Richter, D. (2023). The transition to grandparenthood: No consistent evidence for change in the Big Five personality traits and life satisfaction. European Journal of Personality, 37(5), 560–586. https://doi.org/10.1177/08902070221118443 Stahnke, B., Cooley, M. E., & Blackstone, A. (2023). A Systematic Review of Life Satisfaction Experiences Among Childfree Adults. The Family Journal, 31(1), 60–68. https://doi.org/10.1177/10664807221104795 __ Check out our brand-new Confident Childfree Support Series: kidsorchildfree.com/confidently-childfree-support-series Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree

In this solo episode, host Keltie Maguire answers a listener question about how life looks a few years beyond making her Kids or Childfree choice. Rather than speaking solely from the perspective of being childfree, Keltie shares five key insights that can be applied to any choice you ultimately make. You'll hear about: Why making a decision means you can finally get on with your life. The idea that confidence comes after a choice, not before. Why practicing presence and peace with what is — rather than what if — is key. What it means to stay in your own lane — and the benefits of doing so. Why it's important to recognize that difficult emotions aren't the same thing as having made the wrong choice. As mentioned on the show: Check out my former podcast, The Clarity Podcast. Want to submit a question for the upcoming "Dear Former Fencesitter" episode? You can email it to hello@keltiemaguire.com. ____ Check out our brand-new Kids or Childfree Support Series: kidsorchildfree.com/kids-or-childfree-support-series Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree

In this conversation, Keltie Maguire speaks with therapist, author, and podcast host, Vasavi Kumar. You'll hear about: Vasavi's choice to be childfree, and why she says it's the best decision she's ever made. How to navigate the external influences that are keeping you stuck in your Kids or Childfree choice. How you can tap into and access your authentic voice — and what it's telling you about whether or not you want kids. Why you can't force yourself to want something you don't want. The impact of childhood experiences on adult choices, including how generational trauma can shape the decision to have or not have kids. The importance of self-reflection through practices like mirror work and "saying it out loud", plus, the need for self-compassion in decision-making. How mental health challenges — including Vasavi's bipolar diagnosis — can significantly influence the Kids or Childfree choice. Living a fulfilling and meaningful life without children. As mentioned on the show Find Vasavi online at vasavikumar.com Follow her online at @mynameisvasavi Purchase Vasavi's book, Say It Out Loud, here: https://vasavikumar.com/orderthebook Get Vasavi's free Mirror Work Prompts here: https://vasavi.myflodesk.com/mirror Book an intro call with Vasavi at: https://calendly.com/vasavi/chat-with-vasavi About Vasavi Vasavi Kumar is a therapist, author, and podcast host passionate about empowering individuals to embrace their authentic selves. Living with Bipolar Disorder, Vasavi brings a unique perspective to conversations around mental health, self-talk, and personal growth. As the author of Say It Out Loud and host of the SAY IT OUT LOUD podcast, she inspires audiences to break free from societal expectations and live in alignment with their truth. Through coaching, writing, and speaking, Vasavi helps people build confidence, navigate life's complexities, and create meaningful change. __ Check out our brand-new Kids or Childfree Support Series: kidsorchildfree.com/kids-or-childfree-support-series Check out our free resources here, or at kidsorchildfree.com/free-resources And don't forget to subscribe, rate, and review The Kids or Childfree Podcast if you love what you're hearing! You can leave a rating and review on Apple Podcasts, or a rating on Spotify. Find us online at www.kidsorchildfree.com. Instagram: www.instagram.com/kidsorchildfree