Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Friendship Advice for Kids (K-8)

Eileen Kennedy-Moore, PhD, author, psychologist, focusing on children's feelings, children's friendships, parenting, mental health.
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Jan 11, 2025 • 5min

How to know if you can trust a friend (Sally, Age 14)

Ep. 86 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: What makes a trustworthy friend?Sally wants to know how she can tell if a friend is trustworthy.FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- Have you ever thought that a friend betrayed your trust? What happened? How did you handle it?- What are some things you do to show your friends that they can trust you?- Why do you think kids sometimes blab their friend’s secrets? - What should you do if you accidentally tell another kid something that your friend wanted to keep private?- Dr. Friendtastic said, “It takes courage to trust someone, especially if you’ve been burned before.” Why is it sometimes hard to trust people? Why is trusting people important for building close friendships*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 84 - Eloise, age 8: Fights with close friends https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/eloise-age-8-fights-with-close-friendsEp. 79 - Mar, age 11: Is your friend a fake friend?https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep79-mar-age-11-is-your-friend-a-fake-friendEp. 81 - Nicoletta, age 14: Friend's secret could harm https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep81-nicoletta-age-14-friends-secret-could-harm Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Dec 21, 2024 • 6min

Fitting in versus being true to yourself (Nev, Age 11)

Ep. 85  - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: No friend group has more power than you.  Nev wonders what her mom means when she says, "No friend group has more power than you."FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- Would you rather hang out with just one friend or a group of friends? Why? - What are some ways that friend groups might influence you?- Why is it sometimes hard for kids to stand up for what they want in a friendship group? (Hint: What might they be afraid could happen?)- Dr. Friendtastic says that hiding how you feel can be unfair to you and to your friends. How is it unfair to you? How is it unfair to your friends?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 76 - Ayana, age 10: Friends ditch herhttps://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep76-anaya-age-10-friends-ditch-herEp. 64 - Blake, age 13: Make friends with different interestshttps://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep64-blakeEp. 48 - Lily, age 6: New friend claims to be best friendhttps://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/lily-age-6-new-friend-claims-to-be-best-friend Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Dec 14, 2024 • 5min

Torn between two friends who don’t like each other (Jennifer, Age 10)

Ep. 84 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Dealing with a friendship tug-of-war.Jennifer wants to know what to do when two friends who don't like each other each want to be her partner.FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- A friendship tug-of-war happens when two friends each try to pull a friend in the middle to their side. How do you think the friends on each end feel? (Hint: Why are they pulling?) How do you think the friend in the middle feels?- If you were in Jennifer’s situation, and two friends who didn’t like each other both wanted to partner with you, would you choose to work with one, work with both, or work with neither? Why would you choose that option?- Do you prefer to pick your own partner for school projects or have the teacher assign partners? Why?- What do you think are the qualities of a good work partner? Do you believe that you are a good work partner? Why or why not?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 13 - Mara, age 9: Friend doesn't want her to have other friends https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-13-maraEp. 17 - Sophie, age 10: Balancing a best friend and another friend https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-16-sophieEp. 47 - Brayden, age 9: Why are friends important? https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/brayden-age-9-why-are-friends-important Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Nov 23, 2024 • 4min

Fights with close friends (Eloise, Age 8)

Ep. 83 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: How to make conflict less frequent and less painful.Eloise wonders why best friends have bad fights.FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- Have you ever had a big argument with a close friend? What happened?- What do you think are some common topics friends argue about?- What does it mean to “assume good intentions”? Why is this an important thing to do in a friendship?- Why do you think kids sometime have trouble asking friends for what they want or need?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 1 - Naomi, age 7: Friendship ends over small thing https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-1Ep. 53 - Lillian, age 11: How to stay calm when someone is bragging https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/lillian-age-11-how-to-stay-calm-whenEp. 73 - J.J., age 11: Best friend suddenly stops playing with him https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep73-jj-age-11-best-friend-stops-playing-with-him Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Nov 16, 2024 • 5min

Expand friend group without hurting best friend (Paa, Age 12)

Ep. 82 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: How to make new friends and keep the old. Paa wants to expand her friend group but how can she do that without hurting her best friend?FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- Have you ever tried to expand your friend group? What did you do? How did it work?- Dr. Friendtastic said that the easiest and kindest way Paa could expand her friend group is to invite her current best friend to be part of that goal. Why do you think that might be a good option?- Why is inviting someone to do something fun with you outside of where you normally see them a good way to deepen a friendship? (Hint: What does that show them about how you feel about them?) - What are some ways you could show a friend that they matter to you?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 4 - Thomas, Age 13: One friend feels left out https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-episode-71f Ep. 13 - Mara, Age 9: Friend doesn't want her to have other friends https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-13-mara Ep. 67 - Paul, Age 12: Choosing good friends https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/paul-age-12-choosing-friends-who Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Nov 9, 2024 • 4min

Friend’s secret could harm them (Nicoletta, Age 14)

Ep. 81 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Knowing when to tell an adult Nicoletta is worried about what to do when a friend begs her to keep a secret that could harm the friend.FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- Tattling means trying to get someone in trouble. Telling means talking to an adult to prevent someone from being hurt or something from being broken. If Nicoletta decides to tell an adult about her friend’s secret, is that tattling or telling? Why?- If you were in a situation like Nicoletta’s, who are the trusted adults in your life that you could go to for help?- Why do kids sometimes NOT want to go to an adult when they’re having a serious problem? (Hint: Why do you imagine Nicoletta’s friend begged her not to tell her secret to anyone?)- What could Nicoletta say to her friend if the friend gets mad at her for telling?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 1 - Naomi, Age 7: Friendship ends over small thing https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-1Ep. 6 - Jayden, Age 9: Wondering why kids bully https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep6-why-kids-bullyEp. 78 - How to confront a friend https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep78-how-to-confront-a-friend Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Nov 2, 2024 • 6min

Dealing with a manipulative friend (Laina, Age 11)

Ep. 80 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Dealing with a manipulative friendLaina wonders how to deal with a manipulative friend. But what does that even mean?FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- Have you ever had a friend who tried to get you to do something you didn’t want to do? What did the friend do? How did you handle it?- What’s the difference between trying to manipulate someone and trying to influence them?- Why is it NOT a good idea to tell someone that they’re a bad person? What could you do instead?- Why is it useful to try to imagine someone else’s perspective, even (or especially) if you’re mad at them?- Dr. Friendtastic says, “Your friend can’t actually MAKE you do anything you don’t want to do.” What does that mean?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 65 - Bridget, Age 14: Handling a controlling friend https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep65-bridget-age-14 Ep. 10 - Isaac, Age 7.5: Friend is disrespectful https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-10-isaac Ep. 15 - Evie, Age 9: What is a close friend? https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-15-evie Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Oct 26, 2024 • 5min

Is your friend a fake friend? (Mar, Age 11)

Ep. 79 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Is your friend a fake friend?Mar wants to know how to recognize a fake friend.FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- How would you define “being fake”? Why do you think kids sometimes act in ways that don’t match what they really think or feel?- Why do kids sometimes act differently in different situations or with different people? Why is this NOT the same as being fake?- Dr. Friendtastic says, “Every friendship, if it lasts long enough, is going to hit a rough spot.” What do you think are some good ways to move past a friendship rough spot?- Have you ever had an unreliable friend–someone you felt you couldn’t count on? How did you handle this?- What does it mean to trust a friend? Can you trust a friend who makes a mistake and says or does something unkind? Why or why not?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 24 - Olivia, Age 13: Some friendships have limits https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-24-olivia Ep. 26 - Sam, Age 13: Joining a new group of friends https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep-16-sam Ep. 34 - Chloe, Age 9: Upset by name-calling https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/chloe-age-9-upset-by-name-calling Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Oct 19, 2024 • 6min

How to Confront a Friend

Ep. 78 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: How to confront a friend.What can you say when a friend does something that upsets you? How do you get your message across without wrecking the friendship?FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus articles for parents.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- What does it mean to confront a friend about a problem? Have you ever had to do that? What happened?- How do you decide when to confront a friend about a problem and when to let it go? - Why do you think kids are sometimes afraid to confront a friend about a problem?- Why are refusing to talk to a friend and telling everyone except your friend what your friend did wrong NOT helpful strategies for solving a problem with a friend? What could you do instead?- Dr. Friendtastic said, “A good confrontation is not about…proving you’re good and they’re bad! It’s about building and repairing a friendship.” What does that mean?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep. 73 - J.J., Age 11: Best friend suddenly stops playing with him https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep73-jj-age-11-best-friend-stops-playing-with-him Ep. 43 - Beatrix, Age 8: Friend cuts her hair! https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/beatrix-age-8-friend-cuts-her-hair Ep. 65 - Bridget, Age 14: Handling a controlling friend https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-ep65-bridget-age-14 Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Oct 12, 2024 • 5min

Friend is nicer to someone else (Maya, Age 8)

Ep. 77 - Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: A friend is not a birthday cake!Maya wonders what to do when she notices her friend being nicer to someone else than to her. Scroll down for discussion questions.FREE quiz: Is Your Child a Good Friend? https://eileenkennedymoore.ck.page/e37dcc098fWould YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast?SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://DrFriendtastic.com/submit (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For an easy-to-read TRANSCRIPT, go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.com.Subscribe to my NEWSLETTER, https://DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus online workshop announcements.*** DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:- Dr. Friendtastic says, “A friend is not a birthday cake!” What does she mean by that? (Hint: Think about the difference between dividing a cake versus sharing a friend.)- Have you ever felt jealous of a friend’s other friend? How did you handle that?- What are some things you do to strengthen your friendships? - Why does Dr. Friendtastic say, “It’s not smart to have a ‘best friends or nothing’ attitude”? How could that attitude hurt you?*** You might also like these podcast episodes:Ep 71 – Tali, Age 11 Is she a friend or not? https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/ep71-tali-age-11-is-she-a-friend-or-not Ep. 4 - Thomas, Age 13: One friend feels left out https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/kids-ask-dr-friendtastic-episode-71f Ep. 51 – Saoirse, Age 8: Mean comment said behind her back https://drfriendtastic.substack.com/p/saoirse-age-8-mean-comment-said-behind Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe

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