Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Friendship Advice for Kids (K-8)

Eileen Kennedy-Moore, PhD, author, psychologist, focusing on children's feelings, children's friendships, parenting, mental health.
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May 13, 2023 • 6min

Balancing a best friend and another friend (Sophie, Age 10)

Ep. 17 – Sophie, Age 10: Balancing a best friend and another friend | Appreciating different flavors of friendsSophie is deciding whether to sit on the bus with her close friend or a new friend. Scroll down for discussion questions, a transcript, and how to submit your child's question.Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- Have you ever felt torn between two friends? How did you handle it? What would you do in Sophie’s situation?- Why is it a good idea to have more than one friend?- How does Dr. Friendtastic suggest that you can “soften a no”? Why might you want to do that? (Hink: How might the other person feel?)- Have you ever worried about losing a friend if you spent time apart? What does it mean to “Trust that your friendship is strong enough to handle a bit of time apart”? Why is this important for a friendship?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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May 6, 2023 • 5min

Joining a new group of friends (Sam, Age 13)

Ep. 16 – Sam, Age 13: Joining a new group of friends | Understanding the difference between fitting in and belongingSam wants to know how he can tell if he’s become friends with a new group.Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- What are some ways that friendship groups can be more complicated than individual friendships?- Have you ever tried to change friendship groups? Why did you want to make the change? How did it go?- Why does Dr. Friendtastic recommend belonging to more than one friendship group?- Why do you think kids sometimes try to hide or change something about themselves to fit in? How is that different from belonging?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Apr 29, 2023 • 4min

What is a close friend? (Evie, Age 9)

Ep. 15 – Evie, Age 9: What is a close friend? | Valuing close friends and other friendsEvie wonders how to tell if she has a close friend.Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- Why do you think it’s important to enjoy casual friends as well as close friends?- Can you think of someone who is not a close friend but still makes your life more enjoyable? Who is that, and how do they add to your life?- Can you think of someone who started out as a casual friend and became a close friend of yours over time? How did that happen? - How about the reverse? Have you ever known someone who used to be a close friend of yours, and then you grew apart? What happened?- What do you think Dr. Friendtastic meant when she said, “The best way to get closeness is to give it”?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Apr 22, 2023 • 6min

Feels guilty, wants to make up with a friend (Rowan, Age 12)

Ep. 14 – Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: How to apologize wellRowan feels guilty about doing something mean to his friend. What can he do to repair the friendship?Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- Have you ever felt guilty about something you did (or didn’t do) to a friend? How did you handle that? Were you able to make up with the friend?- Why do you think some kids have a hard time apologizing? How hard or easy is it for you to apologize?- Think about a time that someone apologized to you. Do you think they were genuinely sorry? How could you tell?- Dr. Friendtastic says that guilt can be a useful emotion, even though it’s uncomfortable. Do you agree? Why or why not?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Apr 15, 2023 • 5min

Friend doesn’t want her to have other friends (Mara, Age 9)

Ep. 13 – Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Dealing with an Octopus FriendMara wonders how to handle a friend who wants to keep her all to herself.Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- Have you ever had an Octopus friend, someone who wanted to keep you all to themselves? How did you handle it?- Why do you think trying to hold on tightly to a friend because you’re scared of losing them makes it more likely that you’ll lose them?- Have you ever had a friendship where you liked the other person more than they liked you? How did you feel? What did you do?- Having more than one friend can be tricky. How do you decide which friend(s) to play with and when?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Apr 1, 2023 • 5min

Kid bullies him at recess (Adrian, Age 8)

Ep. 12 – Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Knowing when to get adult helpAdrian wonders what to do when a kid picks on him every day at recess.Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT and go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- What is the difference between bullying and ordinary meanness? Why does this matter? How would you respond to these situations differently?- If someone is not listening when you ask them to stop, why does it make sense to stop trying to make them change what they’re doing and instead focus on taking care of yourself?- How could standing near an adult or staying near friends make you less likely to get picked on?- What do you think is likely to happen if you try to get even with someone who was mean to you?- Why do you think some kids are mean to other kids?- Have you ever been bullied?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Mar 25, 2023 • 5min

Kids say mean things about a friend’s skin color (Violet, age 8)

Ep. 11 – Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Speaking up for a friendViolet wonders how to stand up for her friend when other friends make racist comments.Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- Why do you think it’s important to speak up if you hear someone say something mean about your friend? What would you do if you heard someone say something mean about a kid you don’t know well? What would you do if the mean comments were about a kid you know but don’t like?- What, if anything, have you learned at school about race and racism? What have you learned about those topics from adult family members?- Do you think it matters whether someone said a racist comment on purpose, trying to be hurtful, versus saying it without realizing the comment is hurtful? Why or why not?- How do you know when it’s important to talk to an adult about mean or racist comments versus handling the situation yourself?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Mar 18, 2023 • 5min

Friend is disrespectful (Isaac, age 7.5)

Ep. 10, Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: Speaking up for yourself in kind waysIsaac wonders what to do when another kid treats him and his toys in disrespectful ways. Does that mean the friendship is over?Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- Everyone makes mistakes sometimes. How do you know when your friend’s mistake is something you need to forgive or work through and when it means the end of your friendship?- Think of a time when you needed to explain to a friend what you were thinking or feeling. What did you say? How did the friend react? - Why are “I” statements a powerful way to deal with friendship problems? What makes them more effective than a “You” statement? (Hint: How do you think a friend would respond if you talked about a problem by saying “I want…” versus “You always…”?)- Why do you think it’s sometimes hard for kids to tell friends about what they think, feel, or want? How could NOT telling friends about your thoughts and feelings hurt a friendship? - Can you think of a situation when NOT telling a friend what you think or feel might be the kind thing to do? For example, if you don’t like your friend’s haircut or outfit, do you need to tell your friend or is it better to keep that opinion to yourself? Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Mar 11, 2023 • 5min

Told she can't play (Ava, age 9)

Ep 9 – Ava, age 9: Friendly actions in public versus private settings.Ava has two friends who want to play only with each other. What should she do?Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- Why do you think Ava’s friends wanted to play only with each other? Why does Dr. Friendtastic think it matters whether they are in a private or public setting?- Have you ever had someone tell you that you couldn’t play? What did you do?- What do you think of the rule: “You can’t say anyone can’t play”? Do you think it would help kids be kinder and include others? Why or why not?- Are there any situations where you think it’s okay not to include someone? What would you do if a kid was being mean or trying to wreck your game?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe
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Mar 4, 2023 • 5min

Excluded by friends (Blake, age 11)

Episode 8 – Kids Ask Dr. Friendtastic: On the edge of a friendship group?Blake’s question is about what to do when friends get together without him. This event could mean nothing at all, or it could be a sign of problems in his friendships.Would YOUR KID like to be featured on the podcast? SUBMIT A QUESTION TO DR. FRIENDTASTIC at https://drfriendtastic.com/submit/ (Obviously, this is not psychotherapy, and it’s not for emergency situations.)For a TRANSCRIPT go to: https://DrFriendtastic.com/podcast/DISCUSSION QUESTIONS- Have you ever felt left out of your group of friends? What happened? How did you handle it?- What are some unhurtful reasons why kids might get together with some of their friends in a group but not all of them?- Excluding just one kid from a group get-together is likely to hurt that kid’s feelings. If you like that kid, what are some ways you could help that kid feel less hurt? If you don’t like that kid, what are some kinder ways to handle that?- Why do you think it’s not a good idea to yell at your friends if they get together without you?- What are some fun ideas of things you could invite a group of friends to do with you?Books mentioned in the podcast:Growing Friendships: A Kids' Guide to making and Keeping Friends https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-friendships/Growing Feelings: A Kids' Guide to Dealing with Emotions about Friends and Other Kids https://eileenkennedymoore.com/child-development-books/growing-feelings/Like the podcast? Check out my books and webinars at https://EileenKennedyMoore.comSubscribe to my NEWSLETTER, DrFriendtastic.substack.com, to get podcast episodes sent to your email plus posts for parents.Connect with me on social media for more useful and entertaining content for parents:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drfriendtastic/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/EileenKennedyMooreTikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@drfriendtastic Get full access to Dr. Friendtastic for Parents at drfriendtastic.substack.com/subscribe

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