On the eve of the first big relaxation of lockdown rules, the podcast team asks if it's safe to take a seat on the train or in the bar. Police close an abattoir in Gelderland following a coronavirus outbreak, shining a spotlight on conditions for migrant workers. The Netherlands continues to aggravate its EU partners over financial support for corona-hit countries, while at home there are more unsavoury twists in the tax office fraud scandal. And we bring you up to date on a spate of new political appointments as 'Mister Stikstof' Johan Remkes takes his last bow.

The nation took its first tentative steps into the 1.5-metre society this week. Children started going back to school, hairdressers started hacking though their waiting lists and the American ambassador resumed his love affair with fake news. In parliament, defence minister Ank Bijleveld narrowly survived her second motion of no confidence over the deaths of civilians in an air strike in Iraq. We also report on the freak incident that cost five experienced surfers their lives off the coast at Scheveningen and why the football season went into extra time in the courtroom.

As the nation prepares to emerge from lockdown, hand stitched face masks at the ready, we examine the government's plans in detail. Libraries, acupuncturists, sex clubs and campsite toilets all featured in Mark Rutte's schedule as Dutch society slowly returns to normal. Coronavirus also gave this year's ceremonies to commemorate the end of the war an even more sombre atmosphere than usual. While the humans are staying home, the animals have been getting busy, increasing the population of the Netherlands' zoos by two. In the absence of regular politics, fringe parties Denk and 50Plus maintained interest by hitting the self-destruct button simultaneously. And don't miss this week's ophef featuring a murdered politician, a discredited psychic and an invisible MP discussing 5G and climate change.

The podcast team overcomes 'coronamoeheid' and the horror of 'coronakapsels' to bring you the latest news on the lockdown as well as a few of the 700 new Dutch words that the epidemic has generated. Ministers come under more pressure over face masks, the economic outlook goes from terrible to abysmal and researchers warn of a hidden danger for intensive care patients. Mink farms are cordoned off as evidence emerges that some animals can transmit the virus, while the football season looks like going to extra time in the courtroom. We also consider a potential breakthrough in the MH17 investigation and the implications of Forum voor Democratie getting its first taste of power in Noord-Brabant.

As the schools prepare to reopen in May, we examine the government's strategy to release the lockdown. What's the impact on regular healthcare? Is it all over for the football season? How did KLM manage to stir up outrage about executive bonuses twice in a week? And most importantly of all, when can we stop cutting our own hair? In other news, there are fresh disclosures about the bombing raid in Iraq in 2015 and a landmark court decision on euthanasia. Plus: why hay fever sufferers need to be on their guard against German pollen.

In this week's coronavirus news, demand on intensive care beds appears to be easing off but there is growing concern about the spike in deaths in nursing homes. There's also news of research into what proportion of people may have developed immunity, a rash of scams involving face masks and why idiots are burning down phone masts. As the sense of apocalyptic doom intensifies, a church's Easter light show sparks panic in Brabant. Sporting events attempt to move indoors – with mixed results – and a grandmother gets more than she bargained for when she opens up a four-year-old second-hand jigsaw puzzle.

Our socially distancing podcast team updates you on the state of the lockdown as the first signs emerge of the outbreak being brought under control. What do privacy campaigners have to say about the government's plan to use tracker apps? Why is Wopke Hoekstra persona non grata in Italy? And will the football season end sooner than the row about whether to end the football season? Away from the corona doom and gloom, we've got news of a bionic bird and how MPs short-circuited Utrecht's plan to switch off the gas supply.

We bring you up to date with the latest news on how the Dutch are dealing with the coronavirus pandemic. Find out how the government is planning to ramp up the number of intensive care beds, how an ambulance got held up for 20 minutes in Belgium and why finance minister Wopke Hoekstra had to eat a large slice of humble pie. The competition for 'most awkward bodyswerve of the year' award has two strong entries this week from Mark Rutte and Hugo de Jonge. And art thieves spoiled Van Gogh's birthday by helping themselves to one of his paintings during the corona shutdown.

Our latest quarantined podcast brings you news of the latest coronavirus figures, the government's strict new social distancing rules and the efforts to step up testing. The KNVB still hopes to finish the football season and the MH17 trial is postponed to June for non-corona reasons. The virus is separating not just friends and families, but the men's and women's clothing racks in a shop on the Belgian border. And while the first corona babies may be a few months away, the storks are already playing havoc with the train services in Drenthe. (PS: want to hear us in better quality sound? Your Patreon donation can help your wish come true.)

In the first virtual edition of the DutchNews podcast this week brings you all the latest news on the shutdown, with some audio issues as we get used to our new working conditions. How are families managing home schooling? What help is the government giving to people and businesses? Can you still go outside? And should we quarantine Hugo de Jonge's shoes? We also look at the community initiatives that have sprung up to help people cope and the medical advances that might hold the key to controlling corona. And did we witness Mark Rutte's Gettysburg moment during a visit to Albert Heijn?