DutchNews Podcast

Let's face it, most reviews of 2020 are going to be about as appealing as eating a burned kaassoufflé at an André Hazes concert in Zoetermeer. So why not escape the pandemic and binfire of democracy, pour yourself a glass of droplikeur and enjoy our Ophef of the Year Awards. From king Willem-Alexander being framed by a window cleaner to the alternative news station's interview with the ghost of Pim Fortuyn, we've got all the news it was fit to get fleetingly enraged about. There's also Thierry Baudet's tweet about Moroccan train inspectors, musical seat-stealing in the Tweede Kamer and Mark Rutte's viral handshake with Jaap van Dissel. We've posted an excerpt of the full episode publicly, but if you want hear the full ophef list first, help keep the podcast going by supporting us on Patreon. Want to support the DutchNews podcast and keep our stocks of dog food and stroopwafels healthy? Click here to become a Patreon backer. www.patreon.com/DutchNewsNL

Our special Ask Me Anything was recorded in the summer in the innocent, carefree days before the second wave. We tackled your questions on why the Dutch were being so mean to the Italians, the price of Trouby's dog food and Belgian architecture. We also try to rank flavours of drop and Dutch ice-cream flavours, which makes us wish coronavirus would take away our sense of taste. And you can enjoy Paul's reflections on going to see the worst Dutch movie ever made.

We've got a Christmas games and puzzles edition of the podcast to wrap up the year. Hugo de Jonge leaves the rest of the CDA playing Exploding Kittens for a new leader following his unexpected departure. The government continues to play whack-a-mole with the coronavirus pandemic as infections increase. The ChristenUnie tries a new opening gambit by including contraceptives in the basic healthcare package. And there's the riddle of the metal monolith that materialised from nowhere in Friesland.

We throw the spotlight on the bureaucratic vices of incompetence and intransigence in this week's podcast. We take an in-depth look at the parliamentary inquiry into the child benefits system, which left thousands of families financially and emotionally ruined when they were wrongly tagged as fraudsters. There's a whole lot of voting going on as Forum voor Democratie hold a referendum on Thierry Baudet's leadership and the annual celebration of shopping-mall wallpaper that is the Top 2000 begins. And we ask if Dick Lawyer is really retiring to spend more time with his chickens and who will win the tug-of-love contest for the Netherlands' last surviving circus elephant.

It began in the spring, died away during the summer and came back with a roar in the autumn. No, not coronavirus, but the disintegration of right-wing populist party Forum voor Democratie, which burst apart this week in a shower of resignations, poison-pen letters and video tirades, with a backing track of 80s disco. We do our best to make sense of it all and pick out the highlights, as well as ask what happens to the FVD vote. We also update you on more serious political matters, such as the ongoing global pandemic and the inquiry into the tax office scandal. There's more ophef as the most famous circus act in the Netherlands encounter their arch-nemesis in court. And we ask who's been out rustling steel horses at midnight in Katwijk.

Sinterklaas is working from home, the New Year fireworks have gone out with a whimper and the Elfstedentocht has been abandoned even earlier than usual as coronavirus kills off Dutch seasonal joy. On the positive side, there's a vaccine and the League Against Swearing have published a handy guide to which children's books to buy this Christmas. Coronavirus is also blamed for the government's failure to process thousands of asylum applications in time. And we bring you the story of how a Swedish insomniac helped solve a 25-year-old mystery on the island of Texel.

A good news week as coronavirus infections start coming down across the kingdom – except in Curaçao, where Dutch tourists are touching down with their fake test certificates and piling into the beach bars. An awkward week for education minister Arie Slob, who is forced to switch sides over anti-gay school charters in the Bible Belt. Amsterdam city council has some distasteful suggestions for celebrating Sint-Maarten, while police in Limburg are surprised to find a cellar that hasn't been converted into a drugs lab.

Disaster was averted this week in 'city of bridges' Spijkenisse when a metro train came to rest atop a sculpture. The government imposed a two-week 'hard lockdown' to try to stop the coronavirus second wave turning into a healthcare disaster. And a disastrous performance by a Rotterdam academic on Thierry Baudet's TV channel went viral. All this calamity and we haven't even mentioned a certain electoral contest. Meanwhile, Mark Rutte concluded a political saga that out-ran Soldaat van Oranje by announcing he will run for re-election as prime minister.

In a week of fake news and dodgy data, the Dutch government adopts the Niksen approach to disease control. As Covid-19 spreads through the Binnenhof and two ministers go into quarantine, the friendly folk at Farmers Defence Force turn up on Rob Jetten's doorstep with a box of meat products and a camera. Coronavirus also starts to hit the football world, while in Venlo VVV put up the weakest defensive display since Ferd Grapperhaus's wedding. There's uplifting news too as Rhenen's baby giant panda is no longer gender neutral and the first flying car is (almost) cleared for take-off.

It's been a week of blaming and shaming as the king and queen flew into a storm of outrage over their pandemic-busting trip to Greece. A Dutch hacker hijacked Donald Trump's Twitter, AZ snatched an unlikely win in Naples and the egg-pilfering gay penguins were up to their usual tricks. Further lockdown measures loom larger as coronavirus infection numbers continue to climb. And there's concern that up to 6,000 British people may become illegal immigrants at the stroke of midnight on January 1.