Finding You: by Dr. Brad Reedy

Dr. Reedy talks about Delay of Gratification and Low Frustration Tolerance and the developmental science behind it. He talks about how these traits related to other issues. He teaches parents how to support healthy development in these areas. He explains that Wilderness Therapy, specifically nomadic primitive living wilderness therapy, is an effective way at fostering growth in these areas.

Dr. Reedy discusses the work of John Gottman, Ph.d. and his concept of emotional coaching (in contrast to dismissive, dissaproving, or laissez-faire parenting). Gottman explains how learning to hear and validate children leads to resiliency and the reduction of mental health issues. Parents who focus on behaviors rather than emotions, tend to overvalue cooperation. Parents who see a child's "negative" emotions as an opportunity for intimacy are better suited to provide healthy guidance. He explains how this is all built upon the foundation of a parent's self-awareness.

Dr. Reedy discusses the vulnerabilities and underlying issues that may lead to electronic addictions. He discuses and compares substance abuse disorders with process addiction. He talks about parenting a child struggling with self-sabatoging and self-medicating behaviors.

Dr. Reedy discusses some of the concepts underlying wilderness therapy and how those dynamics are intensified in the winter and during the holiday season. He talks about how we support and celebrate holidays and how wilderness in the winter creates mindfulness and a greater appreciation for family.

Dr. Reedy talks about important aspects of parent-child dynamic that help to improve boundaries, self-efficacy, and resiliency. Parental self-care and appropriate praise are also discussed.

Dr. Reedy discusses the need for listening before talking or teaching. He describes how the brain's higher level functioning, when feeling threatened or stressed, is hijacked and the individual is unable to take-in information or reason. He talks about the need for parents and others to listen to children to quiet the flight or fight responses, before launching into lectures or lessons, so that those lessons may sink-in.

Dr. Reedy takes questions from family and friends of Evoke Therapy Program clients: How can you support someone who is in treatment? What does a typical day in wilderness therapy look like? What happens after wilderness therapy? What if a sibling doesn't want to talk or write letters to our child while they are in treatment?

Dr. Reedy discusses the difference between being real and being right. He discusses how our contexts impact us. He discusses how therapy can help us to repair our wounds and how the authentic self is fostered through connection.

Dr. Reedy discusses finding yourself in parenting. He explains how selfless parenting is a trap and how the first ingredient in a healthy parent is a healthy sense of self. He talks about how to combine the idea of supporting your child while taking care of yourself directly rather than indirectly.

Dr. Reedy reviews The Dance of Anger and what it can teach us about boundaries. He talks about how boundaries are hard work and how we use threats, nagging, lecturing, and all other sorts of behaviors in parenting instead of setting boundaries. He also talks about how setting healthy boundaries is akin to developing and modeling a healthy sense of self and helps to foster that development in our children.