Countdown with Keith Olbermann

SEASON 4 EPISODE 3: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: Hey! While Putin is here in Alaska so Trump can kiss his fanny, let's arrest him on behalf of the International Criminal Court and its member states Canada and Mexico who want to try him for kidnapping Ukrainian children and lying that they're orphans and forcibly converting them into Russians!  The willingness to let this scum set foot on American territory is all part of Trump's desperate need to win an award. A major award. A major award like the one the father wanted in the movie "A Christmas Story." He wants what his idiot press secretary Karoline Leavitt calls "The Noble Peace Prize." He'll do anything to get it. Because he needs it to distract you from Trumpstein. Happily Jayvee Vance is back to remind you all that the Epstein files contain all kinds of dirt about Democratic billionaire politicians of 20 years ago. Of whom Trump was one. Registered Democrat. Oops. And it turns out that meeting Vance and the FBI and DOJ chiefs and the White House Chief of Staff DIDN'T have at the VP's residence about Epstein WITHOUT Trump? They had the Trumpstein meeting. They just had it somewhere else. And once again: why did they have it WITHOUT TRUMP? And now Trump is trying to distract by demanding all those DC homeless people who read Truth Social move out of town or else he'll...make them look at his new gold ballroom. And oh by the way as the leading universities continue to fold before Trump's dictatorial censorship and threat, somebody's standing up to him: Stanford's student-run newspaper is suing him for violating the 1st Amendment rights of its staffers. The leaders of all of the El Foldo Universities (Columbia, Penn, UCLA) should resign and let the students lead the resistance. B-Block (29:17) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Kristi Noem is upset South Park made her look like a cartoon. Well, MORE like a cartoon. I need to apologize for Mike Huckabee again insulting England. And Pam Bondi just offered you $50,000,000 if you can tell her where Nicolas Maduro is. He's in Venezuela. Can we each have our 50 mill now? C-Block (41:00) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: It's the 37-year anniversary of Gretzky Week! My greatest scoop, the one I did the least work on of any story I ever covered. The sources literally phoned it in to me. The day Wayne Gretzky was traded to the Los Angeles Kings and I was the first on television with it. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

SEASON 4 EPISODE 2: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN  A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: The United States of America does not have a functioning government.  The Trump Dictatorship and the Library of Congress – Congress which Mike Johnson runs via a porn app – DELETED part of the official online edition of the Constitution – the part that limits the suspension of Habeas Corpus and bans presidents accepting foreign bribes. The Library says it was a coding error and would be fixed soon…ish. Yeah, the coding in Trump’s DNA. The White House had to DENY that the White House Chief of Staff was to meet last night with the Vice President, the Attorney General, the Deputy Attorney General, and the FBI Director to discuss what to DO about the Trump/Epstein cover-up scandal, and what to do WITH the RECORDING of the Deputy Attorney General’s two days’ of bargaining with a convicted pedophile and child sex trafficker… and nobody seemed to notice that the headline was that WHATEVER the Chief of Staff, A-G, Deputy A-G, and FBI Director WERE meeting with the Vice President ABOUT… the PRESIDENT WASN’T GOING TO BE THERE. There is no competent executive authority, no congressional or senate oversight, no reliable judiciary. The United States of America does NOT NOW have a functioning government. The nominal president has spent the last few days making up economic statistics and poll numbers and threatening his predecessors with prosecution for imaginary crimes punishable by death while wandering around the roof of the White House, and phoning in to a business network with racist moronity the content of which is just this side of a 19th century minstrel show, or continuing to get more and more in bed, figuratively, with a convicted pedophile and child sex trafficker, in a scheme to cover-up her crimes, her late partner crimes, and whatever the president’s role was or was not… in them. And the first and seventh people in the line of presidential succession were going to have dinner with their Epstein expert who just met with Gulaine Maxwell and the head of the FBI and the woman who RUNS the White House but NOT the president and you know it almost doesn’t MATTER if they were meeting to try to figure out what to do about Trumpsteen or not.  By 3:14 PM Eastern the Library of Congress said Sections 8, 9 and 10 of the 1st Article were back online so, shrug emoji, I guess there are limits on emoluments and suspending Habeas Corpus… for now. Fifteen minutes later, however, there were still huge swaths of all three sections missing from the official online version of the Constitution. But coding. And so what, it’s just the ONLINE version, what’s the difference? Trump just fired the head of the Bureau of Labor Statistics because she wouldn’t delete the official online jobs numbers and will soon find someone to post fabricated numbers online which will then be accepted as real – and official – because they’re ONLINE. There is no functioning government, just a mediocre Public Relations firm. Understaffed. Trying to sell Edsels, Google Glasses, New Coke, and fascism. B-Block (40:00) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Acting NASA "Director" Duffy wants to put nukes on the moon, even though that was the plot of the re-make of the movie "The Time Machine" in which nukes on the moon destroyed the moon and rendered earth uninhabitable good call reality TV boy. The New York Times won't stop trying to make Harvard-Fetch happen. And the Trump Council on Lack of Fitness, the one Super Bowl star Saquon Barkley turned down membership on? The Council announced he accepted. C-Block (55:00) THURSDAYS WITH THURBER: Of all his great stories, the one that might have been the most likely to have been written in order to be performed aloud, I humbly offer you this week: "The Night The Bed Fell."   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

SEASON 4 EPISODE 1: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: The Jobs Report will now be handled by the same guy who keeps score when Trump plays golf. But first, the unexplained move of Ghislaine Maxwell from near Alligator Alcatraz to Club Fed was just beginning to calm down when Trump detonated on Lenard McKelvey (political commentary name Charlamagne Tha God). All Charlamagne had done was to go on Fox News and claim to Lara Trump “I think that traditional conservatives are going to take the Republican Party back. I think there’s a political coup going on right now in the Republican Party that people aren’t paying attention to… we have the opportunity to have, like, a huge reset.” Trump has never known when to leave bad enough alone, but this time he just hit the side of the hornets’ nest with his tie. Called him “racist sleazebag… low IQ individual… has no idea what words are coming out of his mouth… knows nothing about me… this dope.” So now millions of people who DIDN’T know an often conservative, Trump-accepting-if-not-supporting African American was describing a Republican Palace Coup AGAINST TRUMP OVER EPSTEIN… have THAT new Trumpsteen tendril to ponder. Let’s sort this out. Somebody had to change Maxwell’s status as a registered sex offender to get her transferred to an all-women, all-white collar criminals, minimum security facility. She might no longer BE a registered sex offender; that could be a free sample offered by Trump if she’ll lie for him. The move to the cushier camp could be ANOTHER free sample. Or to make it easier for her to suffer rapid unscheduled disassembly. Also there’s a Trump cover-up OF The Epstein Files, and a Trump cover-up OF HIS OWN NAME IN the Epstein Files, and a Conservative Coup Against Trump OVER The Epsteen files, and the unexplained cushy new home for Epstein’s co-rapist. Oh and the true Orwellian shooting of the statistical messenger. But - you'd forgotten, hadn't you - he's always done this. He did this most infamously as Covid started. B-Block (30:17) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: There's little left for Andrew Cuomo. Apparently that includes flat out making up a story that mayor-to-be-Zamdani has never had a job before. Ryan "Who Put That Porn On The TV Monitor In My Office During The State Education Department Executive Meeting" Walters of Oklahoma doubles down. And the Republicans sure know how to sell American cars: with a picture of a car made in Soviet Russia in 1970 being sold by a Trump that looks like he was made in 1870. C-Block (40:00) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: The teachers of Hackley School in Tarrytown, New York are legendary. Nineteen of them there I graduated fifty years ago were still there the day I gave the Commencement Address thirty years ago. But now we may have lost the last of the greats, at least of that era. Gerry Murphy was the math teacher with empathy. He once recognized he had hit "the math wall" - he recognized I had. If he hadn't, I'd still be there failing that class for the 51st straight year. Gerald Murphy, R.I.P.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The podcast dives into the unsettling connections between Donald Trump and Jeffrey Epstein, highlighting Trump's indifference to victims like Virginia Giuffre. It scrutinizes the moral implications of leadership and the absence of accountability in politics. The discussion also reflects on political intrigue, including the push for transparency regarding Trump's past dealings. Additionally, it critiques the legacy of exploitation and consent, urging listeners to consider their roles in fostering a safer society.

A shocking alliance emerges as Donald Trump is criticized for his dealings with Ghislaine Maxwell, raising ethical alarms over a controversial immunity deal. The conversation digs deep into the moral implications of Trump’s associations and his supporters' complicity. Engaging humor punctuates the critique of political absurdities and media narratives, exploring how personal anecdotes reflect broader themes of accountability. Tackling media integrity, the discussion also critiques censorship while navigating the complexities of past political entanglements.

SEASON 3 EPISODE 148: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: Now that it's Murdochian Official (WHAT? Trump is IN the Trumpstein files? I'm shocked to discover there's gambling going on in here) and a Politico source says Trump and his White House goons are so lost "it's the first time I've ever seen them sort of paralyzed," expect them to push even harder on their QAnonTM fantasy that Barack Obama is guilty of 'treason' - even beyond the farce that the nitwitted Tulsi Gabbard and Karoline Leavitt presented yesterday. So it is time for President Obama to respond - and crush Trump. It is Obama's moment. Rather than again insist that EVERYBODY ELSE needs to DO more and SAY more and STAND for more, he should give a national address in which he sues Trump personally for slander and defamation and announce a ridiculous figure sought - like $500 Billion - and call for a conference at which he and President Clinton and other Democratic leaders and the SCOTUS justices they appointed and every decent Republican and every true American meets to strategize how to legally and immediately remove Trump from office and replace his criminal gang with a bipartisan caretaker government to carry us through to Election Day 2028. I will give a version of the speech Obama should now give, because he has been unexpectedly afforded the opportunity to perhaps actually start something that could end this nightmare of a madman steadily disassembling American democracy, a Temu Hitler gradually turning harassment of minorities into persecution and ethnic cleansing, a criminal who must stay in office at any cost or face the reality of dying in prison for his countless crimes. I have no doubt he can do better. I would not doubt he has a better idea. I will take no offense - provided he DOES something. “Trump is clearly furious,” a Politico close-to-the-White House source told its Trump stenographer yesterday. “It’s the first time I’ve seen them sort of paralyzed.” Say Hey! Trump’s White House is paralyzed! Excellent – kick them down the stairs, they can’t fight back. It’ll hurt more. The Trumpsteen Birthday Card is real and it CAN’T be the worst thing about Trump in the files that we now know Bondi told him about in May, otherwise he would’ve released the files. The photos of Epsteen at Trump’s second wedding are real, and THEY can’t be the worst otherwise he would’ve released it. Whatever’s worst is at LEAST B+ material. Keep hammering. B-Block (37:16) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: They piled up quick! Trump just asked Washington's NFL team to change its name; Trump once hammered Obama for asking Washington's NFL team to change its name. Mike Lee fell for an AI Jerome Powell resignation so badly done that the only word in the office logo that wasn't gibberish was "BUREAU," Chris Cillizza is actually criticizing somebody else for talking politics when nobody wants to hear that person talking politics, and the passing of the eternal Ozzy Osbourne inspires John Yang to get Ozzy's native country wrong and Alex Jones to get the cause of death wrong. C-Block (48:00) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: Can you believe it? After I presented the inarguable evidence that CBS didn't fire Colbert just to please Trump (how are you shutting him up if he's not fired until next May?) I get invited to speak at a PRO-Colbert rally. I explained what I was going to say, and the line went dead. One of the things I was going to say was how this is the same as MSNBC's firing of Phil Donahue in 2003. I was actually in the room for that, so let's go through it step by step.  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

SEASON 3 EPISODE 147: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: We have been burying the lede here. Trump. Is. Suing. Murdoch. Trump and Murdoch are at war. Over Jeffrey Epstein. The two worst people in the country, probably the world, at each other's throats, until further notice. Weeks, months, years. Amid rumors Murdoch's people at the Wall Street Journal are upworking ANOTHER Trump-Epstein/Epstein-Trump/Trumpstein story. And that Murdoch is preparing a Defcon scenario in which he turns Fox News against Trump. Because if Trump is stupid enough to try to put Murdoch out of business, Murdoch will have no choice but to try to put Trump out of business. Trump also seems to be doing everything else he can think of to make sure the Trumpstein story never leads the headlines again. Attacks his own people again. Left a paper trail inside the DOJ and FBI of Pam Bondi searching for thousands of Trump references inside an evidence pit the size of The New York Public Library. Changing the story of the latest plot against him for the sixth time in a week. And watching the polls - 17% approve of his handling of the Epstein issue - actually get worse since just last Thursday (89% want everything, not just the almost-meaningless Grand Jury testimony, released). Oh by the way there IS a Trump Client List inside DOJ/FBI. The only part of Trump's claim that there isn't that's true, is that it may not bear that title. There's literally 40 computers, 70 CDs of video, and 300 gigabytes of data. The Trumpstein story will swamp his presidency. For sheer volume it exceeds almost everything else Trump has ever done. It makes Watergate look like the editing out of four words in a 5,000 word document. IT'S WONDERFUL. Trumpstein, Trumpstein, Trumpstein. ALSO: Trump's unpopularity has now reached 1st Term proportions. Tulsi Gabbard is conflating two Russian stories and claiming the one nobody believed (Russia tampered with voting machines) disproves the one Robert Mueller proved (Russia hacked emails and got them to Trump's campaign). How does that work? I'll explain the psychology of morons who want to please their bosses, with the story of Tennessee Ernie Williams. And if you think Trump isn't brain dead he wrote something that must've come directly from a dream about how the Cleveland Guardians (formed 1901, not named "Indians" until 1915) are one of baseball's "six original teams" (Major League Baseball started 30 years earlier; it's HOCKEY with "the original six" and that's wrong too). B-Block (39:15) POSTSCRIPTS TO THE NEWS: I understand this busts the narrative and reduces our ability to suffer as martyrs, but there is one inarguable and unanswerable fact that disproves the almost-universally accepted premise that CBS cancelled Stephen Colbert solely to appease Trump. It's this: If they are silencing him, why have they decided to keep him on TV for THE NEXT TEN MONTHS? This is the Phil Donahue cancellation all over again. It works to CBS's corporate advantage to make it look like they are sucking up to the psycho. Sorry. This is the least of the reasons.  C-Block (1:09:10) MONDAYS WITH THURBER: Haven't done any of his priceless stories lately, and with Trump's new permanent Trumpstein Crisis, it's fitting to do James Thurber's stunningly prophetic saga "The Greatest Man In The World."See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

SEASON 3 EPISODE 146: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN BULLETIN "I never wrote a picture in my life," Trump told The Wall Street Journal, with his typical cognitive confusion, as he denied its bombshell report tonight that he contributed a bawdy letter and drawing of a naked woman to a special bound '50th Birthday Book' for Jeffrey Epstein in 2003.  Within minutes, literally dozens of pictures wrote (or as we'd call it, "drawn") by Trump appeared online - most of them auctioned for charity. Trump was immediately defended by others like JD Vance who said was written in the book (compiled by Ghislaine Maxwell) didn't sound like him. Which him? The "Grab 'Em" him or the "I never wrote a picture in my life" him? Vance also asks why WSJ hasn't produced the letter. And Laura Loomer says Trump never types letters, he writes notes. I have a fan letter from Trump - from 2014 - typed by him or somebody for him. The denials aren't relevant to the existence of the letter or what it says about Trump's relationship with Epstein at this perilous moment in Trump's presidency. And the denials didn't survive an hour. And they didn't deal with the most ominous part, the content of the letter, which includes Epstein and Trump "talking" to each other and concludes with Trump "saying" "Happy birthday - and may every day be another wonderful secret." Another wonderful secret? What in the HELL could that mean? ALSO: in addition to the Trump Epstein cover-up there is the Trump Health cover-up and parts of the story about his acutely swollen ankles don't hold up. And the only thing swollen about Stephen Colbert is his ego. CBS has tonight cancelled his show, effective next May. The man is untrustworthy and rarely funny but his platform was consistently anti-dictatorship so the forum will be missed even if he will not.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

SEASON 3 EPISODE 145: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:45): Trump self-destructs over the Epstein files: now calls his supporters “weaklings” calls Republicans “stupid” for believing the Epstein story HE sold them, now demands reporters don’t cover it, and demands MAGA stops talking about it. And now - most meaningfully - HE is connecting his Epstein Cover-up to his Russia Collusion Cover-up and continually tying Epstein to "The Steele Dossier." And what was the most grotesque part of the Steele Dossier story? Sexual perversion. Video. Blackmail. Trump is himself tying himself and Epstein to the purported pee tape! And that nauseating link and amazing implications (which he alone is making) are on top of the established reality: Donald Trump is president of the Jeffrey Epstein cover-up.Trump is RUNNING the Jeffrey Epstein cover-up. It’s TRUMP’S Jeffrey Epstein cover-up! President Pervert. President Epstein. President Pee Tape. President Pedophile. President cover-up. "TRUMP’S EPSTEIN COVER-UP" -  I want to hear that every day, from a leading Democrat. Every day and SIX TIMES on Sunday. Forever. I’m delighted Trump is destroying himself; I want Democrats to finish the job. I want it to destroy MAGA. I want it to bury them all, under a mountain of their own amoral, uncaring, "bullshit" – the word Trump just used in an enraged screed against his own MAGA "weaklings" whose support he now claims he no longer wants. Is pursuing this Shapiro-Steele story disgusting? Yes. Is it sleazy? Yes. Is it what the Trumpist scum would do? Yes. Is it a terrible way to prevent dictatorship and terror? What? There are RULES here? No, there are no rules. Pick up the damn tire iron. This is democracy-saving gold. Every. Damn. Day. Trump's the one who did this. He's the one who has now linked whatever he's choosing to do in covering up the Epstein story, to whatever there was in the Steele Dossier that would destroy him. He's the one who... crossed the streams. B-Block (32:00) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Homeland Security Spokesman Micah Bock with a cleverly phrased bit of dishonesty which actually says Texans calling FEMA during the floods had the same chance of getting through as people buying tickets have of winning the lottery. Mehmet Oz, whose senate bid crashed over crudités, now sees his Medicare disembowlin rationalization not cut it over carrot cake, and what trophies did soccer mogul Gianna Infantino let Trump walk away with this time? C-Block (42:00) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: Twenty years, almost to the day, since I quit smoking and began my MSNBC campaign to get others to quit, too. Which the PRESIDENT of MSNBC naturally responded to...by trying to kill me.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

SEASON 3 EPISODE 144: COUNTDOWN WITH KEITH OLBERMANN A-Block (1:45) SPECIAL COMMENT: Well, there it is, finally - the perfect storm that can dethrone or at least deplete Trump and of course it's his fault. HE has openly admitted he's covering up the Epstein Files, and he has in essence confessed he's in the Epstein Files. The problem is a simple one: Trump promised to give them pedophiles. They were promised politician pedophiles. They were promised that the politicians who were covering up Epstein were the pedophiles. And then one day Trump suddenly decided to announce that HE was the politician who was covering up Epstein and he SCOLDED them and HUMILIATED them and YELLED at them for challenging his god-ordained RIGHT to cover up Epstein, and they said in their confusion “but you promised us that you would reveal the pedophile politicians that were covering up Epstein and…wait a minute... that means...” As of mid-afternoon Trump was getting ratioed, on his own social media site, nearly 4:1 by angry, confused, moronic MAGAs. They have lived and died by his insistence that only pedophile politicians personally implicated in the Epstein documents and "client list" would be keeping them from being released. Now his two conflicting piles of bull have clashed, and he has been buried under them. UNFORTUNATELY TRUMP'S RESPONSE is utterly predictable: he will double down on Trump-ISIS atrocities, on torturing immigrants. It will give his 'people' the snuff films they want and may deflect their rage, at least for awhile. But remember, any time you see ICE threatening kids, to shout "Watcha doin? Grabbing those kids so Trump can take them to Epstein Island?" B-Block (30:46) THE WORST PERSONS IN THE WORLD: Karoline Leavitt thinks her conference calls are being interfered with by the devil. Riley Gaines' reward for stirring up murderous hate against Trans people? She gets to audition for Fox, and conflate criticism of Israel with antisemitism. Her skills are so varied: she's 85th best in swimming AND propaganda! And then there's winner Caitlin Francis, a rando from California who has the kind of advice only a homeschooling MAGA mother can present to you: dogs and cats have no souls, so if their vet bills exceed $1000, kill them. Say, Mrs. Francis, what's your over-under on your sick kids? (44:17) SPORTSBALLCENTER: Would you like to play in tomorrow night's baseball All-Star Game? Because that's the only stunt they have left to save the dying exhibition, now that they've decided that five big league games is sufficient experience to be an All-Star? And the floodgates may have just opened in St. Louis, where a pro sports team is eliminating its separate radio and TV play-by-play teams and simulcasting. This is the future, and it's not pretty. C-Block (1:05:00) THINGS I PROMISED NOT TO TELL: Somebody asked me what was my favorite joke that I ever did on the air. So here's a bunch - starring Albert Hall, the Takko-Bell trade, and the day the Reading Phillies set me up to get ejected from a minor league baseball game.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.