Connected Families Podcast

Working at home can be challenging! And exasperating. In this difficult season where many parents are juggling kids and working from home, our “new normal” is anything but normal. Parents are asking, “How do I stop kids interrupting conference calls?” It’s hard to know how to respond to the challenges of interrupted conference calls. But this can be a great opportunity to help kids feel both loved and successful. Applying the Connected Families Framework for parenting can equip you to Connect, Coach, and Correct from a foundation of Safety. (This article is also available as an audio or video download.) Read this article and apply what you’ve learned to experience a more peaceful conference call! What should you do first when kids interrupt an important conference call?  Outside of the immediate challenge, it’s helpful to consider, “What’s going on in me? How do I view this? Am I responsible for having a perfect child?”  Feeling shame and embarassment about your child’s behavior during a conference call causes you to react anxiously, which increases your child’s anxiety and neediness. It may be that a light-hearted “sorry for the delay” to participants is appropriate, but avoid the temptation to repeatedly or emphatically apologize. That’s stressful for you and your child.  If you are expecting a certain behavior, but haven’t helped your kids both value it and practice it, it’s a setup for frustration!  It’s also important to thoughtfully consider, “What’s it like to be my child when I get on a conference call?”  Having an unavailable parent can be tough on kids’ anxiety levels! Research shows that our brains release oxytocin under stressful conditions, especially in social isolation. These elevated oxytocin levels drive an urgency to get help when we feel stressed or anxious. Your child’s demands may be a sign of elevated stress levels. In addition, up until age three or four, a child’s worldview generally revolves around himself. That child will probably not be thinking of your personal comfort during that important call for work.  Considering all this, it doesn’t have to be perfect! Ditch those profuse apologies, take a deep breath, and remember that these are great opportunities to extend God’s grace and mercy to yourself, and to your child.  Want to avoid kids interrupting conference calls? Be proactive. Thoughtful and intentional connection can go a long way! Before your meeting, prepare by connecting well with your child – even if it is just three minutes. Let them know you are delighted in them. Make meaningful eye contact. Fill their cup! Enable them to be peaceful so they can head off to be independent.  One mom, who is working from home, stated, “I have been trying to connect with my kids through short bursts of focused, joy-filled attention frequently throughout the day. It seems to be helping them to play independently for longer periods of time, which is helping me to get things done that I need to.” It probably won’t be helpful to just tell kids not to interrupt. It may even cause more anxiety! Coach them and build skills ahead of time to demonstrate what you want them to do instead. If you are expecting a certain behavior, but haven’t helped your kids both value it and practice it, it’s a setup for frustration!  How can you set your child up for success? Proactive coaching goes a long way in preventing interruptions: Teach your children appropriate ways to ask for attention, like a tap on the arm. Help them practice this new skill by pretending you are on an important call. Give special signs (thumbs up/wink) that communicate: “I see you and I care!” If they want to show you something, let them know they can put their project or drawing in a pre-designated “waiting spot” until the call is over. Keeping this promise, and attending to it right away when the call is done, will build trust.Teach the importance of peaceful waiting. This can be practiced and modeled throughout the ebb and flow of daily life. Teach conflict resolution to decrease the need for your help in a tussle. Check out our Sibling Conflict online course. One mom who is taking the course said she would previously run in during a sibling conflict as the “judge.” She began implementing some of the skills taught in the Sibling Conflict course. Later on, during another conflict, the mom was going to step in to help a conflict, but her seven-year-old said, “I got this mom! We can solve this!” Evaluate which proactive strategy works best for your child. After coaching and practicing, evaluate what works best. Problem-solve based on what you learn from the times when things go better.  Other practical tips that may help:  Avoid having kids do school work during your calls. Keep a bin of toys (new or old favorites) reserved only for when you are on calls. Maybe even have a unique bin for each child.Designate special separate spaces for kids during calls.  Set boundaries and expectations before the call. An important part of being proactive is to set boundaries and expectations before the call: Ask your child, “What’s important to you when I am on a call?”It’s equally important to ask, “What do you think is important to me, and to the person I’m talking to, in this meeting?”  Offer two choices for activities. If possible and appropriate, satisfy your child’s curiosity by allowing him to meet the caller. Set clear boundaries by putting a sign on the door. One sign read, “Mom is WORKING. Do NOT disturb unless the house is on fire or someone is bleeding. A lot.” Another option: Offer incentives! Let them know that if they don’t interrupt, they can make a zoom call to a grandparent or friend. Remind them of this just before the call. Related Posts3 Ways To Help When Your Child Refuses To Do Schoolwork4 Tips for Parenting During a PandemicAm I a Bad Parent? | Ep. 28How to Teach Flexibility Using a Pipe Cleaner “After all this, my child is STILL interrupting my work calls!” Even with proactive coaching, your child (or spouse) may still  interrupt. Sometimes this is going to happen no matter what  you do! Remember this viral video of a parent conference call that did not go as planned?   When it all falls apart and it’s time to correct during the call, remember to try to decrease your child’s anxiety, not increase it, so the interaction doesn’t escalate to an outburst in front of your colleagues! Here are some ideas to let your child know, “I’m for you, not against you,” even when they’ve messed up:  Offer a quick hug. Affirm them for whatever success they had (assuming they have spent at least some time trying to play independently.) Smile as you offer two clear “You can” choices such as, “You can hold my hand and sit on the floor without talking, or take a toy and lay on my bed til I’m done.”  If the interruptions were clearly not at an acceptable level, afterward you can guide your child to do a do-over. They can practice a respectful arm pat interruption and then quickly and quietly return to play. This will help them feel more confident about what to do next time. Encouragement (not shame!), will build their identity of “I’m learning and getting more ‘grown up’ all the time!” And your affection will grow that vital belief, “I am loved no matter what!” Your child’s confidence and security might be the most important accomplishment of your conference call!  We are here for you! Please let us know how we can help. We would love to hear how some of these ideas have worked for your family! Email your prayer requests and success stories to info@connectedfamilies.org. Prayer Father, thank you for helping me juggle so much. Help me to love my kids in the middle of the messes. Comfort me with a sense of your Holy Spirit coming alongside me with wisdom and mercy in these difficult times. In Jesus name, Amen. 

Like many of us, your child might be grieving his pre-coronavirus life. This challenging time can bring strong emotions to the surface in our kids (and in us as parents). These emotions can be signs of a child’s underlying grief. And difficulty in expressing that grief.  Read on to learn why it’s important to allow your children to grieve, and healthy ways to help them process their grief. This article is also available as a video or audio download. Why is it important for our children to grieve? We’re hearing from a lot of parents whose kids still aren’t adjusting well to the new challenges of “Stay-at-Home” orders and social distancing guidelines. Resistance to homework. Power struggles. Tantrums. Withdrawn children. These are just some of the challenges parents are facing. Add to this list the responsibility of managing school work while trying to work from home and you’ve got a recipe for stress and discouragement.  Parents tell us they’re trying to help their kids adjust but making little progress. It’s a tough load! Grief is real! Our kids, right along with the rest of us, are dealing with grief right now. It feels unnatural and even overwhelming to lose our normal life rhythms.  Our kids are likely grieving the loss of school friends and other activities. Their lives have been turned upside-down and they are probably limited in their ability to process those feelings. Many of us can probably relate to this struggling mom: “Dear Connected Families, I need help figuring out how to help my four year old manage his grief over the loss of his wonderful life at preschool. His teachers at his preschool are so loving and he has wonderful friends there. He misses his teachers and friends and wants to hug them and play with them. I’m doing what I can, I bought new puzzles and books.  I’m trying to fill his love tank but he has such intense needs and I have a two year old as well. Please help.”  Are we distracting our children from their grief? As your child struggles, your first inclination may be to distract him with “happy things.” But you don’t want to teach your child to sweep their feelings aside and pretend they don’t exist. Instead, view this as an opportunity to teach a valuable lesson in dealing with disappointment. You probably don’t blatantly order your child to toughen up. However, that might be the message your child hears. If you put more energy into trying to relieve your child’s disappointment than you do into validating it, you may drive the mourning inward.  Kids need permission to feel sad. Sometimes kids have big feelings of grief. But when invalidated, those feelings get locked up inside and come out in twisted ways. They can only intensify an already difficult situation.   Kids need to feel safe and be given permission to express their grief. How to help your child process grief Hard as it is, don’t try to help your kids “get over it.” The best gift you can give them is to be present and to sit with them in their emotions and discontent. Jesus told us, “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.” There is a direct link between mourning and comfort. The term here for mourning comes from the Greek word, pentheus. It means to express externally what’s being experienced internally. When the grief is deep, it may take some time for even the most mature among us to express the deep things that are pent up inside.  God is patient with us when we grieve. Likewise, our patience and presence with our kids during their grief will help them learn to understand and navigate their feelings. Our patient presence with our kids communicates in a tangible way that God is present with them too.  God gives us safety and permission to mourn. As we mourn, we are then able to receive God’s comfort. Grieving in a healthy way Notice how this mom, who is a coaching client, helped her 9-year-old daughter (who does not like questions about her feelings!) to grieve in a healthy way: “They announced today that our schools will now be closed for the rest of the year. Blaire was SUPER upset and angry. She was slamming things on the table, giving me the evil eye and stating all the things she wouldn’t do. I was able to stay calm and remember that she needs me to not take it personally and stay safe.  She ran to a private spot.  A little while later I joined her and  gave her a piece of gum. I didn’t ask her questions, but just said ‘I know this stinks and isn’t what you want. I’m not excited about it either. But we will get through it together.’ Later at dinner I pulled out our feelings chart and we each went around and pointed at all of the feelings we felt today and why. AND Blaire actually did it!  It was such a great and logical way for us to talk about feelings in a non-threatening way.” Like this mom, we can give permission to our kids to say their hard feelings. We can safely communicate to them, “That must be really hard! Is there anything I can do to be with you in it?” This begins to unlock their feelings and opens the door to start talking. We can then begin problem solving ways to manage these difficult emotions. Practical ideas for helping your child express grief: Paper plate activity (adapt for teenagers) – draw different emotions on paper plates. This will help kids understand that anger often covers up deeper feelings of anxiety, loss, hurt, sadness, and insecurity.Hands-on activities – encourage younger children to draw their feelings, or even use play-doh.Snuggle with them when they are feeling sad.Use imaginative play to express their disappointment. Talk about what is good, and what’s not good about the situation, and the child’s feelings related to each thing. Then, discuss what you and your child can do about the parts that are not good.Parent coaching may give you insight into how to best support your child/ren during this difficult time. It might be the best investment you make for your family!  Kids need to feel safe and be given permission to express their grief. It is natural for your kids to be grieving their pre-coronavirus lives. Your child’s need to grieve and mourn are opportunities for you to be present with him just as God is present with us. You might be his best helper as you give him permission to mourn. As a result, we can all receive the comfort of God’s presence, and His purposes for us, as we navigate this challenging season. Prayer for parents of grieving children: Lord, I want to see my children the way You see them. Would you help open my eyes to see what is behind their struggling? Give me grace and kindness as I parent today. Help me to meet each of my children where they are and sit with them in their discouragement.  Please let us know how we can pray for you and continue to come alongside you during this time. We are here for you, and we are praying for you! Email your prayer requests to info@connectedfamilies.org. Related Posts3 Ways To Help When Your Child Refuses To Do Schoolwork4 Tips for Parenting During a PandemicAm I a Bad Parent? | Ep. 28How to Create a Simple Sensory Diet for Restless, Homebound Kids | Ep. 30How to Teach Flexibility Using a Pipe Cleaner What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT.

Are you “walking on eggshells” with restless, homebound kids? Do your kids have a case of “Grumpy Child Syndrome”? Your family may need an extra dose of a healthy sensory diet. What is a sensory diet? Why is it important? And how can you incorporate it in practical ways with your kids? Read on. (This article is also available as a video or audio download.) In the midst of stressful times, we may find ourselves encountering grumpy kids. (We may even admit to experiencing some grumpy feelings of our own!) There is nothing wrong with you or your kids.  Just like our bodies need healthy food at the right times of the day so we don’t get “hangry,” we also need healthy, timely sensory experiences. Everyone’s body needs healthy movement to help improve mood! Feelings of grumpiness and restlessness in our kids could be signaling the need for a more balanced sensory diet.  What is a sensory diet?  A sensory diet is the purposeful use of sensory and movement activities at key times of the day (along with quiet times strategically interspersed) to make it easier to naturally regulate energy and emotions. Big muscle play is especially important for a sensory diet. Why is a sensory diet important? When we’re upset, our brains trigger the release of fight or flight neurotransmitters to get us ready to “slug or run” in self-protection. The blood flows away from our frontal lobe and goes to our big muscles. If that body chemistry isn’t used for its intended purpose of big muscle action, it stays in a person’s system and creates an ongoing sense that something’s wrong. And, when a child’s nervous system is on edge, it doesn’t take much to trigger an aggressive or defensive reaction.  What’s the answer? Play! When placed in a tense situation, play-deprived rats were either aggressive or ran away to a corner. Remarkably, an hour of play a day offsets this tendency. There’s evidence this is also true for humans! Knowing this about rats, it’s no wonder why cooped-up kids are so irritable… Big muscle play uses up those fight/flight neurotransmitters and increases serotonin, the feel-good hormone that kids are often low on. Sensory activities can increase serotonin and improve mood! How does a sensory diet work? Just like we need good food at times of hunger, look for the typical times of day that kids might get edgy out of “sensory hunger.” Shortly before that time offer some sensory activities. Consider interspersing “recess” at scheduled times of the school work day, especially before tackling a difficult subject. Another typical “sensory hungry” time is late afternoon or right before dinner. Your child could use a hop ball to bring the napkins to the dinner table one at a time, an activity that has helped numerous kids sit better at dinner.  If you have kids that get riled up with big muscle play, a key to an effective sensory diet can be making sure activities are rhythmical and purposeful rather than wild and chaotic. Provide structure and repetition, using obstacle courses, bear walk or crab walk relays, music and movement activities, or bike rides if those are an option. Get creative with sensory materials at home One mom was struggling with her son and his math. She gave him the idea to slide down the stairs in a sleeping bag, climb back up and do it again. And again. Structured, repetitive climbing and bumping! He went from being testy and cranky, to happy and cooperative! This particular kind of movement had given his body and brain the sensory input it needed to be calm and focused for his schoolwork. One family recently got a trampoline* for the backyard to deal with the growing “cooped up” restlessness they were seeing. Jumping on the trampoline brought dramatic changes to one son’s behavior and outbursts. The mom declared, “My boy is back. He has been full of joy. All the angsty moments, arguments with siblings, and hiding in his room have stopped.” (She also told me she was loving the trampoline as well!) We can help our kids diminish their stress and increase their joy with the right kind of movement! Practical activities to help your restless kids The key to helping our kids become more regulated is to be encouraging and intentional in setting them up for regular sensory activities. It’s important to be inviting, not demanding, and join in the fun as much as possible. Whatever activity you choose to do, be sure to help kids write safety rules for all new equipment before using. There are many practical ways to incorporate a sensory diet:  Climbing. Hide things on opposite levels of the house and give clues to get kids to climb up and down the stairs. Or use a  doorway swing hanger and attach a playset suspended ladder. Clip a bucket at the top, and put puzzle or Lego pieces in the bucket for kids to retrieve one at a time. Jump and crash. Put a mattress on the floor (maybe even store your child’s bed frame) and pile it with pillows. Give your child a step stool or chair to climb up on and then jump. Create an obstacle course with household objects. Hopball.  Relive your childhood! Doorway swing hanger with a calming mesh swing or inner tube swing. Massage therapy and pressure activities. Deep pressure back rubs and squeezes increase serotonin and decrease stress hormones. Kids movement videos on YouTube. Play wrestling. Sunshine! Being in the sun boosts serotonin levels. Sunlight, even on cloudy days, is far brighter than indoor light. Play tents filled with pillows and stuffed animals can give needed quiet rest away from the commotion. Create a martial arts studio…in your house! Do you have a toddler? Here are some great ideas for using household items! For a complete list of fun activities see 60 Ways to Get Kids Moving and Laughing. Reframe tense situations with compassion Remember this as you seek to help your family through difficult times: reframe tense situations with compassion. “Grumpy” is not your child’s identity. God made you and your child for good things and for His purposes. In the midst of our daily struggles, we may feel misaligned from God’s purposes. We can reframe our situation with grace for our kids and ourselves.  We would love to hear your stories! How have these sensory activities helped your family? What new activities have you found to bring calm and regulation to restless kids?  Please let us know how we can pray for you and continue to come alongside you during this time. We are here for you, and we are praying for you! Email your prayer requests to info@connectedfamilies.org.  *If you choose to allow your children to jump on a trampoline, please remember to follow the guidelines and take safety precautions. © 2020 Connected Families Does your child need help calming down? Would a free course presenting you 7 sensory strategies to calm your child be useful? If yes, take our FREE online course 7 Practical Calming Strategies for Kids. TELL ME MORE Related Posts3 Reasons Kids Misbehave & How You Can Respond With Grace and Love3 Ways To Help When Your Child Refuses To Do Schoolwork4 Tips for Parenting During a PandemicHelp Your Struggling Child Grieve His Pre-Coronavirus Life | Ep. 31How to Limit Screen Time with Healthy Habits & a Bigger YESHow to Teach Flexibility Using a Pipe CleanerIs Your Child Exhausted and Cranky After School?

You are not a bad parent. Start learning how to stop parenting out of guilt or anxiety. This content is also available in an audio version.  When we’re in crisis, the voices built most deeply in us come out. Sometimes that can be positive. Other times it turns self-critical.  Instead of blaming ourselves, we can remind our hearts that we are created in God’s image to do good works. We can be vessels of God’s grace and presence to our families during this difficult time.  Look for the bright spots in your parenting As hard as it may be to see at times, there are bright spots in your parenting.  It’s almost never as bad it could be.  Let’s get a little deep for a moment: There is a distance between “as bad as it could be” and what is actually happening. The efforts you are making to bring God’s grace to your family are what is creating that distance. In other words, things are not as bad as they could be because of the things you are doing well!  Focus on what you are doing well as a parent and allow God to grow those moments each day. Tips to grow your parenting without shame You can do better than mere survival during challenging times. You can even grow your parenting and come out better on the other side.  Here are some practical tips: Slow down, take deep breaths, trusting that Jesus is fully in control and that He never leaves us.Look at the opportunities. Look for “yes” moments that are now possible because of less time constraints.Look at the successes. Ask yourself, “When did I connect well with one of my kids?” or “When did I hold it together when I could have lost it and what helped me to achieve that?” In other words, things are not as bad as they could be because of the things you are doing well!  One mom’s parenting success during “stay-at-home” orders Enjoy this story from Abby, mom of 3 from Minnesota, who has been working hard to connect well with her kids. She is learning to choose grace and be present with her kids in the midst of life’s daily messes: Now let me just tell you on Day 1… oh wow!  That day was HARD. I am an extreme extrovert.  I gotta see my people. And then there was the FEAR. Fear of the unknown.  Fear of the virus. Not being able to know, to plan, to execute our daily routine. That first day there were tears and screaming. The anxiety – not just mine but my kids’ – was thick and oppressive. But I had a change in mindset over the next 2-3 days. I realized that we are “all in this together,” and EVERYONE else was having a similar experience, so there was nothing I could do but truly surrender it all.  Everything that was most important to me was under one roof. So it turns out I did have my people.  And I still had a Jesus who I knew was walking alongside me in all of this, and I had the framework that Connected Families had given me.  I do struggle to stay calm but I read Jim’s post where he said, “Whenever I feel anxious I literally tell myself, ‘Jim, this isn’t helping. You can’t solve it. But you can breathe deep and remember that Jesus promised to never leave you nor forsake you. (Deep breath.) That’s it. Do it again.’” I did this.  You’re not a bad parent You are not alone. In your community, and the world as a whole, there are millions of parents walking through this together. Struggling does not make you a bad parent. Every family has unique challenges and trials to navigate and it can be exhausting. We see you. We hear you. And we want to walk alongside you. Share your prayer requests with us – we’d love to pray for you. Related Posts"Are We Gonna Be Okay?""God is Always Up to Something!" | Ep. 273 Ways To Help When Your Child Refuses To Do Schoolwork4 Tips for Parenting During a PandemicHelp Your Struggling Child Grieve His Pre-Coronavirus Life | Ep. 31I Lost My Temper With My Child; Can I Make It Better?I Was a Critical Parent: 6 Steps I Took to Find a More Loving WaySometimes I Cry About My Parenting MistakesWhat To Do When Kids Interrupt Important Conference Calls | Ep. 33Why How YOU Were Parented Probably Won’t Work Anymore Prayer Lord, I ask you to fill me with an ability to see bright spots. To see past the difficulties, the failures, the discouragement. With your grace illuminate those bright spots so I can rejoice and see what you are doing right in our midst. I pray your blessing on our family today. In Jesus name, Amen. What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT.

NOTE: This content is available as a video,  a blog post (below), or a 7-minute podcast. We trust this will serve every situation and learning style well. Here at Connected Families we realize this is a tough time for many in our community and in the world as a whole. In response to the current pandemic, we sent out a survey last week to hear, “What is it like to be you?” The response was overwhelming, with a thousand parents responding in just a little over a day. People shared a wide range of responses: About 15% of you said you are doing quite well, finding less stress, and deeper connection in the slower pace. Another 15% said that stress is about normal. Still, another 70% of you are feeling more stress than usual, some of you a LOT more than usual. We read through each of your responses, and what you told us you needed was practical encouragement in short, bite-sized chunks. So, today,  we want to share a word of encouragement with you – You are NOT alone in this! Jesus “GETS” you! Hebrews 4:15 & 16 says,“For we do not have a high priest who is unable to empathize with our weaknesses, but we have one who has been tempted in every way, just as we are—yet he did not sin. Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.”   It helps to have a little context to really take in this verse. Temptations often have more power under stress. And Jesus had more than His share of stress, some of which you may relate to right now:  He was so exhausted that He fell asleep, in a boat, in a storm.  He “managed” 12 disciples who often acted like selfish children.  He navigated a stressful religious and political climate.  He was primarily homeless during the 3 years of his ministry, and had no regular income.  So basically…. He gets us, because He has walked in our shoes! He knows how hard this is for many of you right now.  No matter what’s going on in your life right now, Jesus is with you and cares about you! Regardless of what the constant conflict, messy house, or undone checklist looks like. So how does knowing that “Jesus gets us!” help in a tangible way during this unprecedented situation, especially when you’re feeling stressed and overwhelmed? Stress happens when there’s a gap between expectations and your ability to meet those expectations. What does this mean for me, right now? Here are a few practical ideas to help you keep things in perspective:  First of all, lower the expectations you have for yourself. Stress happens when there’s a gap between expectations and your ability to meet those expectations. Maybe you’re feeling pressure to make this a purposeful, connective time with your family. Or shine the light of Jesus to those around you. Or just get that to-do list done. Jesus exceeded expectations so you don’t have to meet your own!  Next, consider what expectations you have that might feel burdensome, and release yourself from those expectations!  Emphasize God’s mercy in the middle of the mess. Claim God’s abundant, overflowing mercy during your messiest, angriest moments. And say it out loud! During an angry power struggle with one of our kids, Lynne had a “Holy Spirit insight,” and said it out loud. “You know what I think God just said to me? …that He has so much mercy on us in our struggle! He knows how hard it is for you and I to get along. And He loves us.” They both experienced God’s merciful peace. So, in the middle of the craziness, take a breath and remember that God is with you, and say that out loud.   God has abundant mercy for us. God has abundant mercy and good purposes for us in all things. One of the most memorable sermons we’ve ever heard was the spontaneous testimony of a young man in a small, lively church. As this young man was asked by the pastor to share a word, and he stood up and said, “One thing I’ve learned is that God is always up to somethin’ and it’s always somethin’ good!” He shared numerous examples, and after each one he joyfully repeated, “God is always up to somethin’ and it’s always somethin’ good!”  During many difficult times in our life together we have consistently seen this truth remain. We know that God offers peace that passes understanding. And this peace has nothing to do with our circumstances. So ask yourself this:  In this very difficult time, what might God be up to in my family?  When it’s all over, what have I learned from this time?  Has my family benefited from a slower pace of life? Maybe what you’ll have learned is simply to lean into God’s very present mercy like you never have before. And what more valuable thing could any family learn?! We are journeying with you. Whatever your experience, we are journeying with you. While our children are grown and moved out, many on our staff have children of all ages and are navigating parenting challenges right alongside you. Our team loves to pray for the Connected Families community, so email us at info@connectedfamilies.org and let us know how we can pray for you. May God show you His mercy as you seek to lead your family with grace. We’d like to close with a virtual blessing over you: “Lord, we are so grateful that you are a God overflowing with mercy, flooding the generations with your mercy. And so we come to You boldly asking for grace and mercy to help in time of need. We ask You to speak to each family in their messiest, neediest moments to be their comfort and their come-alongside Holy Spirit help. We pray that you would help these parents and families release any burdensome expectations because you have exceeded all expectations with the gift of grace through Your Son. We are confident that You love to answer these prayers in Jesus’ name. Amen.”  Sign up below to receive a weekly dose of encouragement straight to your inbox:   Related Posts“Are We Gonna Be Okay?”3 Ways To Help When Your Child Refuses To Do Schoolwork4 Tips for Parenting During a PandemicAm I a Bad Parent? | Ep. 28Teach Your Kids How to Trust God

When your kids misbehave, and you need to discipline them, have you considered what they are learning? Are they learning to submit to angry power? Or, perhaps, are they learning how to get better at hiding their misbehavior and sin? Guiding kids to right their wrongs is no easy task. Most families have one child that demands more of our parenting energy. Is that child hearing an unspoken (or spoken!) message that he/she is a “problem child”? Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, dive into the “Correct” level of our framework – teaching the message, “You are responsible for your actions.” With plenty of practical applications and helpful stories from other parents, this podcast is packed with ideas for guiding kids to right their wrongs. These ideas will equip you to lead your family with grace as you guide your children towards reconciliation skills they will utilize for a lifetime. In this podcast you’ll: be given creative alternatives to yelling, time-outs, and punishment, while still holding your children accountable.explore how guiding our children to reconcile in a healthy way when they are younger can have a positive impact on their relationships both now and in the future. learn a value system for correcting your child that does not just focus on correcting behavior. Mentioned in this podcast: Galatians 6:1 Galatians 6:7 Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.) Related PostsAvoiding Power Struggles Is Simpler Than You ThinkDiscipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15Teaching Kids to Be Responsible for Their Actions | Ep. 14This Is Better Than My Old Consequences for a Disrespectful ChildWhat Is the Goal of Your Discipline?

What skills would you like your kids to have when they go out into the world? Should you drop what you’re doing to bring them something they forgot? How can you prepare your kids for conflicts they will certainly encounter in their relationships, family, and work environments later in life? What does it look like to mentor our kids? Listen in as Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, explore what it means to have a vision for your family and give practical ideas for ways to mentor your kids in skills, wisdom, and faith. In this podcast you’ll learn: parenting skills that build emotional intelligence.how thoughtful questions and natural impacts can build wisdom. ideas to model faith and humility so we nurture our kids’ faith in God’s grace and mercy. Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.)  Related Posts5 Ways to T.E.A.C.H. Your Kids ValuesAre You Tired of Having to Nag Your Kids? | Ep. 35Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15How to Limit Screen Time with Healthy Habits & a Bigger YESLeading Down a Grace-Filled Path | Ep. 17Teach Your Kids How to Trust GodTwo Questions That Defuse Almost Any ConflictWhy Doesn’t Your Tween Want to Shower? We Don’t Know Either.

You may have heard, “Move TOWARD the struggling child.” This phrase might seem counter-intuitive. Often, when our child is struggling, the last thing we want to do is connect with them.  When we show love unconditionally, especially when our kids misbehave, they will then genuinely understand that our love cannot be earned. And that our love is not reserved exclusively for when they are obedient, helpful, or behaving in the way we want. Join Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, as they discuss what it looks like to make sure our kids know we not only love them unconditionally, but enjoy them. In this podcast you’ll: be given quick, easy “fly-by” ideas for connecting with your kids.learn strategies to help kids understand you still love them, in the middle of misbehavior.receive scripts and words to use that show empathy.hear a story from a mom whose empathy helped her connect with her daughter and get below her daughter’s anger.  Mentioned in this podcast: Zephaniah 3:17 Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related Posts20 Beautiful Empathy Statements to Show Kids You Really See Them3 Unexpected Parenting Strategies to Help Your Highly Sensitive Child Thrive5 Powerful Ways to Connect with a Teen Who LiesConnecting with Toddlers & Teens During DisciplineDiscipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15The Powerful Role of Empathy in DisciplineTwo Questions That Defuse Almost Any ConflictWHAT-EVER!! Ideas for Responding to Sass With Class We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.) 

We all want a peaceful home where kids feel safe. But sometimes safety is hard to attain, especially when life is stressful. How do we respond during hard parenting moments? How can we do better at walking in peace and joy with our kids? In this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, dive into creating a culture of safety at home. Applying what you learn as you listen can impact your family for generations to come. In this podcast you’ll learn to: look inward and ask the question, “What’s going on in ME?”.build a strong foundation for parenting, knowing who you are in Christ.show your kids, in a way they can understand, that you are a flawed human.communicate “You are safe with me,” in practical ways that can help your kids build a solid foundation on God’s grace and truth. Mentioned in this podcast: Blog post: Let Go of Shiny Grab Hold of GraceBlog post: How to Parent Together When You’re Total OppositesI Thessalonians 2 as a parenting chapter in the Bible Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Related PostsDiscipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15Enjoy Your Children the Way You Always Wanted To | Ep. 44Fear-Based Compliance vs. Heartfelt Obedience: How to Avoid One & Inspire the OtherHow to Become an Emotionally Safe ParentThe Small Magnet That is Making a BIG DifferenceTo Spank or Not to Spank?What to Say When Your Child Makes Outrageous Statements | Ep. 37When Out-of-Control Kids Can’t Hear Your Gentle Voice We are excited to offer a Connected Families Framework magnet to you for only $5! (This price even includes shipping and handling!) It can help remind you of all you are learning through the podcasts. Order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace. (Live outside the United States? You can print a copy of the framework here.) 

How do you define yourself as a parent? Do you feel stuck in your parenting and want to explore a new way?  In this podcast Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, are excited to introduce you to a structured framework for parenting that can help bring balance to your parenting. You CAN find balance between grace and consequences while teaching your kids wisdom, values, and faith. This podcast can bring balance to your parenting: learn the origins of the Connected Families Framework and how Jim and Lynne came up with the idea.be introduced to a structure you can use and follow in your parenting to better reach your child’s heart during the messes of daily life.be equipped with a model for restoration and grace to be used during discipline that will train your child to make right what they’ve made wrong.hear a personal story from our online course moderator, Stacy, who has learned to change the trajectory of relationships in her family by following the Connected Families Framework for parenting. Mentioned in the podcast: How to Parent Together When You’re Total Opposites Like what you hear? Don’t forget to subscribe, rate, and review Connected Families podcasts so you don’t miss a single episode and others can find us more easily! Do you feel like a visual reminder would help remind you of these four messages and principles in your parenting? We have just the thing. Check out our Connected Families Framework magnet and order one for your fridge, your bathroom mirror, your car, or wherever you might need a quick reminder as you seek to lead your family with grace during the messes of daily life. Order one today!