Connected Families Podcast

“How do you think that makes your sister feel?” or “You can’t do that to him!” Sound familiar? As a parent you likely want your child to be known as kind, generous, sensitive, and empathetic. These expectations can cause stress and anxiety if we see our child behaving in a way that lacks the power of empathy.  Empathy is a natural skill we are born with, right? Nope. What is natural for kids? To be selfish, egocentric, and not think about the feelings of others. So you might be wondering, “Can empathy be taught to kids?” Absolutely.  Today, Stacy Bellward (podcast host) talks with Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families). Together they offer hopeful solutions and practical insights that can graciously guide you and your child toward empathy, using our Connected Families Framework for parenting. It may be a longer journey for some kids than others, but you’ll be equipped with the tools to start them in the right direction! In todays episode, you’ll learn: Practical ways to nurture brain pathways that help develop empathyHow to engage with and teach empathy in sibling conflictThe power of gentle, thoughtful questions to draw out empathy from your childHow Jesus modeled empathy Mentioned in this podcast: Hebrews 4:15-16Video: Brené Brown on Empathy (Kid Friendly!) Video: Brené Brown on EmpathyPrayer of Saint Francis Want to learn more? Can True Empathy Really be Taught to Kids?20 Statement that Communicate Empathy to KidsThe Five Powerful Results of Empathy In our Sibling Conflict online course we teach parents how to teach their kids the four steps of The Peace Process. Whether you have constant sibling battles in your home or you want to lay a strong foundation of reconciliation, enroll in the course! You’ll be helping your kids build a lifetime of healthy conflict resolution.

Do you ever feel like you want to try and fix your marriage? Or change something about your spouse? The solution to this challenge might surprise you! In this podcast, Jim and Lynne Jackson (co-founders of Connected Families) are hosted by their good friend, Ellie Hope Collins, on her podcast Hope Reclaimed. We are passionate about building strong marriages as a vital piece of the parenting puzzle! In honor of Valentine’s Day, we have a special episode for you on emotionally safe marriages. “Our marriage is all built on this strange, quirky, messy foundation of grace, of safety, of identity in Christ.” -Jim Jackson Listen in as Jim, Lynne, and Ellie have a candid, thought-provoking conversation about building a strong foundation of honesty and communication in marriage. Jim and Lynne share how they have successfully applied parts of the Connected Families Framework to their own marriage. This podcast is full of marriage and communication tips you can use today! We trust you will finish feeling encouraged and equipped. In today’s episode, learn more about: how to embrace your spouse’s quirks without letting them drive you crazy!building a solid foundation of safety by asking, “What’s going on in me?” getting back to connection after conflict.avoiding the “shame-blame” cycle.the sacred role of God’s grace and mercy while working through marriage struggles.  Mentioned in this podcast: Matthew 5:23, 24 Matthew 18 Want to learn more? Fighting for Love–Even When it’s Hard What Could Have Ruined Our Marriage How to Parent Together When You’re Total Opposites Host bio: Giving support to men and women healing from divorce, trauma and betrayal, Ellie Hope Collins is the founder of the ministry Hope Reclaimed. Through podcasts, live and virtual events, and the Healing From Divorce Online Course, she has helped thousands of men and women recognize that healing is available. Ellie hails from St. Paul, Minnesota where she lives with her husband, Austin.  *This podcast originally aired in July of 2019 What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. Related PostsFighting For Love – Even When It’s HardHow I Responded When My Spouse Confessed Attraction for Someone ElseHow to Parent Together When You’re Total OppositesThe Best Defense against “Hook-up Culture” is a Good OffenseWhat Could Have Ruined Our Marriage

Your strong-willed child is refusing to choose. You are offering two choices, just like you’ve learned. “Give your child some choices,” they said. “It will help them feel some control,” they said. But your child just stamps their foot and refuses to choose. You asked. We answered! Everyday we receive pressing questions about a wide range of parenting topics. We consider it a privilege to walk this journey with those who are experiencing some of the most challenging aspects of discipline and parent-child connection. And we love to answer listener questions! During the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course, parents ask questions in a moderated format. We wanted to bring some of these questions (and their answers!)  to you, our podcast community! Stacy Bellward (moderator for our Discipline That Connects online course)  is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Jim and Lynne answer some of the most frequently asked listener questions we hear in our online courses and beyond. This is the second episode in a two-part series. You’ll definitely want to hear the answers to these questions! In this episode we answer the questions: “How do I remain patient with my strong-willed and stubborn child refuses to choose? I feel like I am going to lose it!”“Both my 15-month-old and 5-year-old are hitting other kids when they don’t get what they want. How should I respond?”“What are the strengths underneath my child’s misbehavior?”“How do I help my child learn to make it right?” (Coaching kids to think wisely in discipline situations, or when they’ve hurt someone.) It has not been an easy season of parenting. We would love to support you in making the tweaks that will bring lasting change! Join Stacy Bellward and hundreds of other parents from around the world for our upcoming Discipline That Connects online course. This course is offered only twice a year. Join us today! Registration closes on Feb 8th.  Mentioned in this podcast: Meet Kara who Lives in Thailand (child struggling with choices mentioned in podcast)Book: Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s HeartPhilippians 4:6-7Connected Families Framework for parenting Want to learn more? Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course this winter. Registration closes on February 8th! Download our FREE eBook 4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.​Check out our Connected Families Framework​To get more insight into today’s topic check out: Connecting with Toddler & Teens During Discipline Download our FREE in-depth ebook Helping Kids With Anger. It will provide thoughtful insights and creative ideas to help your struggling child. Related PostsEnjoy Your Children the Way You Always Wanted To | Ep. 44How to Connect with Your Kids in Any Circumstance | Ep. 47The God-Given Gifts in Your Child’s Misbehavior | Ep. 49Want To Know Your Child’s Strengths?

You have work to do and need to move on from playing with your child. They don’t want you to go. And they whine. They fuss. What can you do when your child struggles to transition? You asked. We answered! Everyday we receive pressing questions about a wide range of parenting topics. We consider it a privilege to walk this journey with those who are experiencing some of the most challenging aspects of discipline and parent-child connection. And we love to answer listener questions! Stacy Bellward (moderator for our Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course)  is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Jim and Lynne answer some of the most frequently asked listener questions we hear in our online courses and beyond. This is the first of a two-part series. You’ll definitely want to hear the answers to these questions! In short: Your greatest opportunity to show unconditional love to your child is during a discipline situation!  In this episode we answer the questions: “How can I best calm myself when my child is struggling?”“What should I do when my child hits me?”“How can I make bedtime go more smoothly?”“My child wants to keep playing with me and I have things I have to do. What are some ways I can help them transition?” It has not been an easy season of parenting for many of our listeners, and we would love to support you in making the tweaks that will bring lasting change. Join Stacy Bellward and hundreds of other parents from around the world for our upcoming Discipline That Connects online course. This course is offered only twice a year! (Your kids will thank you!) Mentioned in this podcast: The Connected Families Framework for parentingRomans 5:82 Corinthians 10:5 Want to learn more? Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course.Download our FREE eBook 4 Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.​Check out our Connected Families Framework​To get more insight into today’s topic check out: Safety First: Creating a Culture of Security and Well-Being in Your Home Want to learn more about these concepts? Download our one hour recording of a Discipline That Connects workshop. Related PostsHow to Become an Emotionally Safe ParentHow to Stop Attention-Seeking Behavior Before It StartsThe Small Magnet That is Making a BIG DifferenceTo Spank or Not to Spank?What to Do About the Things Kids Are Scared of At Home | Ep. 40

It takes skill to misbehave! A verbal child often argues with you until you’re exhausted. An emotional child might cry or manipulate. A physical child is more likely to get aggressive or grab something they want. Though it feels frustrating and even counter-intuitive, a shift in attention to your child’s strengths by finding their gift-gone-awry can help. Stacy Bellward is joined by Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families. Together they talk about the third part of the Connected Families framework: You are CALLED and CAPABLE! They discuss the transformational idea of finding the gifts beneath your child’s misbehavior. The challenge for parents is to identify the “gift” within the misbehavior; what we call a “Gift-Gone-Awry.”  In this podcast* Jim and Lynne share: a life-giving vision to reframe your child’s gifts gone awrythe importance of embracing this challenging visionhow Jesus saw and encouraged a gift-gone-awrypractical strategies for identifying, not suppressing, your child’s gifts We also hear from Jessica, an alum from our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course. She shares a practical example of looking for the gift-gone-awry in a tough situation with her son. Before taking the course, her approach to discipline unintentionally communicated to her son, “You are a problem!” Now their relationship has been transformed as she is learning to view her son as someone gifted for God’s good purposes! Want to learn more? Register for our Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart online course.Download our FREE eBook Four Messages Every Child Longs to Hear.Check out our Connected Families Framework Get more insight into today’s topic: 12 Misbehaviors and the Gifts-Gone-Awry Behind Them Frustrated by constant discipline challenges? Take 15 minutes to read our free ebook 4 Messages All Children Long to Hear: A Discipline That Connects Overview. *This podcast originally aired in September of 2019. Related PostsCommunicating Love in the Midst of Misbehavior | Ep. 12Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart | Ep. 15Teaching Kids to Be Responsible for Their Actions | Ep. 14What Does It Mean to Be an Emotionally Safe Parent? | Ep. 11

Recently, we introduced you to Juan and Nita from South Africa. Today, we are excited to bring you a more in-depth interview where they share their heart for their two daughters as well as the 196 children who live in LIV village.  They are learning that demanding respect from children often doesn’t work in the long run. Married for almost 12 years, Juan and Nita are the parents of two children and cross-cultural missionaries in their native South Africa. Listen in as they tell of the exciting work God is doing through the Connected Families’ Discipline That Connect With Your Child’s Heart online course. They have seen transformation not only in their own family, but in the school where they work.  Nita cried out to God for help both in their home, and in the school where they work. God answered her prayer through a friend who introduced her to the Connected Families resources. After using these resources, Nita noticed significant positive changes in the way she parented and related to her children. Juan works at LIV Village with orphaned and vulnerable children who have experienced trauma. He has seen remarkable changes in both himself and the kids through the principles learned in the Discipline That Connects online course. In this episode you will: Hear the story of God’s work through Connected Families in cross-cultural situations. Discover the power of the Gospel in how God parents us. And also get ideas for how we can extend that same grace to our children. Learn how the Connected Families Framework is lived out in practical, everyday life. Mentioned in this episode: Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course The Connected Families Framework Connected Families free resources Ready to dive in and learn more about the Framework? Our 8-session online course, Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart will guide you through each level of the Framework. If you’re looking for a grace-filled way to parent, this course is for you! Parent with Confidence Discipline with Love Take the 8-session online course Discipline That Connects With Your Child’s Heart . REGISTER NOW! Related PostsFear-Based Compliance vs. Heartfelt Obedience: How to Avoid One & Inspire the OtherMeet Juan and Nita from South AfricaMeet a Family of Four from MongoliaThis Is Better Than My Old Consequences for a Disrespectful ChildWhat Causes Anger Issues in a Child? | Ep. 46

As you’re heading into some potentially stressful situations over the next few weeks (changing schedules, relatives who might judge your parenting, or not feeling connected to your kiddos) take some time and listen to this encouraging podcast we pulled out of the archives. (This podcast originally aired in 2015.) Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, were interviewed by Heather MacFadyen of the Don’t Mom Alone podcast (formally God Centered Mom). While some of the scenarios may not be relevant to today (car rides to see relatives, eating in restaurants), they give some really practical tips and scripts that can always be used, whatever the circumstance. With an overview of the Connected Families Framework for parenting, you will feel equipped to keep your cool (and even connect!) with your kids during this time. The strategies and stories discussed will give you a vision for hope-filled holidays. Highlights of their conversation: Why kids can behave better at school/other places and fall apart at home.Helping your kids get through challenging scenarios, like traveling and restaurants.How to connect with your kids when you don’t even like them.Do you feel like relatives might judge your parenting? Learn to recognize your need to get your parents’ approval (the grandparents) when kids misbehave. What to do when you are trying to connect with your child and they are not responding. So, maybe while running errands, wrapping gifts, or folding laundry listen to this interview. You’ll be refreshed, encouraged and challenged. You might even come out on the other side of Christmas with an extra measure of joy! Blessings as you lead your family with grace this holiday season! Mentioned in this podcast: Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course Sibling Conflict online course What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. Related PostsBuilding Wisdom When Kids Want Gifts…and More GiftsChristmas: The Most Wonderful Time of the Year?Family Gatherings | Ep. 16Here’s How to Seize the Opportunity When Your Child Feels DistantTop 4 Tips to Make This the Best Christmas YetWhen Your Child Just HAS To Have That Thing for Christmas…

What do you do when your child gets angry? What causes anger issues in a child? When kids respond with angry, aggressive behavior, stress and fear are often the underlying emotions. Children who have experienced trauma often react with heightened fear responses. In this podcast episode, Jim and Lynne Jackson, co-founders of Connected Families, continue their conversation with Lisa Qualls about parenting kids from hard places. Lisa is the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment. In today’s episode, they talk about the importance of nurturing to connect, attach, and create safety with your child. “When we nurture a child we are really disarming that fear response. We’re bringing them into a calm space where they feel and know that they are precious and loved.” -Lisa Qualls As parents, we can learn to understand our child’s fear and how it affects their body. With some basic tools and preparation, you can work to get ahead of your child’s needs and help them avoid a heightened state of fear. You can bring regulation and calm to your child through thoughtful nurture: bringing them close and meeting their needs.   In this episode you will: hear practical ways to nurture your child, even when they are angry learn how cortisol affects your child’s body discover tools to meet kids’ sensory needs learn how to disarm fear and meet the physical need Mentioned in this episode: The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment Karyn Purvis Institute of Child Development “One Thankful Mom” – Lisa Qualls’ website The Adoption Connection – Lisa Qualls’ podcast Connected Families Comprehensive Sensory Activities List 50 Self-Regulation Activities to Empower Your Child to Calm Related Posts50 Self-Regulation Activities To Empower Your Child To CalmParenting Kids from Hard Places with Unique Needs | Ep. 45Why Is My Child So Angry? The #1 Unexpected Reason & Practical Steps to Take You need consequences that work. You need consequences that work. Because your kids aren’t perfect. Neither are you. That’s why you need a plan for discipling your kids in the hard moments. Read the FREE ebook, Consequences That Actually Work.

Are you parenting a child through adoption or foster care? Are you struggling with bonding to your child or their attachment to you? Your feelings of isolation and discouragement can be very real and overwhelming.  As an adoptive parent, maybe you’ve experienced a heightened sense of grief as you search for answers in unfamiliar parenting territory. If you are looking for practical hope, you will find both solidarity and strategies here for your parenting journey. NOTE: Even if you are not parenting a child through adoption or foster care, we encourage you to take the time to listen. You will undoubtedly begin to understand the complexities your friends who have adopted experience daily.  You may even pick up a few tips that can be applied in your own family! On today’s podcast: Today on the Connected Families Podcast, co-founders Jim and Lynne Jackson interview special guest, Lisa Qualls. Lisa and her husband are the parents of twelve children by birth and adoption. Lisa is the co-author, together with the late Dr. Karyn Purvis, of The Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and Attachment.  As a seasoned biological parent, Lisa did not anticipate the extent of the trauma and intense behavior in her children who joined their family through adoption. While witnessing these extreme behaviors, she watched the foundation of her family begin to crumble. After finding new hope and new resources in Dr. Purvis’ book, The Connected Child, the idea for The Connected Parent was born. This book combines real-life strategies taken from Dr. Karyn Purvis’ knowledge, with experiences from Lisa’s everyday life.  Listen as Jim and Lynne discuss the foundations of the Connected Families Framework with Lisa. Together they also explore the mission of the Karyn Purvis Institute, and the importance of the foundation of safety and attachment. In this episode you will: find hope and guidance in parenting children from hard placesreceive practical ideas for connecting with your struggling childdiscover the power of using “simple scripts” in your parentinghear about the importance of self-calm in becoming a safe parent learn more about the Connected Families Framework  Mentioned in this episode: Connected Families FrameworkThe Connected Parent: Real-Life Strategies for Building Trust and AttachmentKaryn Purvis Institute of Child Development“One Thankful Mom” – Lisa Qualls’ websiteThe Adoption Connection – Lisa Qualls’ podcast Related PostsAdapting Christmas…for children who joined your family through adoptionDoes Giving Time Outs Actually Help Your Child?My Misconceptions About Adoption—And, Well, All Parenting Learn more about the Framework Want to dig deeper into Connected Families’ Parenting Framework? Get our FREE ebook, What Kids Need: 4 Messages That Build Identity.

Are you scrambling to find clarity and help in your parenting? Are you struggling to find practical tools that bring lasting change? Do you wish you enjoyed your children more? Discover the power of connection and the hope of restoring a more peaceful relationship with your child! How one mom learned to enjoy her children Today’s guest is Emily, an alum of the Discipline That Connects with Your Child’s Heart online course. Emily and her husband have three boys. They experienced many of the typical challenges parents often face, as well as a rough transition in the adoption of their third son. The stress of this transition was causing intense behavior in her children, and Emily knew she needed a different way to discipline than the way she had disciplined prior to their adoption. After hearing from friends who attended a workshop led by Jim and Lynne Jackson, Emily knew this was the way she wanted to parent. She signed up for the DTC online course, and discovered the power of the Connected Families framework. In the course she learned the importance of self-evaluation: “What’s  going on in me as a parent?” She also gained a more empathetic view of her children, and found that the way God relates to us can inspire how we connect with our children. Instead of trying to fix her kids’ behavior, Emily began using wisdom to guide her children toward the gifts that God instilled in them. She saw her children soften toward her, and toward the message of the gospel of Jesus’ love. Bringing God’s grace to your parenting Join Stacy Bellward (DTC course moderator) and Jim Jackson (co-founder of Connected Families), as they share Emily’s story. Everything we do and teach at Connected Families flows through the ideas that we present in this online course. In short: it is a way of parenting that brings God’s grace and truth into the daily interactions with your children.  In this episode you will: Discover how to build a foundation of connectedness and attachment with your child.Learn the importance of finding the gift gone awry; of looking at the gifting beneath the misbehavior, and helping your children use their gifts the way God designed.Hear how the framework can provide unity of vision with your spouse in parenting.Find hope that you can enjoy your children the way you’ve always wanted to. Mentioned in this episode: Ephesians 2:10 What are your parenting strengths? You’ve got them. Knowing your strengths will help you become the best parent you can be. Knowing your parenting challenges is useful information too. Take our FREE ASSESSMENT. Related PostsI Was a Critical Parent: 6 Steps I Took to Find a More Loving WayMy Child Wants Nothing to Do With Me. Is There Hope?To Spank or Not to Spank?Walking in Peace and Joy with Your Kids | Ep. 23Want To Know Your Child’s Strengths?