The Adventure Zone

In this installment, the question isn't 'Will our heroes survive,' it's, 'What's going to kill them first?' Our money's on either the elevator shaft full of sentient vines, or the godlike criminal waiting for them at the top of said shaft. Magnus has an embarrassing pants accident. Taako runs out of juice. Merle goes walking in Memphis.

Our heroes attempt to reconcile with Trent the Treant; a task made difficult by the fact that one of them just cut him in half. After that, buckle up y'all, because it's ELEVATOR TIME. YEEEEAAAAHHHHHH ELEVATORS. Merle befriends a crowbar. Taako does a rope trick. Magnus holds on for dear lives.

In this first chapter in a new Adventure Zone story, Merle, Taako and Magnus are in hot pursuit of a master criminal in the metropolitan city of Goldcliff. Can they stop The Raven before her crime spree tears the town apart? I don't know, because we haven't finished playing this part of the campaign yet. Magnus does some chopping. Taako learns to Nightcrawl. Merle has a genuinely upsetting encounter with some vines.

In this brief interlude between adventures, our heroes attend an office party — well, a carnival — at the Bureau of Balance’s lunar headquarters. They also hit up the Fantasy Costco, where they must match wits with their most fearsome mercantile foe yet. Taako makes a discrete trade. Merle tries on some cool-ass slippies. Magnus finally finds a friend.

In the final chapter in the Rockport Limited story arc, our heroes have little time to stop their runaway train from colliding with Neverwinter, potentially ruining some other group's D&D session. Magnus takes a tumble. Merle channels Gary Sinise. Taako does some pretty dope magical stuff.

In this penultimate chapter in the Rockport Limited murder fiasco, our players deduce the true culprit of the titular heinous crime. Merle runs out of magic. Taako finds more creative applications for Levitation. Magnus gets some fresh air.

The game is afoot! The game of murder-solving, I mean. The game of Dungeons & Dragons has been afoot for a while. Magnus finds unorthodox uses for furniture. Taako practices his interrogation techinques. Merle becomes a robot mom.

As you might have guessed from the title of the past few episodes, our heroes' journey isn't going to be an especially calm one. Because of all the murder, I mean. Taako mourns the dead. Merle finally plays his part. Magnus does one of the absolute coolest punches ever.

Our heroes board their fateful train to Neverwinter, and are rude to just about every single person aboard. Merle strikes out at evangelism. Magnus learns that he may not, in fact, have the biggest muscles. Taako just wrecks some baby carrots.

Our heroes attempt to make the best out of a swampy situation, and race to Rockport before they miss a fateful train. They also meet a beloved radio personality and spokesperson, and hold him ransom for MaxFunDrive donations. Magnus exhibits his upper body strength. Taako gets charming. Merle takes a stink-bath.