Therapy Works

The Agony Aunties tackle a listener's question about managing the stress of a full-time job, parenting two young children, and caring for an ageing parent. They discuss the importance of self-compassion, prioritisation, and setting boundaries without feeling selfish. They suggest considering personal limits and adopting the concept of 'essential maintenance' instead of 'self-care'. Additionally, they emphasise the importance of repairing moments of irritability with children and collaborating with partners to manage household tasks. The episode also references resources such as the 'Motherkind Podcast' and the 'Fair Play' book by Eve Rodsky for better task distribution. More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia’s monthly live webinar: ⁠⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠⁠@juliasamuelmbe ⁠⁠for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life’s challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this fascinating and candid conversation, I speak with Deepa Paul — a Filipino Indian author, mother, wife, and girlfriend about the complexities of love, identity, and open relationships. Deepa shares her experience of a 17-year marriage alongside a 5-year relationship with her boyfriend, reflecting on the different needs these partnerships meet and the honesty required to sustain them. Her book, Ask Me How It Works: Love in an Open Marriage, answers the questions so many are curious about, while challenging misconceptions around polyamory and ethical non-monogamy. We talk about the importance of self-reflection, the “emotional housekeeping” needed to maintain multiple relationships, and the courage it takes to live authentically in the face of cultural expectations and societal judgment. Deepa’s story is one of resilience, curiosity, and a deep commitment to love in its many forms. This is a conversation about freedom, boundaries, and what it really means to build relationships with integrity and care. Find Deepa: Instagram: @storiesbydeepa Book: https://amzn.eu/d/2xGUhRI Website: https://www.storiesbydeepa.com/ More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia’s monthly live webinar: ⁠https://juliasamuel.substack.com/⁠ Follow Julia on Instagram: ⁠@juliasamuelmbe ⁠for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life’s challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: ⁠The Samuel Therapy Practice⁠ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, we address a listener's question on how to talk to children about parental separation. Their answer covers the importance of having the initial conversation together as a family, being honest and age-appropriate, avoiding blame, and reassuring children about the changes and constants in their lives. Key points include practicing the conversation in advance, maintaining a unified narrative, and providing ongoing support. Resources like Cafcass, Gingerbread, and Family Lives are suggested for further support. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this deeply moving episode, I speak with Ben Goldsmith - financier, environmentalist, and father - about the devastating loss of his teenage daughter, Iris, in 2019. Ben shares with great honesty the harrowing moments surrounding her death and the tidal wave of grief that followed. He describes how he turned to nature as a source of solace and strength, and how his connection to the natural world became a lifeline in the darkest times.Our conversation explores the transformative power of grief - how it can break us open, teach us to surrender to life’s mysteries, and ultimately invite us to live with greater presence and meaning. Ben speaks about the enduring imprint Iris has left on his life and how her spirit continues to inspire his renewed passion for rewilding and environmental work. This is an episode about love, loss, and the resilience of the human heart. Ben’s story is painful, yet hopeful, reminding us that from the depths of sorrow, it is possible to find connection, purpose, and even joy again. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at ⁠betterhelp.com/therapyworks⁠ and get on your way to being your best self. Find Ben:Instagram: @bengoldsmith Substack: https://bengoldsmith.substack.com/Book: https://amzn.eu/d/9IQTFpX More from Therapy Works:Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia’s monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life’s challenges.If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this week’s Agony Aunties, we answer a listener’s question about social anxiety returning in midlife. We talk about why it can resurface — from life transitions to physical changes — and share gentle, practical ways to manage it, from planning ahead to leaning on allies. Above all, it’s about self-compassion and staying connected. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, I talk with Lucy Gossage — oncologist, former professional triathlete, ultra-runner, and co-founder of the Move Against Cancer charity. From winning Ironman races to conquering Britain’s gruelling Spine Race, Lucy has built her life around challenge and growth.She speaks candidly about facing fear and failure, the heartbreak of betrayal, and the process of finding closure. We explore how adventure, deep friendships, and joy can help us recover and move forward.Drawing on her work in oncology, Lucy also shares profound lessons from her patients about resilience, connection, and what truly matters in life.This conversation is about courage, adversity, and the choice to live fully — with all the risks and rewards that entails.Find Lucy: Instagram: @lucygossageMore from Therapy Works:Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia’s monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life’s challenges.If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode, the Agony Aunties return to address a listener's question about the often confusing advice regarding feeling emotions versus avoiding negative self-talk. They explain that emotions should be acknowledged and processed, whereas negative self-talk should be identified, challenged, and dialled down. They discuss mindfulness techniques, the importance of self-awareness, and how our body and mind interact in this process. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, I’m delighted to welcome back my friend Elizabeth Day. Elizabeth has done so much to change the way we talk about vulnerability, self-acceptance, and failure - through her writing, her speaking, and of course her brilliant podcast How to Fail. In our conversation, Elizabeth opens up about her personal journey through childlessness and fertility struggles, and how she has found both peace and purpose through her creative life. We talk about her new book, One of Us, and the powerful themes it explores: what it means to belong, how failure shapes us, and why honest connection is essential for our wellbeing. Elizabeth shares with great warmth and insight how writing and her conversations on How to Fail have helped her understand herself and others more deeply. This is a conversation about resilience, creativity, and finding meaning in the places we least expect. I so loved this conversation, and I hope you do too.  If you’d like to try BetterVits, you can get 15% off sitewide with my code JULIA15 at⁠ ⁠⁠bettervits.co.uk/discount/Julia15⁠. I’m keen to hear your thoughts! Find Elizabeth: Instagram: @elizabday Website: https://www.elizabethday.org/ Substack: theelizabethday.substack.com Buy her new book One of Us: https://amzn.eu/d/5IZTy96 More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia’s monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/ Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life’s challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing - it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations. If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this Agony Aunties episode, we answer a listener asking how to co-parent after a breakdown of trust. We focus on steadying yourself to steady your child, keeping them out of adult conflict while keeping communication open and age-appropriate, and putting clear, written boundaries in place - a simple parenting plan, predictable handovers, and one co-parenting app for all logistics. We suggest shared reading to build a common language, leaning on a small support team (friend, therapist, mediator), and simple self-care so you can be consistent. The aim is a workable, child-centred plan that protects secure relationships with both parents. If safety is a concern, please seek professional and legal support. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In this episode of Therapy Works, I have the privilege of speaking with Grace Spence Green - a junior doctor and wheelchair user whose life changed dramatically after a spinal cord injury caused by a traumatic accident. Grace shares with such honesty the physical and psychological challenges she faced during her rehabilitation, and how she has learned to navigate the daily realities of life in an able-bodied world. What shines through is her remarkable courage, her ability to redefine her own story, and her deep commitment to disability justice movements. We talk about the importance of community support, the role of radical acceptance in finding peace, and how she continues to build a fulfilling life and career as a doctor. Grace also speaks about her relationships, her writing, and her advocacy for better understanding and treatment of disabled individuals. I hope you find Grace’s story as moving and inspiring as I did.  If you’d like to try BetterVits, you can get 15% off sitewide with my code JULIA15 at⁠ ⁠⁠bettervits.co.uk/discount/Julia15⁠. I’m keen to hear your thoughts! Find Grace: Instagram: @gracesg Buy Her Book: To Exist As I Am by Grace Spence Green | Waterstones To Exist As I Am a book by Grace Spence Green - Bookshop.org UK TO EXIST AS I AM by Grace spence Green is published by Profile, £16.99 hardback. Support Links: Radical Acceptance in DBT — overview of the skill discussed in the episode: https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/distress-tolerance/radical-acceptance/ ADHD UK: https://adhduk.co.uk/ National Autistic Society: https://www.autism.org.uk/ More from Therapy Works: Subscribe to the Therapy Works Substack for guidance on everyday struggles and access to Julia’s monthly live webinar: https://juliasamuel.substack.com/ Follow Julia on Instagram: @juliasamuelmbe for tips, tools, and conversations about navigating life’s challenges. If you enjoy this episode, please consider rating, reviewing, and subscribing — it makes a big difference and helps others discover these conversations.If you need help finding a therapist, visit: The Samuel Therapy Practice Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices