Coaching Culture

This episode, featuring hosts J.P. Nerbun, Nate Sanderson, and Betsy Buttrick, tackles the significant challenge of leading other adults in a coaching context, whether as a head coach, athletic director, or club administrator.The conversation begins with an anecdote about Washington Commanders' Head Coach Dan Quinn, who started his tenure by having every staff member, including himself, deliver a personal PowerPoint presentation about their life to build a strong "coach culture". The hosts discuss the common barriers that prevent leaders from effectively leading their adult staff, such as fear of conflict, the limited pool of willing coaches (volunteers), and the assumption that adults "should know better".A central theme is the difficulty of holding coaches accountable to a set standard, an issue that often stems from the leader's own discomfort with confrontation (conflict aversion) and a lack of established processes for staff development and accountability. The discussion shifts from the mindset of being a "manager" with power over others to being a "leader" who works with their staff to co-create and uphold a shared culture. The episode concludes with practical advice and tools for leaders to intentionally lead their staff, emphasizing that coaches, like athletes, want to be led and supported.Sign up for the weekly newsletter https://www.tocculture.com/newsletter.Join TOC Coach for FREE! https://www.skool.com/toccoach/aboutLink to schedule a call for the free Coaching Culture Audit and to inquire about group pricing for TOC Coach. https://api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/bookings/toccoachdiscoveryBetsy Buttrick: https://betsybutterick.com/Previous Relevant Episodes (Links): Links to episodes which also discuss leading coaches and building culture.370: Onboarding Coaches https://open.spotify.com/episode/2ARjMZN3Ru88rCjmmhVZwm?si=ccc5riIlSUyliKoYZtG3qQ 185: Creating Staff Alignment https://open.spotify.com/episode/48zsWR7DD5L1kbd6SPy3ph?si=0bWQoOH0Q5agKGZwEROz1A84: Getting the Most out of your Coaches https://open.spotify.com/episode/7JVZN3005xmE6KE2QQvh5M?si=mUhi25rTSj2UM1GXFVw56g 

Part 2 of the conversation with Shane Sowden, Head Men's Basketball Coach at Briarcrest College, focuses on his commitment to deep, transformational relationships with his athletes, moving beyond a purely transactional coaching style. He discusses the importance of caring candor and brutal honesty with his players, even when it's difficult.A major theme is the value of investing time in players off the court to build genuine connections, which he finds improves performance on the court as a high "return on investment". This includes one-on-ones, asking non-basketball questions, sharing his own story as a college athlete, and creating unique team environments.Finally, Sowden reflects on the advice he'd give his younger self, emphasizing that a coach's worth doesn't come from the scoreboard. True success is measured by the impact on a player's life at ages 35, 40, and 45—living out the program's values as a spouse, parent, and community leader.Join TOC COACH: https://www.skool.com/toccoach/aboutSubscribe to the Newsletter: https://www.tocculture.com/newsletter

Coach Shane Sowden reflects on his team's amazing season and shares that the most significant part wasn't the "storybook ending," but the individual stories of self-sacrifice and putting the team first that created the foundation for success. He contrasts his sense of fulfillment and meaning with the "emptiness" often felt after reaching the pinnacle of achievement.The core of the discussion centers on a pivotal turning point two and a half years prior, during a difficult season, where Sowden realized he needed to be his authentic self as a coach. Sowden also shares how embracing vulnerability and a collaborative approach—including asking players for their input on strategy and their perception of him at his best (which was when he was confident) —helped him connect with his team and fostered an environment of trust. The episode concludes with a discussion on the importance of self-leadership and consistency in modeling values for players, especially during difficult times.Join TOC COACH: https://www.skool.com/toccoach/aboutSubscribe to the Newsletter: https://www.tocculture.com/newsletter

Is "belonging" enough for today's athlete? According to the coaches at The Coaching Culture Podcast, the answer is a resounding No.In this complex and highly relevant episode, hosts J.P. Nerbun, Nate Sanderson, and Betsy Butterick dive into the crucial difference between a player feeling like they simply belong (fitting in culturally) and feeling like they matter (being essential to the team's success).   We unpack the toughest challenge coaches face: managing multi-tiered rosters (Freshman, JV, Varsity) and moving players between levels. This is where culture, development, and winning all collide.   You will learn:Why the desire to feel you matter is now greater than the desire to feel you belong.   How to shift your language from "sending players down" to creating a culture of intentional development.   A brilliant team activity (Playing Time Case Studies) to expose your athletes to the complexity of your coaching decisions.   How to empower your team leaders (captains) to "coach the transition" for new and promoted players.   Where the coach's responsibility ends and the athlete's responsibility for their own drive and development begins.   Stop focusing only on who plays and start focusing on how everyone contributes. This episode is essential listening for any coach, parent, or leader dealing with the daily realities of team dynamics and playing time.➡️ Get the full notes & resources from this episode: https://www.tocculture.com/newsletter➡️ Ready for a better culture? Join the community: https://www.skool.com/toccoach/about➡️ Gaping Void Article: https://www.gapingvoid.com/why-does-mattering-matter/➡️ Betsy Butterick's Website: https://betsybutterick.com/

Ready to transform your team culture from the inside out?In Part 2 of our deep dive into coaching, we sit down with executive coach Zafer Achi to unlock the developmental secrets behind high-performing teams. Forget the surface-level talk about team building; Zafer offers a fresh, advanced perspective on the four universal team challenges: Trust, Conflict, Accountability, and Failure.This isn't just theory—it's a coaching masterclass on how to move your team from being "subject to" their old habits to gaining the perspective (the "object" view) needed for genuine growth and success. Whether you're a sports coach, CEO, or team manager, you'll walk away with a richer understanding of the human dynamics that truly drive performance.🔥 Episode Highlights: What You'll LearnTrust is Not What You Think It Is: Discover why "trust" is a complex, multi-layered concept and how your team members' differing personal definitions (is it about reliability? is it about openness?) can create friction or synergy. Learn the crucial conversation you must have to build a unified foundation.The Law of Three in Conflict: Stop oscillating between easy agreement and outright fighting. Zafer introduces the concept of the Reconciling Force—the higher possibility that transcends simple opposition—to turn team disagreements into opportunities for collective growth and invention.The Three Faces of Accountability: Are your team's metrics killing its spirit? Find out why the highest form of accountability isn't hitting numbers, but embracing "continuous experimentation and learning," especially in volatile environments. Learn how to choose the right definition for the right task.The Right Kind of Wrong: In the arena of failure, where most teams lose, you'll learn to distinguish between blameworthy mistakes (negligence) and praiseworthy failures (pushing the growth edge). Zafer explains why, for a team to truly improve, falling down must be an intrinsic part of the process.The Joy Factor: Ultimately, Zafer shares his most important purpose: bringing joy, fluidity, and playfulness into the team experience, transforming the time spent at work or on the field into something truly life-giving.Don't just run plays—develop people. Listen now and start building a team capable of navigating complexity, not just winning the next game.Find more from Zafer Achi at Cultivating Leadership: https://www.cultivatingleadership.com/team-member/zafer-achi

STOP Leading Backwards! Transform Your Coaching from the "Dance Floor" to the "Balcony" with Executive Coach Zafer AchiEver feel like you’re doing everything right—you've got the technical expertise, the tools, the game plan—but your team still feels disconnected? You're not alone. In this electrifying episode, we dive deep with Zafer Achi, a veteran executive coach and Co-Chair of Cultivating Leadership, who reveals the single biggest mistake most leaders and coaches make: trying to lead others before truly knowing and leading themselves.Zafer breaks down his own powerful journey from being a technically brilliant leader who puzzled his teams ("We don't know who he is") to becoming a master of developmental coaching. This isn't just theory; this is the tactical framework you need to accelerate growth—both for yourself and your athletes/team members.What You'll Discover in This Must-Listen Episode:The "Backward" Leadership Trap: Why focusing on team management and technical fixes before self-awareness leaves your team feeling unheard and generates "scar tissue."Trust vs. Transparency: The crucial difference between sharing everything you know and sharing who you are—and why only one builds deep trust and connection.The Player-Coach Mindset: Learn the game-changing metaphor of the "Balcony and the Dance Floor" (coined by Ron Heifetz) and how to instantly shift from being caught up in the action to observing the dynamics.Free Yourself from Rigid Beliefs: Discover how to identify values and principles you are "subject to" and learn the profound liberation that comes from holding them as options for choice.The 3 Pillars of Self-Awareness: Zafer reveals the simple, daily practices (mirrored by top performance psychologists) that leaders can use to "take the balcony on their inner life."Turbocharge Team Development: Find out why a functional team is actually the ultimate accelerator for individual growth and how to structure collective "Balcony Moments" that metabolize conflict and unlock collective potential.Whether you're a sports coach, a CEO, or a team captain, this conversation is your blueprint for moving beyond the mechanics of leadership to the mastery of human development. Hit play and start leading from the Balcony!🔗 Guest Link: Learn more about Zafer Achi and his work at Cultivating Leadership. https://www.cultivatingleadership.com/team-member/zafer-achi

🎙️ Can't Connect with Today's Athletes? You're Not Alone! | Communication Specialist Betsy Butterick on Coaching Gen Z & Gen Alpha 🤯Are you a coach feeling the fatigue? Do terms like "entitled" and "soft" sneak into your conversations about your team? You are experiencing the generational shift that is pushing coaches out of the profession, and this episode is your urgent, actionable roadmap back to success and joy.   We sit down with Communication Specialist and "The Coaches' Coach," Betsy Butterick, to discuss her transformative new book, Kids These Days. Betsy unpacks why the old ways of coaching are no longer effective and how you can bridge the widening gap with Gen Z and Gen Alpha athletes without sacrificing your standards.   Here’s a sneak peek at what you'll learn in this must-listen episode:🔥 Why Coaching Feels Impossible Right Now: It's "One More Thing" Fatigue: Coaches are drowning in responsibilities outside of the sport, and connecting with modern athletes feels like the final straw.   The Blame Trap: How fixating on "Kids These Days" or "Coaches These Days" as the problem prevents any real solutions.   The Technology Chasm: Why athletes today are fundamentally different from previous generations, and how the internet has shaped their expectations and development in ways you might not realize.   💡 Game-Changing Shifts for Modern Coaches: From Accommodation to Collaboration: Stop feeling like you have to accommodate every demand. Learn how to master the art of co-creation, which is key to boosting engagement, ownership, and accountability.  It’s Not Impossible, It’s Unpracticed: The skills you think athletes should have are simply unpracticed. Discover your incredible opportunity to use sport to teach them how to "do hard better".   The Power of Asking: The best coaches at every level avoid lectures and use strategic questions to effectively reach and teach the modern athlete. We break down the subtle language shift you need to make today to avoid athlete conflict.   🛠️ Action Items for Leaders: How to Level Set Expectations to reduce conflict and increase the likelihood of success before the season even starts.  Why Self-Reflection is the necessary first step—if you don't know your own triggers and resistance, no strategy will work.   Whether you coach a high school team, an elite college program, lead in the boardroom, or are simply raising Gen Z/Alpha kids, this episode will transform the way you communicate and connect.   Don't let the joy of coaching fade! Tune in now to learn the essential strategies for success in the modern sports landscape.Get the Book! 📖Kids These Days by Betsy Butterick is available for pre-sale now! Find links and learn more here: https://betsybutterick.mykajabi.com/book-kids-these-days-1-c20fe85a-66a5-414d-ab06-a4f847ba8f29Connect with Betsy: Website: https://betsybutterick.com/Instagram & LinkedIn: https://www.instagram.com/betsy_thecoachescoach/https://www.linkedin.com/in/betsybutterick/

In a world of intense social media messaging and traditional "man box" expectations, how can coaches connect with and lead young male athletes effectively? In part 2 of our conversation with Kip Ioane of Teams of Men to explore a coaching philosophy that goes beyond yelling and wins. Kip shares powerful stories and actionable strategies for using vulnerability as a strength, co-creating a positive team culture, and helping athletes find their authentic selves. This isn't just about coaching a better game—it's about building better men.Kip discusses a new approach to coaching young male athletes that focuses on emotional intelligence and challenging traditional masculinity, often referred to as the "man box." Instead of relying on old-school, aggressive coaching methods, the conversation highlights the importance of fostering self-awareness, creating a safe space for difficult conversations, and empowering athletes to question harmful messages they receive from society, music, and even family members. The episode also explores the power of vulnerability from coaches and the importance of co-creating team culture with the athletes themselves.Learn more about Teams of Men: https://www.teamsofmenmembership.group/Join the TOC Coach Community- Get your 7 Day Free Trial https://www.skool.com/toccoach/aboutSubscribe to the Team Culture Toolbox Newsletter so you don’t miss the notes to this and every episode! https://www.tocculture.com/newsletter Learn More and Apply for the next TOC Coaching Retreat: https://www.tocculture.com/retreat Listen to the Culture Builders Podcast: Youtube | SpotifyInterested in booking TOC for a team meeting/consultation? Click here→ https://www.tocculture.com/contactTOC Coaching & Culture Certification : https://www.tocculture.com/offers/3FEMNae2/checkoutLearn More about TOC and how we can help enhance your coaching experience https://www.tocculture.com/Learn More about Besty Butterick and her work with coaches! https://betsybutterick.com/Follow Us On Social MediaSubstack: https://substack.com/@jpnerbuntocInstagram- https://www.instagram.com/tocculture/ TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@tocculture Youtube- https://www.youtube.com/@tocculture

Join us for a powerful conversation with Kip Ioane, founder of Teams of Men, as he shares his journey from basketball coach to advocate for a new vision of masculinity. Triggered by a series of unsettling incidents, Kip realized that traditional coaching methods weren't enough to prepare young men for the real world.In this episode, we dive into the concept of the "man box"—the rigid set of societal expectations that can leave men feeling lonely, angry, and isolated. Kip explains how coaches can use their unique platform to challenge these harmful norms, not by adding more to their plate, but by shifting their focus.Join the TOC Coach Community- Get your 7 Day Free Trial https://www.skool.com/toccoach/aboutSubscribe to the Team Culture Toolbox Newsletter so you don’t miss the notes to this and every episode! https://www.tocculture.com/newsletter Learn More and Apply for the next TOC Coaching Retreat: https://www.tocculture.com/retreat Listen to the Culture Builders Podcast: Youtube | SpotifyInterested in booking TOC for a team meeting/consultation? Click here→ https://www.tocculture.com/contactTOC Coaching & Culture Certification : https://www.tocculture.com/offers/3FEMNae2/checkoutLearn More about TOC and how we can help enhance your coaching experience https://www.tocculture.com/Learn More about Besty Butterick and her work with coaches! https://betsybutterick.com/Follow Us On Social MediaSubstack: https://substack.com/@jpnerbuntocInstagram- https://www.instagram.com/tocculture/ TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@tocculture Youtube- https://www.youtube.com/@tocculture

You’ve heard the quote, "By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail," but how much time do you spend preparing your team's culture? In this episode, hosts JP Nerbun, Nate Sanderson, and Betsy Butterick break down why an intentional plan for your culture is just as critical—if not more so—than your tactical systems. They reveal the biggest excuses coaches use to avoid this essential work and share actionable strategies to build a strong foundation. Learn how to align your staff, connect with your athletes on a deeper level, and proactively engage with parents to create a culture that can withstand the pressures of a long season.3:06 - Common Obstacles7:26 - Top 3 Foundational Practices11:58 - The Power of Expectations14:55 - Co-Creating Standards21:11 - The Dream Manager25:58 - Engaging Sports ParentsJoin the TOC Coach Community- Get your 7 Day Free Trial https://www.skool.com/toccoach/aboutSubscribe to the Team Culture Toolbox Newsletter so you don’t miss the notes to this and every episode! https://www.tocculture.com/newsletter Learn More and Apply for the next TOC Coaching Retreat: https://www.tocculture.com/retreat Listen to the Culture Builders Podcast: Youtube | SpotifyInterested in booking TOC for a team meeting/consultation? Click here→ https://www.tocculture.com/contactTOC Coaching & Culture Certification : https://www.tocculture.com/offers/3FEMNae2/checkoutLearn More about TOC and how we can help enhance your coaching experience https://www.tocculture.com/Learn More about Besty Butterick and her work with coaches! https://betsybutterick.com/Follow Us On Social MediaSubstack: https://substack.com/@jpnerbuntocInstagram- https://www.instagram.com/tocculture/ TikTok- https://www.tiktok.com/@tocculture Youtube- https://www.youtube.com/@tocculture