Are you setting goals for yourself but can’t seem to finish them? In this episode, we explore one of the major reasons why we can’t seem to finish the task we started, the concept of decluttering and creating space in your life to achieve your state of Zen. Don’t miss this episode!

In today's episode, we will be interviewing stand-up comedian Brendon Lemon who is also a proponent of Zen and Stoic philosophy. Don't miss this episode!

Are you someone who has a packed schedule yet feels like you're not really "doing" anything? Do you purposefully wear your "busyness" as your badge of honor? In this episode, we will discuss the importance of finding clarity and direction because if we don't know where we're going, no matter which direction we put our sails, no wind is favorable.

In this episode, we're going to be discussing the Chinese proverb "If you are always giving, then you will always have." I will be telling the story of how a homeless man named Paul taught me one of the greatest lessons of my life.

     Important Quotes:“We are a meaning-seeking species. We tend to process events in light of what they mean to us. We make a value judgment: Is it good or bad in the context of my life? And it is a human habit to infer deliberate intention to events in self-referential ways.” - Ralph Lewis“Our guilt festers and turns into shame. It becomes something horrifying and gross and must be concealed and defended from anyone who would otherwise expose it. And it’s this hiding that ultimately hurts us. Because what this hiding looks like in real life is a deflection of responsibility. It looks like passive aggression. It looks like manipulation and unwillingness to trust. It corrodes and poisons our relationships and destroys our ambitions. And as any addict will tell you, overwhelming amounts of shame can slowly murder us from the inside-out." - Mark Manson“You (hopefully) don’t go around sleeping with your friends’ partners and shitting in supermarket aisles because you fear social punishment. And that is a healthy fear—that threat of feeling ashamed keeps you, your genitals, and your bowels in check. While shame functions to keep you from doing stupid or awful things, guilt similarly motivates us to right our wrongs. When we feel guilty about something, we often set out to make it right. We apologize and in some cases, we offer ways to fix it. This feels bad. But this is also healthy. Expressing guilt for our transgressions and setting a course of corrective action shows others that:1. We know the rules and we know we broke them, and2. We care about others in the group enough to try to fix things.In short, shame and guilt solve a big problem inherent to living in larger social groups: they help regulate the behavior of the entire group at the level of the individual." -Mark MansonKey Takeaways:Guilt often can arise from making promises we know we cannot keep just to appease someone.It is our own guilt that haunts our minds and makes us seek out confirmation in our environment.References:Banishing A Ghost: https://truecenterpublishing.com/zenstory/ghost.htmlComing to Terms With Coincidence: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/articles/202002/coming-terms-coincidenceThe Best Way to Resolve Your Shame: https://markmanson.net/shame

Important Quotes:"All the difficulties you have in zazen should not take place outside your mind. Your efforts should be kept within your mind. In other words you have to accept the difficulty as not being other than what you are." -Shunryu Suzuki Roshi“Dogen Zenji was enlightened when he heard his master strike and say to the disciple sitting next to Dogen, "What are you doing? You have to make a hard effort. What are you doing?" That effort is Zen. That effort is to observe the precepts. If we make our best effort on each moment with confidence, that is enlightenment. When you ask whether your way is perfect or not, there is an insidious idea of self. When you do your best to observe the precepts, to practice Zen, within the Big Mind then there is enlightenment. There is no special way to attain enlightenment. Enlightenment is not some certain stage. Enlightenment is everywhere. Wherever you are, enlightenment is there. Whatever you do with your best effort, enlightenment follows. This is very important for our Zen practice and for our everyday life. We should make our best effort in our everyday life as well as in practice of Zen.” -Shunryu Suzuki Roshi“In today’s standard, hustle culture can be defined as the state of overworking to the point where it becomes a lifestyle.” -Afrina ArfaKey Takeaways:Imagine a what your day would look like in flow. Would it be all work and no play, or all play and no work? You’ll find the answer is neither. There is a harmony between the two that occurs when you’re in flow. A harmony between purpose driven thinking, and a purposeless ease of just being. If you swing the pendulum towards all things being purposeful and productive, you’ll fall prey to overworking or overtraining. If you swing the pendulum towards all things being pleasurable and fun, you’ll eventually run into the existential crisis of meaninglessness. Aim at the sweet spot that respects the value of both in your life.Too much of a challenge leads to perfectionism and fear of failure. To easy of a goal leads to apathy.Failure in a serious and rigid state, feels painful. It sucks to be wrong when you give too much significance to anything. When you fail in a playful state, you laugh, you learn, and you move on.References:Joe Rogan - How To Workout Smarter: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_fbCcWyYthQ&t=669sThe Flow Model: https://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/flow-model.htmAlan Watts - How To Create Without Forcing: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VhNRpiY1Lc0Right Effort in Practice: http://www.chzc.org/SR6.htmWhy Are Young People Pretending to Love Work?: https://www.nytimes.com/2019/01/26/business/against-hustle-culture-rise-and-grind-tgim.htmlThe Truth About the Hustle Culture: https://university.taylors.edu.my/en/campus-life/news-and-events/news/the-truth-about-the-hustle-culture.htmlEvery Inspirational Video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mSYJ5Ehbo3U

Important Quotes:“Buddhism is about liberating the mind. To accomplish this, the Buddha taught his path of morality (sīla), concentration (samādhi) and wisdom (paññā).”“A life grounded in morality is a life free from restlessness and remorse as a result of regret.”“Just as in the entire Buddhist path, when it comes to the precepts the Buddha emphasises the underlying intention. This does not mean that you can invoke ignorance or inattention to justify misconduct. You cannot say that you knew well or did not know better and that it was moral. Much more it means that your consciousness is the forerunner of your actions and that the consequences of your actions follow, as the Dhammapada (verse 1) nicely states:‘Mind is the forerunner of all things, mind is their leader, they are made by the mind. When someone speaks or acts with impure thoughts, suffering follows, like the wheel follows the hoof of the ox.’ “ -Editors at Buddho.org “When your mind becomes demanding, when you long for something, you will end up violating your own precepts: not to tell lies, not to steal, not to kill, not to be immoral, and so forth. If you keep your original mind, the precepts keep themselves.” - Shunryu Suzuki“We should be very grateful to the rigid formal way of practicing Zen and Zen precepts. You may think these precepts are useless if we cannot observe them perfectly. But they are the traces of human efforts based on the great mercy of Buddha.” -Shunryu Suzuki“Lies make you weak and you can feel it. You cannot get away with warping the experience of being.” -Jordan Peterson“Men have come into being for one another; so either educate them or put up with them.” -Marcus AureliusKey Takeaways:The 5 PreceptsNot to destroy lifeNot to take what is not givenAbstain from exploiting my passionsAbstain from false speechAbstaining from intoxicationThese are not commandments or moral law laid down by some kind of cosmic law giver.They are vows. They are not going to make you into a good person, they are not intended to be sentimental.Imagine what the world would look like if we put our best effort forth to observe and practice these precepts. What would it be like if we all adopted Marcus Aurelius’s attitude of fellowship?The best way for us to get things done and get the most out of our experiences is to work together. The foundation of the quality of our efforts towards meaningful ends begins with our own morality with how we treat ourselves and others.References:Alan Watts: The Real Eightfold Path: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vi0axKhWgv0&t=684sBuddhism and Morality: the Five Precepts: https://buddho.org/buddhism-and-morality-the-five-precepts/?gclid=Cj0KCQjw5oiMBhDtARIsAJi0qk2dD52I2KLW7l7ZqKj0XY5EiJ9WHXmzjquusXDIcSCV7cW2fETpStYaAqEkEALw_wcBRule 8: Tell The Truth or At Least Don't Lie | Jordan Peterson: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n53HmC1zxVcMarcus Aurelius on Overcoming Anger and Developing Empathy: https://donaldrobertson.name/2013/02/25/marcus-aurelius-on-overcoming-anger-and-developing-empathy/Right Effort in Practice: http://www.chzc.org/SR6.htmMarcus Aurelius’ Ten Commandments to Himself: https://medium.com/stoicism-philosophy-as-a-way-of-life/marcus-aurelius-ten-commandments-to-himself-681a775fae84Dave Chappelle: Chip The White Guy Part 2: https://youtu.be/MkQGRup3E8M

Important Quotes:    "The goal of practice is always to keep your beginner’s mind. Our original mind includes everything within itself. It is always rich and sufficient with itself. You should not lose your self-sufficient state of mind. This does not mean a closed mind, but actually an empty mind and a ready mind. If your mind is empty, it is always ready for anything; it is open to everything." -Shunryu Suzuki“There is another way—a middle way, between too much and not enough confidence. This Goldilocks zone of confidence is where rational beliefs meet reality. It is fundamentally based on truth and good sense. It is built on beliefs that can be justified by evidence and honest self-examination. It steers between the perilous cliff of overconfidence and the quicksand of underconfidence. It is not always easy to find this narrow path; it takes honest self-reflection, level-headed analysis, and the courage to resist wishful thinking. This middle way is not the path to mediocrity—far from it. It is exceptionally rare to be well-calibrated in one’s confidence.[10] It requires that you understand yourself and what you are capable of achieving. It requires that you know your limitations and what opportunities are not worth pursuing. It requires that you act confidently based on what you know, even if it means taking a stand, making a bet, or speaking up for a viewpoint that is unpopular. But it also requires the willingness to consider the possibility that you are wrong, to listen to evidence, and to change your mind. This is a rare combination of courage and intellectual humility, which leads to actively open-minded thinking. It takes just the right amount of confidence.” -Don A. Moore“When you must write something to your friend, grammar will tell you what words you should write; but whether you should write or not, grammar will not tell you. And so it is with music as to musical sounds; but whether you should sing at the present time and play on the lute, or do neither, music will not tell you. What faculty then will tell you? That which contemplates both itself and all other things. The rational faculty; for this is the only faculty that we have received which examines itself, what it is, and what power it has, and what is the value of this gift and examines all other faculties” -Epictetus Key Takeaways:Being intentional requires the use of the rational faculty. To point back to your own humanity and find inner peace requires intentionality and mindfulness     Closing ourselves off to learning intends a sense of control.Even in areas we have achieved mastery in, we are all beginners in an unexplored context. Seek understanding through curiosity. Control will close our minds and stunt our development.     It can be scary to examine your intentions for doing things, to let go of control, and be a beginner again. Have compassion for yourself, it’s okay to be scared and feel that way sometimes. Those who most realize their potential in any endeavor are those who always maintain a beginner's mind.References:Overconfidence The mother of all biases: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/perfectly-confident/201801/overconfidenceConcentration: http://users.rider.edu/~suler/zenstory/concentrate.htmlThe Zen Archer: https://www.margiesmessages.com/zenarcher.html

Important Quotes:“The Buddha compares being afflicted with bodily pain to being struck by an arrow. Adding mental pain (aversion, displeasure, depression, or self-pity) to physical pain is like being hit by a second arrow. The wise person stops with the first arrow.” -Bhikku Bodhi“When we’re upset we tend to make events seem more harmful or threatening.   Cognitive therapists describe this as “catastrophizing”. The Stoics question how unbearable pain is by asking themselves whether they’re capable of enduring worse.” -Ryan Holiday“The cave you fear to enter holds the treasure you seek.” - Joseph Campbell “Your pain is a teacher. Resist it no more. Allow it to be the very catalyst that deepens your personal insight and wisdom. Let your pain become the focus of your meditation.” -Brian ThompsonKey Takeaways:Life long Zen meditation practitioners requires a significantly higher level of painful stimulation to feel the same amount of pain to age matched non meditators.Indifference may prevent excessive or unnecessary pain, but it is self love and compassion that allows you to recover from itReferences:- All In The Stance: https://www.washingtonpost.com/archive/lifestyle/wellness/2003/08/26/all-in-the-stance/6a9f6db1-454c-401e-9af1-a0886b58fbeb/- Stoicism and Pain Management: 4 Techniques Practiced By Marcus Aurelius: https://dailystoic.com/stoicism-and-pain-management/- The Zen of Dealing with Chronic Pain: http://www.zenthinking.net/blog/the-zen-of-dealing-with-chronic-pain- Pain Free: A Revolutionary Method for Stopping Chronic Pain: https://www.amazon.com/Pain-Free-Revolutionary-Stopping-Chronic/dp/0553379887/ref=pd_lpo_1?pd_rd_i=0553379887&psc=1- Egoscue Method: https://www.egoscue.com/- A Different Approach To Pain Management: Mindfulness Meditation | Fadel Zeidan | TEDxEmory: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OLQJJDrbj6Q&t=292

  Important Quotes:“For can you find me a single man who cares how he does what he does, and is interested, not in what he can get, but in the manner of his own actions? Who, when he is walking around, is interested in his own actions? Who, when he is deliberating, is interested in the deliberation itself, and not in getting what he is planning to get?” -Epictetus“Hear Epictetus: No one can rob us of our free choice. We must, says he, hit upon the true science of assent and in the sphere of our impulses pay good heed that they are with a “reserve clause”; that they have in view our neighbour’s welfare; that they are proportionate to a thing’s value. And we must abstain wholly from inordinate desire and show avoidance in none of the things that are not in our control.” - Marcus Aurelius“That which holds the mastery within us, when it is in accordance with Nature, is so disposed towards what befalls, that it can always adapt itself with ease to what is possible and granted us. For it is wedded to no definite material, but in the pursuit of its aims it works with a “reserve clause”; it converts into material for itself any obstacle that it meets with, just as fire when it gets the mastery of what is thrown upon it.” -Marcus Aurelius“Though a man may in some sort hinder my activity, yet on my own voluntary impulses and mental attitude no fetters can be put because of the “reserve clause” and their ability to adapt to circumstances. For everything that stands in the way of its activity is adapted and transmuted by the mind into furtherance of it, and that which is a check on this action is converted into a help to it, and that which is a hindrance in our path goes but to make it easier.” -Marcus Aurelius“If your impulse is without an “reserve clause”, failure at once becomes an evil to you as a rational creature. But once you accept that universal necessity, you cannot suffer harm nor even be thwarted. Indeed, nobody else can thwart the inner purposes of the mind. For it no fire can touch, nor steel, nor tyrant, nor public censure, nor anything whatsoever: a sphere once formed continues round and true.” -Marcus Aurelius“The cool thing about dopamine is that it’s very subjectively controlled. We can all learn to secrete dopamine in our brain in response to things in a purely subjective way. If you can reward the process, the brain circuits that are associated with building subjective rewards and dopamine get stronger.” — Andrew Huberman“A practicing Stoic would put all of his strength in reaching the goal — not because of the outcome, but because taking the action is the right thing to do, it goes well with Virtue. The outcome, for a Stoic, is in fact secondary. Which does not change the fact, that the outcome is also a preferred indifferent.” -Rafał Albiński“Most of our troubles are due to our passionate desire for and attachment to things that we misapprehend as enduring entities.” ~Dalai Lama“The “reserve clause” is a way of overcoming emotional pain and as the perfect Sage cannot, by definition, be happy (eudaimon) if he is distressed, then he must act at all times according to this rule.” -Donald RobertsonKey Takeaways:Drivers Seat Goals Vs. Passenger Seat GoalsIf you aim at nothing, you hit nothing.Embrace what is in your control by using it resourcefully, while simultaneously letting go of what you cannot control. Pursue with sincerity of deriving your aims from within. Approach with discipline in HOW you take your action. Measure your success on intentionality not outcome. Keep your mind open by seeking understanding when things don’t go your way.References:Donald Robertson- The Reserve Clause: https://donaldrobertson.name/2013/02/02/action-with-a-reserve-clause-in-marcus-aurelius/Stoic Philosophy Practice: The Reserve Clause Exercise: https://steemit.com/philosophy/@brado/stoic-philosophy-practice-the-reserve-clause-exerciseRethinking the Stoic Reserve Clause: https://medium.com/stoicism-philosophy-as-a-way-of-life/rethinking-the-reserve-clause-b03027cbb1dfThe Secret That High Performers Use to Accomplish Whatever They Want: https://medium.com/swlh/the-secret-that-high-performers-use-to-accomplish-whatever-they-want-9fa577c101bcChange Your BRAIN By Using These Hacks to Increase Your DOPAMINE | Dr. Andrew Huberman: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLORsLlcT48Letting Go of Attachment: From A to Zen: https://tinybuddha.com/blog/letting-go-of-attachment-from-a-to-zen/