Complicated Kids

You can't teach regulation from dysregulation, and today we're talking about why that matters. Marriage and family therapist Matthew Fishleder joins me to talk about one of my favorite topics: regulation for both kids and parents. We unpack why it's impossible to teach self-regulation if we, as adults, aren't regulated ourselves, and how our nervous systems are constantly influencing one another. Matthew explains what's really happening in the brain during a meltdown, and why validation and connection always come before reasoning or discipline. To find out more about Matthew, visit his website at growingpresent.com. About Matthew Fishleder Matthew Fishleder is a marriage and family therapist who helps parents understand regulation, nervous system needs, and what kids are communicating through behavior. Learn more at growingpresent.com. About Your Host, Gabriele Nicolet I'm Gabriele Nicolet, toddler whisperer, speech therapist, parenting life coach, and host of Complicated Kids. Each week, I share practical, relationship-based strategies for raising kids with big feelings, big needs, and beautifully different brains. My goal is to help families move from surviving to thriving by building connection, confidence, and clarity at home. Complicated Kids Resources and Links 🌎 gabrielenicolet.com 📅 Schedule a free intro call: calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session 📺 Subscribe on YouTube: youtube.com/@complicatedkids 👾 Grab Tell the Story (anti-anxiety tool for kids): gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ Instagram: instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ Facebook: facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet 🌺 Free "Orchid Kid" Checklist: raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up Enjoying the show? If Complicated Kids has been helpful, the best way to support the podcast is to follow, rate, and leave a quick review. It helps other parents find the show, and it means a lot. If there's a topic you'd love to hear covered on a future episode, you can always reach out at media@speechkids.com. I love hearing what's on your mind and what would support your family best. Thank you so much for listening and for being part of this community. 💛

One word can change your child's entire education plan. This week's episode reveals the language schools can't ignore. Education attorney and former teacher, Frances Shefter shares about navigating the IEP process with confidence and compassion. I talk with Frances about what she's learned from sitting in all five IEP roles — teacher, coordinator, attorney, and mom — and explains why knowing your rights and using the right language matters. To find out more about Frances by visiting www.shefterlaw.com. About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/

What looks like 'won't' is often just 'can't yet.' And understanding that changes everything. This week I am joined by fellow speech and language pathologist and executive function expert, Tera Sumpter to talk about what's really going on beneath the surface when kids struggle with focus, behavior, or regulation. Tera explains how executive function grows from the roots up, beginning with perception, attention, and working memory. Join us to find out why teaching kids to "pay attention" doesn't work and how directing their attention can lead to connection and learning. To find out more about Tera, visit her website at www.terasumpter.com. About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/

Punishing failure doesn't teach kids to succeed. It teaches them to hide. Executive coach and neurodiversity advocate Jane Singleton joins me to talk about how understanding our brains can change everything. Jane shares her insights from years of helping schools and organizations create more "brain-friendly" systems, and we explore what that looks like in family life, too. Jane offers powerful reminders that self-awareness, compassion, and realistic expectations are the foundations of growth for both parents and kids. To find out more about Jane, visit her website at www.launchpadforlife.org. About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/

Handwriting isn't just about neat letters on a page. It's a critical foundation for learning, memory, and self-expression. Handwriting specialist and founder of Squiggle Squad, Holly Britton joins me as we explore why handwriting is so much more than just putting letters on paper. It's about freeing up working memory so kids can actually learn, think, and express themselves. Holly shares how the lack of explicit handwriting instruction in early education can ripple into challenges with higher-level skills like comprehension, organizing ideas, and even self-expression. We also explore what this means for neurodivergent kids, why typing isn't always a simple substitute, and how intentional, step-by-step teaching can make all the difference. Find out more about Holly and her program by visiting www.squigglesquad.com. About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/

Screens aren't just tools anymore. They're environments where kids live, learn, and connect. But for some, that connection turns into a compulsion that's tough to break. This week I sit down with my friend Ed Spector, a psychologist with tons of experience helping families navigate tech overuse, ADHD, anxiety, depression, and autism. Together, we unpack how heavy use becomes compulsive, why certain kids are more vulnerable, and what harm-reduction strategies really look like in practice. To find out more about Ed, visit his websites at www.spectortherapy.com or https://gamenight.space/ About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/

AI gets a bad rap from some but can be a valuable tool for helping kiddos with learning delays and development issues. Corom Thompson and Elad Ziklik join the Complicated Kids Podcast to explore how AI is being used in creative, deeply personal ways to help children with intellectual and developmental challenges. From Corom's daughter's "digital hamster" who makes bedtime easier, to AI-powered tools that give kids customized social scripts and emotional support, this conversation shines a light on how technology can become an empathetic partner for families. We talk about imagination, consistency, and the real-world ripple effects when kids feel seen, understood, and supported in ways that work uniquely for them. To find out more about Elad and Corom, visit their website at uniqueminds.com. About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/

Mediation can make one of life's hardest transitions less overwhelming for families with kids who need extra care. That's what divorce mediator, Joe Dillon, conveyed when he joined me to talk about what happens when families with complicated kids go through divorce. Joe shares how his own childhood experience shaped his work, why mediation can be a healthier alternative to litigation, and how things like parenting plans, child support, and property division become even more complex when children have developmental or medical needs. We also discuss the importance of stability, creative problem-solving, and putting kids' needs first, even in the midst of major life changes. To find out more about Joe, visit his website at equitablemediation.com. About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/

Growing up autistic brings a perspective that parents, teachers, and therapists can learn so much from. This week, I'm talking with Becca Engle, a special education teacher, book coach, and autistic adult. Becca was diagnosed at age three, found her voice by age five, and has been navigating the ups and downs of life with autism ever since. In our conversation, she shares what made a difference along the way—from the adults who supported her to the moments of real connection that opened doors to learning. We also dig into how assumptions about autism can shape—or limit—a child's future. Becca's story is such a good reminder that every child's journey is different, and that growth doesn't always look the way we think it will. Find out more about Becca on her socials. FB: @becca.engle.02 and @Rebecrafts IG: @re02.20 and @stichesstanzas. About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/

What does it really mean to choose single parenthood by choice? Clinical Social Worker Joanna Strait, shares about the thoughtful, often complex decisions behind creating a family outside of the traditional structure. We explore fertility pressures, the importance of community, the influence of social media, and the empowerment that comes from making intentional choices. To find out more about Joanna, visit her website at www.togetherwelltherapy.com. About your host, Gabriele Nicolet Join Gabriele Nicolet, podcast host, parenting life coach and speech therapist, weekly for practical strategies and tips on raising complicated kids. Learn how to go from surviving to thriving and create a family culture in which every family member can feel valued, seen and heard. With a practical, relationship-based, family-friendly approach, Gabriele provides tools and insights parents need to create a more balanced and fun family life.If you've been listening and wondering what next steps to take to help your child, I am here for you. Maybe you're wondering whether your kiddo needs a speech and language evaluation, or occupational therapy, or some behavioral intervention to deal with picky eating, anger, meltdowns, hitting and biting. With over 20 years of experience, my knowledge of child development and the available options goes deep. Maybe you just want some practical tips on how to get through the day and feel like a better parent. We can unpack that too. Sound good? Learn more at www.gabrielenicolet.com. Complicated Kids Resources and Links: 🌎 www.gabrielenicolet.com 📅Schedule a free intro call at https://calendly.com/gabrielenicolet/free-15-minute-1-1-session. 📺Subscribe to Gabriele's YouTube Channel https://www.youtube.com/@complicatedkids/featured 👾Grab Tell the Story - my powerful anti-anxiety tool for kids https://www.gabrielenicolet.com/tell-the-story ➡️ http://instagram.com/gabriele_nicolet ➡️ http://facebook.com/gabriele.nicolet ➡️ https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabrielenicolet/ 🌺Grab our free checklist to find out if you're raising an Orchid Kid https://www.raisingorchidkids.com/orchid-kid-check-list-sign-up/