Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family

Every parent wants their children to be happy, but it seems children today are more unhappy than ever before! Part of the problem stems from the expectations and pressure on our kids and part of the problem is that most of us don’t recognize the path to happiness ourselves. Dennis Prager states, “Happiness is a moral obligation.”  We all need to realize that happiness is a choice, not something that just happens. We need to teach our children that happiness is under their control, show them the choices that lead to happiness, and then form them with the self-discipline needed to make those choices. We can’t force our children to be happy, but we can give them the guidance and tools they need to choose it for themselves. Find out more about our mission and vision for the future: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/join/

There are few bigger changes in life than going from having no children to having children. After that the next biggest life change is every child that comes after!  Moms and dads who have newborns need the support of family and friends in a particular way as they make these transitions. Grandparents, aunts, uncles, sisters, and even brothers can all listen to this podcast to learn about how they can support new parents at this critical time.  It's good for parents to know that it is important to be honest about the feelings they are having because sometimes expectations do not reflect reality. Being open to life is not easy but it can bring you more joy than anything you've ever done. It can also bring more unity and strength to your marriage if you keep lines of communication open and if you are willing to be vulnerable.     To contact us, and for more information and resources visit us at https://www.messyfamilyproject.org   Event Info: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/speaking/events/

We believe there is a conspiracy afoot in the world against marriage and family life, but it is not a conspiracy of earthly powers; it is a spiritual one.  Parents, by raising a family you have entered into this battle, so you need to keep your eyes open and take spiritual authority within your home and within your own life. In this podcast we discuss things like how the Evil One tries to deceive us, how we can give him footholds in our lives, and how we should respond to his attacks. By freeing yourself up to love, living in the light, and taking authority in our own lives we can live a life spiritual freedom, allowing nothing to hold us back. Remember, Christ the Victor has come to bring us life and it is by His grace and in His name that we shall overcome.  Show links and more info can be found at: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/mfp118-know-your-enemy-spiritual-warfare-for-parents

There are different types of love, but the love that is exclusive, belonging to husbands and wives is eros, a passionate, romantic love which is an essential part of any marriage. As parents we are concerned with so many things - keeping our families financially afloat, the many needs of the children, feeding and clothing everyone - it is easy to neglect to fan the flame of romance between you and your spouse.  In this podcast we give you some encouragement and practical ideas for ways wives can pursue their husbands and how husbands can pursue their wives. We talk about WHY this is important and HOW you can do it better than you are today.   Take Our Listener Survey - https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/MFP2019-podcastsurvey The Four Loves by CS Lewis - https://amzn.to/2LncWyW Love Languages episode - https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/mp-015-love-languages/ Messy Family Minute Weekly Email - https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/sign-up-for-minutes/

St. Francis would tell his followers “Let us begin again for until now we have done nothing.”  This is a great inspiration for us because sometimes we feel like we are always beginning again with new habits, plans, and goals for our family.  We are the most consistently inconsistent parents out there! But we have become less stressed out about our inconsistency because we see that it is an opportunity to begin again with our children.  It is hard to create habits in ourselves, let alone a group of children! But habits are an important part of formation, as the quote above from Stephen Covey shows. Since we have made so many plans with our family, we would like to share with you some of what we have learned in creating habits for your family.  In this podcast we discuss questions such as how do you create appropriate habits for your family? How do you come up with a plan with your spouse? How do you keep those kids motivated?     7 Habits of Highly Effective Families: https://amzn.to/2Zj05l1 The 3 Big Questions for a Frantic Family:  https://amzn.to/2ZgndRj Amazing Camp for Teens: https://cysc.com/ Special weekend in Tampa for couples in February 2020… interested in hearing more? https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/tampa-february-15/

Our society not only devalues mothers, but also underestimates their importance in the life of a newborn child.  Some biologists believe that humans are born too soon because so much formation happens in the first years of life outside the womb.  The essential element in this formation is the mother. No matter how much time a mother spends with her child vs. being in the workplace, the quality of her relationship with her infant is what makes the difference.  In this podcast, we use the book Being There: The Importance of the First Three Years by Erica Komisak as a reference for parents seeking to do all they can to develop a healthy, securely attached, independent child.    Buy this book : https://amzn.to/318grhz Get our messy family newsletter: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/join/ Family Retreat Kit: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/family-retreat-2019-3/   Related shows Every Mother is a Working Mother - https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/mp-046-every-mother-is-a-working-mother/ High Powered Parents - https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/mp-092-high-powered-parents/

Social fragmentation, the break down of the family, isolation, and stress has wounded and broken many of us. Families need to be honest about their need for professional help - honest with themselves and with those around them.  It is a sign of strength to admit weakness! Plus, there are burdens that parents simply cannot carry alone. Marriage counselors, child therapists, 12 Step groups, doctors, and support groups are all resources that families can and should take advantage of in order to function in a healthy, holy way.  Counseling can offer hope, healing, and a path forward. Listen in as we discuss some of the challenges and obstacles, what to look for in a counselor as well as a note on therapy for children.    Dr. Aaron Kheriaty’s A Catholic Guide to Depression - https://amzn.to/2XAWqmF  Mike interview with Dr. Kheriaty for EWTN: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8SIWlQ0ZUqY Article on choosing a good therapist  - https://www.catholiccounselors.com/choosing-a-therapist-a-guide-for-catholics/

Parenting is a path to holiness, that is clear.  Part of this growth in your holiness is taking on the responsibility for the formation of your children.  It's hard to form people! But it is a job for unselfish, dedicated parents and no one can do it better than you can!  In this podcast, we discuss principles that are important to keep in mind as we form our children. Ideas such as your children are not the center of your family, but part of a community; that you need to teach your children to give themselves away; that trust is earned and love requires boundaries.  We pick a few other rules that we have found to be important in our parenting to pass on to you. Along with parenting philosophy will come some very practical insights also that will help you form your children and bring peace to your household.   Family Retreat Kit and Videos: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/family-retreat-2019-3/   Related Episodes and Blog Post: The Irreplaceable Role of Parents (episode): https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/mp-079-the-irreplaceable-role-of-parents/ The Irreplaceable Role of Parents (blog post): https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/the-irreplaceable-role-of-parents/ Growing a Family Culture: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/mp-096-building-a-family-culture-part-1/

During our tour of Australia, we had the opportunity to meet many listeners and make some amazing new friends.  One of our events was a day seminar for engaged and newly married couples with an Australian ministry - The Marriage Project.  During the day, we had a time to take questions from the audience and we loved it! It was great to experience firsthand the desire that these couples had for intentional, authentic relationships with each other and with their greater community.  We answered questions about blending families, challenge of children and marriage, discerning family size, and even our most important piece of advice to a newly married couple (that one was hard!). We hope you enjoy hearing us interacting with our listeners and hearing us really think on our feet!     Catholic Family Fests: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/speaking/events/catholic-family-vacation/ Summer Family Retreat Box: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/summer-family-retreat-box/

“The family is indeed more than any other social reality, the place where an individual can exist ‘for himself’ through the sincere gift of self...it is the ‘sanctuary of life'” ~ St. John Paul II, Letter to Families, #11 This episode is our first LIVE podcast, recorded during our Australian Tour in May 2019.  During this tour, we presented a seminar sponsored by our good friends (Australians, read “mates!” ) at the Marriage Project.  In this talk we examined the question “What is the nature of family?” Society cannot define was this nature is, because society did not give family its nature. Family has a given meaning all its own. According to St. John Paul II, a family is a community of life whose mission it is to guard, reveal and communicate love. It is a man and woman bound together in a life long commitment whose love is fruitful.   Therefore, our understanding of marriage must be seen within the context of family, since not only do we all come from a family, but we are made for family. Survey about future membership site: https://messyfamilypro.wpengine.com/membership/ Join our newsletter (don’t miss out):https://messyfamilyproject.org/contact-us-legacy/subscribe