The Stoic Handbook with Jon Brooks

Send us a textIn today’s Stoic Handbook podcast, I explain my approach to dealing with difficult relationships. Difficult relationships are a source of suffering in many of our lives, and the Stoics were aware of this. Marcus’ Meditations was filled with notes to himself suggesting that he be tolerant and compassionate with others. This is a famous example: When you wake up in the morning, tell yourself: The people I deal with today will be meddling, ungrateful, arrogant, dishonest, jealous and surly. They are like this because they cannot tell good from evil. But I have seen the beauty of good, and the ugliness of evil, and have recognized that the wrongdoer has a nature related to my own - not of the same blood or birth, but the same mind, and possessing a share of the divine. And so none of them can hurt me. No one can implicate me in ugliness. Nor can I feel angry at my relative, or hate him. We were born to work together like feet, hands and eyes, like the two rows of teeth, upper and lower. To obstruct each other is unnatural. To feel anger at someone, to turn your back on him: these are obstructions.— Marcus AureliusIn my personal, Stoicism-inspired approach, I use a 3-code system: Code Yellow = Misaligned Relationships Code Orange = Troubled Relationships Code Red = Toxic RelationshipsEach level of a difficult relationship requires a different approach. What will work with a misaligned relationship could spell disaster for a truly toxic one. I hope this guide helps, and if you have any questions, I’m always happy to provide further clarity on any of the ideas.

Send us a textIn today’s Stoic Handbook podcast I discuss one of my favorite Stoic quotes: “Waste no more time arguing what a good man should be. Be one.”– Marcus AureliusI’m really inspired by this quote, and it brings up a lot of ideas related to the cultivation of self-discipline and overcoming approval addiction. As I explain in the lesson, I find the distinction between “would” vs. “could” to be both a reality check and a motivational device to help us pursue what is most meaningful. 

Send us a textI am a longtime practitioner of martial arts, but my greatest love is Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu. The depth of this practice has truly transformed the way I relate to my body, my “self” and the world around me. But most importantly it has shown me how to learn, and I am fascinated by the overlap between Stoicism and martial arts training. In this episode, I discuss some ways Stoicism can be learned much more efficiently if you approach it more like a martial art than a theoretical framework. 

Send us a textIn this Stoic lesson, I break down Stoic philosopher Epictetus' views on emotions and more specifically, how we can navigate our emotions in an oftentimes cruel and chaotic world. Even though the advice here is simple, it is arguably the most important principle in all of Stoic philosophy. Further reading:https://www.stoichandbook.co/no-event-is-disturbing-or-bad/

Send us a textI recently read one of the best Buddhist meditation books I’ve ever come across. The book is The Mind Illuminated. The author of this book, John Yates, aka Culadassa, has a Ph.D. in neuroscience and over 50,000 hours of meditation practice in the bank. It’s the kind of book that exudes expertise on every page. In the appendix of TMI, Culadassa shares a technique called “The Daily Mindful Review,” which is the best method he has ever discovered for increasing mindfulness in daily life. I went ahead and adapted this to add Stoic elements, and the result is what I consider to be the most powerful guided reflection I’ve ever created. Do this daily, and you will be astounded about the changes you make in the next 30 days. Those changes will include: More mindfulness Less heaviness Better decisions Drastically better relationships Improved habits More compassion And the list goes on… 

Send us a textIn today’s podcast, I explain my approach to learning and why I don’t believe reading books is optimal for truly integrating ideas into our life. Books can be a part of our approach to learning, but only when you already have the framework to make the most from them.If you are not intentional with your reading, you end up merely exposing yourself to ideas without integrating them with your life. 

Send us a textIn today’s Q&A, I discuss a question I had from a Stoic Handbook reader on “pornography addiction.” This is a very important and nuanced topic that I try my best to offer guidance on. I consider pornography addiction to be a “continuum addiction,” meaning there are no clear boundaries around it. This makes it extra problematic compared to more binary-type addictions. This episode will be useful to listeners who have any kind of compulsive behavior. Related posts from The Stoic Handbook:On Aversion and DesireHow to Gain the Powers of a Stoic GodOther Helpful Resources:What would a Stoic say about porn? (Reddit thread)Morning Pages / Daily Journal (Website)Recommended Compassion Meditation (Insight Timer)Your Brain on Porn by Gary Wilson (Book)Atomic Habits by James Clear (Book)The Mind Illuminated by John Yates (Book)Pornography Can Ruin Your Sex Life by Mark Manson (Article)How to Break a Bad Habit by Garry Keller (Article) 

Send us a textIn today’s podcast, I discuss my thoughts on how we can best manage our work-life balance. What I reveal in this lesson will be helpful for any busy people who want to maximize their output while minimizing their stress. Other posts you may want to read: My Insanely Productive Stoic Morning RoutineHow to Turn Stress into TranquilityResources mentioned:Alain de Botton Ted Talk on SuccessEssentialism by Greg McKeownBill of RightsBoundaries by Henry Cloud

Send us a textI recently published a post explaining My Insanely Productive Stoic Morning Routine.During this article, I provide the morning writing prompts I use. One of those prompts is“What three things will make up my power hour?” If you’re wondering what exactly a power hour is, and how I use it to maximize my productivity while caring for a 2-year-old half of the week and running multiple business projects on the side… …give this short podcast a listen. 

Send us a textThis meditation is one of the most powerful of all the Stoic techniques. The Stoics realized that when you mentally step back and away from a difficult situation— sometimes called cognitive distancing, disassociation, and detachment—you are able to see what is happening with more objectivity and less stress. In other words, this technique allows you to put things in perspective, make better decisions, and live with more tranquility. Have you ever had a situation happen in your life that made you see very clearly that many of the things you were worrying about or spending your time thinking about were actually in fact… meaningless? This happened to me the moment my son was born. In that instant, so many petty concerns and disagreements seemed completely insignificant. By training with The View From Above regularly, you can begin to make this wise and objective perspective your default state.