

Time to Lean
Laura Danger and Crystal Britt
On the Time to Lean podcast with Laura Danger and Crystal Britt, we dig into the often-overlooked realities of domestic labor, care work, and household inequity. Through sharp cultural critiques and discussions on trending topics, we explore the systemic issues that shape our homes and lives. In each weekly episode, we tackle the topics that impact our lives, challenge the status quo, and uncover the hidden dynamics that influence how we live and work. Join us as we make time to lean into these crucial conversations and advocate for the value of the work that truly keeps the world turning.Laura, @thatdarnchat, is an educator and advocate. Crystal Britt, @itscrystalbritt, is a coach and licensed therapist in California. Find us on IG or join us on Patreon @ timetoleanpod for Ad-Free episodes, resources, book clubs, weekly virtual meet-ups and so much more!Check us out on Substack for Ad-Free episodes and supplemental resources! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Jan 15, 2025 • 55min
Three year olds are fine on their own, right?
In this episode of Time to Lean, we share a wild story about a woman who had a three-year-old dropped into the seat next to her on a flight—without a word from the parents. 😳 This unbelievable situation had us thinking about the intense pressures of parenting in public spaces like airplanes. We dive into the anxiety of trying to "prepare for anything," the mental load we carry as parents, and how societal expectations shape the way we navigate these moments. We also explore the implications of neglecting child safety and how weaponized incompetence shows up in unexpected ways. Buckle up for this one—it’s a ride!Here's the link to the original video! Join our Patreon!Download resources and read more from Crystal and Laura here!Have a domestic dilemma or question? Leave us a message on Speakpipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/timetolean OR DM us on IG @timetoleanpodFollow Time to Lean on social media @timetoleanpodFollow Laura on social media @thatdarnchatFollow Crystal on social media @itscrystalbrittDomestic Violence Resources Please note: We are not your doctors. None of what we say should be considered a replacement for therapy. :) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Jan 8, 2025 • 49min
is this mother-in-law the a-hole?
In this episode, Laura and Crystal discuss the complexities of family dynamics, particularly in the context of a viral gender reveal and the emotional labor involved in navigating relationships. They explore the concept of the 'mama's boy' dynamic, the importance of setting boundaries, and the cultural contexts that influence these interactions. The conversation also touches on the emotional toll of familial expectations and the need for self-awareness in managing relationships, especially during the holiday season.Mentioned on this episode:Link to the original video!Join our Patreon!Download resources and read more from Crystal and Laura here!Have a domestic dilemma or question? Leave us a message on Speakpipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/timetolean OR DM us on IG @timetoleanpodFollow Time to Lean on social media @timetoleanpodFollow Laura on social media @thatdarnchatFollow Crystal on social media @itscrystalbrittDomestic Violence Resources Please note: We are not your doctors. None of what we say should be considered a replacement for therapy. :) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dec 18, 2024 • 31min
is it ball-busting to ask you to clean on the weekends?
Laura and Crystal discuss a viral video that ironically covers not only the Nag Paradox but also the double-standard myth that working outside the home should make a partner exempt from working inside the home with the other partner. Mentioned on this episode:Link to the original video!Join our Patreon!Download resources and read more from Crystal and Laura here!Have a domestic dilemma or question? Leave us a message on Speakpipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/timetolean OR DM us on IG @timetoleanpodFollow Time to Lean on social media @timetoleanpodFollow Laura on social media @thatdarnchatFollow Crystal on social media @itscrystalbrittDomestic Violence Resources Please note: We are not your doctors. None of what we say should be considered a replacement for therapy. :) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Dec 11, 2024 • 34min
is it queer to like your wife?
Laura and Crystal tackle the phrase "Happy Wife, Happy Life" by proposing a more equitable relationship dynamic. They discuss the emotional labor involved in partnerships and the importance of shared responsibilities. The conversation boldly confronts gender norms, exploring how joy and affection can be stigmatized, particularly within heterosexual relationships. Humor and creativity shine through as they share anecdotes and challenge societal misconceptions around masculinity and emotional expression.

Dec 4, 2024 • 45min
RE-RELEASE: what's going down at Ballerina Farm?
On this episode, Laura and Crystal discuss the viral Ballerina Farm Time's Article. We delve into the unequal division of labor, the pressure on mothers to prioritize their kids and role as mom above all else, and the lack of autonomy and self-care for mothers.Mentioned on this episode:The viral Time's article on Ballerina FarmMarie Claire's Article on the Evie CoverAll Fours by Miranda JulySara Peterson's Article Re: Ballerina FarmJoin our Patreon!Download resources and read more from Crystal and Laura here!Have a domestic dilemma or question? Leave us a message on Speakpipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/timetolean OR DM us on IG @timetoleanpodFollow Time to Lean on social media @timetoleanpodFollow Laura on social media @thatdarnchatFollow Crystal on social media @itscrystalbrittDomestic Violence Resources Please note: We are not your doctors. None of what we say should be considered a replacement for therapy. :) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nov 27, 2024 • 1h 2min
am I the a-hole for wanting time alone?
We have a listener-submitted question! Queen of Group Projects wants to know if she should feel bad for wanting her partner to do his own tasks ON HIS OWN, rather than together. Crystal and Laura discuss the purpose of delegating tasks, the benefits of alone time, and how to connect outside of the mundane day-to-day!For resources and SO MUCH MORE; Join our Patreon!Have a domestic dilemma or question? Leave us a message on Speakpipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/timetolean OR DM us on IG @timetoleanpodFollow Time to Lean on social media @timetoleanpodFollow Laura on social media @thatdarnchatFollow Crystal on social media @itscrystalbrittDomestic Violence Resources Please note: We are not your doctors. None of what we say should be considered a replacement for therapy. :) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nov 22, 2024 • 51min
am i the a-hole for not helping when my partner says they're overwhelmed?
This week's episode has us grappled with some conflicted feelings. We discuss an AITA where someone asks if they're being a jerk by not helping their partner who says they're overwhelmed by the holiday tasks - the same tasks the original poster handled on their own for years. Scratch your head and spiral out along with us.**Oops, you may notice this week's episode had the wrong audio on it! SORRY ABOUT THAT! - Laura You can find the resources we mention here: On our Patreon!For AD FREE episodes, resources and SO MUCH MORE; Join our Patreon!Have a domestic dilemma or question? Leave us a message on Speakpipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/timetolean OR DM us on IG @timetoleanpodFollow Time to Lean on social media @timetoleanpodFollow Laura on social media @thatdarnchatFollow Crystal on social media @itscrystalbrittDomestic Violence Resources Please note: We are not your doctors. None of what we say should be considered a replacement for therapy. :) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nov 13, 2024 • 57min
if you're so tired, shouldn't you be laying down instead of washing the walls?
In this episode, we explore a viral video featuring a woman who always says she wants to relax, yet when the moment finally comes, she can’t help but get up and keep doing something around the house. We talk through the relatable feeling of never truly switching off, especially for women who feel that even their downtime at home has to be “productive.” Join us as we spiral through the compulsion to stay busy and how deeply it’s tied to societal expectations.For AD FREE episodes, resources and SO MUCH MORE; Join our Patreon!Have a domestic dilemma or question? Leave us a message on Speakpipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/timetolean OR DM us on IG @timetoleanpodFollow Time to Lean on social media @timetoleanpodFollow Laura on social media @thatdarnchatFollow Crystal on social media @itscrystalbrittDomestic Violence Resources Please note: We are not your doctors. None of what we say should be considered a replacement for therapy. :)We <3 Data! Find some of the research we cited below!https://dornsife.usc.edu/news/stories/moms-cognitive-burden-chores/Gaps in free timeThe cognitive load!Time Use Data Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nov 8, 2024 • 1h 3min
what if my partner voted against my best interest?
Explore the challenges couples face when political beliefs clash, and the vital importance of empathy and communication in navigating differences. The discussion offers insights on managing emotional turmoil, establishing boundaries, and the complexities of aligning shared values, especially in parenting and community involvement. Learn about practical financial strategies for empowerment and essential safety precautions for those considering leaving abusive situations. Emphasizing support networks and personal growth, this conversation highlights the necessity of open dialogue in relationships.

Oct 30, 2024 • 1h 4min
what are signs the relationship is over?
Have a domestic dilemma or question? Leave us a message on Speakpipe! https://www.speakpipe.com/timetolean OR DM us on IG @timetoleanpodFollow Time to Lean on social media @timetoleanpodFollow Laura on social media @thatdarnchatFollow Crystal on social media @itscrystalbrittDomestic Violence Resources Please note: We are not your doctors. None of what we say should be considered a replacement for therapy. :)Resources Mentioned This Episode: DBT Assertiveness Scripts: https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/DBT-IE-4-Assertiveness-Scripts-and-Interpersonal-Rights-compressed.pdfDBT Boundaries Worksheet: https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/04/DBT-IE-8-Interpersonal-Boundaries-compressed.pdfDBT What Are Interpersonal Boundaries?: https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/interpersonal-effectiveness/interpersonal-boundaries/Gottman Four Horsemen and Antidotes: https://www.gottman.com/blog/the-four-horsemen-the-antidotes/DBT TIPP: https://dialecticalbehaviortherapy.com/distress-tolerance/tipp/Distress Tolerance STOPP: https://www.hey.nhs.uk/wp/wp-content/uploads/2020/08/OHC_STOPP.pdf Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.