

What Healthy Couples Know That You Don't: Relationship Advice and Respect
Rhoda Sommer LCSW
Relationships matter. Do you want to know the nitty gritty of what makes a relationship work? Get your answers to relationship questions. Learn how to keep respect alive & well, because lack of respect is why people get divorced. Learn what builds trust & how to recover from infidelity, drama or codependency. Advice from psychotherapist Rhoda Sommer based on over 35 years of working with couples. www.therapyideas.net
Episodes
Mentioned books
Oct 21, 2026 • 47min
What Your Envy Is Trying to Tell You (It's Not What You Think)
There are some emotions we talk about all the time, and then there are emotions we quietly tuck away because we're not proud of them. Envy is one of those emotions. We rarely admit it, rarely examine it, and almost never talk about it honestly. Yet it may be one of the most revealing emotions we experience. While jealousy has become a common topic in relationships, envy usually remains hidden, almost as if acknowledging it would make us a bad person.
Oct 7, 2026 • 45min
Is Your Partner Really the Problem? The Mental Health Work That Can Transform Your Relationship
Relationships help us grow up. That's one of the things I love about them, even though sometimes it's also one of the things we like the least. Our relationships hold up a mirror to us. They show us where we're generous and where we're selfish, where we're patient and where we're defensive, where we're good listeners and where we're already preparing our rebuttal before the other person has finished talking. And it's so much easier to point the finger at someone else.
Sep 24, 2026 • 1h 1min
Why you keep choosing the wrong people, the hidden trauma behind your relationship patterns
Have you ever looked at your relationships and thought, why do I keep ending up here? Maybe you keep choosing emotionally unavailable people. Maybe you become the caretaker, the pursuer, the one who works harder to make the relationship work. Maybe you recognize the pattern while you're in it and still can't seem to stop repeating it. What if some of the patterns you think are simply bad choices are actually old coping strategies that once helped you survive pain? Trauma doesn't always announce itself as trauma. Sometimes it looks like the person you're attracted to. The way you respond when someone pulls away, the amount of rejection you can tolerate.
Sep 9, 2026 • 57min
Why You Can't Always Control Your Emotions—and How to Change That
What if being emotionally overwhelmed isn't a character flaw—and learning to regulate yourself isn't about becoming someone who never gets upset? What if self-regulation is simply learning how to find your footing again when life knocks you off balance? That's what makes self-regulation so important for our relationships and our own well-being. It is the internal ability to notice and manage our thoughts, emotions, and behaviors, but more importantly, it reminds us that we have choices even when it feels like we don't.
Aug 26, 2026 • 51min
The Hidden Habits That Are Quietly Hurting Your Relationship (And How to Change Them)
Have you ever wondered why some people seem to grow through life's hardest experiences while others stay stuck repeating the same painful patterns? Most of us want healthier relationships, greater peace, and a stronger sense of purpose, but wanting change and creating change are two very different things. The truth is that transformation rarely begins with learning one more communication skill. It begins with the courage to be honest with ourselves.
Aug 12, 2026 • 37min
What Shame Is Really Trying to Tell You: The Surprising Key to Healing Trauma and Finding Yourself Again
Shame is one of the most powerful human emotions. It can quietly influence the choices we make, the relationships we create, the risks we take, and even the way we talk to ourselves when no one else is listening. Unlike guilt, which says "I did something wrong," shame can leave us feeling like "something is wrong with me." And that belief can become a heavy burden to carry.
Jul 29, 2026 • 57min
Why You Keep Having the Same Fight: Break the Relationship Patterns That Keep You Stuck?
Have you ever found yourself thinking, "Here we go again," as you and your partner repeat the very same argument, hurt feelings, or misunderstandings? Most couples don't struggle because they don't love each other—they struggle because they're caught in relationship patterns they don't even realize they're repeating. The good news is that patterns can be changed.
Jul 15, 2026 • 45min
Falling in Love With AI? The Future of Love, Connection & Human Relationships
What if the biggest threat to your relationship isn't another person—but a machine that's designed to understand you perfectly? In 2025, more than 300 AI companion apps were available, and the rise of AI relationships is accelerating far faster than most people realize. One study from the Institute for Family Studies found that roughly one in seven adults between the ages of 18 and 30 who were dating, engaged, or married reported having an AI companion. This isn't science fiction anymore—it's reshaping how people seek connection, intimacy, and even love.
Jul 1, 2026 • 56min
Unlocking Empathy: One Path to Richer Relationships
Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of others, acting as a cornerstone for meaningful relationships. It allows individuals to connect on a deeper emotional level, facilitating better communication and mutual respect. By stepping into another person's shoes, we gain insight into their experiences, thoughts, and emotions. Yet we seem to be losing our ability to have empathy for others, getting lost in being self-absorbed & scrolling.
Jun 17, 2026 • 1h 2min
How to Thrive in Relationships When Chronic Illness Changes Everything
If you or someone you love is navigating chronic illness inside a relationship, this episode is for you. And even if you're not personally facing a health challenge right now, this conversation matters because at some point, almost every relationship will encounter stress, illness, aging, loss, or caregiving in some form. The question is not whether challenges will come — it's how we learn to face them together while protecting the relationship itself.


