Your Mom's House with Christina P. and Tom Segura

Tom and Christina dive into the curious history of Thanksgiving and the stinky reality of life before antibiotics. They dissect a hilarious clip of a tweaked-out double agent and explore Tom's wild 3% body fat goal. Christina shares her papier-mâché obsession while debating quirky toy representations like Diabetes Barbie. The hosts humorously tackle celebrity anecdotes, food fears around pickles, and bizarre personal stories, blending humor with a sprinkle of social commentary for a wild ride!

Tom will be filming his new stand-up special in Milwaukee at The Riverside Theater on November 14th & 15th! Tickets are still available in Milwaukee for the November 14th show. Go get your tickets now at https://tomsegura.com/tour. SPONSORS: - Tear. Pour. Live More. Go to http://LIQUIDIV.COM and get 20% off your first order with code YMH at checkout. Tom and Christina are back in the Studio Jeans for another week of really wild finds and the discovery of a possible heir to the FedSmoker crown. Before that, Christina launches her new winter makeup drop (“Cuts You Up”) and the Jeans reminisce about classic reality TV — from Wife Swap’s “God Warrior” meltdown to Ice Cube’s bizarre early-2000s race-swap experiment on FX. They then dive deep into constipation talk (suppositories vs. laxatives), hospital horror stories, and whether couples who don’t fart in front of each other are living a lie. Tom reveals his new fear of contact lenses, Christina roasts his glasses, and finally both spiral into laughter over the reincarnation of a YMH legend on a college campus. What’s Up There Chomo? Your Mom’s House Ep. 835 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:54 - Wife Swap God Warrior 00:09:45 - Opening Clip: No Poop For You 00:12:25 - Good Old Fashioned Brown Talk 00:21:19 - Race Swap Reality Show 00:28:24 - Apartheid Museum 00:31:16 - Clip: Gas Station Photographer 00:35:17 - Dad Eyes 00:40:31 - A New FedSmoker? 00:52:22 - Crazy American Melts Down On Boat 00:56:11 - Christina's Curations 01:08:41 - Wrap Up 01:09:48 - Closing Song - "Vocal Fry Jam" by Gaping Dad Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tom will be filming his new stand-up special in Milwaukee at The Riverside Theater on November 14th & 15th! Tickets are still available in Milwaukee for the November 14th show. Go get your tickets now at https://tomsegura.com/tour. SPONSORS: - Head to https://Mood.com and use code YOURMOM to find the functional gummy that matches exactly what you're looking for, and let Mood help you discover YOUR perfect mood. - Get organized, refreshed, and ready for the holidays for way less. Head to https://Wayfair.com right now to shop all things home. - Protect your family with life insurance from Ethos. Get up to $3 million in coverage in as little as 10 minutes at https://ethos.com/YMH. Application times may vary. Rates may vary. Happy Hallow Jeans! Welcome to a very spooky and very fashionable episode of Your Mom’s House! 🎃 This week, Tom Segura and Christina P get into the Halloween spirit—well, Christina does—by showing up as Karl Lagerfeld, complete with fingerless gloves and antisocial energy, while Tom is dressed as a Tom Segura who totally forgets his costume. The jeans dive into Karl’s insane quotes, fashion snobbery, and hatred of sweatpants, before somehow landing on Florida’s trashiest white people, Santa-denying parents, and why Jewish holidays can’t compete with Christmas. Then, the Hamburglar aka Ryan Sickler joins the show to talk about his new stand-up special Live and Alive, why his brow lift left him without a Halloween costume, and how bullying might actually build character. Plus, the Main Mommies also show Ryan some horrible or hilarious clips and everything insane they've been watching this week. ROBBLE ROBBLE! Your Mom’s House Ep. 834 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:57 - Opening Clip: Ryan Needs Some Action 00:06:28 - Halloween On Christmas 00:14:14 - Florida Trash 00:22:50 - Fart Eyes Responds 00:25:40 - Some Gay Stuff 00:34:37 - Clip: Exploding Horny Dude 00:37:48 - Bert 00:40:59 - The Hamburglar Roasts Karl Lagerfeld 00:47:17 - Pudding Unc 00:54:08 - Clip: One Eyed Lady 00:56:12 - Clip: Picky Eater 01:02:09 - Sickler's New Special 01:07:28 - Horrible Or Hilarious 01:22:31 - I'm Ryan 01:27:07 - Cafe Bich Nga 01:30:22 - Lars Van Trier Loves H Dog 01:32:18 - Austin's Poop Problem 01:41:38 - Clip: Earl Changes 01:47:19 - Closing Song - "Fuk Me Tonite" by Matt Mercer Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tom's traveling across Texas, Amarillo on Nov. 1st, then Lubbock on Nov. 2nd and El Paso on Nov. 6th. Make sure to get your tickets at ⁠https://tomsegura.com/tour SPONSORS: - Shop SKIMS Men's at ⁠https://SKIMS.com⁠. - Get 50% Off Monarch Money, the all-in-one financial tool at ⁠https://monarchmoney.com/ymh - Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at https://shopify.com/momshouse Tom Segura and Christina P. welcome world-renowned mentalist Oz Pearlman to Your Mom’s House! Oz stuns the crew with mind-blowing mental tricks, wild psychological insights, and a peek behind the curtain of how he reads people. From guessing Tom’s childhood crush to revealing impossible inside jokes, Oz leaves everyone speechless. Plus, Tom and Christina talk Killarney drunks, pickup artist “Mystery,” and the weirdest viral videos on the internet. Your Mom’s House Ep. 833 https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:04 - Opening Clip: Master Of Redneck Accents 00:10:07 - Sham From Killarney 00:17:39 - Clip: No Neck 00:20:16 - Clip: Coochie Confrontation 00:23:03 - Mystery Is Back 00:35:32 - Oz Pearlman Is Here To Blow Our Minds 00:41:07 - Show N Tell 00:46:35 - Ryan Gets Got 00:54:18 - How'd You Get A Job Here? 01:03:16 - Entertaining Steven Spielberg & Other Heroes 01:12:42 - Christine's Turn 01:19:29 - Enny Hates This 01:22:38 - Birthday Money Trick 01:27:07 - Wrap Up 01:29:23 - Closing Song - "It's A Surprise" by DJ Wet Nut Sack Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Tom's coming to Hanover, Maryland on the 19th as well as all over Indiana Oct. 23th - 26th. Make sure to get your tickets at https://TomSegura.com/Tour SPONSORS: Use the read where they say http://helixsleep.com/YMH Get your first month of BlueChew FREE at https://bluechew.com New Customers Bet $5 Get $300 in Bonus Bets If Your Bet Wins. The Crown Is Yours! Sign up using https://dkng.co/mom or through my promo code MOM. #DKPartner Head to https://www.squarespace.com/MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code MOM. Hey, Jeans! Tim’s off at rehab for an eating disorder (allegedly), so Christina welcomes certified Soul Mommy and Not Today Pal co-host Rob Iler to hold down the fort. They dive head-first into the single life, dating red flags, and the thriving world of inmate dating apps — complete with reviews of real prison profiles. Rob reveals his “type,” Christina confesses her John Goodman fantasy, and together they somehow connect it all to asthma, cigarettes, and childhood trauma. If you're in the mood for farts, felons, and philosophy this week, you've come to the right place! Your Mom’s House Ep. 832 https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit https://gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit https://ccpg.org (CT), or visit https://www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in NH/OR/ONT. Eligibility restrictions apply. Terms: https://draftkings.com/sportsbook. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). Fees may apply in IL. 1 per new customer. Must register new account to receive reward Token. Must select Token BEFORE placing min. $5 bet to receive $300 in Bonus Bets if your bet wins. Min. -500 odds req. Token and Bonus Bets are single-use and non-withdrawable. Token expires 11/23/25. Bonus Bets expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: https://sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos. Ends 11/16/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:03:53 - Opening Clip: Fat Women Are Broke Dudes 00:08:26 - You're The One For Me Fatty 00:15:16 - Idaho Prison Inmate Dating Game 00:22:06 - Wolly Willy Babe 00:27:41 - Here For Good Time, Not Long Time 00:32:27 - Chain Smoking Grandparents 00:40:21 - Traveling Girls 00:45:48 - Happy Tom, Gross Rob 00:53:06 - Clip: Horse Milk 00:54:39 - Big Cheese Guy 00:58:49 - Learning Things From TikTok 01:05:55 - Poo Poo Pee Pee Dealbreakers + Rob's Pazsitzky Effect 01:14:28 - Christina's Curations 01:24:07 - More TikToks 01:40:45 - Closing Song -"Booty Opens Up" by Buttstin Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

New Jersey and and New York Tom's coming to you Oct. 15th, 17th and 18th. Make sure to get your tickets at https://TomSegura.com/Tour SPONSORS: - Tear. Pour. Live More. Go to http://LIQUID-IV.COM and get 20% off your first order with code YMH at checkout. - Head to https://Mood.com and use code YOURMOM to find the functional gummy that matches exactly what you're looking for, and let Mood help you discover YOUR perfect mood. Welcome back to the Mommy Dome! Tom Segura and Christina P are bleeding with laughter this week—literally. From syncing up their “cycles” to debating who actually looks at their own turds, the mommydom gets raw, messy, and very YMH. Christina shares her discovery that she might be a femboy thanks to TikTok, the two lose it over a Vietnamese café, and a drunk casino regular goes viral for swearing revenge on Encore at 10:30 in the morning. Things get even wilder with a Miami tax-prep guru who doubles as a bizarre influencer, a heated dental update with a hygiene showdown where Tom insists he “knows gums,” and Christina’s revelation about her biggest fear of turning into an emotional vampire. It's bloody good time this week at Your Mom’s House! Your Mom’s House Ep. 831 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:05:33 - Opening Clip: Cafe Bich Nga 00:13:41 - A History Lesson 00:21:16 - Boston Gambler 00:27:20 - Cool Accountant 00:33:33 - Clip: Catching Poops 00:37:05 - Clip: Happy Birthday Fatty 00:37:29 - DENTAL UPDATE 00:43:36 - Horrible Or Hilarious 00:51:11 - The Person You're Afraid Of Becoming 00:58:32 - Clip: Rollercoaster Barf 00:58:56 - Clip: Road Rage Cabron 01:03:46 - TikToks 01:18:09 - Closing Song -"Alpha Advice" by WavKingz Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Attention Hanover, MD! Tommy Buns is coming to The Hall At Live! Casino, Sunday, October 19. Get tickets now at https://tomsegura.com/tour Don't miss out on the chance to pick up Christina's 4 new cosmetic products! Evermore Liquid Lipstick, Lip Gloss, and Velvet Crush Blush. Available now at https://christinap.com SPONSORS: - New Customers Bet $5 Get $200 in Bonus Bets If Your Bet Wins. Sign-up using https://dkng.co/mom or through my promo code MOM Tom Segura and Christina P are back in Studio Jeans serving up another chaotic episode of Your Mom’s House! Christina unveils her new “witchy” fall lipstick drop while Tom recalls getting mauled by a pro fighter. The gang debates who smells worse—Eastern Europeans or Americans under 25—before diving into wild clips featuring Frankie Fart Eyes, fart orgy requests, and some of the worst porn acting you’ve ever seen. Plus: Tom tells stories of hanging out ringside with BTBs like Mike Tyson and Marshawn Lynch, and Christina defends her controversial stance on “napkin pants.” It’s foul, it’s funny, it’s YMH and it's stinky! Your Mom’s House Ep. 830 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit http://gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit https://ccpg.org (CT), or visit http://www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in NH/OR/ONT. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). Fees may apply in IL. 1 per new customer. Must register new account to receive reward Token. Must select Token BEFORE placing min. $5 bet to receive $200 in Bonus Bets if your bet wins. Min. -500 odds req. Token and Bonus Bets are single-use and non-withdrawable. Token expires 10/19/25. Bonus Bets expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: http://sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos . Ends 10/12/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:16 - Opening Clip: Fart Eyes 00:12:33 - BTB Type Shit 00:20:14 - Fartmacy 00:28:06 - Smelly M-Fers 00:33:21 - The Worst Smelling Countries List 00:46:56 - Napkin Pants 00:49:25 - Gay Stuff For Enny 00:57:32 - Clip: Fart Drive-Thru 00:58:31 - Clip: WHAT 01:01:10 - Art Update 01:02:30 - Closing Song -"*ss Liquor" by R PATTZ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

SPONSORS: - Shop, save, and SCOOOORE today at https://Wayfair.com. - For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, ED, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://Hims.com/YMH. - Go to https://ThriveMarket.com/YMH to get 30% off your first order and a free $60 gift. - If you’re 21+, try VIIA! For 15% off AND a free gift with your first order head to https://viia.co/YMH and use code YMH! #viiaparter Tom Segura and Christina P are back in Studio Jeans with one of their all-time favorite guests—comedian Ian Bagg! The Mommies dive right in with Ian’s trademark razor-sharp crowd-work style and wild storytelling, picking up where they left off after years of friendship and touring together. Ian shares hilarious memories from their trip to South Africa, including Apartheid Museum awkwardness, getting clowned by local comics, and Bobby Lee’s infamous run-in with some unlucky robbers. They also talk about the chaos of comedy festivals, the strange hierarchy among comics, and what it’s like navigating green rooms, promoters, and fans before a big "Blacks Only" show. Before Ian joins in, Tom and Christina debate a relationship fights where someone says “Nobody cares,” check out a clip of a dude threatening to eat a strangers’ ass, debut some now censored art, get raw with emotion, and take a bite of Fancy Chef's big chocolate bar. Strap in, Jeans, because Baggles is back! Your Mom’s House Ep. 829 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://christinap.com/ https://store.ymhstudios.com https://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:08:12 - Opening Clip: Buy Christina's New Lipstick 00:14:16 - Clip: Dear Jennifer 00:16:49 - Art Update 00:19:26 - "Nobody Cares" Email 00:31:01 - Clip: Bite Of Your Sexy Ass 00:34:01 - The Main Mommies Get Emotional 00:41:43 - Clip: Fancy Chocolate Bar 00:44:35 - Ian Bagg: Comedy In South Africa 00:52:16 - Green Room 01:01:31 - Clip: Angry Aussie Politician 01:03:11 - Other Canadians & Will Blunderfield 01:12:00 - Horrible Or Hilarious 01:19:33 - Iraqi Influencer 01:26:05 - Private Videos In Public 01:31:53 - Black Magic 01:35:17 - TikToks 01:47:20 - Clip: Relationship Advice 01:50:28 - Clip: Not A Real Cop 01:51:03 - Rope Prep & After Care 01:55:47 - Wrap Up 01:56:57 - Closing Song - "Fart Mic" by DJ Fartmoose Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Make sure to watch Jordan's new Netflix special "Take Me With You", streaming now! SPONSORS: Sign up for your $1 per month trial and start selling today at https://shopify.com/momshouse Head to https://BlueChew.com to get your first month FREE. Just use promo code YMH at checkout and pay five bucks for shipping. New Customers Bet $5 Get $200 Instantly in Bonus Bets. Sign up using https://dkng.co/mom or through my promo code MOM Go to http://helixsleep.com/YMH for 25% Off Sitewide. Welcome back to Your Mom’s House with Tom Segura and Christina P! This week Tim and Kristin are joined by comedian Jordan Jensen (Netflix: Take Me With You, Being Ian with Jordan).The mommies kick things off with some cat updates, code switching, and a heated debate about napkin pants. Then Jordan sits down to talk about growing up with two moms and a cowboy dad, why female comics all have “dyke energy,” and the elite nightmare of dating apps like Raya.We get into cold plunges, “gender traitors,” road rage in New York City, fart legends like King Ass Ripper, and Jordan’s on-again-off-again relationships. Plus: the infamous “N-Ain’t Shit” lady, breakdancing protestors, and why sharts aren’t what you think they are.It’s a packed episode full of laughs, chaos, and classic YMH insanity. Your Mom’s House Ep. 828 https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit http://gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org (CT) or visit http://www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new customer. $5+ first-time bet req. Max. $200 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: http://sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos . Ends 9/29/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:01:48 - Christina's Art & Cat Breath 00:04:10 - Code Switching For Elite Whites 00:15:57 - Opening Clip: Demons In My Womb 00:18:39 - Clip: Fart On Me Freakout 00:23:28 - Double Pipe Collab 00:25:56 - Do You Have A Husband? 00:30:48 - Clip: Presidential Candidate 00:32:36 - Full Figured Woman 00:36:38 - Napkin Pants 00:38:49 - Jordan Jensen Isn't Gay 00:44:27 - Masculine Comedy Energy 00:50:24 - Gender Traitor 01:40:45 - Closing Song: "Six Butts (More To Love)" By DJ Fat Hog Jeans Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

SPONSORS: - Shop SKIMS Mens at ⁠https://SKIMS.com⁠ - New Customers Bet $5 Get $200 Instantly in Bonus Bets. Sign up using https://dkng.co/mom or through my promo code MOM. - Tear. Pour. Live More. Go to ⁠http://LIQUID-IV.COM⁠ and get 20% off your first order with code YMH at checkout. - Get 50% Off Monarch Money, the all-in-one financial tool at https://www.monarchmoney.com/ymh - Head to https://www.squarespace.com/MOM to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain using code MOM. Tom Segura and Christina P are back in the jeans with a very special guest — the King of Props himself, Carrot Top! From his legendary Vegas run at the Luxor to his wildest corporate gig disasters, Carrot Top brings decades of insane stories, prop magic, and pure chaos. Before Carrot Top enters the Mommy Dome, Tim and Christine The mommies dive deep into everything from Christina’s new artwork of Tom’s body (and perfectly to-scale junk) to DIY butt-stuff therapies, plus ass-worship furniture, queening chairs on Amazon, and the return of the fart mic. Carrot Top talks insane backstage Tonight Show moments and why George Carlin was one of his biggest fans. He also talks growing up in Florida, life in Vegas, Phyllis Diller stealing his joke, and reacts to classic YMH prop man, Uncle Terry. Carrot Top also opens his trunk and shows the Main Mommies some of his latest wacky props. It’s a filthy, hilarious ride with one of the most iconic comics alive. Don’t miss it, Jean. Your Mom’s House Ep. 827 https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast GAMBLING PROBLEM? CALL 1-800-GAMBLER, (800) 327-5050 or visit http://gamblinghelplinema.org (MA). Call 877-8-HOPENY/text HOPENY (467369) (NY). Please Gamble Responsibly. 888-789-7777/visit http://ccpg.org (CT) or visit http://www.mdgamblinghelp.org (MD). 21+ and present in most states. (18+ DC/KY/NH/WY). Void in ONT/OR/NH. Eligibility restrictions apply. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino & Resort (KS). 1 per new customer. $5+ first-time bet req. Max. $200 issued as non-withdrawable Bonus Bets that expire in 7 days (168 hours). Stake removed from payout. Terms: http://sportsbook.draftkings.com/promos . Ends 9/29/25 at 11:59 PM ET. Sponsored by DK. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:03:26 - Opening Clip: Butt Stuff Solutions 00:05:38 - Christina's New Art 00:16:45 - Karl Lagerfeld 00:19:45 - Queening & Ass Worship 00:29:57 - Clip: Join Me In The Shower 00:31:50 - Mean Comments From Dudes 00:35:13 - Clip: Tard Fraud 00:39:58 - Carrot Top 00:45:20 - The Prop Process 00:54:33 - Clean Comedy & Nightmare Gigs 01:03:26 - Clip: Ozzy's Austrian Painter Inspo 01:04:14 - Clip: Dan Pena 01:04:27 - Clip: Tard Fraud 01:06:05 - Messing With Gene Simmons & Stolen Prop Valor 01:25:52 - Uncle Terry, Gingers, & More Props 01:35:53 - TikToks 01:44:48 - Carlin Liked Me 01:53:03 - Closing Song -"Now I'm In Your Ass Yeah" by Street Justice Remix Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices