
Your Secret Is Safe With Me
Dr. Marie Murphy talks about infidelity and other challenging relationship situations from a non-judgmental perspective. She shares practical tools and advice from her own coaching practice to help you make changes in your love life, and interviews professionals with complementary expertise, such as family law attorneys, mediators, non-violent communication specialists, and more. In addition, Marie discusses the social and historical context of romantic relationships to provide perspective on our taken-for-granted assumptions about how relationships are supposed to be. To learn more, visit mariemurphyphd.com.
Latest episodes

Apr 10, 2025 • 23min
213: Beginnings and Endings
Is it really okay to end something that's working well? After much consideration, I've decided to pause production of Your Secret is Safe With Me indefinitely while I pursue new creative endeavors. This decision wasn't made because anything is wrong—quite the opposite. My experience with this transition mirrors what many of my clients face in their relationships and life choices. There's often a belief that we shouldn't end something that's "good enough" or that we must finish everything we've started. But what if the most faithful act to ourselves is allowing evolution, even when it means leaving something valuable behind? This final episode explores the legitimacy of change and the permission we all deserve to give ourselves when moving in new directions. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/213

Mar 27, 2025 • 46min
212: Choosing Between Two Good Things
Have you ever felt stuck between two good choices? Through my personal story of leaving a life I loved to join the Peace Corps, I illustrate how choosing between two good things - while challenging - can lead to profound growth and fulfillment. If you're struggling with a decision that feels impossible because both options have value, this episode is for you. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/212

Mar 13, 2025 • 33min
211. Dealing With Your Personal Problems When the World Is on Fire
Feeling overwhelmed by the state of the world? Wondering how to focus on your own personal struggles—like dealing with infidelity—when global crises seem so much bigger? In this episode, I explore how to stay engaged with the world's problems without being consumed by them. You'll learn why tending to your own challenges is not selfish but essential, and how taking responsibility for what you can control helps you build resilience and show up for yourself and others. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/211

Feb 27, 2025 • 33min
210. Sex Work and Infidelity Part 2
Does your partner's sexual past make you uncomfortable? What if you found out they had exchanged sex for money before you met - would that feel like cheating? These are the kinds of thorny questions I tackle head-on in this week’s episode. I’ll help you examine your beliefs about sex work, infidelity, and how much of our pasts we need to share with new partners. Whether you've been on either side of this situation or are just curious to expand your perspective, you'll gain valuable insights for approaching these sensitive conversations with more clarity and intentionality. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/210

Feb 13, 2025 • 1h 14min
209. Astrology and Infidelity with Karen Hawkwood (Part 2)
Have you ever felt like you have competing desires when it comes to relationships? Like part of you craves freedom and adventure while another part yearns for deep intimacy and stability? Astrologer Karen Hawkwood joins me this week to discuss how astrology can provide a framework for understanding these complex and often paradoxical needs. We also discuss how legitimizing all parts of ourselves, even the ones that seem to be in conflict, is key to finding more peace in our love lives. If you've struggled to make sense of your infidelity situation, this episode will offer a new perspective on honoring the fullness of who you are. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/209

Jan 30, 2025 • 34min
208. Sex Work and Infidelity Part 1
Is paying for sex cheating? In this week’s episode, I dive into the complex intersection of sex work and infidelity. I explore how to be a conscious consumer of sexual services, the social stigma around sex work, and the diversity of experiences within the industry. I also address listener questions about the risks and benefits of seeing sex workers versus having an affair. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/208

Jan 16, 2025 • 1h 12min
207. Astrology and Infidelity with Karen Hawkwood
Have you ever wondered if your astrological chart holds clues to your relationship patterns and tendencies? In this episode, I sit down with teacher and practitioner of archetypal astrology, Karen Hawkwood, to explore how astrology can provide valuable insights into the parts of ourselves that shape our experiences with infidelity. Whether you're well-versed in astrology or simply curious about how it might relate to your own infidelity situation, this episode offers a thought-provoking perspective on the ways in which we can work with our inherent tendencies and needs to create more fulfilling relationships. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/207

Jan 2, 2025 • 15min
206. Where Do You Want to Be a Year from Now?
What would your life look like a year from now if you resolved your infidelity situation in a way that felt really amazing to you? Do you struggle to imagine what resolving your infidelity situation could look like? Listen in this week as I dive into the power of envisioning your ideal future and guide you through a series of prompts that will help you imagine the most delightful, satisfying resolution to your infidelity situation. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/206

Dec 19, 2024 • 17min
205. What Can You Give Yourself More Credit For?
What if I told you that the key to making positive changes in your life is self-love and acceptance, not self-loathing? It may sound counterintuitive, but giving yourself credit for what you HAVE done can be incredibly motivating, especially if you've been beating yourself up over infidelity. In this episode, I guide you through an exercise to reflect on your accomplishments, big and small, over the past year. You'll be amazed at how empowering it feels! Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/205

Dec 5, 2024 • 36min
204. The Challenges of Infidelity During the Holidays
Do the holidays have you feeling stuck between a rock and a hard place in your infidelity situation? You're not alone. Trying to balance family obligations with an affair partner's desires can seem impossible. But even when you don't like your options, you still have choices. In this episode, I explore real-world scenarios and discuss how to identify your options, make decisions you feel good about, and take responsibility for your own happiness - no matter what your affair partner or spouse does. Get full show notes, transcript, and more information here: https://www.mariemurphyphd.com/204