How To!

It’s been two decades since Maggie’s mom has gone to the doctor and her health is incredibly….shaky. Maggie’s mom has severe asthma and allergies which has basically isolated her from the world. With isolation has come anger and bitterness. Maggie is at a loss. She’s tried everything she can think of yet her mother refuses to get help. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Elizabeth Berg, a nurse-turned-bestselling novelist who has penned some 30 books, many focusing on family drama. Her latest is a touching memoir called I’ll Be Seeing You, which follows her perfectly imperfect parents as they’ve gotten older. Elizabeth has some hard-earned wisdom for Maggie, and all of us, about navigating a contentious relationship with our aging parents. If you liked this episode, check out “How To Embrace Your Anti-Vax Family This Holiday Season” and “How To Get a Stubborn Parent to Listen.”Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Susan was concerned when she first learned that someone was impersonating her on Facebook, but that soon turned to anger when she realized the imposter had sent inappropriate photos to her real life friends. Susan tried and failed to get the account taken down. Then came the extortion letter...and now she’s freaking out a bit. On this episode of How To!, Jack Rhysider, host of Darknet Diaries and cybersecurity veteran, talks about the time he was stalked on the internet. Jack no longer shares much online — he won’t even show his face. You don't have to go that far, but there are things you can do to protect your online data and your emotions in real life. If you’re worried about being exposed, Jack has some great resources for battling stalkers and online harassment.If you liked this episode, check out “How To Steal Back Your Identity.” Do you have a hacker horror story with a happy ending? Or some other problem we can help solve? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Last week we learned about using the four different styles of humor to your advantage, and who makes a good target for a joke. But what if you read the room wrong and absolutely bomb? On this episode of How To!, the second in a two-part series, we resume our conversation with Naomi Bagdonas, co-author of Humor, Seriously!, and Michael Terry, the most hilarious hedge fund guy we’ve ever met. They swap stories about office jokes that fell flat, how to navigate a suddenly tense situation and what to do if your humor accidentally offends someone (especially your boss). If you liked this episode, check out “How To Be Funny” with comedian Gary Gulman. If you want to discover your own humor style, take the test on Naomi and Jennifer’s website. Do you have a joke that killed at the office, or totally bombed? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Discover how humor can be a powerful tool in the workplace and relationships, with insights on the 'humor cliff' phenomenon and different humor styles. Learn how humor can enhance productivity, mental health, and communication, with advice on using self-deprecating humor effectively. Tune in for a fun and informative discussion on the benefits of embracing humor in everyday life.

Have you ever had to make an impossible decision? One that doesn’t have an obvious “right” answer. One that someone will inevitably hate. John knows this feeling all too well. He’s the superintendent for a mid-size school district in California. To say the last school year was difficult is a major understatement… John tried to ensure the safety of his students, teachers, and faculty while balancing the reality of students struggling in their virtual classes. Throughout the school year, John’s relationship with his teachers and the teachers union deteriorated. Now, classes are back in session and he’s hoping to find common ground as soon as possible. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Gary Friedman, a world-renowned conflict mediator. He has some tips on how all of us can mend a fraught relationship before it’s too late. If you liked this episode, check out “How To Stand Up to Your Terrible Manager—Without Getting Fired.”Do you have a problem you can’t get out of your head? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show.This episode originally ran on August 31, 2021. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Every year, around the same time, Peter’s apartment comes alive. The shadows begin to scuttle and the pipes creak with creepy crawlies. At least that’s how it feels. Peter is freaked out by Israel’s large flying cockroaches. Logically, he knows they don’t pose a threat. But he can’t control his visceral disgust at encountering one and his panicked vigilance in the days that follow. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Dr. Elizabeth McMahon, a clinical psychologist who has been treating phobias like these for the last 30 years. She has some very practical advice for Peter, and anyone else with an irrational fear they’d like to overcome. Elizabeth often uses virtual reality therapy with her clients, most recently to treat needle phobias. She’s made this needle phobia training available for licensed therapists or supervised trainees.If you liked this episode, check out “How To Not Be Scared.”Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Every January nearly 75 percent of Americans resolve to make their lives better by losing weight. But this year we’re breaking free from the cycle of restrictive eating and spiraling shame. Journalist Virginia Sole-Smith, host and author of Burnt Toast and The Eating Instinct, has some eye-opening tips for our listener Tori that will help her ditch the scale, become more comfortable with her body, and even learn to control sugar cravings—by eating as many sweets as she wants. If you liked this episode, check out “How To Lose 155 Pounds Happily”Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

James is head over heels in love with his wife. But there’s one thing that keeps getting in between them … the glow of her smartphone. His wife is constantly scrolling social media or staging photo ops with James and their kids to create a picture perfect life online. On this episode of How To!, we bring on Dr. David Greenfield, the founder of The Center for Internet and Technology Addiction, to help James understand why it’s so hard for his wife to log off. He has some fascinating advice for how to wean yourself off social media and reconnect IRL without creating a bigger rift in the relationship. If you liked this episode, check out “How To Put Down Your Phone.”Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

One night a few months ago Elaine got a phone call out of the blue from a co-worker. She and her 12-year old daughter had checked herself into a hotel after she was beaten by husband. Elaine took her co-worker to the hospital and encouraged her to leave her husband, but a couple weeks later she was back at home. Now Elaine can’t stop worrying about her friend and wondering if (and how) she should help. On this episode of How To!, we’re joined by Suzanne Dubus, advocate, survivor and CEO of the Jeanne Geiger Crisis Center. Suzanne says one in five women (and one in seven men) will be the victims of severe physical violence during their lifetime. She understands all too well why it takes so long for victims of domestic violence to leave their abusers, and gives us some practical advice for what to do if we ever find ourselves in Elaine’s shoes. If you or someone you love is struggling with intimate partner violence, visit the National Domestic Violence Hotline’s website or call 1-800-799-SAFE. If you liked this episode, check out “How To Say the Right Thing at the Worst Time.”Do you have a question with no easy answers? Send us a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001 and we might have you on the show.This episode is supported by Work Check, an original podcast from Atlassian.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Here at How To! headquarters, we give and receive a lot of good advice. This year we ran faster, kept cool in a crisis, had the best sex of our lives, stopped snoring, and even won the Olympics. The How To! team, including former host David Epstein, gathers ‘round the mic to round up our favorite advice of the year. We talk about how we applied that advice to our own lives, share some surprising updates from folks who were on the show, and give a behind-the-scenes look at how the podcast is made each week. Did we forget to mention your favorite advice of the year? Let us know with a note at howto@slate.com or leave us a voicemail at 646-495-4001.Slate Plus members get bonus segments and ad-free podcast feeds. Sign up now at slate.com/howtoplus. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices