Manned Up Conversations

Send us a textShoutout to you if you're joining us for the first time, and thank you for coming back to listen; your support is greatly appreciated.In this episode we expand on a conversation we had with Tshegofatso Sephula on a mental health awareness campaign we did with John Craig to discuss some highlights from his book, Mental Decay. Tshegofatso talks about identity issues, navigating family dynamics with mental health challenges, the inspiration behind sharing his story and letting go of expectations. We also talk about the impact of family secrets and his openly honest relationship with his mother and details meeting his father for the first time which led to him accepting that he can no longer make excuses for his absent father.  Tshegofatso Sephula is the author of Mental Decay, a true story of a hidden battle and a life nearly lost. After a decade of failure and a suicide attempt, he feels the pull of God, and with it the chance to finally find peace, purpose and redemption.If you enjoyed this conversation, please subscribe and share. Peace and Love.Connect:Buy on Amazon: Mental DecayInstagram: @TshegofatsoTiyaniRelated Episodes:SAFMH - Ready to share my storyJohn Craig - Mind Matter Series:EP1 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FVTioqU4M2Q&t=1838sEP2 - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jFERWd1hK2o&t=138sHope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textShoutout to you if you're joining us for the first time, and thank you for coming back to listen; your support is greatly appreciated.  We've covered many conversations over the last three years, while going through some books, research and conversations with friends and listening to the online community, I've been reflecting on the idea of male privilege or to be more specific, black male privilege. I know this is an extremely contentious topic in the gender discourse but I want to offer an alternative argument against black male privilege leveraging the work of Dr Tommy J Curry and some research from South African gender experts to show some similarity in the lived experiences of black men in the United States of America and South Africa based on colonization and apartheid and Jim Crow laws in the respective countries.  The idea is not to defend privilege, but this episode questions our idea of privilege and share some insights on what I believe (and other researchers have shown) is a fundemental problem with how we perceive the distribution of power and privilege among men.   Hope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textShoutout to you if you're joining us for the first time, and thank you for coming back to listen; your support is greatly appreciated.I was intrigued by an article shared by Ground Up and the Daily Maverick titled, “Battered woman syndrome”: law to be challenged." The Centre for Applied Legal Studies has laid out a strong argument for women who kill in self defence arguing that the courts don't empathise or consider the psychological effects of abuse when sentencing "battered women."    CALS argued that “This case demonstrates that the current approach of providing courts with wide unfettered discretion when considering mitigation in relation to women who kill their intimate partners as a result of prolonged violence is insufficient in dealing with femicide in this country.”I realized that there was no mention of men or the "battered man syndrome" exepct the abusive husband but I was not surprised considering the prevailing narrative around men and reality of many women in South Africa. In this short episode, I question whether this attempt to justify the husband's killing as self defence adds to the gender empathy gap men experience in the legal system?  If you enjoyed this conversation, please subscribe and share. Peace and Love.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textShoutout to you if you're joining us for the first time, and thank you for coming back to listen; your support is greatly appreciated.In this episode we explore an uncommon but interesting story of a US Army conscientious objector and social work graduate student, Kyle Toon to talk about his decision to leave the army after serving for 10 years where he enrolled at 17 years old. Kyle shares how going against family lineage caused an internal conflict and mental heath issues resulting from the dissonance he experienced when comparing what he was learning from African centered education versus the life he was leading including his work in the army.We also highlight issues around African identity, family health and ideas for connecting with the global African community.  Through work on Embrace Perfection Kyle Toon is striving and seeking to inculcate, promote, and provide access to MENTAL HEALTHINESS , wellness, and growth-inducing knowledge and resources for the Black parent, caregiver, every day survivor, and those aspiring to begin their own family. He is based in the United States and  If you enjoyed this conversation, please subscribe and share. Peace and Love.Reach out to the South African Federation of Mental Health:Website: Embrace PerfectionInstagram: always_gracefullyimperfectPodcast: Gracefully ImperfectOther podcasts and articles featuring Kyle Toon:I'm requesting discharge not non combat statusThe deliacy and frigility of life hit meCenter on ConscienceHope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textShoutout to you if you're joining us for the first time, and thank you for coming back to listen; your support is greatly appreciated.We talk about men's coping mechanisms and how seeking help—or not—can lead to mental health issues and suicidal thoughts in this courageous interview with Leon De Beer, the deputy director of the South African Federation of Mental Health. After his divorce, Leon experienced suicide ideation. By sharing his story, he emphasizes the value of reaching out and surrounding yourself with people who can support and understand you during difficult times. We additionally acknowledge the courage required to speak up in the face of adversity and the negative effects of substance abuse on our health. We also speak about generational trauma and the impact of apartheid and close off by sharing details of where men can go for help.      Leon De Beer's work is underpinned by a deep passion for human rights. He holds an Honours Degree in Psychology and a Masters Degree in Social Policy and Development.If you enjoyed this conversation, please subscribe and share. Peace and Love.Reach out to the South African Federation of Mental Health:Website: South African Federation for Mental HealthFacebook: SA Mental HealthTwitter (X): @safmhLinkedIn: SA Federation for Mental HealthInstagram: SAFMH South AfricaOther links and books mentioned in the conversation:BIG BOYS DO IN FACT ALSO CRY: MEN AND SUICIDECultural Silence Wounded Souls with Mark TuggleUnderstanding Male Psychology with Angelo De BoniThe Stigma Around Mental Health and Male Suicide with Nkini PhashaSupport the Show.Hope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textShoutout to you if you're joining us for the first time, and thank you for coming back to listen; your support is greatly appreciated.In this exciting talk with the quantum leaping physicist, we discuss knowing thyself from several of viewpoints, including history, education, and tools to aid you on your own journey. We also discuss some challenging issues regarding the representation of African culture and its impact on identity. Met_a_morphosis also discusses how he balances his four careers while giving back to underserved communities through mathematics education and public speaking coaching. Thando Motumi aka Met_A_Morphosis is an artist, writer, scientist and educator.Using fusions of visual art, philosophy and science he weaves tales that delve deep into the intricacies of the mind. Showcasing a medley of poetry, images and music.Met_A_Morphosis will take you on a journey through the realm of abstract art, consciousness and notions of self. He delivers intricate freestyles with a conscious flow.Based in Pretoria, South Africa he has performed at festivals, delivered showcases at the Jhb theatre and won multiple awards. With an extensive repertoire his style is one which brings remnants to the early years of Hip Hop.If you enjoyed this conversation, please subscribe and share. Peace and Love. Connect with Met_a_morphosis:https://linktr.ee/met_a_morphosisOther links and books mentioned in the conversation:YFM #Unlockedchats: Met_a_morphosisThey Came Before ColumbusAdams CalendarPedagogy of The OppressedSupport the Show.Hope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textThanks for listening if you are joining for the first time, hope you enjoy the conversation and peace and love to you for coming back to listen.Although the term "safe spaces" is frequently used in casual conversations, what does it actually mean?  We explore the impportance and quality of conversations held in such spaces and highlight some essential elements of designing safe spaces, we then question if our own and others efforts in reaching and working with men are effective in addressing their issues. Dr Vuyo also shares some interesting tools he recommends as alternative ways to provide men's services in spaces that they are already familiar with.  Dr Vuyo Yokwe is a medical doctor and a Mens mental health advocate. Dr Yokwe hopes to increase awareness of mental health issues and to decrease mental health stigma related to men. Dr Yokwe started a community called Man Vitality Conversation to talk frankly about men's mental health matters.Be sure to subscribe and share if you enjoy the conversation.Connect with Dr Vuyo Yokwe:Instagram:@drvuyo_manvitalityTwitter: @VuyoYokweFacebook: Dr Vuyo YokweHope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube.Hope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the Show.Sign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessHope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textThanks for listening if you are joining for the first time, hope you enjoy the conversation and peace and love to you for coming back to listen.Many males avoid using the word patriarchy because they perceive it as an attack on their gender. Some activists have even asserted that men of African origin are not entitled to privilege or patriarchy. Despite this, many people are still unaware of the influence of patriarchal structures. During a conference in November 2023, my guest Kneo Mokgopa gave a fascinating presentation titled "Protecting Your Critical Thinking From Patriarchy." The presentation discussed how patriarchal thinking prevents men from fully experiencing their humanity, putting us in boxes and creating conflicting notions of what is possible for us as men in a society that is constantly changing. We dissect this and examine the ways in which families, schools, and even the way we phrase certain arguments in social interactions uphold patriarchy.  Kneo Mokgopa (they/he), LLB. is the Narrative Development Manager at the Nelson Mandela Foundation. Kneo holds a law degree from the University of Cape Town and is a Thought Fellow at the Centre for Creative & Critical Thought at the University of Stellenbosch. Kneo serves on Section 11 Committee on the National Question and Anti-Racism, hosted by the South African Human Rights Commission, and they are a widely published writer with a regular column in the Daily Maverick, titled Unthere where they explore the nature of the boundaries between human and object in post-Apartheid South Africa.Be sure to subscribe and share if you enjoy the conversation. Connect with Kneo Mokgopa:Instagram: @Bloody_kneoListen to Freedom After PodcastHope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the Show.Sign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Hope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textThanks for listening if you are joining for the first time, hope you enjoy the conversation and peace and love to you for coming back to listen.On episode 60 we explore men's emotional language with Clinical Psychologist, Matthew Steele. We discuss the impact of testosterone and men’s emotions. Looking at family as a space for teaching emotional literacy, we also discuss how parents play a part in helping boys develop emotional awareness.  Matthew share some tips on creating male friendly therapy spaces and encourages men to not wait until they have a metal illness or serve mental health challenges, prioritize your mental health and speak to speak to a professional. While these are the main talking points in this conversation, we also touch on depression, coping strategies and things one can do to give back to themselves.   Be sure to subscribe and share if you enjoy the conversation.  Connect with Matthew Steele:email: practice@msdsteele.comHope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com

Send us a textThanks for listening if you are joining for the first time, hope you enjoy the conversation and peace and love to you for coming back to listen.On episode 59 I met with Malose Langa at The University of the Witwatersrand, Johannesburg to discuss his insights and reflections on working with men and boys. We discuss the impact of father wounds, why many men and boys feel the pressure to perform a certain type of masculinity to either fit in or protect their masciline identity and the perception of black men and boys in society.  Connect with Malose Langa via mail:email: malose.langa@wits.ac.za Resources mentioned:Becoming Men Black Masculinities in a South African Township. State of South African Fathers Report 2021State of the World's Fathers 2023Hope you are enjoying the conversation so far. Remember to take note of things that stand out to you while listening and take a moment to reflect in your own time or discuss this with some friends over some drinks, a meal or relaxing activity of your choice. Thank you for tuning into Manned Up Conversations. Please subscribe to help grow the platform, you can also find us on YouTube if you prefer video and don't forget to share your comments, insights or questions.Support the showSign up for Ain't Heavy, My Brother - A Workshop in Support of Grieving Men on rituals4men@gmail.com.Donate To Our Campaign with Love Your Nuts Foundation To Raise Testicular Cancer AwarenessVisit our site to explore our work:website: www.mannedupconvos.com