listening SUPERPOWER podcast

How do we develop a listening culture that helps us listen more effectively to create better relationships in our personal lives and at work? One way is through listening training using meta-cognitive strategies. Learning how to listen to our listening behaviors WHILE we are listening, so that we can grow and adjust for more impact. Laura Janusik helps individuals and teams better align their communication through the Power of Listening. She is considered a worldwide expert in teaching and training listening based on her 20+ years of being a scholar, researcher, teacher, and trainer. She is currently helping leaders in the private industry as well as ICF certified coaches. In this episode, Laura shares fascinating multicultural listening behaviors across the world and how this helps us lay the foundation to find common ground to understand each other, allowing for better communication. She also highlights that for change to happen and for diversity, equality, and inclusion to be truly felt, listening should be tied down to the organization's bottom line because that's when better results happen. She shares stories, research and strategies for leaders to develop a listening culture. "The better relationships we have with people are developed through better listening." - Laura Janusik Listen IN Notes: 07:11 - Laura's listening program: I've got 12 different chapters. And each chapter is based on research, and it targets a different area. 09:39 - Fascinating perceptions on turn-taking and silence in other cultures 12:40 - The confusion that comes with intercultural communication behaviors 15:24 - Creating communication patterns that help us understand multicultural listening behaviors 17:32 - Important elements of listening: First, that listening is a habit. Second, a study found four dominant listening habits. 19:13 - Explaining the four dominant listening habits: Connective, Reflective, Analytical, Conceptual 22:33 - The blindspot that opened up for Laura with her analytical listening habit 23:29 - Laura's experience of the power of listening that had a huge impact on her 29:48 - Practicing listening in her work: working in leadership development with both individuals and leaders, or with leadership teams to develop listening cultures. 32:01 - Mindblowing listening experience: to see that other people could see different things and feel different things and understand different things while we were all looking in and experiencing something together. 34:45 - Laura shows interest in doing research on the metacognitive listening strategies 39:49 - Leaders need to understand listening: One of the most important things to recognize is that perception is reality. 41:31 - How leaders can support a listening environment: It really needs to come from the top down. Once we are better able to tie listening to the bottom line through the research, I think that we'll see a lot more organizations wanting to become listening-centric or listening-focused. 43:39 - The challenges facing the diversity, equality and inclusivity (DEI) movement 46:18 - Goal of communication versus the goal of listening 48:56 - Message of inspiration from Laura: It's never too late to become a better listener. Key Takeaways: "That's what gets really confusing with intercultural communication because we use our own norms to judge whether the other person. And we then make so many incorrect assumptions of what's going on." - Laura Janusik "When you see how you're listening, you recognize what your blind spots are, what you haven't been listening for, and what you've been allowing to just strain through your strainer. And you begin to understand why other people on your team have very different interpretations than you do. Because they prefer a different listening habit." - Laura Janusik "The quality of listening determines the quality of relationships." - Laura Janusik "Whenever you're going to change a culture of listening, you have to start at the top." - Laura Janusik "It's irrelevant how good of a listener (leaders) think they are. Instead, we have to look at their direct reports and their colleagues, and how the leader is perceived by them, because that's how they're showing up as a listener." - Laura Janusik "I like to help leaders understand right off the bat HOW OTHERS perceive them is much more important than how they perceive themselves." - Laura Janusik Notes/Mentions: The Echo Listening Profile: https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/10904018.2019.1611433 The Listening Space: A New Path to Personal Discovery by Tamsin Hartley - https://www.amazon.com/Listening-Space-Path-Personal-Discovery/dp/0995785406 Connect with Laura Janusik: Website: https://www.listeningtochange.com/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCoHQJLiTvAX7vHlj4p4AHMw Online course: https://laura-s-school-a5d9.thinkific.com/ Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

Leadership can get lonely. And when under pressure, it's often hard to be vulnerable in front of your team members. It can feel like the weight of decision-making and responsibility falls all on you. What if there were another way. One that could create a transformative culture where everyone is heard and valued, giving rise to enthusiasm and engagement, growing a better and stronger organization. Authors Michael Gingerich and Tom Kaden co-lead the organization Someone To Tell It To, whose mission is to cultivate meaningful relationships through compassionate listening and training others to do the same. They have recently launched their new book, Listening 2by2: A Paradigm Shift for Leaders', showing how listening to stories is a powerful tool In this episode, Tom and Michael share how they strive every day, either at home or in the workplace, to listen with intention. They also talk about their book and the story of a CEO's leadership journey, where they paint a culture of listening as a paradigm shift that can create unexpected magic for an organization. It creates an atmosphere where people feel safe to express themselves and their vulnerabilities, they are heard and known better, relationships are deepened, and people are more valued. And this leads to success in an organization. "In order to listen well, you have to believe that the person is worthy of being heard. That's what we believe is at the top." - Tom Kaden Listen In Notes: 01:06 - Experiencing a powerful impact of listening two-by-two: Having two team members listen to them as leaders about some of the burdens carry as the CEOs that not everyone else knows about. It's just so healing for us. And, we found just a lot of comfort and safety. But it's just nice for us to be the ones being heard. 07:28 - Describing the new paradigm shift of listening 2by2: If we are not listening, we are not hearing what others need. We're not hearing their ideas, we're not understanding their feelings, we're not really paying attention to them, really not valuing them, really not enabling them to be the best people they can be. That's a picture we want to paint that we want to show people that listening needs to be at the very top of everything we do. 14:02 - How does listening 2by2 create that sense of safety: It helps to give more courage to whatever needs to be said, whatever needs to be shared 17:28 - How they vet the listening pairs in their organization so that they get along well and see things in common and divergent ways. 19:47 - How having different perspectives complement more and become very helpful 22:21 - Listening with intention can change culture: If you ask those you lead how they'd like to be treated, and then intentionally listen to their answers, and respectfully consider them, you will have the beginning of a transformed culture that helps people be excited and enthusiastic about their work. 25:33 - They describe the acronym LISTEN from the book: the value that we've assigned to the last letter N is Notice. The CEO in the book, began to notice his employees. And that made a huge difference. Then that also translated to home, where he noticed things about his children, about his wife. And their relationships improved. And he was happier. 27:44 - Noticing others creates an opportunity to notice oneself and the different layers to oneself that needs work 28:31 - Listening as a facilitator of change: It's exciting to see team members who are excited about what they do, who constantly strive to do better, who constantly want to be their best, and have new and creative ideas all the time because it's safe. 30:15 - The paradigm shift that happens when you become the story seeker in listening 33:31 - The huge impact leaders bring when they know how to care: To know that others know who we are makes a huge difference. 34:36 - Simplifying self-care for leaders: At the end of the day, it's all about people. It's all about relationships. 35:56 - How Tom and Michael practice self-care as leaders in their organization 38:40 - Advice to leaders who want to be better at listening in their organization: The more observant we become and the more sensitive to the environment around us, the more clarity and insight we'll find. 41:11 - Inspiring words from Michael and Tom: The best leaders lead from a place of humility. Key Takeaways: "To listen two-by-two, with 2 listeners, we have the safety of each other. In that safety, it enables us to be more open and vulnerable." - Michael Gingerich "We're trying to create this culture in our workplace that is very open, that is communicative, that is empathetic, that is compassionate. That is kind. Are we perfect at it? No, there's always work to be done." - Michael Gingerich "Leadership is about developing others and understanding their strengths and their weaknesses. And finding the combination of team members who complement each other. The best way to do that is to listen. "- Michael Gingerich "The atmosphere can be so much better, so much more fulfilling if we indeed do know one another. And they know us." - Michael Gingerich "If you're not making empathy and compassion and listening top of mind as a leader in your organization, we can guarantee that you're not going to be in a leadership position for very long." - Michael Gingerich "Listening is where it starts. And listening is where it needs to continue. And listening is where it ends." - Tom Kaden "Sharing the weight of leadership is so life-giving. It keeps us from burning out. It keeps us from experiencing tremendous amounts of stress." - Tom Kaden "Everyone needs to tell their story. And everyone's story matters." Tom Kaden "It's important to look at each person in front of us as someone of value, and to respect them. Because if we don't believe that, if we don't believe that they have value and that they have a voice that needs to be expressed, we really won't listen to them." - Tom Kaden Notes/Mentions: Listening 2by2: A Paradigm Shift for Leaders (That's When the Magic Happens!) by Tom Kaden and Michael Gingerich: https://www.amazon.com/Listening-2by2-Paradigm-Leaders-Happens-ebook/dp/B09LYSW6LX One Minute Manager by Ken Blanchard: https://www.kenblanchard.com/Store/The-New-One-Minute-Manager Connect with Michael Gingerich and Tom Kaden: SomeoneToTellItTo: https://someonetotellitto.org/ Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

Have you ever asked your child, your student, your employee, your organization, your customer…. How do you experience our leadership? How do you experience this policy? How do you experience me as a parent? And what would you like to experience? In this episode, Shariff shares examples and stories as to how to shift dynamics in communication in teacher-student, parent-child, leader-employee or any type of relationship through the exchange of feedback around what has been experienced. Listening in this way can lead to a deeper understanding of the situation, more impactful decisions and an overall shift in mindset allowing for all voices to be heard. He also talks about how to ask powerful questions that not only connect the dots and dig deep, but also help move us into action, paving the way for creative problem-solving for a better, more just and fulfilling future. Sharif El-Mekki is the Founder and CEO of the Center for Black Educator Development. The Center exists to ensure equity in the recruiting, training, hiring, and retention of quality educators that reflect the cultural backgrounds and share common socio-political interests of the students they serve. The Center is developing a nationally relevant model to measurably increase teacher diversity and support Black educators through four pillars: Professional Learning, Pipeline, Policies, and Pedagogy. So far, the Center has developed ongoing and direct professional learning, mentoring, and coaching opportunities for Black teachers and other educators serving students of color. Whether you are a teacher, a parent or a leader, this episode is full of practical examples that can support all of us in shaping an inclusive and just world where all voices are listened to and acted upon. "If we listen to hear, listen to understand, and listen to learn, that's a different way to lead. And ultimately, that is a mindset that can help us march towards a path that's far more just." - Sharif El-Mekki Listen IN Notes: 02:32 - What we should pay attention to Thinking time, reflection time. 03:11 - The kinds of questions we need to ask children to allow them to build their own paradigms 08:52 - Helping human beings develop empathy: 'Managing themselves' is also understanding others, as well. 10:20 - A story of impacting the community, organization, and school by listening to student voices. 13:24 - Crucial to establish the organization, continue to grow, and improve: working in the community with each other, sharing thoughts, sharing ideas, and giving collective feedback. 14:11 - Being seen, heard, and listened to as your authentic self: They interviewed 100 black teachers, and collaborated around a report based on the feedback. The report, "Who We Are", helped with retention efforts of black educators in the United States. They're more likely to stay if they have a culture that's affirming, with leadership that is committed to racial justice. 23:35 - Reflecting back: As we develop educators, cultural competence is important but even more important is cultural proficiency. 28:48 - Communicating by listening through feedback 37:04 - A moment of significant change: Being invited into the profession [teaching] and really seeing the connection between educational justice, racial justice, and social justice. 41:57 - Listening to justice: If we're really seeking justice, then we are going to make sure that we're listening, we're hearing, we're seeing folks who are aggrieved by our leadership, from our policies, from our procedures, from the culture that's been established. 43:33 - Mustering and practicing the courage to listen: It can start small, asking people for feedback. A lot of things can actually be practiced with your inner circle, spaces you feel safe and brave. 55:58 - Having a just system for trust and listening to thrive and brave spaces created: It's around setting goals, being transparent, and acknowledging their experience. 56:16 - What a 'lift and climb concept' looks like 01:02:51 - Looking at human beings, regardless if they're immigrants or refugees as owners of their destiny, not as change agents. Key Takeaways: "I sometimes think out of frustration; we just want to solve the problem. We want to address whatever the child was experiencing and how it manifested, like an inappropriate response. And that's very likely true at that moment. But we also have to be curious about what are the other things that occurred." - Sharif El-Mekki "When we're talking about building communities, and classrooms, and schools, and neighborhoods and recreation centers – it's about community. How do we work together? How do we spend time together? How do we interact with each other? All of those can inform our values…and can help us improve ourselves as well as our general interactions with others." - Sharif El-Mekki "What they (human beings) want from their leadership is a commitment to improving transparency, support, and receptivity to feedback." - Sharif El-Mekki "One of the tenets of our work is, we're not just pushing into schools, and teaching a course, teaching one on one look but we're also engaging high school youth to be part of the solution." - Sharif El-Mekki "My mother is my first teacher, and I love to quote about what she said, "Something precedes peace. And it's justice. If you want peace, fight for justice, because justice will surely give birth to peace."" - Sharif El-Mekki "Listening, with actual hearing, can support justice, because the people, the aggrieved, can share how they're experiencing things." - Sharif El-Mekki Notes/Mentions: Zora Neale Hurston: https://www.zoranealehurston.com/about/ Mary Church Terrell: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mary_Church_Terrell Frederick Douglass: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frederick_Douglass Connect with Sharif El-Mekki: Website: https://phillys7thward.org/# Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/8-black-hands/id1471646189 Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

We live in a world of ever-changing team dynamics. How do we use listening and communication as a tool to help individuals and teams adapt well to change, manage conflicts and challenges, learn and grow? How do team structures influence finding solutions to big challenges while creating meaningful people experiences? And what are the various ways we foster listening to help us in decision-making? Heidi Helfand is the author of the book Dynamic Reteaming. She coaches software development teams using practical, people-focused techniques, with the goal of building resilient organizations as they double and triple in size. Heidi is currently VP of Engineering at Kin Insurance, which offers affordable coverage to homeowners in catastrophe-prone regions. Her 20+ year career in SAAS launched Procore Technologies and AppFolio to IPO and Expertcity to acquisition by Citrix. She was on the original development team that built GoToMeeting and GoToWebinar. Heidi is based in Southern California. In this episode, Heidi shares how she nerds out with listening because it is hard and a life-long practice. She highlights that to have effective communication, it pays to give someone the space for them to articulate what they want to convey. Often, solutions can be found which help craft decisions, whether their or yours. She also talks about her book 'Dynamic Reteaming' which focuses on building effective teams amidst continuous team change. "People are going to come; people are going to go; your teams are going to change. Focus there. Don't go for the quest for stability, because it's unrealistic." - Heidi Helfand Listen IN Notes: 03:22 - On discovering the power of listening: You rediscover the power of listening all the time, if you take the time to stop talking and try to focus on another person or what's going on around you, you get clues that might surprise you. 03:46 - A moment she was surprised by the clues when she stopped talking: When you're talking to another person, and you leave space, they most likely say things or offer solutions to their challenges that you wouldn't have thought of. 05:44 - Leveling the playing field and getting all voices heard: suggesting self-management strategies 08:26 - Facilitation techniques for small and bigger groups so that all voices are heard and everyone's participation is encouraged. 13:02 - What makes listening important: be generous with your attention, it might really be life-changing for the other person because they feel like its a gift, especially when they have experienced otherwise. 15:03 - What it feels like for Heidi to experience that gift of listening 16:50 - Talking about her book on dealing with team change: Dynamic Reteaming by Heidi Helfand 21:07 - What she thinks about team change: When you find that team chemistry, which I think is almost magical, in some cases, you want to keep it . But just like other things, nothing stays the same; enjoy it while you have it. 22:24 Sharing how writing her book was a process of discovery and how she used grounded theory. 26:32 - Building a communication strategy around a structure: You have a picture of the current state and the future state. And then you write an FAQ document as one structure. Then you talk to different groups of people and iterate this document that tries to bring everybody to the same point of understanding about this change that we're going to have. 38:42 - Heidi's advice to a new manager: You might not feel like you're always prepared from the start when you're doing something new. But you don't have to be perfect. You're going to learn along the way. 41:51 - Inspiring words to hear from Heidi: It's a busy world right now. It can feel quite chaotic and overwhelming, with everything we're dealing with, with COVID, with working differently. Take care of yourself, prioritize your health and your family's health, and just do the best you can. There are a lot of new challenges that we're facing, globally. Give people a little grace and space and allow for messiness. We're all in this together. Key Takeaways: "I think you can reteam for learning and fulfillment to get into a better place. We want people to feel like they're excited to come to work each day, they're working and they're learning, and they're challenged. And it's an enjoyable experience." - Heidi Helfand "You might not get it right the first time when they join a team. But in talking with people, listening to what they want to do, where they want to go. Really cultivate a kind of career conversation and you can figure out how you can best support them." - Heidi Helfand "I try to listen as the default. Sometimes it's hard if you're particularly excited about a topic. You might want to get your words in. But I find that if you leave the space, it just allows other things to happen, and that's probably a good thing because it's more collaborative." - Heidi Helfand "You want to engage people in problem-solving, so they come up with their solutions. They figure out how they want to roll them out, and then they reflect on them and try to apply this as learning going forward." - Heidi Helfand "I do always think you need a persistent visual of all of your people in teams. This is not an org chart. I'm talking about the software development companies that work in cross-functional teams; how you're organized is important. And I just like doing that in an open, accessible way, like a Google sheet where anybody can make changes to it. Because as the teams change and own their change, people are going to move around. And so everybody keeps this shared thing updated." - Heidi Helfand "It's always this continual need to…refocus out and pay attention to other people. (When you focus and listen), it helps make decisions that help you figure out what to do." - Heidi Helfand Notes/Mentions: Dynamic Reteaming by Heidi Helfand: https://www.amazon.com/dp/1492061298/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_PFYJ9Z3G4YAG9H54MPS3 Brene Brown: https://brenebrown.com/ Daring Greatly: How the Courage to Be Vulnerable Transforms the Way We Live, Love, Parent, and Lead : https://www.amazon.com/Daring-Greatly-Courage-Vulnerable-Transforms/dp/1592408419 The Advantage: Why Organizational Health Trumps Everything Else In Business by Patrick Leoncioni: https://www.amazon.com/Advantage-Organizational-Everything-Business-Lencioni-ebook/dp/B006ORWT3Y The Leader Lab: Core skills to become a better manager, faster: https://www.amazon.de/Leader-Lab-Tania-Luna/dp/1119793319 Connect with Heidi Helfand: Website: https://www.heidihelfand.com/ Email: heidihelfand@gmail.com Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

What would happen if we would stop talking past each other and start becoming listeners just like astronauts who went to the moon? Discover how to listen like the Astronauts who went to the moon. Not only was it a life or death critical skill, listening also transformed how they understood the the world, humanity and their own existence. We can all learn from the simple techniques they used to achieve what no other person had before. An award-winning investigative reporter, Author Basil Hero speaks about what he discovered about the power of listening in his book "The Mission Of A Lifetime: Lessons From The Men Who Went To The Moon". He shares stories and lessons from the twelve remaining Apollo astronauts who went to the moon, asking questions that no one had asked them before. In the in-depth interviews, they spoke about their true source of courage, leadership, and the quiet patriotism that it took to risk their lives going to the moon. They urge us to reframe our view of Earth to theirs where having "no identifiable nations, borders, or races; just Earthlings working together as a collective civilization". Basil talks about how these astronauts had the powerful ability of observation and listening. In this episode, you will learn about these skills, alongside the simple techniques they used to manage stress and communicate clearly, which can be valuable to us in our everyday professional lives. He also shares their narratives and discusses how their experiences influenced him and others to become better individuals for this planet and its people. '[on the Apollo 13 accident] There was no manual to be issued to the rest of the world on how to solve a problem and not panic. It's a real lesson in how to listen… or die." – Basil Hero Listen IN Notes: 00:51 – The lessons the 12 astronauts that landed on the moon learned from their experience: both philosophically and spiritually. How did their experience influence their perception of listening, silence, and life in general? 11:30 – Believing in something greater than oneself: Being a citizen versus a consumer, which one are you? 21:17 – What made the 12 people who went to the moon different? 24:00 – Simulating for contingency: Narratives on the special kind of communication mission control and the astronauts have, as well as the lessons we can take from these. 27:15 – Basil's advice to humanity: If we were to listen to the voice of humanity right now, what would it be saying to us? 32:35 – Raquel on lessons from the men who went to the moon: how humankind can pull through even in a crisis moment. 33:22 – Connect with Basil and know more about his book,' The Mission Of A Lifetime: Lessons From The Men Who Went To The Moon'. Key Takeaways: "You don't go to heaven when you die, you go to heaven when you are born." – Jim Lovell to Basil "Listen to the birds singing. Listen to the wind. There is this notion of listening. Listen to nature."– Basil Hero "Sometimes, the less you say and the more you listen, when you speak, it may have more of an impact on people." – Basil Hero "What listening requires is having a completely open mind – absorbing the information that is being thrown at you then you respond accordingly." – Basil Hero People/Resources Mentioned: Bill Moyers: https://billmoyers.com The Mission Of A Lifetime: Lessons From The Men Who Went To The Moon: https://www.amazon.com/Mission-Lifetime-Lessons-Went-Moon/dp/1538748517 Apollo 13: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Apollo_13 Apollo 13 [ movie] - https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0112384/ Jim Lovell: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Lovell Connect with Basil Hero: LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/basilhero Website: https://www.basilhero.com Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

How can we teach and nourish children so that small changes have a significant impact on their transformation as well as helping our planet? And what do growing plants and listening have in common for this transformation to be possible? Stephen Ritz is an internationally acclaimed, award-winning educator, author of best-selling book, The Power Of A Plant and Founder of Green Bronx Machine. Known as America's favorite teacher and 2015 Top Ten Finalist for the Global Teacher Prize, Stephen is responsible for creating the first edible classroom in the world. He and his students have grown more than 130,000 pounds of vegetables in the South Bronx, were celebrated at the Obama White House three times, have been featured on the cover of TIME for KIDS, and are the subject of a new, full-feature documentary, Generation Growth. Stephen is now appearing in the new PBS educational series Let's Learn with Mister Ritz, was named the 2020 Change-Maker Award by NYC Food Policy Center for his response to COVID, named a 2021 Food Hero by TMZ Live, and was awarded the 2021 Artemis CEA Disruptor Award for his work, advocacy, and impact in public schools across NYC and America. In this episode, Stephen shares how farming and listening to the smallest of things are crucial in healing ourselves and our planet. Just like the plants, both need to be cultivated between planting the seed and growing them. As with our children -- to realize their goals and aspirations, there has to be nurturing in between. "The power of a soft, gentle voice really enables people to tune in. I always say, in this world of social media and so much negativity, we need to learn to separate the noise from the signal and really clue into what the universe is telling us. It's a remarkable way of doing business and going forward and finding your little place and your little piece on the planet." - Stephen Ritz Listen IN Notes: 00:42 - Stephen being a big believer in meeting people where they're at: by looking and by listening. 02:26 - How the small things in life can bring peace and tranquility; listening to children being a critical piece -- they're making noise because they want to be heard. 04:10 - All it takes is one good, succinct message. 08:05 - Compassion as the key to tuning in to the signal of the kids. 09:56 - There are always three sides to a story: one side, the other side, and the truth. 11:07 - Why should the basic rules of life still apply despite changing technology? 12:30 - How do gardening and listening enable you to pause for a cause? 14:57 - What the beauty of farming teaches us how to nourish children. 16:35 - That one question that people are asking Stephen. 18:21 - Appreciation he receives from children that is worth life itself. 19:25 - Stephen shares what he wants people to hear. 21:44 - One thing Stephen wants us to think about and make a change in the way we treat children. 22:23 - Stephen talks about the Green Bronx Machine and its purpose: We grow vegetables, our vegetables grow students, our students grow the schools, and our schools grow happy, healthy, resilient communities. Key Takeaways: "For me, compassion is the new curriculum. And compassion starts with hearing voices. I believe every child has a voice, and every child has a story. And our stories are our ladders to success. And if we listen, we learn, and if we learn, we share." - Stephen Ritz "In terms of tuning into the heart, into the emotion, including content, you want that content coming in a soft, gentle manner." - Stephen Ritz "Learning to be kinder, learning to be gentler, learning to slow down so that the wheels hit the ground enables you to go much faster." - Stephen Ritz Notes/Mentions: Watch 'Let's Learn with Mr. Ritz': https://greenbronxmachine.org/letslearn/ Green Bronx Machine: https://greenbronxmachine.org/letslearn/ Connect with Stephen Ritz: Website1: https://stephenritz.com/ https://www.facebook.com/StephenRitzOfficial https://twitter.com/StephenRitz Website 2:https://greenbronxmachine.org https://www.facebook.com/green.BX.machine/ https://twitter.com/greenBXmachine https://www.youtube.com/greenbronxmachine https://www.instagram.com/greenbronxmachine/ Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

Enjoy this inspiring conversation with author Laura Hargraves, an ASHA-certified speech-language pathologist with an extensive background in the rehabilitation and healthcare field. Recently, her career has focused on public school settings, allowing her to observe how the need for listening skills has become even more critical. And more importantly, what we can do about it. For kids, the way we deliver the message impacts how they listen and absorb what we say. In this episode, Laura shares examples of how cohesiveness of voice, facial expression, and body language are important factors to consider, if we want children to understand our message. By paying more attention to communicating with our whole selves, we can bring about change that leads to more understanding, clarity and connection with children. Teachers are also surprised about how they have more space and time to do what they love...teach. Laura share's ideas for listening curriculum that can not only create magic, but give us more time to enjoy the magic. "Be attentive to the whole message and the whole person that you're communicating with. Because that makes all the difference. And that's where the magic happens." - Laura Hargraves Listen IN Notes: 00:49 - When did she start to acknowledge the power of listening: it was so much easier to get adults to attend to what was being said, to really listen to the message and hear it and take it in, versus when working with children. 03:19 - How do children listen differently: they're paying attention not only to what you're doing with your face, but what you're doing with your body, and whether or not you're actually attentive to them as the child. 06:47 - Avoid sending children mixed messages and learn how to develop a signal to support listening. 13:08 - Real listening vs. pretend listening 13:58 - Defining general comprehension and listening comprehension in different ways than what teachers were used to doing. 16:51 - The heart of the matter in listening: Instead of asking them to repeat back directions specifically, get them to repeat back what they're actually going to do as how it relates to the direction or the situation. This will give you better understanding of how much they listened and what their comprehension is. 18:03 - How a little girl's drawing helped her express her needs. 22:41 - Lessons learned from listening to children that parents can also use: Giving the child the ability to express themselves. 30:29 - A dream Laura wants to come true: Just like we have curriculums for reading, writing, and integrating kids into scholastic works, we need daily listening curriculum for students, to help them focus on what listening really is. And it can be fun. 33:53 - Why pay attention to signals that are happening even with adults 36:34 - The effect when listening fails between adults and kids 38:48 - How a safe environment provides an opportunity for kids to ask questions and listen more: If we're not encouraging people to ask questions, for clarity, for what we've heard, and what we've listened to, we're never going to get a clear answer. 41:24 - What you can see in families that encourage question asking 42:48 - Laura shares a better way to respond instead of when a teacher says, 'You weren't listening, so I'm not going to restate it': It is important to encourage an exchange, which improves their listening skills. 44:18 - What helps children listen: Listen to them. Because when you're listening to a child, you actually have to go back to that child and find out,' Is this what you really meant?' 45:05 - Talking about what her book titled 'That is Not What I Said,' 48:06 - Becoming more culturally attuned with language and words used as it varies in meaning from country to country. 49:19 - When does the magic happen? Key Takeaways: "If kids are just giving you words, but they don't understand the meaning of those words, or they haven't listened to the meaning of the whole message, they're not going to get it right." - Laura Hargraves "Parents are really good at telling kids what to do, telling kids how to be, telling kids information but not necessarily checking in with the child to make sure that they've registered that information." - Laura Hargraves "If we step back, and just literally take moments to listen to our kids and listen to ourselves, the chaos actually reduces, and our kids' understanding and our connection with them improve so dramatically." - Laura Hargraves "We have to show them how to really communicate when they're not listening or when they don't understand things. So we can give them the information, so they become better listeners. So that as adults, they're not adding extra filters to things, which then leads to misinformation and misunderstandings." - Laura Hargraves Notes/Mentions: That is Not What I Said: Listening is Magic by Laura Hargraves: https://www.amazon.com/That-Not-What-Said-Listening/dp/1098366174 Connect with Laura Hargraves: laurashargraves.com Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

Imagine what could be possible if we learned to listen first? Better flow, understanding and win-win solutions that transcend cultures, beliefs, and languages. Leaders can learn how to provide a safe space and trust for a challenging conversation, which allows for a more dynamic interaction among team members, empowering them to seek solutions themselves and become proactive rather than reactive. Colin Smith, also known as The Listener, shares stories and gives practical tips as to how to listen with deep impact. He has an innate ability to listen to people deeply and hold space which enables people to open up and share their concerns, feelings, ideas, etc. His varied background, view of the world, and inquisitive and curious mind enable him to share unusual, thought-provoking, yet grounded observations and alternative approaches to business, people, systems, and change. In this episode, Colin shows the many facets of how people are literally "dying" to be heard, and he shares how we can manifest a listen first attitude in many ways and with every opportunity we have. This approach is how we get people to also listen to us. Listen first, listen always, all ways. All the different ways you can listen, always do that. Because we're all dying to be heard." - Colin Smith Listen IN Notes: 00:40 - The moment he noticed the power of listening: The idea of disruptive dialogue is you sit with someone for two or three hours, you have a deeper, meaningful conversation, you ask lots of good questions. And it really gets them thinking because it's an unusual conversation. 05:36 - What made people notice he had a gift for listening: It's not about DOING listening. It's about BEING a listener. It's about how you arrive, how you show up, your presence, your intention underneath all of that. 09:52 - Sharing his deep thoughts about disruptive dialogue and how it shifts the environment into something that opens doors for interactions and flow of ideas. 14:21 - What happens when a leader gets genuinely interested in what others have to say in a meeting? 17:15 - How do you make people listen to you? 20:25 - What does it take to have that clarity of communication? 24:43 - One beautiful moment about listening that he didn't really expect 27:05 - Transforming the word 'conflict' in a different perspective that makes sense 28:48 - Creating trust and safety around difficult conversations 34:45 - What Colin wants leaders to learn about listening. 38:51 - Differentiating hearing from listening 40:51 - What he wants listeners to take away from listening versus hearing: Don't try and fix the problems. Let them come up with something that they think. 42:23 - The best thing about being the listener: "When I listen first, at the end of it, they can actually go away from a conversation thanking me for such a great time and telling other people what a great time they had. Actually, I say, all I did was listen. And that's because it is so unusual. It's seen as special." 44:15 - What Colin discovers about himself in this conversation with Raquel: I appreciate your listening because you've enabled me to think better and come up with some new ways of expressing what I express. 46:33 - Is there a rule to follow when you listen first? Key Takeaways: "If we all learn that idea of listening first, then we start listening without judgment, with curiosity, with interest, with equality, with ease. Then everything flows much better." - Colin Smith "When you're listening, the most important thing is to BE a listener. And that's really different. It's about how you arrive, how you show up, your presence, your intention." - Colin Smith "When we take the time to be interested and genuinely interested in the other, we might get a surprise." - Colin Smith "Just because I have an answer doesn't mean it's the right answer. Let me ask you what you think first." - Colin Smith "Sometimes I just need to be able to vocalize what I'm saying." - Colin Smith "Do we care about someone to enable us to listen? Or could we listen fully, and as a result, we'd end up caring about them." - Colin Smith "How much could be listened to from someone? And what we really get from the conversation is often a very different message." - Colin Smith "There are no rules. We know if we instinctively are present with someone, we will know what to do. We'll know what to say. We'll know when to add in our bit. Because it feels right. And it will feel congruent to the person who's speaking." - Colin Smith Notes/Mentions: 10 Ways to Have a Better Conversation by Celeste Headlee: https://www.ted.com/talks/celeste_headlee_10_ways_to_have_a_better_conversation In Search of Excellence: Lessons from America's Best-Run Companies by Thomas J. Peters: https://www.amazon.in/Search-Excellence-Americas-Companies-Essentials/dp/0060548789 Brenee Brown: https://brenebrown.com/ Jane Adshead-Grant: https://listeningalchemy.com/2021/02/15/the-transformativepower-of-generativelistening-with-jane-adshead-grant/ Connect with Colin Smith: dexteritysolutions.co.uk LinkedIn Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

What does it mean to listen with your heart, not just your head? And how does this help us work at a deeper level with diversity, equity and inclusivity so that we can impact real change? Dr. Teri Varner is an academic visionary with garnered experience in teaching, mentorship, and curriculum development to meet specific educational goals. A decorated educator with demonstrated expertise in communication theory, nonverbal communication, public speaking, and active listening. She is an Associate Professor of Communication at St. Edward's University (Austin, TX). She holds a Ph.D. in Communication with an emphasis in Performance Studies from the University of Texas at Austin. Her ethnographic qualitative research interests range from women of color in American higher education to hair/body politics to increase the amount of classroom instruction devoted to teaching students how to actively listen in the 21st century. Dr. Varner is an active member of the National Communication Association (NCA) the International Listening Association (ILA) and Southern States Communication Association (SSCA). Her current research examines metacognitive listening strategies and takes a qualitative look at strategies that United States American students report using before, during, and after a listening event. In this episode, Teri shares how when we are given an opportunity to use our voice, we can use it in its full capacity, to help each other, to speak up for what is right and just. She highlights how we need to give listening the time and space necessary to dig deep into where the other person is coming from for deeper understanding. "What's important to me is that I would rather risk you thinking...there's something wrong with me...because I've asked you so many times. I am more concerned about getting it right than being embarrassed that I'm getting it wrong." - Teri Varner Listen IN Notes: 01:10 - Teri remembers when she experienced the power of listening in a circle of women from all across the world. The key component was this idea of listening not just with your head, but really listening with your heart. 04:53 - As a newbie experiencing the listening workshop for the first time, with other women talking about what it's like to be from a marginalized community where people are often dismissive. She was amazed about our capacity as human beings to be sympathetic and empathetic. 06:37 - What is this 99/1 rule as coined by Dr. Carol McCall? 08:34 - On being a university chair for three years at St. Edward's University, the first African American department chair. 10:34 - Lessons she learned from being a university chair: expect the unexpected. 16:49 - Looking at listening in relation to action: Diversity, Equity, Inclusion 22:16 - Why it takes so long for diversity, equity, and inclusion to take its roots. 25:39 - How to allow space and time for listening: When it comes to listening, being authentic -- making sure that there's time for you to listen. 30:38 - Teri's mantra to make sure she's giving time and space for listening: You have my undivided attention. 32:13 - How to know when you have a full understanding after listening? 37:22 - Helping others understand: "I am asking you to repeat something because I want to understand fully. That's the strength. That's courage." 44:39 - Finding one's voice through listening: The power of lecturing with a microphone. Becoming more conscious, cognizant of how her voice is resonating throughout the room and with her students. It has made her think about what she will say next. 48:39 - How taking time to listen to our voice helps. 52:39 - Talking about the speech which was authentic, sincere, and with power that she gave when she received an educator award: "When I wrote the speech, I wrote it thinking that if I never had another opportunity to address this group of people, this is what I would want to say." 55:02 - Teri's final words: Speaking truth to empower. Key Takeaways: "What is this 99/1 rule? ...99% of what they are talking about that might be causing you what your perceived as harm, or is making you angry is 99% about them. And only 1% is you. And you just happened to show up." - Teri Varner "Sometimes it may not be enough these days just to listen when we say that we have a background in listening; it might also be that there are times when as a result of listening, we really need to be proactive." - Teri Varner "To be both reaffirming of diversity, equity and inclusion, we want to include everyone, but still, celebrate our uniqueness and the challenges in between." - Teri Varner "Empowered listening is about knowing that you are devoting your energies to simply showing up for that person and not focusing on anything else other than what that person is sharing with you." - Teri Varner "If you don't understand what somebody has said, don't pretend, don't make it up. Just ask for help." - Teri Varner "When I decide that I'm going to take ownership and have control over the quality of the sound of my voice, then giving speeches or making presentations might not seem as daunting as it would have otherwise." - Teri Varner "If you have a voice, make sure that you use it to its full potential." - Teri Varner People/Resources Mentioned: Dr. Carol McCall: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drcarolmccall/ Connect with Teri Varner: LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/teri-l-varner-ph-d-64463226 Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn

It doesn't matter what background you have, or what type of job you do or the experiences you have, imagine what could be possible when you learn how to listen to your creativity? Robbie Bach, who is best known for founding and leading the team that created the Xbox did just this. And this process surprised him with his first novel, a thriller The Wilkes Insurrection, published in 2021. Today he is an entertaining storyteller and catalyzing voice who writes books and speaks to audiences on leadership, creativity, strategy, and civic issues. During his twenty-two years at Microsoft, Robbie worked in various marketing and business management roles—including supporting the successful launch and expansion of Microsoft Office and leading the creation and development of the Xbox business. Then as Microsoft's President of the Entertainment and Devices Division, he was responsible for the company's worldwide gaming, music, video, phone, and retail sales businesses until he retired in 2010. He currently chairs the board of the Bipartisan Policy Center. He also serves on the national board of governors for Boys and Girls Clubs of America and Magic Leap, an augmented reality company. He previously served as a board member of the US Olympic and Paralympic Committee, Sonos Inc., Brooks Running Company, the Space Needle Inc., and Year Up Puget Sound. He is the co-owner of Manini's, Inc., a gluten-free pasta and baking company. In 2015, he published his first book, Xbox Revisited: A Game Plan for Corporate and Civic Renewal. In this episode, Robbie shares stories about how he learned to listen to his creativity in order to write his first fiction. And you might be surprised at his process. Learn how to shift working with your strategic brain to listening to your creative brain and how may take an unexpected path as a story unfolds. He also reflects on what he has discovered this year through writing the book and how this is connected to leading a team, self-awareness and collaboration. Even though the book is a fiction, he hopes that when readers put the book down, they walk away and have learned something. He would like to hear from you about this! "You have to be able to listen to yourself and to listen to what's going on inside your head, which is a weird process. It's just not natural, honestly. But very powerful." - Robbie Bach Listen IN Notes: 01:02 - The first moment that he started to notice the power of listening: We're literally sitting on two little chairs, about a meter apart. And each person is supposed to talk about something deeply emotional and meaningful to them. And the other person is supposed to listen and give them feedback cues without saying anything for a full minute. 02:55 - What has been most challenging for most leaders: Figuring out how to listen completely and not just pretend you're listening, but actually hear what the person is saying, understand the process and continue to process it before you respond. 04:02 - He shares his experience learning to listen his creative side: It was a challenge for me to listen to a different part of myself, and a different part of my brain -- a part of my brain that was not about strategy and marketing and communications, messaging and those types of things, but was instead about this creative story, which turns out to be an action thriller. 06:27 - What was the shift to listening to his creative side: You actually have to listen to the emotive part of your brain. 09:37 - The way he developed the characters in the book: Creativity is not a solo act. I had a couple of different forms of interaction to help me. 12:17 - Discovering how listening to ourselves, even if it seems egocentric is a very powerful lesson to learn: "I have to listen to myself.' 15:10 - How his second book turned into a thriller without intending to: I decided to write out of my fears. 20:00 - The one thing that surprises him the most writing the book 21:08 - What is an 'author's art' 22:21 - Commonalities in writing a book and leading teams and groups in a corporate setting 24:31 - One piece of advice he shares: This concept of self-awareness. And really, as best you can, try to understand who you are as a person. 26:25 - The Avengers Theory of Leadership: superpower is the thing that makes you uniquely talented. In addition to knowing your Avengers superpower, you have to know your kryptonite. You have to know the things that you are uniquely bad at. 28:35 - What is Robbie's superpower? 30:22 - Talking about the confession he wrote on LinkedIn 33:22 - The type of change he is mining: Productive constructive engagement and how to do it in a way where people listen, hear what others have to say, and then collaborate. 35:06 - What is the goal of his fiction book, The Wilkes Insurrection? 37:54 - A tip on how to listen more. 41:23 - The Wilkes Insurrection launch date 42:31 - Robbie's final message: It's okay to think about myself as an individual and do things that are good for me. But at the end of the day, I have to think about what's good for the community, as well. Key Takeaways: "I haven't talked to a single author who uses the same process for writing their books. You have to have your way." - Robbie Bach "I think it would be incredibly more valuable as a worker, as a friend, as a leader, if you actually understood yourself better." - Robbie Bach "You can't create a self-awareness of who you want to be, you have to create a self-awareness of who you are." - Robbie Bach "It's really incumbent as leaders and as people to understand what our superpowers are and to be honest with ourselves, about what we are truly great at." - Robbie Bach Notes/Mentions: Book: The Wilkes Insurrection by Robbie Bach:https://wilkesinsurrection.com/ Connect with Robbie Bach: Website: https://www.robbiebach.com/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/robbiebach61 Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/robbiebach Twitter: https://twitter.com/robbie_bach Connect with Raquel Ark: www.listeningalchemy.com Mobile: + 491732340722 contact@listeningalchemy.com LinkedIn