Your Kickstarter Sucks

This podcast covers a range of interesting topics including enhancing animal brains, embarrassing donut mishaps, funny movie scenes, bad breath Spider-Man, Kickstarter campaigns, film lawsuits, Hello Fresh cooking, a breathing device called the lung master, a potty training device for dogs, Classic Studios podcasts, dad jokes, AI projects, artificial intelligence in TV shows, accessing adult content on the White House network, animal communication, starting a religion, privacy-focused smartphones, phone vulnerabilities, illegal crypto trading, and privacy features.

Quick! You’ve got 60 seconds! TO LAUGH! Well we oughta have you covered on this week’s episode which, although I’ve not seen the final runtime just yet, I would have to imagine is north of 1 minute long and ought to contain at least 1 giggle-worthy joke. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium…it’s more important now than ever before! Well, it’s probably the same amount of important as before, but this month you’re gonna feel real glad you took the plunge. This Friday, Miketober IV: Hole-O-Ween beginsThis week’s YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:Athletic Greens - It’s (clap) flu (clap) and (clap) cold season! Let’s protect ourselves with all the usual stuff - washing the hands, masking the face, never leaving the house, etc. and then add onto it some immunity-supporting vitamins! After all, your car can’t go without gas (some do, I guess). Vitamins = gas. Well, AG1 has all the human body gas you could need, in a fun and fruity little package. Head to athleticgreens.com/yks for a 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packsFactor - I need meals, and I need ‘em now! It don’t get more convenient than Factor Meals…just ask our very own Mike Hale (please don’t bother Mike). We’re all fans of Factor here at YKS HQ, and you will be too, once you get a taste of that yummy stuff known as food! Mosey on over to FactorMeals.com/YKS50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off. That’s code yks50 at FactorMeals.com/YKS50 to get 50% off!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Humorous discussions on astrology, zodiac signs, and sex positions. Crude remarks and explicit discussions on bathroom accidents and a TikTok video. Critiques of self-serve coffee kiosks and innovative cooking appliances. Mocking a Kickstarter campaign and disbelief in a study about changing attitudes towards cooking. Introduction to the Acorn Ad Block and speculating on ad-free streaming. Discussion on a mysterious mountain router and a new type of cooling fan called the true fan. Exploring the concept of working with big names and a new self checkout app. Importance of neighborly package arrangements.

Aliens spotted in Mexico! AI run amok! Weird church guys have their own dating app! It’s Monday morning in America, and these are today’s headlines. Okay I actually just looked at today’s headlines and they’re mostly about Drew Barrymore’s morning show. So we’ll probably get into that on today’s show, as well as Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez appearing in adorable new BFF selfies…very nice! Plus we’ve got a tabletop game project so strange that we don’t just look the other way when walking past the guy talking about it, a peanut butter device for true peanut butter freaks, and economic justice. Basically a bunch of crap. That’s what you like, right? Well there’s plenty of it. So download the show and then listen to it on your phone speaker while taking public transit. That’s The YKS Way!  Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Want more YKS? Then you need YKS Premium. Nuff said. Actually I would also say that there’s hundreds of hours of bonus YKS, and it’s all yours and all ad free. And our best month of the year is coming up, chock full of fabulous guests. And it’s a great way to support the perfect guys who make the show you love more than anything. And what if a mysterious old crone appeared to you in a dream to say you should listen to it? YKS Premium. Nuff said. This episode is brought to you by these fine brands:Factor - “I did everything right. And they eated me!” - My meals. Calorie smart, keto, Vegan, Protein+, Factor’s got something for everyone. And me? I greedily lap it up. Check it out for yourself, and it couldn’t be simpler. Get 50% off with code YKS50 at Factor.com/YKS50 Athletic Greens - Travel’s coming up! I guess just for me, but plenty of other people will be flying around too. I can only hope that they’ve taken their AG1 and Vitamin D, as I will have. What a way to start the day, even if it’s 3am and I’m standing in a big long line! We’re all smiling in the line, thanks to AG1. Get a free 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/yksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey! Put down your phone! And put down the other thing that might be in your hand right now! It’s time for another YKS! On today’s program, we’re discovering the intricacies of language, exploring many new and exciting beverage options, and, yes, talking about whacking off. Plus, we’ve got a really cool way to keep peepee off your potty, champagne that even losers can enjoy, and some good old fashioned snake oil. And I’m not talking about that other kind of snake oil! Oh brother! Just enjoy the show…Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium! The place for all demons in a tube! Last week we checked out what some of our friends in the church are doing with all the money we’ve been sending their way, and the results are kind of not too good if we’re being honest! This week, we’ll be joined by our even more satanic friends Libby Watson and Pat Gill to discuss the mysteries beyond the stars and plains…UFO Cowboys!This week’s YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Factor - I love my meals, and yours! Because I know they’re all from Factor, the place that will send you food in the mail that’s good to eat. Now normally the mail is where you get letters and junk, but not anymore! Factor has reinvigorated an American institution and also will send you a chicken burrito bowl. That’s what’s up. Go to FactorMeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your orderNordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

And it’s orange!!! No, I’m not talking about the former Mister Diet Coke In Chief, but rather some kind of stupid little fuckin thing you plug into your phone (???) And it Helps You. By letting you call someone else. If they’re, like, super close. Okee doke!! On today’s program, we are changing social media (if our other ideas don’t work out or make sense), drinking some stuff out of a mug (no handles, convenient), and planting some flowers (on the ceiling, hell yeah!) That would be more than enough for one show, but we saw fit to do approximately 3 more things I think. And knowing us…that’s just the beginning. Well hopefully you have enjoyed this episode description as much as I have enjoyed writing it. And oh yeah, there’s a whole show to listen to as well! Not as good as this of course. But still, not too bad. Well, now I need to go to the bathroom. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium. Buy It. Hear It. Love It. At patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksThis week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Athletic Greens - Yes I’m traveling, and yes I need my damn Vitamins! And I wouldn’t dare do either, without Athletic Greens. Get 5 free travel packs and 1 year supply of Vitamin D at athleticgreens.com/yksHelloFresh - Why not eat the food if it’s hot and you like it? With HelloFresh, it’s Hot, it’s Fresh, and It’s All Up To You. Go to hellofresh.com/50yourkickstartersucks and use code 50yourkickstartersucks for 50% off plus 15% off the next 2 months!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Hey there! Have ya heard bout Nowee? And the great Fluuhhd? Wale, we’re talkin’ about that today a little bit, and of course those dang ol’ iPods too. Plus, we’re innovating wallet technology back to the early 2000s, kissing our birds, flipping wallet chains with CIA guys, and of course, rocking out! Tell your pappy, it’s a new episode of YKS! Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium…a place you can go to whenever you close your eyes, randomly type in the 9 or 10 or whatever digits of some credit card number, and press enter! For more episodes of YKS, access to the Discord, and much more, sign up today! And that will presumably fix some problems we are all having (??)This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:Mint Mobile - Ring ring…it’s time for savings! Ring ring was the sound of your alarm going off, not the phone ringing. You’re one of those people who has their alarm sound like a phone ringing. You definitely march to the beat of your own drummer. But hell, so does Mint Mobile. To get your new unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, and get the plan shipped to your door for FREE, go to MintMobile.com/YKSFast Growing Trees - If I am being perfectly honest, when I search my heart and hold nothing back, I realize that Slow Growing Trees would have been fine with me. But thank goodness my small mindedness didn’t stop the audacious crew of Fast Growing Trees. My flowerbeds have you to thank. To get FIFTEEN PERCENT OFF your entire order, go to FastGrowingTrees.com/YKSSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Old Navy slammed my debit card! That’s just one non-sequitur featuring a name of a company we have no relationship with, which will nevertheless be auto-populated as a sponsor on dogshit AI websites around the net. Here’s some more: Linus Tech Tips, Husqvarna, and the government of the People’s Republic of China. Let’s see what kinda discount code we can cook up with that. On today’s show, our very own Mike goes Spooky Boy mode, we learn a lot from Motivational Speaker Instagram Bald, and we fire everyone who works for us and doesn’t have a six pack (doesn’t apply to co-owners). Plus, we’re membering stuff, tracking our, uh, treasures, and proving the existence of psychic abilities once and for all, with Google Docs. You can hear all that and more by grabbing our RSS feed, asserting a relationship with us, and becoming unresponsive to emails – right now – on an all-new YKS!Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium is where you’re gonna wanna go for more YKS, if you’re into that sort of thing. Beach Party, Jessuary, Miketober, and of course all the episodes where we literally have no idea what we are doing and just sort of flail around for an hour (those are our most popular ones) await you! This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine sponsors:Factor - “Hell, I could eat”. We’ve all said it. But when the rubber meets the road, sometimes we have a hard time figuring out what, exactly, it is we are supposed to slug down! Well that’s why Factor got invented: It’s food that you eat! Why not, if it’s hot and you like it? Get 50% off your order at Factormeals.com/yks50Athletic Greens - Yooooooo!! I love taking AG1 in the AM. And that’s a fun mnemonic device to remember it as well, which I’m throwing in for free. Get 5 free travel packs and 1 year of Vitamin D, which many are saying is “the goated vitamin”, at AthleticGreens.com/YKSNordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

YKS 3:16 says I just downloaded your ass! I forgot to say that in the episode so putting it here will poopsimply have to do. On today’s show, we’re joining Club Cool with Jukebox Ron and sending a  tribute to J. Lo. Plus we got a coffee product that somehow is not intended for everyone on Earth to drink, a probably-illegal brain scam, some guys who would fall for a brain scam, a Christian TV show so bad I don’t think even Christians would watch it, and more. It is at this point that I catch a couple of seltzer cans out of the air, crack them open, pour them all over my head, and kick Producer Dan right in the belly. I have won the title, and am the Big Champion of Whatever. A crazed fan slides into the studio and attempts to remove my jean shorts before being tackled by DB in a clown suit. It’s just another day taping YKS. Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. YKS Premium! That’s basically where we live. Come and say hello to us, and give us a small treat. In return we may perform one of our famous tricks (having a great guest like Kevin Banner on, or sitting there going “uhhh” until one of us remembers a joke we heard in 1st grade). $5 a month for all that, and we won’t even charge you tax (actually I do think it charges you tax).  This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:HelloFresh - In the old days, having some guy come by and toss a big thing of spaghetti carbonara on your front porch would mean you pissed off the wrong neighbors. But now it means you’ve got delicious, nutritious meals from HelloFresh waiting to get cooked up and eaten! So get with the times and sign up today – Get 50% off plus free shipping at hellofresh.com/50yourkickstartersucks with that classic code, 50yourkickstartersucksFastGrowingTrees - Plants…who needs ‘em, right? Well, wrong. The Earth needs them, and luckily I’ve got a plan. I’m going to go get the plants that are right for my zone, tap some experts for help in taking care of them, and then, oh yeah, breathe in some of that wonderful element known as oxygen. But first, I’m gonna save a little money….Get 15% off at fastgrowingtrees.com/yksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Would you like to play a game? As kids, we sure did! But you’ll be surprised to learn that Mike and I grew up a little bit differently. Smirk. I’m so inexperienced in classic gaming I thought Escape From Monkey Island was a Jane Goodall biopic. But I digress. On today’s show, Producer Dan poops in a Gatorade bottle (just seeing if he reads these), we confirm the existence of a freaky mail carrier, and we move to Ireland to avoid income tax. Plus, we’re keeping our Altoids safe on the beach (coulda used that last month!), we’re picking up puke, and we’re finally revisiting the amazing world of South Park. I wonder what they’d say if they were still producing episodes today! Ah! Probably something like “My pronouns are Cartman.” I have now been hired for the show. Enjoy.Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Well, folks, we had one hell of a month on YKS Premium. We were joined by Stuart and Dan from The Flophouse, Will Menaker, Charles, Alex, and Andrew from E1, and Zach Cherry for a month of roughly beach-adjacent films and some very roughly recorded parody songs. And this month presents a brand new challenge: how to STOP talking about the beach! Wish us some good luck and nab the archive of hundreds of similarly themed episodes at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. This week’s episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands: Factor - When it comes to this time of year, my mind always wanders to one thing: meals. And cooking them in just 2 minutes or less. Luckily, our friends at Factor have figured out a way to combine these twin loves. All you have to do is ask, “Would I like to live deliciously?” If so, Use code yks50 at FACTOR MEALS.com/yks50 to get 50% off!NordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!Athletic Greens - Vitamins are so good to have, but my problem with them is often having to slurp down some kind of nasty goo or choke on a fist-sized pill. Well fear no more because Athletic Greens has concocted a delicious tropical beverage that has more nutrients in it than I could honestly ever name. Which is why I love to Get a 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/yksSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.