Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life Podcast

This episode features guest hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce, authors of the forthcoming book The Rescuer Trap. While we take a short holiday break, we are excited to bring you a special presentation featuring our two compelling talks from the Philosophy of Love and Relationships virtual conferenceIn this episode, we bridge the gap between modern psychological traps and ancient philosophical wisdom to challenge how you view human connection:* “I Can Fix You: The CB Paradox” – Kasey Pierce explores the seductive but flawed desire to “fix” our partners. Discover why this common relationship dynamic often undermines the very foundation of the love it seeks to save.* “Stoic Interconnectedness: Kindness and Fairness” – Dr. Scott Waltman dives into the profound Stoic perspective on shared humanity. Learn how recognizing our mutual bonds can serve as the ultimate driver for cultivating genuine fairness and kindness in all our interactions.Happy Holidays! Live well and love wisely. Are you the fixer, the over-giver, the emotional first responder for everyone but yourself? Welcome to The Rescuer Trap. We playfully own the labels “Parentified and Codependent” to make a point: these are not identities, but learned behaviors.Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.And what can be learned can be unlearned. Hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce use Stoic philosophy and CBT to give you the tools to break the cycle and reclaim your autonomy. Your escape from the trap starts here. Based on the forthcoming book, The Rescuer Trap (New Harbinger).Thanks for reading Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life! This post is public so feel free to share it. Get full access to Stoicism: Philosophy as a Way of Life at donaldrobertson.substack.com/subscribe

Massimo Pigliucci, a philosopher known for his work on Stoicism and practical philosophy, joins hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce. They dive into the pitfalls of being a ‘rescuer’ and the importance of skepticism. Pigliucci discusses the brain as a 'b******t' machine, the nuanced balance of certainty and doubt, and how social media distorts self-examination. The conversation explores ethical action, the Stoic distinction between altruism and selfishness, and the value of collaboration for genuine self-knowledge.

Join Kasey and Scott as they explore the 'Rescuer Trap' mindset and its link to perfectionism. They discuss how rescuing behavior often leads to emotional burnout and the struggle to enjoy achievements. The duo highlights the importance of good-enough parenting, modeling imperfection, and clarifying values to manage perfectionist tendencies. Stoic techniques like premeditatio malorum help tackle anxiety and encourage self-compassion. Discover how stepping back in relationships can foster growth and lead to healthier connections.

Discover the hidden costs of people-pleasing as the hosts dive into how it sabotages your effectiveness. They explore the guilt of disappointing others and the pressure of unrealistic inbox expectations. Learn to reclaim your autonomy with Stoic principles and CBT tools, including how to say no without feeling selfish. The discussion highlights the health implications of chronic people-pleasing and explores the dynamics between empaths and narcissists. Embrace discomfort to reshape your priorities and allow space for personal flourishing!

Delve into the intricate dynamics of codependency and depression. Learn how the impulse to 'fix' a partner can lead to emotional sinking. Discover the importance of reciprocity in relationships and the dangers of over-helping. The hosts explore Stoic principles about control, urging listeners to break free from the rescuer role. They tackle emotional avoidance and societal pressures that fuel unrealistic expectations. Practical strategies for reclaiming autonomy are shared, challenging you to reassess your relational patterns.

Explore the intriguing concept of the 'Rescuer Trap' where over-giving can lead to emotional burnout. Discover the perils of maladaptive overcorrection and how to strike a balance between independence and healthy interdependence. Learn about the impact of avoiding relationships after trauma and how it exacerbates anxiety. Gain insights on setting boundaries not as rules for others but as self-guides. Finally, understand the importance of community in Stoic philosophy and how it leads to a more meaningful life.

Dive into the complexities of emotional dependency on AI and the allure of dating apps. Explore whether AI relationships serve as a form of avoidance and how they may threaten personal autonomy. The hosts discuss the dangers of cognitive atrophy and the importance of preserving authentic human connections. Learn practical tools from cognitive behavioral therapy to break free from dependency cycles. Reflect on the nature of modern relationships and the philosophical question: What does it mean to truly connect with another person?

Dr. Jeff Perron, a clinical psychologist and author of 'Psychology of Happiness,' joins hosts Dr. Scott Waltman and Kasey Pierce to dissect the 'Rescuer Trap.' They explore how childhood schemas like Self-Sacrifice and Subjugation shape adult behaviors, leading to people-pleasing. Perron offers insights on setting boundaries, recognizing conflicting values, and nurturing an 'Inner Sage' to combat these patterns. Delving into approval-seeking and emotional inhibition, he emphasizes the necessity of healthy self-care while balancing altruistic values.

This conversation features Kyle Shepard, a Navy resilience training expert, and Vakia, the moderator. They explore the profound connection between Stoicism and resilience. Kyle shares insights from military training on early intervention and stress management. Donald Robertson contrasts Stoicism with CBT, emphasizing its lasting impact on identity. They discuss the relevance of Stoic texts today and practical techniques for building emotional resilience, such as emotional labeling and modeling coping strategies for children.

Explore the intriguing dynamics of self-sacrifice and rescuing behavior. Discover how the sunk cost fallacy traps us into unhealthy patterns. Learn about radical acceptance and distress tolerance as keys to moving forward. Delve into the challenges of breakups, from mourning to practical steps for self-care. The conversation emphasizes the importance of recognizing when to walk away and how confronting fears can lead to growth. It’s a playful yet impactful discussion aimed at reclaiming personal autonomy.