On The Mend

Matt chats to the BAFTA Award-winning YouTube star, and campaigner, Nikki Lilly.At the age of six, Nikki was diagnosed with a high flow craniofacial AVM (Arteriovenous Malformation). A rare condition which causes life-threatening nose bleeds and extreme swelling. Since then, Nikki’s had almost one hundred medical procedures, as well as therapy, to help process the trauma and pain.When Nikki started vlogging two years later, she was spending a lot of time at home. She often felt disconnected from the world, from her peers, and she was looking for something to do. But her YouTube channel had an unexpected impact – helping her reach millions of people, while covering a range of topics, from online bullying, to chronic illness, mental health, and make-up (a big passion).Nikki was only 19 at the time of recording this conversation but she has wisdom and strength beyond her years. And she’s determined to make a positive difference by sharing her story and films.Related links:Nikki’s YouTube ChannelTik TokThe Butterfly AVM CharityNikki’s award-winning BBC documentary: Born To Vlog(01:35) Nikki on her BAFTA Award (and fear of public speaking)(04:16) Posting her first YouTube video (and dealing with negative comments)(18:49) Nikki’s time in hospital and disconnection from her peers(22:02) What is AVM? (Arteriovenous Malformation)(26:33) How therapy has helped Nikki (35:02) Dissociation and how Nikki grounds herself(37:37) Importance of alone time (42:45) Parental support (45:36) The power in make-up (51:36) Being an inspiration and advocate for visible difference Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We’re 8 episodes into series 2 of On The Mend… and what a journey it’s been so far!It’s about time we looked back on some of our best moments. So today, Matt is reflecting on the lessons his recent guests have taught him. Unpicking the key messages that have stuck with him for weeks on end – and are sure to stick with you too. We’re looking back on our chats with Geordie Queen Vicky Pattison, Alcohol-Free Advocate Andy Ramage, and Mental Health Pioneer Ruby Wax. Each had their own story to tell. From the fear of passing problems on to your kids, to understanding what ‘middle lane drinking’ is, to taking the stigma away from depression, there’s plenty for us to dive into. What’s been your favourite moment from series 2? Leave a comment. We’d love to know!(0:00) Intro(0:59) Daily Gratitude (new ice bath!)(1:51) Spending more time with my wife(3:05) Spending more time with my son(4:40) What have I learnt from On The Mend’s guests so far?(5:12) What I’ve learnt from Vicky Pattison (8:30) Is addiction genetic or generational trauma?(12:45) What Andy Ramage taught me about ‘middle lane drinking’(21:05) What Ruby Wax taught me about mental health(25:36) Outro Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Matt speaks to his very own psychiatrist, Dr James Kustow, about adult ADHD.James studied medicine, before training in psychiatry. He’s now a consultant who specialises in ADHD and has trained further in psychotherapy and nutrition. But being an expert is only half of the story. Because, like Matt, James was also diagnosed with ADHD as an adult.In this wide-ranging conversation, the pair talk about ADHD symptoms, diagnosis, the correlation with addiction, the use of medication, and the different targets for intervention that James explores, before taking a pharmaceutical approach.Related links:Dr James KustowHow to Thrive with Adult ADHD: 7 Pillars for Focus, Productivity and BalanceDr William Dodson on emotional regulationDr Carol Dweck’s Growth MindsetEFT (emotional freedom techniques)NHS Guide to ADHD(01:55) James’ training and specialism in ADHD(05:06) What is ADHD(09:50) Matt’s ADHD diagnosis(10:47) Rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD)(13:25) The clarity that comes with diagnosis (15:10) More on the symptoms of ADHD(17:50) Adult onset ADHD, and other factors (environment, hyper-mobility & inflammation)(22:18) The ADHD assessment and childhood history(28:57) James’ ADHD diagnosis(34:25) The challenge of achieving goals and completing tasks (37:42) Variations in the presentation of ADHD(41:38) ADHD and addiction(45:46) Medication(55:18) Growth mindset(59:56) Sleep, routine & ADHD(1:01:33) Taking control of your time(1:05:02) Systems to avoid feeling overloaded(1:08:30) Looking at physical health (1:11:00) Emotional regulation techniques(1:12:36) Matt’s outro Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we're getting personal! Matt is upping the vulnerability scale, as he lets the closest people in his life – colleagues, friends, and even his wife – fire a round of constructive criticism his way.Getting feedback about your flaws is extremely scary. But it's a powerful way to identify the things you need to work on. And if Matt can do it, so can all of you listening!Wherever you are in your addiction recovery journey, mental health journey, or general self development journey, this is a pitstop you'll want to take note of. (0:00) Daily gratitude(3:15) Criticism and feedback(4:52) Becoming comfortable with criticism (learn to be vulnerable!)(9:15) Learning to follow through (11:10) Stop swearing so much!(13:47) Passion being your strength and your flaw(14:53) Criticism from my wife, Emma(17:50) Advice from Jordan Stephens (Rizzle Kicks) on changing your environment(19:30) How to work on your problems(19:58) How to live honestly (22:10) Holding your partner accountable(24:32) outro   Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week’s guest is Ruby Wax. A comedian, writer, and mental health advocate, who has wisdom to spare. When she was younger, Ruby often felt lonely - like she didn’t fit in - and she turned to comedy. A reinvention that gave Ruby a taste for attention and led her to drama school, and eventually her own television show in which she met the biggest celebrities of the day.After 25 years in television, Ruby reinvented herself once again. She studied mindfulness-based cognitive therapy at Oxford University. And she now works to remove the stigma around mental health. Not least in her book - I’m Not As Well As I Thought I Was - a very personal account of depression and the adventures she followed to find meaning in her life.Related links:Ruby’s websiteRuby’s books, including I’m Not As Well As I Thought I Was and A Mindfulness Guide For SurvivalRuby’s tourWhen Ruby Wax Met (BBC series)Frazzled CafeNHS Guide to Local Mental Health ServicesMind’s Guide to Crisis ServicesEsther Perel (one of Ruby’s heroes)The Body Keeps The Score by Bessel van der KolkDr Dan SiegelSam HarrisJon Kabat-Zinn on mindfulness(02:14) Soft toy vs green juice (04:22) Ruby’s book (I’m Not As Well As I Thought I Was) (12:00) Depression, and coming off antidepressants (13:38) EMDR, ECT, and other treatments (17:19) De-stigmatising depression, while taking it seriously (20:24) Psilocybin therapy (22:41) Mindfulness and a 30-day silent retreat (28:24) Ruby’s mindfulness practice (37:36) The addict label and the victim mentality(39:55) Ruby’s heroes, including Esther Perel, Bessel van der Kolk, Dan Siegel and Sam Harris(42:17) Reinvention (and the addictiveness of fame)(45:15) Ruby Wax Meets (Pamela Anderson, Carrie Fisher, Donald Trump & Liza Minnelli)(48:42) Ruby’s tour (and playing all the parts in her book)(51:26) Matt’s outro Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Matt is putting himself in the hot seat for today’s episode! We’ve rounded up some of your most pressing questions for an honest, judgment-free Q and A session, where Matt shares some of his own personal experiences in hopes that some of you guys will resonate.We’re diving deep into the aspects of sobriety nobody talks about, how to deal with anxiety, managing family life, and much more.If you have a question that Matt didn’t cover, we’d like to do more of these! Just leave a reply in the Q and A box below.(00:00) – Introduction (00:31) – Daily gratitude (03:54) – How am I? (struggling with sleep)(06:40) – How to manage your time better(07:56) – Quick breathing exercise for anxiety (11:00) – Following a 12-step programme for sobriety (16:24) – Maintaining a schedule (18:08) – Has being in a band made addiction harder?(21:26) – Setting boundaries(23:16) – Busted tours are better sober! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Matt meets Andy Ramage, a footballer who became a commodities broker, when injury ended his career. While Andy's career was a success, something was missing. He felt broken. And so ten years ago, he embarked on a journey to transform his life.Andy realised that alcohol was impacting how he felt, and his ability to get things done. So, he set his sights on a 90 days booze-free challenge. And he’s never looked back.If you need a bit of motivation right now, whatever challenge you want to take on, Andy’s the man for the occasion.Related links:Andy’s website (with free resources and coaching workshops)Andy’s books: Let’s Do This & The 28 Day Alcohol-Free ChallengeThe Alcohol-Free Advantage Podcast with Andy RamageThe Dryy AppDryy FestNHS Alcohol Support ServicesNick Littlehales’ Sleep BJ Fogg’s Tiny Habits(01:23) Andy’s move from football into broking(05:40) Andy’s definition of “middle-lane drinking” (08:42) Wanting to try alcohol-free (and the social pressure around drinking) (14:37) Andy's diagnosis of coronary artery calcification (16:32) Living optimally alcohol-free - the health benefits (20:46) Matt’s experience of people asking him about their own drinking (21:58) Andy’s advice for starting an alcohol-free journey (moving past the excuses) (25:33) The effect that middle lane drinking has on your sleep, performance and health (31:00) What’s going on in your brain (chasing that dopamine spike(34:32) Relationships with people who aren’t alcohol-free (37:57) The red wine myth (resveratrol) and “magic grannies” (40:34) Socialising, alcohol-free drinks, and Dryy Fest (46:57) Studying in later life (48:22) Willpower and motivational psychology (49:48) Andy’s advice for building exercise habits (and core values)(54:40) The stages of change and accepting that you will slip up(58:14) Matt’s outro  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Matt is braving it for a solo episode this week! He’s stepping out of his comfort zone for a candid chat about a big part of any addict’s recovery: mental health.It’s a topic lots of our listeners have been asking Matt to open up about. So today, he’s breaking down the day-to-day practices that have helped him the most – and can help you too.Some of these habits Matt developed early on in his recovery journey. Others he’s only beginning to see the potential of today.From a beginner’s introduction to meditation, to the power of a freezing cold shower (just hear us out!), to the number one way to start your day, we hope that everyone can take something away from this conversation. (00:00) Introduction (02:29) Start everyday with gratitude(07:00) What I do for my mental health(08:45) An introduction to meditation  (14:14) Relaxation with binaural beats (16:03) Getting dopamine from cold water therapy(21:20) Get moving everyday(23:00) Changing my relationship with my past self(24:00) The power of therapy(27:47) Follow evidence over self belief  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Matt Willis returns for a second series of On The Mend. His first guest is Vicky Pattison, a Jungle Queen, whose feet haven’t touched the ground since she first appeared on our screens in 2011. Geordie Shore was a baptism by fire, at a time when reality television was “a bit like the Wild West”. Vicky was only in her early 20s, she was unprepared for the spotlight, and she created a caricature of herself to hide the vulnerable person struggling inside.But since then, Vicky has put in the work. She’s learned what makes her tick, the tools which help her anxiety, and how to navigate her own relationship with alcohol, and her father’s alcoholism. Vicky was determined to become the best version of herself, she seized the opportunity to change public opinion on I’m A Celebrity… And she wants to inspire the next generation of women to never dim their sparkle, and go after exactly what they want. This interview was recorded in March 2024, a few months after Vicky had returned from an endurance mission in the Arctic Circle, raising funds for Comic Relief. Related links: NACOA (The National Association for Children of Alcoholics) NHS Alcohol Support ServicesVicky Pattison: Alcohol, Dad and Me (Channel 4)Matt Willis: Fighting Addiction (BBC)Snow Going Back: Comic Relief v the Arctic  (BBC)The Secret to Happy: How to build resilience, banish self-doubt and live the life you deserve (Vicky’s book)Vicky Pattison: The Secret To (podcast) Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Matt Willis is joined by podcaster, charity founder and cancer activist, Lauren Mahon (and her dog, Ray). Lozza, as she likes to be called, talks to Matt about breaking the taboos around cancer, talking more openly about illnesses and death and how friends and family can really help in dark times. They discuss her own breast cancer diagnosis, which she got aged 31, her activism, her overactive brain and why sometimes you just need to go to the cinema. Lozza's podcast 'You Me And The Big C' can be found here, although she doesn't host it anymore, for reasons she discusses on the podcast. It's a very open, honest and inspirational chat, and we hope that you will find it as powerful a listen, as we did recording it. (and apologies for the swears!)If you have been effected by anything you've heard in today's episode, there are some links below for help and advice: Macmillan Cancer SupportGood Grief TrustNHS Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.