HeightsCast: Forming Men Fully Alive

In schools today, Shakespeare is often taught superficially. Students attempt to grasp the plot with the aid of their teacher, who helps them through the difficult Elizabethan English. At best they learn something about the beautification of language and the cultural significance of the Bard. But his work is not taught as it was written to be understood, that is, sapientially, for growth in practical wisdom and the ability to see more clearly the nature of man and the man's relationship with both fellow man and God. This week on HeightsCast, we welcome back Dr. Matthew Mehan for a discussion of Shakespeare and the education of leaders. Associate Dean and Assistant Professor at Hillsdale's Van Andel Graduate School of Government, Dr. Mehan helps us see that there is more to Shakespeare than is immediately apparent from a surface-level reading of his plays. He explains how a deep reading of the Bard offers a training in that nimbleness of mind—a good mother wit—without which, St. Thomas More said, all learning is half lame. To do this, Dr. Mehan walks us through the opening of Hamlet, Act V. Not only does he offer an example of Shakespeare's genius, he also gives an example of how to teach Shakespeare as not only aesthetically delightful but also morally instructive and useful—the ideal companion to theology and philosophy. For educators interested in learning more about Shakespeare and how to teach him as a teacher of wisdom, check out the Forum's summer workshop on Shakespeare. Chapters 1:00 How Shakespeare is taught in schools today 3:00 Why and how to study Shakespeare 6:03 Polysemy and the good mother wit 10:13 Literature as experience 12:55 Mirror neurons and man as mimetic 14:10 Ethical gyms and ethical gems 16:25 Shakespeare as Socrates, Nester, and Virgil 19:00 How to approach Shakespeare for the novice 23:10 Opening up the text: Hamlet, V.1 33:40 Shakespeare as teacher of self-government and liberty 35:00 Shakespeare and the American tradition 36:40 Advice for teachers 39:00 Shakespeare as a companion for life Also from the Forum Summer Workshops for Teachers Why Our Politics Needs Poetry with Dr. Matthew Mehan On Reading Literature by Joe Bissex Five Fruits of a Poetic Education by Nate Gadiano In Real Time: The Temporal Order of the Liberal Arts by Dr. Matthew Mehan On Pieper's Prudence: A Virtue for the Great Souled with Colin Gleason, Tom Cox, and Austin Hatch

In G. K. Chesterton's Orthodoxy, he tells a sort of parable in which children are given space to play on a mountain top surrounded by steep precipices on all sides. At first the children are left to play on the mountain top without any walls. Fearful of falling off one of the edges, they all huddle up in the middle. Then, walls are erected, and the security that such walls provide gives the children the confidence they need to play without fear of falling. A father's loving presence can act like such walls in the lives of his children. Yet, at times, the practical realities of life make it difficult for fathers to be fully present in such a way. This week on HeightsCasts, we feature a talk given by headmaster Alvaro de Vicente on the topic of paternal presence, originally offered at our recent fatherhood conference. Although there are no set manuals for successful parenting, in his talk Mr. de Vicente suggests four areas that fathers can consider as they examine the ways they may or may not be present in their children's lives: The importance of paternal presence The obstacles to paternal presence Professional work Personal interests Difficult children The types of presence Physical Intellectual Moral Spiritual The stages of presence Holding the hand Holding the back of the bike Holding the second steering wheel Holding the phone In the end, Alvaro encourages fathers to behave as they would wish their sons to behave when they reach their own age. But when they fail, he also reminds them of St. Mother Teresa of Calcutta's words: "God doesn't ask that we succeed in everything, but that we are faithfull.". Chapters 0:14 WelcomeStart 2:15 The importance of presence 5:00 Some challenges to being present 11:40 DSuggestions for dealing with those challenges 12:50 Types of presence 13:00 Physical 18:55 Intellectual 27:35 Moral 29:00 Spiritual 33:10 Stages of presence 37:40 Takeaways and concluding thoughts Also on the Forum Friendship for Fathers: On Living and Teaching the Art with Prof. John Cuddeback The Bedrock Principle of Fatherhood with Andy Reed The Father and His Family: On Fatherhood with Michael Moynihan Parenting from Fear: On Reasons for Confidence with Alvaro de Vicente Parental Authority: On Our Role with Dr. Leonard Sax

As the world of academia becomes increasingly polarized, parents may be concerned about sending their children off to colleges where the general culture and ethos of campus are less than favorable to the worldview and way of life found in their own homes. Yet, many of these institutions are also prestigious and hold promise for success in one's professional career. How, then, should parents think about sending their children to such institutions? How should students, who have decided to attend them, approach their time there? Fly under the radar? Be an argumentative warrior for what they think is true? To help us think through some of these questions, we welcome Nate Gadiano, Executive Director of The Heights Forum. Drawing on his experience as an undergraduate at Princeton and a graduate student at Notre Dame, Nate shares his thoughts on engaging with academic communities and cultures that differ from one's own upbringing. This podcast discussion was occasioned by a recent talk given by Mr. Gadiano for a group of parents, in which he discussed how parents can prepare their children for different college environments. In that talk, Nate gave seven principles for engaging with others in a fruitful and friendly manner: Go where you are not welcomed. Make your beliefs normal and attractive. Don't argue with strangers; discuss with friends. Prepare more than you plan. Find the heart of the disagreement. Think long term. Approach souls on your knees. In the end, Nate's message to students as they prepare for college is contained in these words: be careful that in winning an argument you don't lose a soul; be careful that in winning a friend you don't lose your soul. Chapters 1:15 Introduction 3:35 Sending your children to universities with antithetical worldviews 4:32 A caveat: know yourself 5:30 Digging into the why: service of souls 6:08 In Our Lady's secret service 7:10 Advice for high school seniors 8:10 Go where you are not welcomed 10:50 Make your beliefs normal 11:48 Answer contempt with compassion 14:00 Finding a coach and a team 16:40 Advice for difficult conversations 17:20 Prepare more than you plan 18:05 Have more than you show, speak less than you know 19:45 On preparation 22:10 On friendship with people who disagree 22:45 Discovering the hidden good 28:00 Is it possible for people to change their mind? Also from the Forum Parenting from Fear: On Reasons for Confidence with Alvaro de Vicente The Man Fully Alive: On Our Vision with Alvaro de Vicente When to Fight: On Fistcuffs and the Peacemaking Protector with Kyle Blackmer Finding Mentors After Graduation: On Find Your Six with Pat Kilner On Preparing for Bad News: Raising Men Who Can Handle It with Dr. Matthew Mehan

Parents love their children and desire the best for them. Yet at times the world seems full of dangers and obstacles to a child's ultimate good. Because of this, a certain fear may cast a shadow on the ways parents relate to their children. To discuss parenting and fear, we welcome back Mr. Alvaro de Vicente to HeightsCast. In the episode, Alvaro explains some of the dangers of being overprotective and parenting from a sense of fear. Rather, he encourages parents to prudently discern moments to give their children the space for making the right choice on their own, which of course means that they also have the freedom to make a mistake. At the same time, Alvaro offers advice on optimistic and formative ways to say "no" to one's children, when such is necessary. As Alvaro reminds us, gratitude for the good received helps one to make positive decisions about the good to be done. If families make intentional time to remember and give thanks to God for the goodness in the world, parents and children alike will be naturally drawn to that Goodness from which the world came. Chapters 0:40 Introduction: fear based parenting 2:15 Why we fall into parenting with fear 3:50 Manifestations of parenting with fear 9:05 How and when to say "no" 11:58 The middle class myth and parental anxiety 14:05 Why parents should avoid this mode of parenting 17:20 Rebellious children 19:05 Why we shouldn't be afraid 21:40 Practical considerations 27:12 The unexpected, difficult questions 30:30 Parenting with optimism Also on the Forum Parental Authority: Our Role with Dr. Leonard Sax Discipline in the Classroom: The Art of Order with Colin Gleason Friendship for Fathers: Living and Teaching the Art with Prof. John Cuddeback Parenting: Patience or Optimism with Andy Reed His Anxiety and Ours: Confessions of an Anxious Parent Who Happens to Be a Therapist with Alex Berthé

In the past twenty years, research suggests that parents are worrying more about their children and spending more to provide them with comforts. In spite of such worry and wealth, the past twenty years have also seen an increase in these same American-born children from well-to-do families being diagnosed with various psychiatric disorders. Meanwhile, parents tend to swing from overly strict to overly lenient. Balancing love, both tender and tough, is a difficult art. To help us dive deeper into this parental task, we welcome Dr. Leonard Sax to HeightsCast. In the episode, Dr. Sax discusses his book, The Collapse of Parenting: How We Hurt Our Kids When We Treat Them Like Grown-Ups. Drawing both from the wisdom of the ancients and the insights of modern science, Dr. Sax explains the importance of parental authority in raising children. Besides discussing parenting authority, he also offers thoughts on the importance of culture and schools, urging parents to consider carefully and choose prudently the school to which they will send their children. As Dr. Sax reminds us, authentic freedom is not mere license, and if children are to be free in the end, they must, at the start, have the right amount of parental guidance. To give too much freedom too soon may end in the very loss of the freedom which one would have hoped to give. Chapters 0:30 Introduction 2:15 What is parental authority? 11:00 Parental worries 19:05 Some statistics on psychiatric diagnoses in America 21:30 Parents and the transmission of culture 23:35 The middle class myth 27:52 "Elon Musk" schools vs. "Mother Theresa" schools 32:20 Shifts in American culture from 1967-2017 34:40 Approaching difficult grades as a parent 38:25 Too hard, too soft, or just right: should parents negotiate? 45:50 Advice for single parents 49:10 Fake it until you make it 53:45 The importance of intergenerational bonds Recommended Resources Boys Adrift: The Five Factors Driving the Growing Epidemic of Unmotivated Boys and Underachieving Young Men by Dr. Leonard Sax Why Gender Matters, Second Edition: What Parents and Teachers Need to Know about the Emerging Science of Sex Differences by Dr. Leonard Sax Also on the Forum Discipline in the Classroom: The Art of Order with Colin Gleason Carpool: Making Commute Time Good Time with Kyle Blackmer Friendship for Fathers: Living and Teaching the Art with Prof. John Cuddeback

Hell, Dante expresses, is being trapped by our false attempts to be free. Thus, the Comedy's Satan is forever stuck in the ice of a lake made frozen by the beating of his wings as he attempts to "free" himself from the reality of God. Education, on the other hand, frees us from such a lake by leading us to embrace, with the fullness of our being, the Truth which sets us free. This week on HeightCast we welcome Dr. Joseph Lanzilotti for a discussion of what Pope Benedict XVI can teach us about such an education. Drawing especially from the late pope's 2008 address to educators at The Catholic University of America, Dr. Lanzilotti explains how hope and the beauty which engenders it rests at the heart of Pope Benedict's response to what he called a crisis of education in the modern world. Moving between theology and praxis, Dr. Lanzilotti focuses our attention on the nature and calling of educational institutions, both as they relate to the Church and to the world at large. Beyond places of data transfer or ready-made success measurable by test scores, such institutions are meeting places that reverberate with the life of the Church. They are places where students encounter the truth and especially that Truth which is found in prayer. They are places where beauty—the splendor of truth—can reverberate first in the hearts of students and then in the families and communities where they are called to serve after graduation. Chapters 1:23 Introduction: Pope Benedict XVI's address to educators 2:40 The virtue of hope and education for the future 6:22 What does it mean to be a Catholic educator? 11:00 Restoring the fullness of Truth, Goodness, and Beauty 13:30 The importance of why questions 14:30 The communal dimension of education 19:10 Egalitarian elitism and intellectual charity 21:35 The intellect and the will 25:15 The will and our heart 28:25 The interaction between affectivity and the human heart 30:50 Moral truth 33:55 The adventure of education 37:53 Both for Catholic institutions and Catholic teachers who are not in Catholic schools 40:15 Concluding thoughts: more than a facade Additional Resources Introduction to Christianity by Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger Truth and Tolerance: Christian Belief and World Religions by Joseph Cardinal Ratzinger "Joseph Ratzinger as Doctor of Incarnate Beauty" by Tracey Rowland "Address to Educators at The Catholic University of America" by Pope Benedict XVI "Letter on the Urgent Task of Educating Young People" by Pope Benedict XVI "General Audience on Prayer and the Holy Family of Nazareth" by Pope Benedict XVI "Message on Silence and Word: Path of Evangelization" by Pope Benedict XVI Also on the Forum Order and Surprise: On Beauty and the Western Tradition with Lionel Yaceczko Artwork in Schools: On the Buildings that Build Us with Joe Cardenas On the Education of the Human Heart with Anton Vorozhko

What does it mean to be "civilized"? What is justice? What is a citizen? Given the opportunity, would you have killed Julius Caesar? Was Nero inevitable, or is it possible to keep one's wits while running such a powerful empire? These are a few of the questions that eighth graders at The Heights are challenged to ponder together in their core class. With the help of their teachers and a new history textbook, the boys not only consider these questions amongst themselves but do so in dialogue with some of the greatest thinkers of the Western tradition. This week on HeightsCast, we discuss Tom Cox and Bill Dardis's new book, Becoming Rome: Foundation, Republic, and Empire in the Words of Eminent Romans. In addition to sharing the story behind their writing, Tom and Bill introduce us to their method of teaching history at the primary and secondary school levels. Drawing on fourteen years of experience in the classroom as well as graduate studies in the liberal arts, Tom and Bill offer practical insights for teachers who hope not only to bring history to life in the classroom but also to prepare their students to bring those lessons into their own lives. Chapters 0:32 Introduction 2:00 A better approach to the history textbook 4:50 The big questions hidden in the narratives of history 7:00 The contemporary approach to history lessons 9:56 Receiving tradition and engaging it 11:00 Why study history at all? 15:50 A roadmap to history 19:15 Method of the book 24:23 Seminars and discussing difficult topics 28:15 Why write a book? 31:32 The book's target age level 32:45 The relationship between Christianity and the book Also on the Forum The Importance of Ugly History by Mark Grannis Keeping the Story in History by Mark Grannis Seeing History: On Using Images in the History Classroom by Kyle Blackmer Hillsdale's M. Spalding on the Importance of History Pt. I with Dr. Matt Spalding Hillsdale's M. Spalding on the Importance of History Pt. II with Dr. Matt Spalding Plutarch's Lives Teach: Character Education through Story with Tom Cox History the Way it Was…and the Way it Should Be by Bill Dardis Writing and Thought; Oratory and Ethics: What We Give Our Seventh Graders in the Core with Tom Cox

As teachers and parents, it is often difficult to find the balance between leniency and strictness, love and fear. Getting the right tone, being firm in principle and flexible in preference, is indeed an art and an especially difficult one. While nothing can replace personal experience for growing in this art, self-reflection is a great aid to this end. This week on HeightsCast, Mr. Colin Gleason, Head of the Lower School, offers an aid to our personal reflection. The episode features a presentation by Mr. Gleason from our recent Art of Teaching Conference. At that conference, he spoke to seventy men from across the United States and beyond about how we, as teachers, can foster an environment of respectful dominion in the classroom. Colin offers a list of twelve principles, together with a great many practical pointers and delightful anecdotes. In the end, the point of discipline is to foster the right tone for learning, the proper culture for growth. Whether this growth occurs in the home or in the classroom, having the right tone is ultimately about love. Rome, they say, was not loved because she was great; she was great because she was first loved. So too our sons and students. Chapters 2:25 Beginning with the end 3:50 A question of balance 6:35 Principle #1: Discipline begins before class begins 8:32 Principle #2: Best disciplinary tool is a good lesson plan 12:25 Principle #3: Fostering class culture is more effective than listing class rules 14:40 Principle #4: We earn capital outside to spend inside 17:05 Principle #5: Smiling isn't enough; we need to laugh 19:45 Principle #6: Let them love what they see and fear what they don't 24:45 Principle #7: Don't confuse personal preference with principles 25:40 Principle #8: Non-correction corrections 27:35 Principle #9: Replace star stickers with handshakes 29:15 Principle #10: Learners over lessons 31:25 Principle #11: Replace line-writing with push-ups 34:30 Principle #12: When you send students to the principal's office, your authority goes with them Also on the Forum Boys, Education, and The Heights with Alvaro de Vicente Raising Contemplative Sons: The Problem with Boys with Colin Gleason Our Little Protectors: How Do WE See Our Boys? with Alvaro de Vicente On Recess: The Benefits of Free Play with Colin Gleason Toughness for the Adolescent Boy by Kyle Blackmer Seeing Our Boys with Loving Eyes: Not Projects, but Persons with Tom Royals Why Boys Need to Be Given Freedom by Andy Reed Material Order and the Middle School Boy with Kyle Blackmer Can I Catch It?: On Handling Wildlife with Eric Heil *For lyrics and history of the Ave Regina Caelorum, please visit adoremus.org.

It's not merely where you are going, but how you get there, that matters. And as we often find ourselves going places in cars, it is worth stopping to consider how we spend our car rides. In this week's episode, we welcome back to the podcast Mr. Kyle Blackmer for a discussion of the daily commute. Whether we carpool or ride solo, Mr. Blackmer helps us to reframe how we approach this daily endeavor which can easily become, at best, dead time and, at worst, dreaded time. Kyle shows us how the car, with the right attitude and a little creativity, can become its own classroom. He encourages us to think about how we can best use this time by praying, engaging in good conversation—at times mere fun, at other times more formative–, listening to good music and books, and celebrating. Chapters 00:45 Introduction: reframing the daily commute 3:20 How can we make carpooling more fruitful for our sons? 5:43 The car as a classroom: the first and last period of the day 6:22 Four modes of teaching in the Car 6:45 Prayer, especially the Rosary, especially in the morning 9:28 Car as a place for friendship, shared life 10:55 Conversation in cars 16:20 The art of asking good questions and listening 17:15 Tuning into the boys in front of you 19:16 Setting guidelines for your carpool 21:10 Being intentional about what you listen to 25:35 Audiobooks and classic rock 27:50 Celebrating the in little ways 31:20 Finding moments for little points of correction 33:30 Advice for solo commuters 35:50 The last three minutes: preparing for your return home Recommended Audiobooks for the Road The Mysterious Benedict Society by Trenton Lee Stewart Seabiscuit by Charles Rivers Editors Boys in the Boat by Daniel James Brown The Wind in the Willows by Kenneth Grahame Treasury for Children by James Herriot Little House in the Big Woods by Laura Ingallas Wilder The Jungle Book by Rudyard Kipling Tarzan of the Apes by Edgar Rice Burroughs The Once and Future King by T.H. White The War of the Worlds by H.G. Wells The Complete Father Brown Collection by G.K. Chesterton A Canticle for Leibowitz by Walter Miller Also on the Forum On Home as Social Hub: The Importance of Hosting Our Sons and Their Friends with Tom Royals Friendship for Fathers: John Cuddeback on Living and Teaching the Art with John Cuddeback Sarah Mackenzi on the Read-Aloud Family with Sarah Mackenzi

In a recent national survey of adults in America, a striking sixty-one percent of young adults (age 18-25) reported feeling serious loneliness. Such feelings of loneliness were also accompanied by anxiety and depression. Although humans are by nature social animals, it would seem that forming deep friendships may not always come so naturally. How do we form friendships? How do we help our sons form friendships? What even is friendship? To help us answer these questions, we welcome to HeightsCast John Cuddeback, professor of philosophy at Christendom College and Life Craft writer and speaker. In this episode, Professor Cuddeback helps us understand what friendship is, how to practice the art of friendship, and how friendship goes hand-in-hand with happiness. As he explains, friendships do not merely happen. Rather, they require intentional cultivation and sustained effort. Indeed, like any art, the art of friendship requires discipline and practice. Specifically, Professor Cuddeback focuses our attention on how a husband can form a deep friendship with his wife and a few male friends, as well as how he can help his children to grow in their own friendships. Being a father first, he may one day become a friend of his adult children. As Professor Cuddeback explains, true friendship is the only way to overcome loneliness in life. And, in the end, it will be in sharing our lives with friends that we come to find the ultimate meaning of our lives. Chapters 1:25 What is friendship? 4:15 Different kinds of friendship 9:05 Friendship and human flourishing 11:05 Happiness today 14:00 The activities of friendship 19:40 The number of friends 24:40 Friendship for the twenty-first century father 28:00 Selecting friends 33:30 Friendship with your spouse 41:10 Friendship with other men 44:30 How to prioritize relationships 47:15 Parenting and friendship 50:47 How to coach our children in forming friendships 55:37 Advice and encouragement for single mothers Resources Life-Craft.org True Friendship: Where Virtue Becomes Happiness by John Cuddeback Nicomachean Ethics by Aristotle Spiritual Friendship by Aelred of Rievaulx Treatise on Law by Thomas Aquinas Also on The Forum Cultivating Friendship in the Classroom by Austin Hatch On Friendship after Senior Year: Higher Stakes and Beautiful Opportunities with Dave Maxham Friendship for the 21st Century Boy with Alvaro de Vicente On Home as Social Hub: The Importance of Hosting Our Sons and Their Friends with Tom Royals