Sound Mind Set

Today, as we close out our focus on the illusion of control and the reality of God being in control, especially in the area of our parenting and connected relationships, a fair question for us to ask is this: “Okay, God, if You are in control, when will you take total control? Like take away all our false ideas and futile attempts to be in control for ourselves?”Listen once again to Paul, this time in Philippians 3:20-21 … But we are citizens of heaven, where the Lord Jesus Christ lives. And we are eagerly waiting for him to return as our Savior. He will take our weak mortal bodies and change them into glorious bodies like his own, using the same power with which he will bring everything under his control. (NLT) So we live in a time when God offers His control of our lives as a choice. One option among thousands. But when we choose Him, two things become a reality. First, we live on the earth, but our citizenship changes to Heaven. And second, we live for the day when the choices end and He takes everything over. Whether we die first or He comes back, we will witness Him “bringing everything under His control.” Meanwhile, today, right now, no matter how tough life gets, no matter how unfair life may seem, we can choose Him, choose His power, choose Heaven.Listen to today’s passage in the Message Bible … But there’s far more to life for us. We’re citizens of high heaven! We’re waiting the arrival of the Savior, the Master, Jesus Christ, who will transform our earthy bodies into glorious bodies like his own. He’ll make us beautiful and whole with the same powerful skill by which he is putting everything as it should be, under and around him.This week, how did your view of personal control change?How did your view of God being in control change?And, as always, the biggest question for any of us, what do you need to give up and give God for your best and your kids best?Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, thank You for the hope and the promise, whether here or in Heaven, that the best is always yet to come. Please help me to remember that truth when everything seems to go wrong and I want to give up. Just help me to give it to You. As above, so below.”

When we feel like life or parenting, or schedule, or money, or all of it is out of control, we really mean out of our control, don’t we?It’s very important in those moments to evaluate what is in control. Living in a fallen world, so often we see sin controlling things. Selfishness, self-serving, self-gratification. The crucial thing to do is take an honest look at our own lives and ask, Is sin controlling anything in my life that I need to give to God?Listen to Paul in Romans 6:11-14 …So you also should consider yourselves to be dead to the power of sin and alive to God through Christ Jesus. Do not let sin control the way you live; do not give in to sinful desires. Do not let any part of your body become an instrument of evil to serve sin. Instead, give yourselves completely to God, for you were dead, but now you have new life. So use your whole body as an instrument to do what is right for the glory of God. Sin is no longer your master, for you no longer live under the requirements of the law. Instead, you live under the freedom of God’s grace. (NLT) As you heard this passage, did anything come to mind? Did any part stand out to you? Did God speak to you, even if it was just a quick flash in your mind?If sin is a master, and masters want to control, then what great news to hear we have the option to live in freedom. To be free of control or the need to control … anything … anyone.Listen to this passage again in The Message Bible … When Jesus died, he took sin down with him, but alive he brings God down to us. From now on, think of it this way: Sin speaks a dead language that means nothing to you; God speaks your mother tongue, and you hang on every word. You are dead to sin and alive to God. That’s what Jesus did. That means you must not give sin a vote in the way you conduct your lives. Don’t give it the time of day. Don’t even run little errands that are connected with that old way of life. Throw yourselves wholeheartedly and full-time—remember, you’ve been raised from the dead!—into God’s way of doing things. Sin can’t tell you how to live. After all, you’re not living under that old tyranny any longer. You’re living in the freedom of God.If this passage is true, then let me ask you … what are you not free from today? If something, someone, or any situation quickly comes to mind, how can you apply today’s truth to open your hand, release your grip, and hand it over to God?Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, thank You for Jesus, Thank You for Your love. Thank You that You have defeated sin. My sin. Thank You for my freedom. Help me to walk in it—today. As above, so below.”

If there is any story in the Bible that shows the lengths a human will go to stay in control, do his own will, and avoid God, it’s the story of Jonah. It’s funny how over the years we have made this entire book to be all about the apparent bad thing of getting swallowed by a whale, when in reality the whale was sent by God to save the man from self-destruction. That metaphor can be used a lot in all of our lives.Listen to Jonah 1:1-4 …One day long ago, God’s Word came to Jonah: “Up on your feet and on your way to the big city of Nineveh! Preach to them. They’re in a bad way and I can’t ignore it any longer.” But Jonah got up and went the other direction to Tarshish, running away from God. He went down to the port of Joppa and found a ship headed for Tarshish. He paid the fare and went on board, joining those going to Tarshish—as far away from God as he could get. But God sent a huge storm … (MSG) Okay, yes, God sent a huge storm, but didn’t Jonah actually bring the storm on himself?Let that sink in for a moment.Of course, there are bad things that happen to us that are no fault at all of our own. But then, if we are going to be honest, how many storms do we need to admit we started or had a hand in starting?Back to the story, I guess sitting in the digestive juices of a whale causes you to re-think your choices, huh?Listen to just one chapter later …I was as far down as a body can go, and the gates were slamming shut behind me forever—Yet you pulled me up from that grave alive, O God, my God! When my life was slipping away, I remembered God, And my prayer got through to you, made it all the way to your Holy Temple. Those who worship hollow gods, god-frauds, walk away from their only true love. But I’m worshiping you, God, calling out in thanksgiving! And I’ll do what I promised I’d do! Salvation belongs to God!” Then God spoke to the fish, and it vomited up Jonah on the seashore. (Jonah 2:6-10 MSG) Is this story a reminder of any situation in your own life? Maybe one from years ago or one you are in right now? So, are you on the ship … in the whale … or standing on the beach, wiping the vomit off?When we find ourselves out of control, and can even point fingers at other’s poor choices, all we can do is what we can do about ourselves. We have to ask, what part of this do I need to own? And then, we have to learn to recognize that even when a situation may stink, God brought it to us for a reason to get us where He wants us to go. Because He loves us, wants to save us, and He is the One in control.Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, help me to not run from You, no matter what life brings, to accept that You are in control of me and You love me—always.” As above, so below.”

In the Book of Ecclesiastes, Solomon in all his wisdom worked hard to figure out why life is completely out of his control, even as a powerful king. In his writings, he was frustrated and angry and cynical and flippant and sarcastic. Does that sound familiar at all? Thank God that He gave us such a wide variety of people and circumstances in His Word to show us the collision between the divine and the human.Listen to Ecclesiastes 8:7-9 in The Message … Yes, there’s a right time and way for everything, even though, unfortunately, we miss it for the most part. It’s true that no one knows what’s going to happen, or when. Who’s around to tell us? No one can control the wind or lock it in a box. No one has any say-so regarding the day of death. No one can stop a battle in its tracks. No one who does evil can be saved by evil. All this I observed as I tried my best to understand all that’s going on in this world. As long as men and women have the power to hurt each other, this is the way it is.Can you relate to any of Solomon’s words?When we can’t actually control anything about life but we want to, we usually end up hurting one another, trying to control each other. And we have to be so careful that we don’t end up trying too hard to control our kids. Control is never the point of parenting.Let’s fast-forward to the end of Ecclesiastes where Solomon finally resolves his search for truth.The words of the wise prod us to live well. They’re like nails hammered home, holding life together. They are given by God, the one Shepherd. But regarding anything beyond this, dear friend, go easy. There’s no end to the publishing of books, and constant study wears you out so you’re no good for anything else. The last and final word is this: Fear God. Do what he tells you. And that’s it. (Ecclesiastes 12:11-14 MSG) So, evidently it’s okay to run through all of our crazy, mixed-up emotions and express our cynical and sarcastic opinions of how life treats us. Because what matters most after the process is where we end up. Better, not bitter. Realizing we will never be God and He always will be. And that will always be a great place to land.Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, please help me to realize I can vent with You as my Father. I can tell you exactly what I think. You already know what I’m thinking so I may as well just voice it. But remind me in those moments that all I am saying is that You have to be in control—and to thank You that I’m not. As above, so below.”

One of the toughest things we have to deal with in life is when something we care about is taken completely out of our control. Then anytime it involves our kids, that adds a heightened level of emotions. And if you add issues like hurt, distrust, betrayal, and being unfair, all of life can quickly seem unbearable and confusing.Fortunately, the Bible has a lot to say about these very human dynamics because we all deal with them, more than we ever want to. For that reason alone, we have to learn where to go for help.In chapter 30 in the Book of Proverbs, King Solomon gets very real about life while talking to God … I am weary, O God; I am weary and worn out, O God. I am too stupid to be human, and I lack common sense. I have not mastered human wisdom, nor do I know the Holy One. Who but God goes up to heaven and comes back down? Who holds the wind in his fists? Who wraps up the oceans in his cloak? Who has created the whole wide world? What is his name—and his son’s name? Tell me if you know! Every word of God proves true. He is a shield to all who come to him for protection. (1-5 NLT) Bottom line here … When life wears you out, just admit you are fragile, you don’t know everything, don’t know what to do, don’t know what God is up to, but also … if He has created everything and is control of all you see, then He knows what to do with your life and will protect you … even, yes even, when it does not feel like it.This passage is not to be taken as someone speaking from a poor self-image, but how we feel when life gets out of our control. All to remind ourselves who we are not and who God is.Listen once again:I am weary, O God; I am weary and worn out, O God. I am too stupid to be human, and I lack common sense. I have not mastered human wisdom, nor do I know the Holy One. Who but God goes up to heaven and comes back down? Who holds the wind in his fists? Who wraps up the oceans in his cloak? Who has created the whole wide world? What is his name—and his son’s name? Tell me if you know! Every word of God proves true. He is a shield to all who come to him for protection. (30:1-5 NLT) What feels totally out of control in your life right now?Here’s the odd, yet good news … if you can admit it’s out of your control, then maybe it’s totally in God’s control? Why don’t you take a minute and invite Him to take over anything you are struggling with? Right now.Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, I guess feeling like I’m in control of anything is just an illusion, huh? Would you take over everything right now—the things I think I’m controlling and the things I know are completely out of my control? … As above, so below.”

The toughest thing about trying to live as a Christ-follower is being beat down by the world, all the while knowing Heaven is a reality waiting for us one day. But it’s hard to see Heaven when we feel like Hell is constantly on our doorstep, isn’t it?We know that God, who raised the Lord Jesus, will also raise us with Jesus and present us to himself together with you. All of this is for your benefit. … That is why we never give up. Though our bodies are dying, our spirits are being renewed every day. For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever! So we don’t look at the troubles we can see now; rather, we fix our gaze on things that cannot be seen. For the things we see now will soon be gone, but the things we cannot see will last forever. (NLT) When things are tough, especially inside your own family and dealing with your kids, try and remember this life is temporary … in several ways … one, your children are growing up and there will be a day when they will leave home, and two, there will be a day that Heaven will move from a someday thing to a reality. So hold onto it all loosely and maybe a little less intensly.Listen to today’s passage in the Message Bible … And what we believe is that the One who raised up the Master Jesus will just as certainly raise us up with you, alive. Every detail works to your advantage and to God’s glory … So we’re not giving up. How could we! Even though on the outside it often looks like things are falling apart on us, on the inside, where God is making new life, not a day goes by without his unfolding grace. These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us. There’s far more here than meets the eye. The things we see now are here today, gone tomorrow. But the things we can’t see now will last forever.What problem are you holding onto just a bit too tightly right now?What issue should you take a little less seriously right now?What do you need to change your perspective on to see it as temporary? Because it is.Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, please help me to stand up when I feel like giving up. Help me to release my grip when I feel like taking control. Help me to hand over to You everything I hold on to. As above, so below.”

From a teenage boy in the fields alone with the sheep to a king in the palace, David’s life knew trouble … trouble he made for himself, trouble from others, and a lot of trouble with his kids.Despite his issues, David constantly showed us how to turn to the Lord with anything and everything.Listen to Psalm 18:1-6 …I love you, Lord; you are my strength. The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety.  I called on the Lord, who is worthy of praise, and he saved me from my enemies. The ropes of death entangled me; floods of destruction swept over me. The grave wrapped its ropes around me; death laid a trap in my path. But in my distress I cried out to the Lord; yes, I prayed to my God for help. He heard me from his sanctuary; my cry to him reached his ears. (NLT) If you were to composed a psalm of your own, what would you say to God? What would you say about God?You know what enemies, threats, floods, and distress feel like, don’t you? Do you know the other side David speaks about? To allow God to rescue you? To cry out to Him for help?Listen to part of this passage again in The New Life Bible … I love You, O Lord, my strength. The Lord is my rock, and my safe place, and the One Who takes me out of trouble. My God is my rock, in Whom I am safe. He is my safe-covering, my saving strength, and my strong tower. I call to the Lord, Who has the right to be praised. And I am saved from those who hate me. The ropes of death were all around me. The floods of death make me afraid. The ropes of the grave were all around me. The traps of death were set for me. I called to the Lord in my trouble. I cried to God for help. He heard my voice from His holy house. My cry for help came into His ears.Let’s take a few moments to list some of the major troubles you have experienced … maybe something you are walking through right now?Now list what God has done or what You want to see Him do?Listing, even writing out your prayers is a great exercise … one you might try doing with your kids too.Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, You are my strength, my Rock, my Safe Place, my Covering, my Strong Tower. Thank You for hearing me when I cry out to You. Thank You for answering, not always on my time, but on Yours. As above, so below.”

When we face tough times, when we don’t know what to do as a parent, when disappointment and heartache comes, we have to remember Jesus came and experienced all these same hurts and emotions and so He understands how we feel. Listen to Hebrews 4:14-16 … So then, since we have a great High Priest who has entered heaven, Jesus the Son of God, let us hold firmly to what we believe. This High Priest of ours understands our weaknesses, for he faced all of the same testings we do, yet he did not sin. So let us come boldly to the throne of our gracious God. There we will receive his mercy, and we will find grace to help us when we need it most. (NLT) How often have you been in a dark moment and thought, “I just wish someone could understand what I’m going through right now. How I feel.”? How amazing is it that God tells us when we are weak and failing the test, that actually is the best time to come boldly before Him … to receive mercy and find grace. … Help when we need it most.Listen to this passage again in The Message Bible … Now that we know what we have—Jesus, this great High Priest with ready access to God—let’s not let it slip through our fingers. We don’t have a priest who is out of touch with our reality. He’s been through weakness and testing, experienced it all—all but the sin. So let’s walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help.What part of this passage stood out to you? Spoke to you?How great is it that we are told to … walk right up to him and get what he is so ready to give. Take the mercy, accept the help?Knowing that God has experienced what you are feeling and is ready, waiting to give you the mercy and strength you need. Can I do that now? Imagine in your mind your Father is with you now, He knows the struggle already, can you boldly walk to him and ask for what He promises He is ready to give? Ask for mercy and then ask for help.What if you wrote that message across your bathroom mirror? To see it first thing every morning and the last thing at night? Take the mercy, accept the help. … amen.Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, when I’m weak, when I’m being tested by my kids, when I have no idea what to do, remind me to “take the mercy and accept the help.” As above, so below.”

Parenting is a long-haul job. A job we don’t get days off from and we cannot quit. We all need constant emotional, mental, and spiritual fuel to keep on keeping on in raising our kids.Listen to Romans 5:2-5 …Because of our faith, Christ has brought us into this place of undeserved privilege where we now stand, and we confidently and joyfully look forward to sharing God’s glory. We can rejoice, too, when we run into problems and trials, for we know that they help us develop endurance. And endurance develops strength of character, and character strengthens our confident hope of salvation. And this hope will not lead to disappointment. For we know how dearly God loves us, because he has given us the Holy Spirit to fill our hearts with his love. (NLT) Confidence. Joy. Help for problems and trials. Endurance. Character. Strength. Hope that does not disappoint. Our hearts filled with love. Who else could possibly offer that kind of guarantee but God?Listen to verses 3-5 in The Message …There’s more to come: We continue to shout our praise even when we’re hemmed in with troubles, because we know how troubles can develop passionate patience in us, and how that patience in turn forges the tempered steel of virtue, keeping us alert for whatever God will do next. In alert expectancy such as this, we’re never left feeling shortchanged. Quite the contrary—we can’t round up enough containers to hold everything God generously pours into our lives through the Holy Spirit!Do you believe your current troubles can develop passionate patience in you? Something we all desperately need as parents in today’s culture, right?The next time you feel hemmed in by trouble, know that you aren’t being short-changed, but God will provide a way out and, then on the other side, you can experience the “tempered steel of virtue.”Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, when trouble comes, especially with my kids, help me to look for You in the midst of the mess. Teach me to anticipate what You are going to do on the other side. As above, so below.”

Galatians 5:22 and 23 offers us a list of qualities and characteristics that God will give us. Then, as parents, can become a blessing to our children.But the Holy Spirit produces this kind of fruit in our lives: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. (NLT) Picture a fruit tree … whatever fruit is your favorite … when that tree begins to show the fruit it grows on its branches, does it then use that for its own food? Of course not. The fruit of the tree is not for the tree, but for those who can take part in its maturity and enjoy its blessing. Does picking the fruit to eat hurt the tree? No. Two reasons why … that’s the purpose of the tree and it can grow more.The same concept is what God’s fruit produces and provides in us—our maturity and growth that blesses others, but most especially our own kids.Listen to The Message Bible’s take on this same passage:But what happens when we live God’s way? He brings gifts into our lives, much the same way that fruit appears in an orchard—things like affection for others, exuberance about life, serenity. We develop a willingness to stick with things, a sense of compassion in the heart, and a conviction that a basic holiness permeates things and people. We find ourselves involved in loyal commitments, not needing to force our way in life, able to marshal and direct our energies wisely.So, are you strong in kindness but struggle in self-control? Good at expressing love but battle being at peace within your heart? Take a few minutes to do a fruit inspection with God. Let Him show you anywhere you need to submit to Him. Keep in mind, none of us can produce this fruit on our own.Let’s pray together: “Heavenly Father, help me to love, to find joy, to allow peace, to be patient, be kind, show goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and please help me to have self-control by giving control of everything to You. As above, so below.”