The Couples Therapist Couch

When looking at sexual betrayal, many people in our society simplify it down to the fact that the betrayer is bad, wrong, and should be cut off. This leaves out the opportunity of a much more complex way of viewing these situations. To think about this with a more open mind is not to say that there is no accountability on the part of the betrayer, but to hold them accountable while at the same time bringing understanding to them as a person. In this conversation with Dr. Alexandra Katehakis we talk all about healthy sex, sex addiction, love addiction, and how to work with couples facing these issues.  Alexandra Katehakis, PhD is the Founder and Clinical Director of the Center for Healthy Sex in Los Angeles and the author of several books which I will list below with links. She is an LMFT and clinical supervisor at the American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists and a clinical supervisor and member of the teaching faculty for the International Institute for Trauma and Addiction Professionals (IITAP), a national certifying body for sex addiction therapists. She is a prominent writer and expert panelist at sexuality conferences and public events. The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group Check out Alex's website at centerforhealthysex.com Books:  Erotic Intelligence: Igniting Hot, Healthy Sex While in Recovery from Sex Addiction Sex Addiction as Affect Dysregulation: A Neurobiologically Informed Holistic Treatment co-author of the award-winning daily meditation book, Mirror of Intimacy: Daily Reflections on Emotional and Erotic Intelligence and contributing author of the award-winning clinical textbook Making Advances: A Comprehensive Guide for Treating Female Sex and Love Addicts and her brand new workbook: Sexual Reflections: A Workbook for Designing and Celebrating Your Sexual Health Plan

There are more and more people who might be defined as sexual minorities and it is as important as ever for therapists to be educated and sensitive all types of people they are working with. In this episode Jonathan Burstein discusses polyamorous relationships and how we might become more culturally competent as therapists.   Couples need to feel like their therapist won't pathologize their lifestyle choices and make "poly" the problem when they are actually coming in for other relationship issues. There are some important considerations for couples who are considering opening up their partnership. Johathan Burstein is a licensed marriage and family therapist in Berkeley California. He specializes in working with LGBTQ and alternative relationship communities.   The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group Check out Jonathan's website at jonathanburstein.com

In grad school we learn all the essentials to become a great therapist. Unfortunately, most therapists come out of that experience lacking any sort of preparation for running a successful business.  It is essential for therapists to know how to run their business in order to serve as many people as possible and not have the financial stressors that impact their ability to do good work.  This is a bonus business episode with Lynn Grodzki, a practice building expert who has helped hundreds of thousands of therapists and helping professionals build the practice they want. Lynn has written 6 books listed below including best seller, Building Your Ideal Private Practice. She has a new book coming out in May called Therapy With a Coaching Edge. The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group. Check out Lynn Grodzki's website at privatepracticesuccess.com Click here to see all of Lynn's books See Lynn's site for her new book called Therapy With a Coaching Edge

Traditional therapy has done a great job of providing clients with a warm, loving, compassionate environment to heal. Unfortunately, it falls short when it comes to bringing up difficult truths to people when that is necessary. In this episode, Terry Real talks about the three phases of his model, Relational Life Therapy (RLT), the first of which is joining through the truth. In this way he begins the process of creating quick, profound change in the individuals and couples he works with.  During the conversation we get into stance-stance-dance, empowering the latent, using a lot of pause, grandiosity, inner child work, and many of the other aspects of Terry's model for couples therapists (RLT). Terry Real is a leader in the field of couples therapy. He has written 3 books which are linked below, numerous articles, and has been featured in countless interviews with media outlets. He is the founder of the Relational Life Institute and continues to work with couples as well as train therapists. For more information on his upcoming level one training click the link below. The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group. Check out Terry Real's website at terryreal.com Click here to learn more about RLT level 1 training Books The New Rules of Marriage: What You Need to Know to Make Love Work How Can I Get Through to You? Closing the Intimacy Gap Between Men and Women I Don't Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression

How do unfaithful partners typically respond differently than hurt partners after an affair? What constitutes an affair - intercourse? Instant messaging? Flirting? How can unfaithful partners take responsibility for the damage they caused and earn forgiveness?  These are just a few of the many questions that leave couples feeling confused about what to do after there has been an affair. Janis Abrahms Spring, PhD has beautifully answered these questions in her book, After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful. She normalizes and reassures couples about what they are going through in a way that gives them hope. That book has been incredibly successful and has sold over 500,000 copies. In addition to that she has written two other books which are linked below. She has been in practice for over 40 years in Westport, Connecticut.  The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group. Check out Dr. Spring's website at janisaspring.com Books After the Affair: Healing the Pain and Rebuilding Trust When a Partner Has Been Unfaithful How Can I Forgive You? The Courage to Forgive, the Freedom Not To Life with Pop: Lessons on Caring for an Aging Parent

Some of the most challenging couples we see in Couples Therapy are those who are no longer even in a relationship. When children are involved, it is not possible to ever completely be free of one's ex partner.  In these situations it is incredibly important for these co-parents to work together in order to support the children in the best way possible. Karen Bonnell is an expert at helping these co-parents work through these situations in a way that is healthy for everyone. Karen is a collaborative divorce coach who has been helping families for the last 30 years. She teaches parents the best ways to support their children, strengthen their co-parenting, and discover the necessary tools to skillfully create a two-home family. The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group. Check out Karen's website at coachmediateconsult.com Books Get a copy of The Co-Parenting Handbook: Raising Well-Adjusted and Resilient Kids from Little Ones to Young Adults through Divorce or Separation Get a copy of The Parenting Plan Workbook: A Comprehensive Guide to Building a Strong, Child-Centered Parenting Plan

Stan Tatkin says that being a Couples Therapist is like being a good Jazz Musician. With a jazz performance, the musicians follow the flow and play in the moment. They're not following a rehearsed piece. No concert is the same. With jazz, it's the many years of practice and expertise, that give each performance its unique identity. As Couples Therapists we bring our own experience and training to each couple we work with. The best Therapists have the ability to be present and trust their instincts to guide couples to what they need. Stan Tatkin is the creator of A Psychobiological Approach to Couple Therapy. He is the author of several books for couples which are listed below with links.  The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group. Check out Stan's website at thepactinstitute.com Stan's TED Talk called Relationships Are Hard, But Why? Stan's books: Wired for Dating Wired for Love Your Brain on Love (6 CD set) Love and War in Intimate Relationships    

This is the 6th edition of the bonus business episodes that are released the first (or second) Thursday of each month. This is a solo episode with Shane Birkel that is all about steps you can take if your practice isn't quite where you want it to be yet. The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group.

People often have a hard time feeling heard and understood, especially in their relationships. In this episode of The Couples Therapist Couch, Anabelle Bugatti talks about attachment and how that influences how we are in relationships. Anabelle works with couples using Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) and discusses important considerations for using EFT with couples and how this framework is one of the best ways to get results in couples therapy. Anabelle Bugatti is an LMFT and certified EFT Couples Therapist. She has a practice near Las Vegas, Nevada. She is currently pursuing a PhD in Marriage and Family Therapy.  The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! If you enjoyed the episode please leave a rating and review on iTunes. Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group. Check out Anabelle's practice website at lasvegasmarriagecounseling.com Check out her videos for therapists and couples at wehearttherapy.com  

In our society, we do a terrible job of preparing new parents for what is to come in their relationship with each other. 92% of parents report increased disagreements after the baby is born. Adding to the huge amount of stress experienced in the transition to parenthood is the perception that we are not good enough or that we are doing something wrong.  Elly Taylor has made it her mission to help couples better prepare for the journey of becoming their new version of "us". She has broken it down into 8 steps for families to understand in order to be able to thrive. Elly Taylor is an Australian relationship counsellor, independent parenthood researcher and author of the award winning book Becoming Us. Elly is the founder of Becoming Us, an organisation created to teach helping professionals her research and evidence-based approach to the transition into parenthood and to support mothers, fathers, partners and families to thrive. The Couples Therapist Couch is the podcast for Couples Therapists about the practice of couples therapy. The host, Shane Birkel, interviews an expert in the field of couples therapy each week. There is an episode released every Tuesday about the practice of couples therapy. Please subscribe to the podcast for more great episodes! Click here to join the Couples Therapist Couch Facebook Group. Check out Elly's website at ellytaylor.com Buy Elly's book: Becoming Us: 8 Steps to Grow a Family that Thrives