The Art of Charm

Dorie Clark (@dorieclark) is a marketing strategist, adjunct professor of business administration at Duke University's Fuqua School of Business, and author -- most recently of Entrepreneurial You: Monetize Your Expertise, Create Multiple Income Streams, and Thrive. The Cheat Sheet: How Dorie Clark basically won a Grammy for networking. Why it's better to optimize for the interesting instead of prioritizing an income level. How to build a career out of what might seem like disparate pieces of expertise and experience rather than focusing on just one thing. Why we don't make money from something -- we make money because of it. Why pursuing entrepreneurial ambitions isn't just for the fulfillment of some dreamy fantasy, but a means of survival in the modern workforce. And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/657/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! With Thrive Market, you get your favorite premium, organic, non-GMO products delivered to your door at wholesale prices -- as an AoC listener, you'll get $20 off your first three orders by signing up at thrivemarket.com/charm! Casper makes hybrid mattresses that combine premium latex foam with memory foam -- and won't charge you an arm and a leg for them. Get $50 toward any mattress purchase here by using promo code AOC! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Today, over a million people use the amazing Ring video doorbell to help protect their homes. Save up to $150 off a Ring of Security kit when you go to ring.com/charm! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. This time around, we examine how even the negative emotions we experience originate as positive intentions on behalf of our subconscious brain -- and how we might use this knowledge to understand and better process them. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: Our subconscious communicates with our conscious mind using emotions. Every emotion, no matter how unpleasant, has a positive intent. Sometimes the connection between what we feel and why we feel it isn't obvious. This week, any time you experience a negative emotion, stop for a second and try to connect the dots -- imagine what the positive intention your subconscious brain is trying to communicate might be. Once we determine the positive intent, we can take the proper action to truly process this emotion. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he actually reads everything)! Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-73-the-positive-intent-of-emotion/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Listen to The Art of Charm, Forbes Overworld, and hundreds of your favorite podcasts with the free PodcastOne app (on iOS and Android) here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. This week, Kimberly Seltzer joins Jordan and Jason to set your questions right and help you course correct. Let's cut to it! In this episode: How do we cut off relationships with addicts when they're so good at making us feel sorry for them? Your good friend's significant other is a disrespectful, bossy mismatch, and it's obvious to everyone in your social group but him. Is there a way to hang out with him without her? When both partners in a long-term relationship have partaken of infidelities, can trust ever truly be regained between them? On paper, you seem to have your act together -- you maintain fitness, you have a good job, and you're friendly and outgoing. So why aren't you getting second dates or approached in real life by potential suitors? How do you help your best friend of 13 years maintain a healthy mental life and not get sore over his rebuffing of your suggestions -- especially when he's got another friend who encourages his bad behavior through binge drinking? How do you get over a five-year dry spell when your longest relationships won't last longer than a month? Documentary of the Week: Hot Girls Wanted Quick shoutouts to Mark and Janine and the UPS delivery dame! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Check out Jordan's (@TheArtofCharm) other show: The Forbes List, and Jason's (@jpdef) other show: Grumpy Old Geeks. Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/fmf134/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Art of Charm (@TheArtofCharm) trio of Johnny, AJ, and Jordan talk about the four components of a first impression that begin even before the first words are exchanged: static, dynamic, self-presentation, and circumstance. "You can't become a positive blip on someone's radar if they can't see you." -AJ Harbinger The Cheat Sheet: There are four components that go into making a first impression before first words are even exchanged. Static: This is your physique and the exercise, nutrition, and sleep that go into maintaining it. Dynamic: Your body language and not only what it communicates to others, but how it affects the way you feel about yourself. Self-Presentation: What you wear, how you wear it, and the grooming that demonstrates at least a basic understanding of style and hygiene. Circumstance: Where you spend your time and with whom you choose to spend it. And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/656/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! With Business Platinum from American Express, it's not about where you are, it's about where you want to take your business next. Explore the Power of The Business Platinum Card here! Rhone makes gear for the modern man who demands modern style, comfort, and quality. Click here or go to rhone.com and enter promo code CHARM at checkout to get 20% off your first purchase! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Roger Stone (@RogerJStoneJr) is a political consultant, lobbyist, and strategist, subject of Netflix's Get Me Roger Stone documentary, and author of The Making of the President 2016: How Donald Trump Orchestrated a Revolution. "One man's dirty trick is another man's civic participation." -Roger Stone The Cheat Sheet: Is Roger Stone a bona fide agent provocateur? How Roger Stone pulled a Frank Underwood by usurping power from the president of his class as a junior in high school. How is politics more about addition than subtraction? What are Stone's Rules, and how do they influence our current political landscape? Is Roger Stone an equal opportunity character assassin? On what issues might he diverge from others of a conservative leaning? And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/655/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! With pain-free invoicing, FreshBooks helps entrepreneurs and freelancers save time and avoid a lot of the stress that comes with running a small business. Try a month of unrestricted use for free here (no credit card required)! Enter ART OF CHARM in the How You Heard About Us section. Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Skip Netflix tonight and join the millions of students learning and growing on Skillshare today -- AoC listeners get one month of Skillshare free by signing up at skillshare.com/charm! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Minisode Monday, where we kick off the week with something quick and actionable -- to make you more magnetic and effective -- that you can implement right away. When you agree to meet with someone for the first time -- whether it's over coffee to discuss a startup idea or over martinis for recruitment to your counterintelligence team -- you should be prepared. The Code of Trust: An American Counterintelligence Expert's Five Rules to Lead and Succeed author Robin Dreeke rejoins us to share some of his strategies for first meetings. If you like what you hear here, make sure to check out our full show with Robin here. Let's get to it! The Cheat Sheet: Know their generation. The time in which we grow up informs how we see the world. Baby boomers have a very different point of reference from millennials. Keep a truth. Robin wears a Darth Vader watch -- a prop that has authentic meaning to him and tends to spark conversation. It "builds affiliation through a commonality," he says. Let them choose the time for your meeting. You may have to reject it if there's a conflict, but it shows you don't take their time for granted and it empowers them with choice. Get there on time. The reasons you don't want to arrive late shouldn't have to be explained, but arriving too early is a signal that you're there for your reasons -- not theirs. Make sure to check out our full show with Robin Dreeke for more pointers on making smart connections: The Code of Trust (Episode 653) To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he actually reads everything)! Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-72-first-meetings-spies-anti-spies-ordinary-people/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Listen to The Art of Charm, Forbes Overworld, and hundreds of your favorite podcasts with the free PodcastOne app (on iOS and Android) here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Time for Fan Mail Friday, where we'll be answering your questions and dropping some knowledge and feedback to help you kick the weekend off right. Let's cut to it! In this episode: How's a college kid expected to get a date without owning a sweet ride? Okay, okay. So dogs don't exactly see the world in black and white. Are the two toughest things in sobriety romance and finance? Fun fact we just made up: the average Colombian is into cocaine like the average American is into ballet. We helped a listener -- who paid attention to our networking and body language episodes -- ace his job interview! Afraid the check you want to cash from your deadbeat relative is going to bounce? Here's one strategy to make sure you get what you're owed without hassle. Do we have any tips for retaining and getting the most out of all the knowledge we drop on you almost every day? Documentary of the Week: Sour Grapes A quick shoutout to X and Y! Have any questions, comments, or stories you'd like to share with us? Drop us a line at friday@theartofcharm.com! Check out Jordan's (@TheArtofCharm) other show: The Forbes List, and Jason's (@jpdef) other show: Grumpy Old Geeks. Full show notes at http://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes// Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! The Art of Manliness is a podcast that explores all things manly -- from the serious and philosophical to the practical and fun. Check it out here! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Admiral William H. McRaven (@billmcraven) masterminded and executed the mission that brought down Osama bin Laden and is the author of Make Your Bed: Little Things That Can Change Your Life...And Maybe the World. "Opportunities, to me, are always the jobs that nobody else wants." -Admiral William H. McRaven The Cheat Sheet: What are the benefits to taking every day, as a Navy SEAL might say, "one evolution at a time?" What are the potential downfalls of having a 20-year plan? Why is taking advantage of opportunities more important than charting a course -- and how can we spot them? What are you proving when you're willing to take professional risks -- even when you don't succeed? What is the most important thing to understand about leadership? And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/654/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Learn over 500 subjects (no tests or homework!) at The Great Courses Plus -- The Art of Charm listeners get one month free here! SmartMouth is the only activated oral rinse clinically proven to eliminate existing bad breath and prevent it from returning for a full twelve hours per rinse. Visit SmartMouth.com to get an in-depth, scientific analysis of how SmartMouth is able to deliver such incredible results! With Business Platinum from American Express, it's not about where you are, it's about where you want to take your business next. Explore the Power of The Business Platinum Card here! Rhone makes gear for the modern man who demands modern style, comfort, and quality. Click here or go to rhone.com and enter promo code CHARM at checkout to get 20% off your first purchase! You know James Altucher -- he's been on The Art of Charm, and Jordan's been on his show. We share a lot of similar guests, but we ask different questions. Check out The James Altucher Show here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Robin Dreeke (@rdreeke) is a 28-year veteran of federal service, former head of the Counterintelligence Behavioral Analysis Program, and co-author of The Code of Trust: An American Counterintelligence Expert's Five Rules to Lead and Succeed. "You can be the most brilliant person on the face of the earth with the most amazing skills, but if you can't develop relationships and have trust, you're completely worthless." -Robin Dreeke The Cheat Sheet: Learn the Code of Trust's five principles and how they help us build rapport. Understand the difference between manipulation and trust. Discover why trustworthy people always rise to the top. Find out how to get others to open up and connect with us -- spy style. Recognize why real leaders put the needs of others before their own -- and don't keep a score card. And so much more... Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/653/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! With pain-free invoicing, FreshBooks helps entrepreneurs and freelancers save time and avoid a lot of the stress that comes with running a small business. Try a month of unrestricted use for free here (no credit card required)! Enter ART OF CHARM in the How You Heard About Us section. Are you trying to hire the right person for your business, but the best candidates keep slipping away? Let ZipRecruiter -- the fastest way to hire great people -- help you screen only the best here! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! DesignCrowd helps startups and small businesses crowdsource custom graphics, logos, Web design -- even tattoo designs! Check out DesignCrowd.com/Charm for a special $100 VIP offer for our listeners or enter the discount code CHARM when posting a project. Free yourself from typing notes, reports, and documents by going with the transcriptionists we trust here at AoC: TranscriptionOutsourcing.net -- 99% or higher accuracy guaranteed! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This Minisode Monday, we try an exercise designed to make you consider the importance of perspective and useful illusions: how does your pet see the world? The Cheat Sheet: As we've learned from conversations with David Eagleman, Isaac Lidsky, and Jason Silva, reality differs by how it is perceived. If that sounds like woo-woo nonsense, try to consider how the world with which you interact every day is experienced by others. If you were to gain the magical ability to ask a dog, a cat, and a dust mite to describe the world around them, what kind of answers would you expect? The dog sees in black and white. The cat would strongly advocate for the safety of tiny boxes and high places. The dust mite's entire world might be the inside of your mattress -- something with which you interact every day, but have probably never seen (unless you really need a new mattress). The version of the world you would describe back to them would be just as varied, biased, flawed, and seemingly inaccurate. Though biased and flawed, places where our realities -- constructed by our senses and perceptions -- overlap create a useful illusion that keeps us from constantly running into each other. Still, we need to remember that our reality is not a hundred percent of someone else's reality. Instead of rejecting someone else's reality because it doesn't match your experience, try adopting their perspective to understand their differences. Start bending your own reality instead of trying to bend the reality of others to fit your fiction. To learn more about social dynamics and productivity hacks, take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. Also be sure to check out our Social Capital Intensive here! Let us know about how you put today's Minisode Monday into practice! Tweet with @TheArtofCharm in your response or write to Jordan directly: jordan@theartofcharm.com (he actually reads everything)! Full show notes at https://theartofcharm.com/podcast-episodes/minisode-monday-71-how-does-your-pet-see-the-world/ Find out more about the team who makes The Art of Charm podcast here! Take the Art of Charm Challenge by clicking here, or text AOC to 38470. We'll take you step by step to becoming better at making personal and professional connections, becoming a better networker, increasing your personal social capital and charisma. This is for both men and women! Does your business have an Internet presence? Now save a whopping 50% on new webhosting packages here with HostGator by using coupon code CHARM! Listen to The Art of Charm, Forbes Network, and hundreds of your favorite podcasts with the free PodcastOne app (on iOS and Android) here! HELP US SPREAD THE WORD! If you dig the show, please subscribe in iTunes and write us a review! This is what helps us stand out from the crowd and help people find the credible advice they need. Review the show in iTunes! We rely on it! http://www.theartofcharm.com/mobilereview Stay Charming! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices