The Mating Grounds Podcast

Tucker Max and Dr. Geoffrey Miller
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May 25, 2015 • 1h 18min

Helping Joe, Episode 17

In this week of Helping Joe, Joe continues to have the same ED issues and performance anxiety that he talked about in Episode 16. Nils Parker and Charlie Hoehn help him figure out what he can do to get hard again, how to talk to the girl he is having sex with about these problems, and why to work on enjoying sex together instead of just struggling by himself. They also talk about another awful shirt Joe wore (pics on the blog below), an update with a girl from his improv class, why sleep is so important, and how to get better sleep. 
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May 21, 2015 • 10min

Bad Advice From The Internet: “Just Believe In Yourself And Go Talk To Her.”

In this episode of Bad Advice, Tucker Max explains how "just believe in yourself" is toxic advice that encourages delusional self-confidence, which doesn’t work for 90% of guys. It makes them feel worse because they can’t just believe in themselves. The empirical evidence shows that is not how confidence works.  Confidence comes from preparation, practice, and action (doing things). Start small with simple tasks, low stakes. We talked about this in our social anxiety episode. This is also how athletes build foundational skills and get better at their sport.    
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May 20, 2015 • 24min

Why Do I Like This Type Of Porn?

First, it's important to mention that nearly all guys watch porn. In this Q&A, Tucker, Dr. Miller, and Nils explain why men are into so many different types of porn (US map of top genres by state) and the many reasons why watching porn is good, from emotional self-improvement to decreasing crime. This caller may be using porn as a way to heal the trauma of a bad breakup. Tucker also tells a story about Dr. Miller's funny Amazon recommendations. 
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May 19, 2015 • 17min

Why Do Women Suddenly Break Up With Me?

Explore the intriguing reasons behind sudden breakups in dating. The hosts emphasize the importance of self-reflection and recognizing personal patterns that may contribute to relationship woes. Discover how little details, like grooming and living conditions, can significantly sway women's perceptions. Listen for humorous anecdotes that reveal common pitfalls men might overlook. They also stress the value of receiving honest feedback from women to identify areas for growth and enhance dating success.
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May 18, 2015 • 55min

Helping Joe, Episode 16

In this episode of Helping Joe, Joe goes on two great dates with the girl he met from Tinder (see Episode 14), and he follows Tucker’s advice by going back to her place because his has no furniture. However, things quickly go downhill when Joe has problems in the bedroom. Tucker and Nils talk him through what happened, why he has shame around sex, and what to do going forward to fix these issues. They also share sad but funny stories of their own experiences with these problems. 
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May 14, 2015 • 13min

Is This Girl Just Using Me?

The podcast discusses a listener's dilemma of feeling used by a girl he's known for years who only wants physical affection on her own terms. They explore the dynamics of casual relationships and the importance of communication and self-awareness in navigating different expectations.
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May 13, 2015 • 20min

How Do I Bring My Girlfriend Home If My Family Doesn't Accept Me?

In this Q&A episode, Tucker Max, Nils Parker, and Dr. Geoffrey Miller explain how your family can impact a woman’s judgement of you and your mate value, but it’s not a major factor that women evaluate you on. If your family doesn’t accept you, it’s usually due to a family mistake or general toxicity and not your fault. Tucker came from an awful family but was still able to marry a fantastic woman. They talk about when and how to tell your girlfriend about these issues so she doesn't assume the worst. And remember, she's on your side.
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May 12, 2015 • 23min

How Do I Go From Conversation To Sex?

In this Q&A episode, Tucker Max, Dr. Geoffrey Miller, and Dr. Carin Perilloux explain how genuinely connecting and NOT thinking about women as objects or thinking about sex as a separate thing or on a different level will actually lead to more sex with women. There are no right words or moves that work every time, but there are signs to look for if a woman is into you and wants to move foreward. For a good example of this, see Helping Joe, Episode 14 @ minute 55:00. 
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May 11, 2015 • 1h 21min

Helping Joe, Episode 15

In this week of Helping Joe, Charlie and Tucker talk to Joe about his second go at speed dating. This time Charlie went with him and some strange and hilarious things happened leading up to and during the event. Joe showed major improvements in confidence by owning his oddness, but his fashion choices are still atrocious. They dig into why this idea of trying to impress women by what you wear is ineffective for most guys and what you should focus on instead to make a good first impression and attract great women. 
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May 7, 2015 • 9min

Bad Advice From The Internet: "Sleep With A Lot Of Women To Get Good In Bed."

In this episode of Bad Advice From The Internet, Tucker Max explains how sleeping with a lot of women to get good sexually is the opposite of the truth. Having sex with different women is great, but if you want to get better in bed it's much easier to do that by connecting with one woman and having sex with her over and over. The way you get good at any skill is by practicing and getting good at the skill of sex is about being comfortable and getting reps. That practice with one will help with all because women are more alike than different.

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