Simply Convivial: Biblical Homemaking, Homeschooling & Mom Life—Without Burnout

Instead of focusing on the hurting or the tiredness, focus on the growing.It is good to want to grow up, and along the way the growing will cause pains, aches, and tiredness. If we look at the growth, we will be encouraged and be able to bear the aches. If we focus exclusively on how we feel, we will be discouraged, sad, and upset.When your heart and mind fight to be cranky, and you struggle to win the fight and stay cheerful, and you win it, you have a real success to be cheerful about, even if you feel worn out by it. Remember, prayer is the most effective weapon in the fight against a bad attitude.

Do you think your story is all about you? That might be your biggest problem in living out a good story. Get hope and help telling a truer, better story: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/story for a free module from my course Organize Your Attitude all about Living in Story.

Your life is truly a fairy tale.

We're all constantly narrating a story about what's going on around us. Inside our head, the ticker tape comments never stop. Is the story you're seeing and telling yourself accurate? Have you ever stopped to think about the perspective your own narrator has? Reality doesn't change based on what you think or say, but what you think or say can give you a skewed vision of reality. We should make sure the interpretations we tell ourself, the stories we spin inside our own head, line up with reality before we believe them or persist in them.Telling yourself a true story is the basic step in organizing your attitude.Need more help with this? You'll find it at www.simplyconvivial.com

So, we know that our home is for hospitality, but it seems so hard – it’s extra, and we have no room for extra. We want to know how to be hospitable, but it doesn’t come naturally.The one thing that makes hospitality so difficult is that we are out of practice.It is easy to slip into selfish patterns: doing what needs to be done on our own agendas, taking a break, keeping to ourselves and our own thoughts. Instead, we need to practice the habit of hospitality.The being hospitable includes but is much broader than having people over for dinner. It means inviting people into our lives – even the people that live in our houses.It is not enough to simply share a roof with people. We need to share a life – a full life, a conversational life – with them.And that sort of life will overflow into the lives of others through invitations and conversations, but mostly through our demeanor. The way we treat people is either selfish or welcoming, inviting, and interested. When we practice that mindset and manner with our family, it will become how we treat others as well. The habit of hospitality will shape all our interactions.The ways we are hospitable to others are the same ways we are hospitable to our family. And if we are not first hospitable to our family, we cannot be truly hospitable to anyone else.

But when we get our picture of what hospitality should look like from the magazine rack or HGTV, we stress out and shut down.The kind of hospitality God wants us to offer, however, is not according to worldly standards. The world’s goal for hospitality is to impress. God’s goal for hospitality is to knit. Through opening our doors and our lives to one another, we grow as a community. When we gather as a church body and share a meal and our lives, our love and fellowship deepens. When we gather in those outside, we show them what it’s like inside – inside the bounds of God’s family, God’s body, God’s community.Hospitality is not about showing off or impressing others. So we do not have to postpone it until the kitchen reno is complete, until the yard is gorgeous, or until we feel ready. We simply invite others into life, as is.That said, there are 3 ways I simplify the process and make it less stressful, less burdensome, to regularly have people over.

https://www.simplyconvivial.com/Pursue hospitality. It’s a command. It’s a duty. But it doesn’t mean that we all need to be having people over for dinner every week.Well, except for our people – we feed them every day, every week – three times a day, even. That’s hospitality, too.The goal of hospitality means that we see our homes as tools in the formation of people, not as trophies to be kept beautiful.As G.K. Chesterton reminds us: The business done in the home is nothing less than the shaping of the body and soul of humanity.As homemakers, we’re making hospitable homes, homes that shape the bodies and souls of humanity.Those souls’ bodies might have been shaped in our wombs or not. Those bodies might sleep between sheets we wash or not. But our goal is that all the bodies and souls under our roof for years or for hours be shaped for good by the time spent in our homes.That’s our business.Our home is for the service of building up people.

Need to overcome chaos? Check out this article with a free housecleaning guide: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/clean/No matter how much we clean and organize, it never stays that way. What gives? What are we doing wrong? The only thing we’re doing wrong is thinking it would be otherwise.Entropy is real. Disorder happens. That’s exactly why we have a job, a responsibility, as homemakers, to keep things running. It’s a truth universally acknowledged that a home with many small children will be messy. And, if you ever find a magazine, tv show, or blog that does not acknowledge that reality, run. Run away. They don’t actually have help for you, only marketing facades and wishful thinking. If we’re going to be effective homemakers, we need to be walking in light of truth and reality. Did you assume you’d be a more organized mother and homemaker than you are? Did you think it’d be easier than it turned out to be? I’m right there with you. I hear from women all the time who say that before kids they *were* so organized and they don’t know why they can’t figure it out now with life with kids.I’ll tell ya:  The problem isn’t with the kids or your house. It’s with your mindset and your expectations. Family life is different from project-based work and homemaking is different from a job with a boss and a schedule. Children need attention and response in the moment. Children’s needs cannot be predicted and planned, only addressed as needed. That takes a different skill set. Homemaking requires us to be self-directed, self-managed, and self-motivated - a different skill set than being a good employee. At Simply Convivial continuing education we learn and practice the skill sets this family life at home requires, all while remembering that the people are the point and our work is a calling and service given to us by God. When we practice in this mindset we not only improve our skill, we also find contentment and satisfaction, even when things don’t go our way. Remember to pop on over to https://www.simplyconvivial.com/attitude to get your free attitude adjustment audit and reclaim and renew your mindset.And always remember to Repent. Rejoice. Repeat.

Don't miss the ABCs of decluttering workshop: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/2021/the-abcs-of-doable-decluttering-with-free-workshop-replay/What is clutter? If you’re going to declutter, you have to be able to answer that question. It’s harder than it seems, and knowing the difference between clutter and not-clutter might just be the difference between success and failure in your decluttering project. Clutter is stuff that doesn’t belong where it happens to be.Clutter is not only things you don’t want or need.So to declutter means to remove the things that don’t belong.

Declutter Workshop with slide deck download: https://www.simplyconvivial.com/2021/the-abcs-of-doable-decluttering-with-free-workshop-replay/ (no email signup required)How long is it going to take you to declutter?Decluttering can be an overwhelming project. It might feel like there’s no end and no hope in sight. You might be right about that.Declutter in 10 minutes a day and change your perspective on the task of decluttering.Did you assume you’d be a more organized mother and homemaker than you are? Did you think it’d be easier than it turned out to be? I’m right there with you. I hear from women all the time who say that before kids they *were* so organized and they don’t know why they can’t figure it out now with life with kids.I’ll tell ya:  The problem isn’t with the kids or your house. It’s with your mindset and your expectations. Family life is different from project-based work and homemaking is different from a job with a boss and a schedule. Children need attention and response in the moment. Children’s needs cannot be predicted and planned, only addressed as needed. That takes a different skill set. Homemaking requires us to be self-directed, self-managed, and self-motivated - a different skill set than being a good employee. At Simply Convivial continuing education we learn and practice the skill sets this family life at home requires, all while remembering that the people are the point and our work is a calling and service given to us by God. When we practice in this mindset we not only improve our skill, we also find contentment and satisfaction, even when things don’t go our way. Remember to pop on over to https://simplyconvivial.com/attitude to get your free attitude adjustment audit and reclaim and renew your mindset.And always remember to Repent. Rejoice. Repeat.