Adoptees On

Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC, is back this week! We are still talking about estrangement and today looking at the question - is loyalty a trauma response? Marta teaches us about "fawning" and that many of us will choose to be loyal to others before ourselves. Full Show Notes Here Recommended Resources Marta's first appearance on the podcast was episode 69 which teaches about the Internal Family Systems model and why it's helpful for adopted people. (Other episodes featuring Marta: 71, 134, 135, & 180) Connect With Us Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC: martasierralmhc [at] gmail [dot] com | martadrachenberglmhc.com Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC, one of our favourite adoptee therapists is back on the podcast today! We are talking about estrangement through the lens of the Internal Family Systems therapy model. Marta teaches us how to listen to our parts' needs and prioritize the safety of our own identity above preserving relationships. Full Show Notes Here Connect With Us Marta Isabella Sierra, LMHC: martasierralmhc [at] gmail [dot] com | martadrachenberglmhc.com Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

I'm thrilled Shannon Gibney, writer and activist is here! Shannon shares some of her personal story and how she's observed adoptee voices reaching critical mass over the last fifteen years. Since her first novel, See No Color, was released 6 years ago, she's heard from many younger adoptees who've felt seen and validated by reading her words. Shannon recounts how her experience of grief in motherhood and the adoptee experience intertwined, and how she's modelled truth-telling, even the difficult things, to her children. Full Show Notes Here Connect With Us Shannon Gibney: www.shannongibney.com | Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

Ferera Swan is here to share her experiences of reunion and secondary rejection with us. We talk about the impact other members of the extended family can have on our reunions, and Ferera tells us about the meaning behind her name and what her producer encouraged to include in her song "Second Time". Full Show Notes Here Connect With Us Ferera Swan: www.fereraswan.com | Instagram | SoundCloud | YouTube | Spotify | Indigo+Swan Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker is with us today and she is teaching us about internalized oppression. She tells us why she finds the term "coming out of the fog" somewhat problematic. If you've ever found yourself self-sabotaging, Dr. Wirta-Leiker explains this could actually be a form of self-protection. She leads us with the adoptee-first lens, keeping our mental health and well-being the top priority even when we may prioritize teaching others instead. Full Show Notes Here Find Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker's directory of adoptee therapists here Check out the Society of Adoptee Professionals of Color in Adoption - SAPCA Connect With Us Dr. Chaitra Wirta-Leiker: www.growbeyondwords.com | Facebook Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

I get to interview some incredibly special people on the show, and today is a perfect example. I am thrilled to introduce you to Miguel Caballero. Miguel shares some of his story with us including how he got sober eight years ago. There are so many adopted people who struggle with addiction, and Miguel describes feeling that he had a birth-mother-shaped hole to fill. He's gone on to fill a great need in our community by starting the peer-led support group Adoptees and Addiction. Full Show Notes Here Connect With Us Miguel Caballero: www.adopteesandaddiction.com | Instagram | Facebook Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

I am honoured to be able to bring you part two of Justin's story today. Justin shares about a desire to add back his original surname and here in part two we'll see the fallout. We speculate on what about our experiences as adopted people lets us accept poor treatment that we would never allow towards those we love. Ultimately a world-shifting event in Justin's immediate family brings clarity to his relationship with his adoptive family. *TW: Suicide Full Show Notes Here Show Notes Recommended Resources Learn about Internal Family Systems Marta Dranchenberg shares about IFS on the Healing Series episode 69 and IFS and relationships on episode 71 Self-Therapy: A Step-By-Step Guide to Creating Wholeness and Healing Your Inner Child Using IFS, A New, Cutting-Edge Psychotherapy by Jay Earley, PhD Connect With Us Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

I am honoured to be able to bring you Justin's story today (this is part one, and we'll be back next week with part two). Justin was labelled "difficult to adopt" because he is bi-racial. He tells us that he never had an interest in finding his biological family until he attended a very interesting week-long therapeutic workshop. Justin shares about a desire to add back his original surname and in part two we'll see more of the fallout from that decision. *TW: Suicide Full Show Notes Here Show Notes Please sign the support letter here adopteesforjustice.com/supportletter/ Listen to Anissa's story on Adoptees On - episode 147 - to understand how critical this issue of adoptee citizenship is Connect With Us Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

Part two! We are back with more VERY real talk with Pam Cordano, MFT about estrangement from our adoptive parents. Pam teaches us how important it is for us to get clarity on what is actually possible in our relationships. We also address if they won't change, it's up to us - so what are we willing to change? Our amount of engagement in the relationship? The strength of our boundaries? Which 'circle' do they safely get to have access to? This is tough stuff! Thank you for listening and walking through this with us. Full Show Notes Here Show Notes Connect With Us Pam Cordano, MFT: pamcordano.com | yourmeaningful.life | Twitter | Instagram | Email pcordano(at)comcast(dot)net Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note

Pam Cordano, MFT returns to guide us through some thoughts on estrangement. Why does it ever get to the point that we'd consider going no-contact with our adoptive parents? Are adoptees just "too sensitive" and take everything personally? Even through challenging topics such as this one, Pam leads us with thoughtfulness, compassion, and helps us discover what's most important. Full Show Notes Here Connect With Us Pam Cordano, MFT: pamcordano.com | yourmeaningful.life | Twitter | Instagram | Email pcordano(at)comcast(dot)net Haley Radke: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Adoptees On: Twitter | Instagram | Facebook Subscribe Apple Podcasts | Google Podcasts | iHeart Radio | Spotify | Stitcher | YouTube Support Adoptees On One Time Donation | Monthly | Secret Facebook Group Connect Occasional Newsletter | Send a Note