Deep Listening - Impact beyond words - Oscar Trimboli

In this episode of Deep Listening we go through the forests of Idaho and the borderland between Canada and the United States as we speak to world class mediator Ken Cloke. He mediates across multiple domains from families, to schools, to corporations. Ken has been a mediator for 37 years, and he is a prolific author with 20 published books. Ken takes us on a journey that describes the power and the transformational impact of listening for meaning. He finds a way to listen to himself first before listening to the meaning of the conflict. Ken shares how he mediates to prepare for conflict resolution, and how he is present for the meeting. He also shares how to avoid destructive circles and conflict resolution techniques as they apply to the five levels of listening. Today’s Topics: Listening inside yourself to understand the meaning of the conflict. The two levels of mediation the issues and the relationships. Approaching a conflict with the right attitude. Mediation is a great way to prepare. Fully showing up with the realization that the conversation is important. Diverting negativity from overwhelming the ego and changing statements to requests. Ken shares an example of a couple’s experience and how he goes inside himself to find questions to get to answers. How if there is not an equals sign between the heat of the argument and the topic of the argument there is an underlying meaning. A touching story of how Ken discovered the root cause of an issue with a teacher conflict and found a way for the teacher to feel appreciated and keep her job. Group communication and bringing the human dimension into the conversation and having a transformational impact. Links and Resources: Ken Cloke Books by Ken Cloke Quotes: “To discover what the conflict means I have to find it inside myself and listen correctly.” Ken Cloke “The mediation becomes the relationship on a deeper level.” Ken Cloke “Talking about what things mean to you can have a deeply transformational impact.” Ken Cloke   Want to create a big impact? Subscribe to the Deep Listening podcast and never miss an episode. Listen For Free

My guest today is Jodee Mundy an independent Creative Producer and Artistic Director. Jodee’s work points to a future beyond inclusion where the diversity is as valuable as the art. She also grew up as the only hearing person in a deaf family. Jodee knew her family was deaf, but she didn’t realize that they couldn’t hear until an incident when she got lost in a local store. Jodee brings a unique perspective about what the deaf community can teach the non-deaf community about listening. We also explore why the deaf community are actually better listeners. Today’s Topics: Jodee was born into a deaf family. She is the only one who can hear. Jodee didn’t realize her family was deaf until she got lost in Kmart as a child. She grew up in the culture of signing and lights flashing. Becoming an interpreter and blending into the environment. Adding, subtracting, and substituting information in Auslan. Interpreting for the Dalai Lama. Listening with your whole mind and body. How the deaf community is completely welcoming to everyone who can sign. How deaf people are great at charades, and they are not defined by language. The power of silence and speaking with our eyes. The extraordinary capacity of humans to communicate. Links and Resources: Jodee Mundy Website Jodee on Twitter @JodeeMundy Auslan   Quotes: “I knew my family was deaf, but I didn’t realize that it meant that they couldn’t hear.”  Jodee Mundy “When interpreting, you have to change the source message into the source language.”  Jodee Mundy “Auslan is a three dimensional language that is like an incredibly dense comic strip.”  Jodee Mundy Want to create a big impact? Subscribe to the Deep Listening podcast and never miss an episode. Listen For Free

What do you want your employer to do with your feedback? This is bonus episode for subscribers only Deep Listening - The Managers Master Class Prototype request for feedback I am looking for 10 managers who can provide feedback on my course before I launch it this year The course is designed for managers who work in organisations of more than 500 employees It’s a commitment of 3 – 30 minute meetings to hear from you and listen to feedback that will improve the course for you and other managers I really value the fact to you are a loyal listener and this request is only going If this is you, send me an email podcast@oscartrimboli.com with the subject line The Managers Master Class

There is a huge amount of money being invested in engagement surveys. Are these surveys effective? Is there a way to make them more effective? My guest today shares lessons learned from other cultures that could improve the entire communication and listening process. Today, I am speaking to corporate anthropologist Michael Henderson as we explore the jungles of Africa, South America and the boardroom. Michael brings a perspective of listening to cultures. He  shares the role of engagement surveys and how they are question biased rather than listening biased. He also shares lessons learned from the Pygmy people and the three key elements for building a powerful culture. Today’s Topics: Why employee engagement surveys are question biased. Applying skillsets from anthropology into the business world. How the Pygmy people compare culture to a fire. The role of culture inside businesses and being a beacon in the dark. The importance of having three elements throughout cultures. Understanding what is actually meant not what is just said. Patterns and listening to context within corporations and listening to adjectives. Being conscious and listening deeply when people are speaking. Links and Resources: Michael Henderson Website Corporate Anthropology: Michael Henderson at TEDxAuckland   Quotes: “Engagement surveys end up being question biased rather than listening optimised. ” Michael Henderson “The world’s best engagement survey would be designed by the employees themselves.” Michael Henderson “I still ask what is your culture doing to light the way and be a beacon in the dark that attracts others to it?” Michael Henderson Want to create a big impact? Subscribe to the Deep Listening podcast and never miss an episode. Listen For Free

I am excited to have Jessica Watson on today’s show. Jessica became the youngest person to sail solo nonstop around the world. She was named Young Australian of the year in 2011 and received an OAM (Order of Australia Medal). She is co-founder of the marine startup Deckee and Youth Ambassador for The United Nations World Food Programme. She is currently working on her MBA and her second book, a novel published by Hachette. While Jessica was on her solo trip sailing around the world, she learned to sail with her ears as she listened to her boat to understand changes in the ocean and with weather conditions. She takes us on an amazing journey of how she sailed with her ears, and how she uses her deeper listening skills to conduct television interviews. She talks about the power of silence and not interrupting while listening. All in an effort to help people and groups listen to each other. Today’s Topics: How Jessica broke the news to her family about sailing solo around the world. Jessica kept focus using small goals and different milestones along the way. How Jessica sailed by her ears by listening to the sound of the water. There is constant noise from the boat and the roar of the waves. A noise that you are not used to can signal that something is wrong. How amazing it was for Jessica to have such amazing alone time. The role of listening when sailing and communicating with boat crews. The importance of letting others express their thoughts and feelings. How listening is a practice, discipline and a process. The power of listening, body language, and silence when interviewing people. Links and Resources: Deckee Order of Australia Medal UN World Food Programme Jessica on Twitter @watsonjessica Quotes: “My parents always told me that I could do anything I wanted to. I may have taken it further than they intended.” Jessica Watson “The way I told them (my parents) was probably more important than what I told them.” Jessica Watson “It’s easy to stay focused and not give up when you don’t have any other choice.” Jessica Watson Want to create a big impact? Subscribe to the Deep Listening podcast and never miss an episode. Listen For Free

One of the five elements of deep listening is making meaning from listening to others. My guests today are Sarah Manley and David Christie from Innovation Arts, a hybrid strategy consultancy and design agency. David is the founder and Sarah is a project manager, and they both use a form of visual communication called scribing to create solutions. During the scribing process, a graphic facilitator will create a visual map of a conversation, even if that conversation is between hundreds of people. Businesses and organizations face complex problems that are difficult to solve in a linear fashion. The scribing process creates a visual representation of the conversation and can be used to discover systems and solve complex issues. In this episode, we discuss this process along with focus, preparation and applying design thinking to solutions. Today’s Topics: David and Sarah met as part of a large team that created solutions for Y2K. The primary function of a graphic facilitator is to create a visual map of the conversation. How participants focus on listening to the conversation and the scribe does the work. Scribes listen with intent and make visuals of what they hear. How they listen to what is unsaid and make connections with ideas. Preparation includes a content briefing and learning about the company culture. Being fit and healthy is also mandatory. Having the discipline and mindset to stay focused the entire time. How it’s about being curious and engaged with helping people solve problems in the best way possible. People are beginning to understand the systemic nature of things.   Complex problems need to be mapped out and the skill set does not always exist. Applying design thinking to a range of problems people are seeing. Capturing the present, past and future in these visual maps. Bringing a meaningful approach to systemic listening. Links and Resources: Innovation Arts David Christie on Twitter @christoi David Christie on LinkedIn The Value Web David’s Website Sarah Manley on LinkedIn Sarah on Twitter @puppetopera Quotes: “If you're taking notes while listening to a conversation, you are not engaged in the most effective listening possible.” Sarah Manley “Scribes try their best to connect ideas and make connections with what is being said.” Sarah Manley “You have to think in terms of systems because everything is interconnected.” David Christie Want to create a big impact? Subscribe to the Deep Listening podcast and never miss an episode. Listen For Free

In this episode, I have the opportunity to speak with Alan Stokes. Alan is a journalist and a Lifeline Counsellor. Listen carefully as Alan explores the way that we can become more potent while on the telephone. He shares tips and tricks for becoming more effective when listening on the phone and really getting to the heart of what is being said. We also talk about authenticity and how to be deeply empathetic to the dialogue as it happens. We explore the role of judgement, and how it takes away from the impact of the conversation. Alan grew up in a beach family, surfing and body surfing. He always loved the escape and the silence of surfing. He also used to be a heavy drinker, when he first became a journalist. He has also struggled with mental illness which has helped define his world view and the importance of being listened to. Today’s Topics: Asking to have a talk instead of telling sad people to cheer up The difference between sympathy and empathy How reflection is giving back to someone what they have told you in meaning How Alan asked for professional help in his forties Problems have to be solved by the person with the problem How conversations are heightened during phone calls The importance of silence and the true mark of trust Minimal encouragers or reminding the person on the line that you are there Avoiding lecturing or making someone feel interrogated Empowering people with open questions, such as how does it feel How “why” questions can be loaded with judgement Physicality and sitting in an open position and looking interested Getting into the right mindset and being ready to listen How Alan’s journalistic background has served him at Lifeline Importance of bringing out the unsaid Links and Resources: Ring 131114 in Australia Lifeline Australia 000 If you are in crisis Quotes: “If someone says they are not okay, listen acutely and sit with them as they talk.” Alan Stokes “Don’t judge, be an empathetic shoulder that sits with someone during their pain.” Alan Stokes “What helps the sad person is empathy and making it about them, not me or the person listening.” Alan Stokes Want to create a big impact? Subscribe to the Deep Listening podcast and never miss an episode. Listen For Free

Jennifer MacLaughlin is an Auslan Interpreter for the deaf community. Auslan has a similar language structure to Asian languages. The word order is different and the picture and scene is created first. The language is created in a visual sense. We explore a conversation where Jennifer was standing on stage translating an extraordinary piece of poetry to a group of people who were in the dark. I was moved by the energy that Jennifer brought to the conversation about what it means to listen deeply. Today’s Topics: How signing involves taking turns and respecting space and time Having to wait for concrete meaning before signing Jennifer shares her family life and how they moved to Australia for warmth How Jennifer became interested in Auslan after being prompted by a friend She has signed in many venues including corporate settings, universities, hospitals, and rallies Challenges of interpreting poetry and how Jennifer did this for 1,200 people in Hyde Park Staying focused with so many dimensions going on Feeling the energy of the person speaking and staying connected Unpacking the meaning of a word to make connotations very clear Really thinking about what you are saying when speaking Links and Resources: Auslan Services Video - Jennifer MacLaughlan AUSLan Interpreter - Deep Listening Impact beyond words Quotes: “Deaf people are very good at respecting people’s space and time and that is something that non-deaf people could benefit from.” Jennifer MacLaughlin “Interpreting is not about the words, it is about the meaning.” Jennifer MacLaughlin “Auslan is such a creative language that uses a 3D language to create pictures out of concepts.” Jennifer MacLaughlin Listen For Free

Welcome to Deep Listening, impact beyond words. Do you know that we spend 55% of our days listening? Yet, only 2% of us are trained on how to listen. Listening is the competitive advantage of the 21st century. Whether you are a business owner, executive, employee, or parent, this podcast will transform your impact through listening.    I’m your host Oscar Trimboli. Workplace research shows that the difference between good managers and great leaders is their ability to listen and actually hear their employees and customers. These organizations that have great leaders outperform the others by a factor of four. I have witnessed first hand the cost created by a lack of listening. With this podcast, I am going to help you create impact with your listening as we explore the five levels of listening. The Five Levels of Listening Listening to yourself Listening to the content Listening for the context Listening for what is unsaid Listening for meaning Quotes: “Listening and not speaking is the competitive advantage for the 21st century” Oscar Trimboli “I will provide you with tools, tips and techniques to move from an unconscious listener to one that creates a big impact.” Oscar Trimboli Want to create a big impact? Subscribe to the Deep Listening podcast and never miss an episode. Listen For Free