The Dildorks

This week we’re talking with Sinclair Sexsmith, writer, educator, and editor of the new book Best Lesbian Erotica of the Year, Volume 5! We touch on consent in erotica, the evolving definition of “lesbian,” disability representation in erotic media, and more. Alaska | Editing an Anthology | Fantasy vs. Reality | What is “Lesbian”? | Trans Representation | Mind Expansion | Pushback | Erotic But Not Sexual | Marketing & Messaging | Old Erotica Books | Underrepresented People | Disability & Chronic Pain | Generating Ideas Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.  

Some people love being single, some hate it… Whatever your opinion may be, this week we’re discussing the single life! Election News | Bad at Being Single | “Are You Single?” | Friendships | List of Priorities | Stigmatizing Singlehood | Gender Dynamics | Couples’ Privilege & Amatonormativity | Pestered by Family | Bear Bergman Column | Dealing with Loneliness | Self-Love | Recovering From Breakups | Change & Growth | Attention-Seeking | Texting Exes Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.  

This podcast discusses marriage proposals and engagement, including unconventional approaches. They explore the excitement and anticipation of getting engaged, the symbolism of engagement rings, and the contrast between engagement rings and collars in relationships. They also touch on commitment in non-monogamous relationships and the importance of effective communication and understanding.

Your sexual sensitivity can affect your enjoyment, self-esteem and more – so this week we’re discussing some of our best tricks for managing sensitivity-related issues! Ideas During Sex | “Shoulds” | Compared to Average | Sensitivity vs. Orgasm | Pumps | Weed | Libido-Boosting Products | Antidepressants | #OrgasmQuest | Monster Under the Bed | Testosterone | Dialing It Back | Indirect Stimulation | Increasing Sensitivity | Fantasizing | Vibrators | Feeling Guilty | Arousal Gels | Sexualizing Desensitization Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.  

What does it mean to be in a 24/7 D/s dynamic, why is it hot, and why is it comforting? This week we're discussing round-the-clock power exchange! Always Kinky | Horny All the Time?! | Intimacy & Interdependence | Organizing Principle | Self-Improvement | Moral Responsibility | Protocol | Conditioning | Risk Assessment | Off-Limits Areas | Blue Balls 4 Biden | Getting What You Want | Importance | When You’re Not Feelin’ It | Limited Bandwidth | Kink in Public Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.  

This week we’re addressing some of your questions about boundaries, especially as they pertain to sex, friendships, and non-monogamy! Inappropriate Client | Episode Name | Nervous Partner | “Good-Natured Ribbing” | Anger | Intimacy Before Sex | Gone Horribly Wrong | Seeking Approval | Threesome Aftercare Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.  

Setting boundaries is hard, but important! This week we’re discussing the tricky business of drawing a line in the sand, with romantic partners and in general. Yelling | COVID-Era Boundaries | Boundaries vs. Rules | Why They’re Useful | Ultimatums | Complications | Checking Back In | What Makes It Easier? | Sooner is Better | Bad Reactions | Being Nice | Bullshit Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.  

How do you figure out whether a potential kink partner is safe enough and a good enough match with you before you do anything with them? This week we’re discussing the fine art of vetting! Casual Slapping | What Is Vetting? | Thresholds | Slut Referral Network | Consent Cues | “One of My People” | Social Capital | Direct vs. Indirect | Safewording | Storytelling | Pre-Emptive Domming | Framing Devices | Role-Modelling | Saying No | Making Excuses | Attachment Styles | Body Language | 2nd or 3rd Date | Disclosing Gender Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.  

This week we’re talking with polyamory-experienced psychotherapist Jessica Fern about her excellent new book, Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma, & Consensual Nonmonogamy. Filtering the Monogamy Out | Origin Story | Structure as Security | Take Responsibility For Your Feelings | Clementine Morrigan’s Trauma-Informed Polyamory | Self-Regulation & Auto-Regulation | Parts Work | Common Problems | Taking Breaks | Giving Up | Ideal Relationship Styles | Having Your Shit Figured Out | Empowerment & Healing | Dealing with Therapists Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.  

Crying is good for the soul, but did you know it can also be good for the libido? This week we’re discussing the kinky appeal of crying: cathartic sadomasochism, dacryphilia, emotional sex, and more! Other Catharses | Health Benefits | Masculinity & Vulnerability | That’s a Thing?! | Sadism & Emotional Topping | Emo Aesthetic | Ruining Something Beautiful | Sensual Pleasure | Feeling Cute | Good vs. Bad Crying | Sadness | Crying-Focused Scene | Bursting Into Tears | Runny Makeup | Unicorn Tears | Mezcal Negroni | Sixth Hour | Negotiation | Therapeutic vs. Therapy | Secrets | Tears in Sex | Medical Play | What to Do | Feeling Guilty | #BirthdayBruises Credits:Music by PROTODOMEArtwork by Addison FinchBecome a patron to support the show and get access to our private Discord, monthly bonus episodes, and your name mentioned on the show.