Open Your Eyes with McKay Christensen

In this episode of the Open Your Eyes podcast, McKay talks about taking the positive approach in life.  Have you ever known someone who just seems to have a critical nature?  What was it like to be around them?  It’s easy for you, and me, to get in the habit of being critical or negative, and soon we may not even be aware that we are that way.  At the end of the day, we can choose to take the positive approach with people and ourselves. And that’s just why our host finds this topic important to discuss today. As Norman Vincent Peale said: “A positive thinker does not refuse to recognize the negative; he refuses to dwell on it. Positive thinking is a form of thought which habitually looks for the best results from the worst conditions.” Weaving stories of positivity about greats like Henry Longfellow and Vincent Peale, McKay inspires the audience to not only believe in the positive approach, but also to adhere to it too.  Most importantly, he wants the audience to remember that negativity can be a force for good, but it can also be all-consuming. We don’t need to completely eradicate all negativity from our lives to become more optimistic individuals.  In fact, some of the most positive people have the darkest pasts.  So why not take the positive and growth oriented approach?  We have nothing to lose. The Finer Details of This Episode: Henry Longfellow’s positive determinationWhy negativity is contagious Firing neurons and their patternsThe returns of the positive approachWashing your metaphorical “dirty window”“Post It Note therapy”Quotes: “​​A negative view can rob you of some very important things.  The first thing you lose is yourself.  You see, you can’t take the negative approach and not lose a part of you in the process. Because your patterns of negative thinking soon turn from others to you.”“So when you have a thought, your brain searches for patterns to connect to, and if your established patterns are negative, you will think negative—even if it’s about yourself.”“A positive thinker does not refuse to recognize the negative; he refuses to dwell on it. Positive thinking is a form of thought which habitually looks for the best results from the worst conditions.”“Sure enough, the view from our window, our belief window, can get stained with our own negative view and this tends to stain what we see around us.”“And watch what will happen, yes, you will get better results with people, but you, your thought patterns, how you feel about yourself will improve.”Links: https://www.mckaychristensen.org/

Do you ever feel like life is unfair?  While it is true life has its disadvantages, there are also unfair advantages, if we can open our eyes to see them. That’s what McKay talks about on this episode of the Open Your Eyes podcast.  Hurdles, roadblocks, and inequities are inevitable.  But if we look closely, we can see how those inequities can set us up to have an unfair advantage.  After all, disappointments are often blessings in disguise. We can find a real silver lining in and grow from loss and disappointment that sometimes comes our way.In this episode, McKay walks us through the steps necessary to start looking for the unfair advantage.  With lessons about pursuing the path presented and working smarter, McKay’s ultimate goal is to help listeners embrace the uncomfortable and reach their true potential.  So listen to this special episode and start seeking out the unfair advantage in your own life.  The Finer Details of This Episode: Why change isn’t always fairUsing inequity in our favorGrowing from lossPursuing the path presentedWorking smarterEmbracing the wildly uncomfortableQuotes: “Life forces another wing to be added.  We have to remodel a worn out room, change something about ourselves we don’t want to change, and much of what has to change or get remodeled in our life isn’t always fair.”“Tragedy, illness, and other inequitable things will come our way. In a small way, I can relate. I have lived my entire life with pain, primarily back pain, from an accident at the age of 15. But through the years that pain has kept me more humble, more prayerful, and hopeful. Yes, it would be easier without it, but I can’t imagine who I would be without it.”“But it’s a great lesson in life to see how things can and do lean in our favor.”“Now losses in life aren’t always compensated or unfairness always repaired. And all of us should be in the business of helping others like Jennie Taylor with the means to support her family. But I do believe that we grow and become who we are supposed to be through things that are unfair.”“When things work against us, it can empower us to learn how to not just work hard but work smart.”“As you have likely heard, success leaves clues. You can learn a lot, gain unfair advantages from watching and learning from what other people do.”Links: https://www.mckaychristensen.org/

McKay goes all in today as he gives inspiring advice and recalls powerful anecdotes about, well, going all in.  Whether we want to start hitting the gym more, spend more time with our family, start a business, or take that vacation we’ve always been talking about, making changes in our lives requires that we go all in.  Taking a page from Malcolm Gladwell’s book, McKay opens up this episode with a few brief notes on tipping points and, more importantly, how to create them in our own lives.  And according to McKay, it all starts with us.  Getting to know ourselves completely is the first step to going all in.  That’s why, on this very important episode, he discusses how to reckon with our blindspots, shadow selves, and aspirations.  McKay believes that when we shed light on our conscious and unconscious selves, we can truly begin to ally our dreams with actions.  This path is rarely straightforward though, and making that first step is, more often than not, the hardest part.  So if you’re interested in going all in like the cast of characters that McKay talks about today, tune into this episode to see how you too can align your aspirations with your actions.  The Finer Details of This Episode: Tipping pointsOur shadow selfHow blindspots drive usAligning our aspirations with our actionGetting to know your goalsThe fuzzy front endEducated guessesQuotes: “And there are dozens of other examples. Now, what about your business? Is the tipping point possible? And if so, how do you get your team all in? What about your life? How do you get to the point personally where you are all in?”“Now, when saying ‘shadow self’, you may think it is the dark side of our personality, and that wouldn't be accurate. It's better described as the blind spot of our psyche, meaning the things that make up our persona that we're not aware of or fully consider. Or in our conscious thought, our shadow selves might hold guilt, emotions, or thoughts that may be difficult to accept.”“I believe to be all in, to create the full momentum in our life, and arrive at the person we know we can be, we can come to understand our blind spots and begin to align our behavior accordingly.”“In short, shadow work is bringing those blind or disregarded parts of you to light through awareness, like opening your eyes, curiosity, and intention.”“Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life, and you will call it fate.”“The strength of the pack is the wolf. And the strength of the wolf is the pack. You see, both your actions and your aspirations, like the wolf and the pack, must be aligned. Actions grow aspiration and aspiration grows action.”“All in sometimes requires an educated guess, and pressing forward with that guess. And if you've decided to make a change, don't wait for perfect clarity.”Links: https://www.mckaychristensen.org/

In today’s episode, McKay talks about wrestling with weaknesses, how to overcome them, and why everyone is capable of doing so.  Opening up the podcast with two stories about wrestling, he talks about experiences fighting both literal and figurative bears.  And while most of us have yet to wrestle with a 400 lb grizzly, we do wrestle with daily struggles that make us feel like we’ve been punched in the gut.  That’s why McKay spends the majority of the episode talking about how to win that fight.From learning the price of happiness and working from the outside in to focusing on who you stand with and having a healthy body, our host highlights all the ways you can commit to overcoming that weakness, whether it be physical, spiritual, or psychological.  It all stems from a willingness to seek out answers to the problems we want to solve– a willingness to find victories even in moments of weakness, in fact, especially in weakness.  So join McKay on this episode as he meditates deeply on how to win that daily wrestle and take your life back.  The Finer Details of this Episode: Bear wrestlingWinning the wrestle with weaknessThe price of happinessWorking from outside in Who you stand withHaving a healthy bodySpiritual and psychological well beingPaying attention to the wrestleCommitting to overcoming weaknessQuotes: “We all have wrestles in our life - with people, purpose, and ourselves from time to time. In some of those cases, you may feel like you are wrestling with a 400 pound bear who's tossing you wherever he wants to toss you.”“The wrestle with life is hard, and it will sucker punch you in the gut. But it is beautiful and will give sunshine, rainbows, peace, and happiness, if you will pay the price for peace and happiness.”“You haven't been to the store, your kids are being annoying, you have 10 things to do, and no time to do it. This is the time when your weaknesses manifest the most.”“The cracked screen on our phone that remains unrepaired actually drains energy from us. So a clean and tidy environment does give us strength.”“How you stand with people is a critically important part of winning your wrestle.”“​​And I wonder if John Witherspoon's influence as the first president of Princeton University wasn't reaching down through the generations to inspire Reese to pursue her education. You see, who we stand with can and does make a difference in winning our wrestle in life.”“By paying attention to our wrestle and seeking answers, we open ourselves up to the solutions that may come into our lives.”“When anyone asks Jake about what it's like to lose his sight, he always answers that it wasn't what he lost that changed him; it's what he found.”Links: https://www.mckaychristensen.org/ 

Today on the podcast, McKay chats about making tough choices, the Endowment Effect, and why great risks can have great rewards.  Opening up the episode with a story about two men’s dangerous descent down the face of Peru’s Siula Grande, McKay details the hardest decision of one of their lives and what it’s like to work under pressure.  From picking flavors at the ice cream shop to a marriage proposal, choices follow us everywhere, even when we think we don’t have any.  Feeling helpless or trapped?  There is always a way out, but it isn’t always easy.  That’s why this episode is all about forgetting failure, forsaking the status quo, and paying attention to the mood.  The most important thing to remember, though, is that nothing changes unless you do.  Taking risks can be scary, but you also just might find that your best life may lie on the other side.  If McKay’s learned anything in his life, it’s that he’s never regretted making a bold choice, whether it went his way or not.  So take a note from the Christiansen book, and listen to what he has to say about decision making and why it’s okay to make the daring one.  The Finer Details of This Episode:Mount Huascaran and Yungay’s powerful earthquakeSimpson and Yates’ dangerous descentMaking tough choicesWhy life is your greatest instructorStatus Quo BiasFocusing on failureRisk and rewardsHow mood affects decision makingQuotes:“They enjoyed the thrill of their success only for a few minutes before the dread of the descent covered their thinking.  Why?  Because 80 percent of the deaths and accidents on climbs like this happen on the descent.”“If he cut the rope, he knew he would be sending his friend below him to a certain death.  But if he didn’t cut the rope he would fall along with Joe and likely die as well.  There was no good choice.  How do you choose?”“Some of us don’t like to make a choice, because the consequences are hard to live with, and impact us and others.”“We make bad judgments, lack experience, misread, misinterpret, and mistake the wrong thing for the right thing. And life is tough. Life teaches us there are consequences for bad choices. And, as a result, we may shy away from those choices.”“What is often true is: you can’t change the cards you are dealt with, but you can change how you play them.”“When faced with a choice that involves an element of risk, the vast majority of people will choose what they have: the status quo.”“I get feeling helpless or trapped.  I have felt this way before, but there is something liberating and energizing about choosing.”“And it may be time to make the bolder choice, to purposefully act against mood and the status quo in your life.  If you don’t feel like it, that very mood and feeling may be telling you to choose it anyway.  Your best life may be found on the other side of today’s difficult choice.”Links:https://www.mckaychristensen.org/ 

Each year, in early March, a little Alaskan town called Nome acts as the finish line for the world’s longest and most spectacular race—the Iditarod Trail Sled Dog Race. The race extends over 938 miles from Anchorage to Nome (more than the length of Texas), with the course record standing at seven days and fourteen hours, including two days of required rest for the dog teams. One of the most famous mushers (drivers) in the Iditarod’s history is Aliy Zirkle, who competed in twenty-one races but never won, despite coming close multiple times. Many people might see this as a failure or a disappointment, but Ali herself flipped the script and defined her own success, knowing that she was one of the most remarkable mushers in history and not buying into any negative narrative about her race record.Flipping the script is something we can all do, and on today’s episode, McKay discusses how to do it and reap the rewards. First up, he discusses negative thoughts and the huge drain they put on our time and energy. He suggests that these thoughts can be flipped by spending time each day writing a new script that fills your mind with positive thoughts to sustain you through the day. This is an important skill both for ourselves and those around us, and McKay uses the example of how parents may be scripting anxiety into their kids to illustrate the impact that flipping the script to something more positive can have on our loved ones. Another script-flipping skill McKay advocates is the ability to look into the future and see things as our future self would see them. He uses the example of singer Donnie Osmond, whose career was judged to be over many times but who kept reinventing himself, repeatedly flipping the script on his career to create new opportunities for success. McKay closes the episode by discussing how to know when it’s the right time to flip our script and why it’s worth the effort to get a fresh perspective on our goals.The Finer Details of This Episode:Alaska and the Iditarod Trail Sled Dog Race Aliy Zirkle and her quest to win the Iditarod Flipping the script and defining your own success Are we scripting anxiety into our kids? How Donnie Osmond flipped the script to let his talent shineQuotes:“The Iditarod Trail Sled Dog Race is run early March of each year. And in that race, mushers and their dog teams travel from Anchorage in the south, across the state and up the coast to Nome in the north. In total, the race extends 938 miles. And that’s farther than the length of Texas.”“Would it be nice to win? Yes. But she doesn’t buy into the script that others have written that she is not a real success. She is, in fact, one of the most remarkable mushers in history. And the same goes for you and me. We, like Aliy, can flip the script on whatever we’re attempting in life.”“Flipping the script has more to do with filling your thoughts with your new script, which will put aside the negative thoughts we might typically have. And most experts in personal change will say that you need to write that script that will consume your thoughts each day, that the first fifteen to thirty minutes of each day is what will prime your thinking for the rest of the day. So I call this time each morning the Flip the Script Session.”“As a father, I used to replay the script in my mind of how hard it was to raise kids. But now, as a grandfather, I have flipped the script. I would pay ten times $300,000 to have the joy and opportunity to do it again. I wish I could flip the time and go back and rescript myself while I was raising kids and have the perspective I do now. I would be a much happier, patient, and better father.”“When you flip the script, the outcome may be the same, you might even fail. But when you flip the script, you’re giving yourself more opportunities for success. And perhaps the success is measured by just finishing the task or just enduring the heartbreak or not falling into old patterns or practicing something new and sticking to your goals of what’s important to you.”Show Links:Open Your Eyes with McKay Christensen

Sometimes, in life, we can forget who we are.  The way of the world, comparisons, circumstances can rob us of our view of our true value and potential.  Often, the world attempts to define who we are or tell us we are something other than who we know we can be. But when we remember who we are, we become empowered.  And the same goes for teams, organizations and families.On today’s episode, McKay dives into how we can remember who we are.  McKay opens with a moving story about Humboldt Canada and the tragic events of the Humboldt Bronco Hockey Team. He recounts the experience of Scott Thomas after losing his son, Evan, and what the city of Humboldt did to remember who they were as a city and who the players were as a team.  McKay reviews why it’s so important to remind yourself of who you are, where you’re going, and why.  Too often, failure and others’ opinions prevent us from embracing ourselves.  Take the MLB’s Nolan Ryan for example, who nearly let his hall-of-fame professional career slip away, purely because he lacked confidence.  McKay also goes on to tackle some techniques that can help you stay authentic, such as journaling, avoiding doubt and dabble, and ultimately feeding your faith.  As you will hear today, you’re the only person who knows you best, and it’s important to listen to that. The Finer Details of This Episode: The origins of GoFundMeThe Humboldt Bronco’s bus accident Staying true to your choicesNolan Ryan’s journey to the MLBReminding yourself where you want to goThe value of journaling Don’t doubt or dabbleFeeding your faithQuotes: “That day when Evan came home from school, he was crying and trying desperately to wipe the birthmark from his cheek. He tried and tried again to wash it away, but wasn't able to do so. And he wondered why God had given him this mark on his cheek.”“And everyone knew it meant that their son, if still at the scene, was gone.”“It was his birthmark, the mark on his cheek that his dad looked for when he came to recognize Evan.  It was his birthmark, the mark that he never wanted on his cheek that helped his dad recognize him when it was his dad's time to identify him.”“Always remember, you are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, smarter than you think, and twice as valuable than you ever imagined. Sometimes the world attempts to define who we are, or tell us we are something other than who we know we can be.”“If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. The hard is what makes it great. Well, the players embrace the hard of it, and go on to find out who they really are.”“And one house after another had sticks set out hoping that those who had passed away would see that they are loved and that they remembered who they were. So put your sticks out so to speak and remind yourself frequently who you are. Next, write or talk to yourself.”“Likewise, it's easy for us to let the fungus of doubt or discouragement take over our livelihood. That's why we need an injection of faith every day: faith in ourselves, in our team, in the fact that there are good things– great things waiting for you in the future. So make it a point to feed your mind and soul with faith.”Links: Open Your Eyes with McKay Christensen

Do wishes come true?  In many ways our wishes dictate the direction we travel in life.  In this week’s episode, McKay discusses the principle that dreams we grant to others and seek for ourselves have the power to change lives.  It often takes a leader and first class noticer to make someone’s wish come true in the first place.  From Jason McElwain to Cary Elwes, McKay goes on to recount stories about wish makers, what they wish for, and how they turn wishes into reality.Above all else, McKay finds it important to note that we can realize our own wishes too, and that’s just what this episode is all about: making the right wishes and letting them serve as a guide. Among the stories he shares today is that of Shawn Bradley, NBA veteran and now quadriplegic, who, after getting hit by a car and losing movement in his body from the neck down, could’ve easily wished that everything was different or at least that he stayed in bed that fateful day.  Instead, he saw no value in wishing for a new life, and opted to become someone new; someone who embraces the circumstances he’s given. Be sure to listen in to today’s moving and inspirational episode to discover how you, too, can make others’ dreams come true, and lead life as you wish.    The Finer Details of This Episode: The Make-A-Wish FoundationJ Mac’s dream come trueMaking others’ dreams come trueCary Elwes’ casting in The Princess BrideLetting wishes be your guideShawn Bradley’s new purpose in lifeQuotes: “Wishes, the kind we grant for and give to others, and the kind we seek to be granted for ourselves, both have the power to change your life.”“And Jason had a wish. After becoming manager, Jason had a wish, and it was to sit on the sideline in a uniform as a real player for one game.”“At Boston, he ran a very impressive two hour and 57 minute marathon, proving to the world that he was indeed an elite athlete, and that wishes - the best wishes - do come true.”“It's one thing to use the word wish or to send someone a wish, but an entirely different thing to see a wish come about in someone's life by what you do. This takes a leader who is a first class noticer: someone who sees what other people are hoping for and then goes about helping to make that happen.”“Cary said from the first shot in which cantankerous Max appears poking his head through a wooden peep hole in the door, Billy Crystal began ad libbing for three days straight, 10 hours a day.  He improvised, never saying the same thing or the same line twice.”“Life tends to steer the same way. And if we wish we were more educated, the pull of such wishes tends to keep us interested in looking for a way to get that degree or become more educated.”“Shawn realizes that there's no value in wishing things were different, but there's tremendous value in wishing you can become something new.”Links: McKay Christensen Homepage

Have you ever thought about the person you will be in the future or what your future will look like? Your future is worth your attention.  Because the future you picture or imagine influences your actions today.In this week’s episode, McKay has an important question for you: What is your future worth? To help you envision your future self, he shares an incredibly touching story about a group of mountain climbers and the hard-learned lessons that turned their lives upside down. And we can all learn so much about climbs and attempts in life from their powerful story. As McKay says, it’s not about the climb, it’s about the climber. You are in the driver’s seat of your life, so take the wheel and change direction if you want to! For more insightful tips, join McKay here today as he illuminates the power of a perspective shift and the key principles for climbing your way to the top.The Finer Details of This Episode:The incredible story of mountain climbers Climbing back after you fallWorking hard today for a successful tomorrowPrinciples for achieving your future worthEnvisioning your future selfThe power of perspectiveQuotes:“In the end, Clinton is grateful for a few things - for the years he had with his wife, for his kids, and for the fact that a split second before the lightning struck, he had reclipped the belay device into an anchor in the rock and that belay kept the three climbers below him from falling off the mountain.”“I've come to learn this very important lesson about climbs and about attempts in life. It's not about the mountain. It's not about the lightning. It's not about the decisions or miscalculations or choices or circumstances. And it's not about who to blame. It's not, despite what Miley Cyrus thinks, about the climb. It is about the climber.”“Is the person you're hoping to become worth the effort you are making today?”“Here's the truth. The value of a future goal is the present change that it makes in you today.”“He said that when you live in poverty and squalor, you picture your future and put on that image. So you see yourself as the person you will become, not the person you are today, because the person you are today is too poor and too pitiful to identify with. It is the future that you become. It's imagining that future that is yet to come that gives you hope.”“The climb gives you perspective.”“My experience had been that when you move deliberately in the direction, you feel inspired to act. The confirmation of your decision will come, or you'll be inspired to know that you're on the wrong path. But sometimes you have to be on the path and walk forward a bit before you get that perspective and understanding.”“What's your future worth? It's worth the hard things you have to do today. It's worth the sacrifices you are making. It's worth the work to overcome your habits, and it's worth the climb.”Links:McKay Christensen Homepage

Too often in life, we get to thinking that we are less than capable of doing what we set out to do.  But the truth is:  we are better than we think. So, how do you find the best within you?   In this week’s episode, McKay shares some valuable tips for finding the best within you and discovering your own potential. He talks about the dangers of making excuses, why it’s important to take calculated risks in life, and how to rise to your true self. As he nicely puts it, you are way better than you think, even though you might not see it at the moment. However, you’re not alone in this; most people get so caught up in the chaos of everyday life that they miss the beauty of it all. That’s precisely why it is so important for you to tune in today, and learn how you, too, can turn things around and find the best within you.The Finer Details of This Episode:Enjoying the beauty of the moment Recognizing your own potentialDangers of making excusesTaking calculated risksFulfilling your dreamsRisk-taking for a better lifeBelieving in your true valueQuotes:“Because people are so busy and focused on their day, they miss the beauty and rarity of the moment.”“In life, there are so many things around us that are, in fact, better than we think. People are better than we think. Circumstances, our life, kids, job, our own potential, often are much better than we think. ”“You are better than you think.”“Over time, it becomes more of a habit to talk than to walk.”“Most of us have ideas or dreams of what we'd love to do. And we make an assessment and the impossibility of the thing takes over. And soon we place the idea on the shelf hoping that someday we can dust it off, open it up and dream a bit more.”“To find the best in us, we must risk a bit of ourselves - our pride, our time, our effort. It's the risk that teaches us to value the outcome.”“It's in the risk of it that we learn to bring out the best in us.”Links:McKay Christensen Homepage