The Overwhelmed Brain

Paul Colaianni: Relationship and Emotional Abuse Expert
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May 22, 2022 • 1h 6min

Will you ever be good enough?

When you are mistreated in some way and made to feel less than dirt, do you accept that you are as you are treated or that you are as you choose to be? Don't let other people's perceptions of you define you. Hold yourself to a certain standard and watch everyone else change or leave. It's not easy, of course. But it is very useful.
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May 15, 2022 • 1h 1min

The rut of waiting for someone else to decide before you can move on

If you're waiting for someone to make a decision so that you can figure out which direction to go, you might be waiting a while. Some people are very comfortable in their indecision and don't mind how long they stay in the rut. Sometimes they never decide and that means there's a point where you have to move because they never will. I talk about that and also talk about apologies and forgiveness, which can sometimes go hand in hand with being in a rut.
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May 8, 2022 • 31min

Carrying around the burden of someone else's secret

What do you do when someone you care about tells you a secret that affects other people you care about? Do you follow your heart or your values? Does your moral compass activate and make you express the secret to those who should know? A dilemma like this seems like it has no real good answer.
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May 1, 2022 • 1h 3min

Getting stalked online and there's something about love you should know

I got a letter from someone who is being stalked online by her ex-boyfriend's wife. She has nothing to do with this person, yet she is a target. Is there a way out of this crazy mess? In segment two, I talk about a message I received about making a decision on the relationship after feelings change. This is a packed episode.
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Apr 24, 2022 • 56min

When you're "on" too much for others but not enough for yourself

When you're always "on," it means you put on your game face in every interaction with others. It's like being in customer service and having to smile at every single customer that walks in the door. Do this all day and you'll probably want to crawl inside your shell when you get home. In today's episode, I talk about what this is like from celebrities to baristas to anyone that feels like they need to be "on" all the time.
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Apr 17, 2022 • 1h 16min

Pretending to be the person you're not

Pretending is draining. When you're unwell and you show the world you're doing great, you lose energy, dissolve relationships, and turn people off. This episode is about learning what a pretender is to help you avoid sabotaging your own path to happiness.
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Apr 10, 2022 • 55min

Stopping the head games

When someone plays head games with you, they're not telling you the whole truth. Perhaps they are lying altogether. The problem is, you can't always pinpoint what they're doing, you just know something's not right. What to do... I try to tackle that today.
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Apr 3, 2022 • 55min

When is it time to wean your parents off of you?

There's a point where you've left the nest and started living your own life. But some parents haven't let you go. Some tell you how to live your life. Some are just toxic and won't leave you alone or stop telling you what to do. And some just don't want to let go of the parenting role because they think you can't handle life. There's a point you have to help them let you go.
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Mar 27, 2022 • 1h 13min

To compromise, sacrifice, or support no matter what

When it comes to relationships, I think it's best to support the other person as much as possible. The trick is doing so while you disagree with what they're doing. Choosing to instead reject or deny what they want to do for themselves could lead to tension and changes of behavior you may not like. Is it best to sacrifice who you are for them? Or can you reach a compromise? Sometimes even supporting someone you love isn't enough.
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Mar 20, 2022 • 1h 16min

Balancing your life with only those things and people that matter

Sometimes a friendship takes an unexpected turn. Who you thought was your bestie suddenly leaves you out of an important event in their life or doesn't share things they used to share with you. What's going on in that case? Have they changed? Are they suddenly unhappy with you? I talk about that and also read a message from someone who is looking for the mental fortitude to create forward momentum in his life. Visit https://theoverwhelmedbrain.com for more episodes

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