Foreplay Radio – Couples and Sex Therapy

Do you find that you and your partner keep having the same arguments over and over, even though you're fighting about different things? If this is you, you won't want to miss this episode! Today's show is all about the negative cycle. Our hosts work to help couples organize what is happening and how couples can stop pointing the finger at each other and blame the cycle instead. Through this lens couples can feel more security and confidence in their interactions rather than thinking they have to solve each and every issue that comes up. If we don't start to see the cycle, the problems can feel endless and overwhelming! Make sure you stay on till the end to get George's homework assignment and head on over to our IG @foreply_sextherapypodcast and let us know your thoughts in the comments. Are you looking for more beyond our podcast? We're enrolling now for our couples retreat in October. Therapists interested in incorporating EFT and sex in the cycle? Join us in Nashville in January for our next therapist training. Visit www.foreplayrst.com to sign up today!Check out our sponsors (and support the podcast!):Addyi.com -- FDA-approved treatment for certain women with low libido!Uberlube.com -- Laurie's favorite lubricant! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Foreplay listeners, join us today in a 'School of Love' lesson all about the withdrawer's world! Withdrawers are often shutting down, walking away or seeming closed off in the cycle. These moves help them get safe and regulated but are a step in the negative cycle because the pursuing partner is left alone. When we can slow down, and be patient we can help to reveal the vulnerable underbelly of the emotional and sexual withdrawer. In two amazing role plays, hosts Laurie and George display exactly how to get slow, and get curious to learn about the ouch underneath the protective move. Vulnerability is the solution to the negative cycle and so much healing lies in these conversations. Withdrawing partners may often feel like they are messing up, a failure or that something is wrong with them. Pursuing partners may try to help by jumping in to reassure but this would be like diving into the shallow end of a pool. Staying in the deep but being there together is where the change happens. Let us know what notes you take from today's show and as always keep it hot y'all!Please help the podcast by using our great sponsors!ForiaWellness.com/foreplay -- products to help you get and stay aroused!RocketMoney.com -- gain some money back in your budget by having Rocket Money find and cancel your unused subscriptions! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

When we’re in distress as a couple, it’s hard to see that our partners protective moves - either criticism or withdrawal - are really ways that they are covering their deeper hurt, pain and vulnerability. But in order not to be lost to each other, first, we need to recognize that we are in a cycle where our partner triggers us and we trigger our partner… over and over. Secondly, we have to allow enough space for our partner to express themselves without expressing our pain at the same time. We have to let them go first. Third, we have to get curious about the deeper meaning of their protective moves. Do they go away because they feel like they’ll never measure up? Do they harp on relational issues because ironically, they want us to have a better relationship? Join George and Laurie today as they work through not just one, but two role plays in both the emotional and s*xual cycle and share with listeners what lies below the surface. To be successful here, listeners are reminded to have an understanding of the moves of their negative cycle and how each partner contributes. This way we can slow down, practice patience and have empathy for one another's vulnerabilities. Learning this process helps lovers meet one another in places where they previously left each other. Interested in working with an EFT couples therapist? Visit www.iceeft.com and head over to our IG @foreplay_sextherapypodcast. Let us know what you want to hear from us next. Keep it hot y'all!Check out our great sponsors!RocketMoney.com -- Stop those unused subscriptions from renewing! Rocket Money does the work for you!Uberlube.com -- Laurie's 20+ year favorite lubricant! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Today we're talking between the sheets or rather how to break the silence between the sheets. We always say that if you can talk about sex then you can have great sex. But what happens when you don't know what to talk about? Join our hosts today as they bring up how to start a sexy conversation and what to share with your intimate partner. Conversation might start with ideas about romance, foreplay, turn ons and lead to fantasies and more! The art of having these chats enhances your intimate world and deepens the bond that couples share. If you find yourself stuck in a sex rut, this episode can help you break out of the mundane and explore a more playful, fun side of sex with your honey. Keep it hot y'all!Check out our fantastic sponsors (and help support Foreplay!):Foriawellness.com/foreplay -- great massage oils to enhance your erotic times! The code 'foreplay' gets you 20% off your first order!Addyi.com -- an FDA-approved drug for certain premenopausal women with low libido! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

In last week's episode we discussed the purpose of the protected moves. On today's show we are going deeper to the "ouch," the pain, the vulnerability that lies below that protection. George and Laurie invite listeners today to explore the pain that we can all feel when we experience rejection, shame or worthlessness in an interaction with our partner. They acknowledge that this is a HEAVY topic but an important one if we want to understand our moves in the cycle, ourselves and our partners on a deeper level. You may want to avoid these conversations but this is where we need conversation the most. Grab your pencil and take notes during the school of love lesson. Believe it or not, understanding the ouch can lead to a bigger, better O! Please consider partnering with us by using our sponsors:RocketMoney.com/foreplay -- Get rid of those automatically renewing subscriptions that you don't use that are money down the drain!Uberlube.com -- Lauries favoritest lubricant! Be sure to use the code foreplay at checkout to get your 10% discount! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Do you ever wonder why you get angry in a fight? Have you been unsure why conflict makes you want to run? Join George and Laurie in today's episode to learn the purpose of your protective move, the healthy function it is trying to achieve and the impact it has on you and your partner. These moves, often seen as fight or flight are there to keep us safe and in some way to protect the relationship. However, this is where a negative cycle forms as each partner's protective move triggers a move in their partner and round and round we go. If you have been caught in this cycle you know just how exhausting it can be and probably have thought if we could just talk about it now, or if we could just take some space it would be SO MUCH BETTER! Learn with us today in this episode all about protective moves and how you can slow down and begin developing new moves, ones that can keep you connected with your partner. Get connected and keep it hot y'all!Check out our great sponsor:Foriawellness.com/foreplay -- check out their sex-enhancing oils! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Discover the emotional and sexual cycles that drive relationship dynamics! The hosts break down how our brains react to perceived threats and explore the damaging effects of emotional disconnection. Learn about the roles partners play and the intention behind their actions. They emphasize the power of curiosity as an antidote to anxiety and highlight the importance of understanding attachment styles. Communication emerges as key in addressing withdrawal and fostering deeper emotional connections. Tune in for insights that could transform your relationships!

Discover how secure sex can be thrilling and passionate, transcending the ordinary for extraordinary connections. Learn the key components of creating secure sexual attachment, such as repair, owning your actions, and showing appreciation. Find out how great lovers keep their sex life hot through the years with trust, vulnerability, and communication. Don't miss tips on enhancing intimacy and managing finances for a more satisfying relationship.

This episode is dedicated to Dr. Sue Johnson, the founder of EFT and a beloved mentor, teacher and friend. We remember her legacy and devotion to helping couples love better. George and Laurie have been heavily influenced by Sue's contributions to the field of couple therapy, moving treatment from a predominant focus on behavioral change to creating healthy attachments and secure, loving bonds. Join us today, to connect over this profound loss and to hear the stories and memories we have with Dr. Sue Johnson. You won't want to miss out on what she thought about George's driving skills! Thank you Sue for your incredible work in this field and for the influence, information, education and love you shared. You will be missed greatly!EFT Therapists! Laurie is coming to Chicago this month! Come join her!Please visit our great sponsors:Addyi.com -- an FDA-approved drug for certain per-menapausal women with low libido.Uberlube.com -- Laurie's favorite lubricant for the past 25 years! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome Foreplay listeners to another episode in our school of love series. Our residential relationship experts share with us the 4 things that stop progress and connection in relationships. The three A's abuse, addiction, affair and finally a partner not willing to take enough of a risk to re-connect. Join George and Laurie as they succinctly breakdown these roadblocks to connection and share what needs to happen first if any are present in your relationship. Our hosts remind us that safety in EFT is paramount and we can only get closer when there is a shared level of safety between partners. This episode is a must listen if you are facing any of these factors that may make connection impossible. Tune in today with an open mind and heart and another reminder that you are not alone!Check out our faithful sponsors (supporting them supports us!):Addyi.com -- A drug for women with low libido! Use the code 'Foreplay' for a $10 telemedicine consultation to see if Addyi is right for you.ForiaWellness.com/foreplay -- Foria has great products to enhance your sex life. Use the code 'Foreplay' for 20% off your first order! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices