Normalizing Non-Monogamy - Interviews in Polyamory and Swinging

Meshai and Fin team up together to answer amazing listener questions every fourth Friday of each month!   Today's questions are about advice for a couple who is considering a polyamorous quad with their best friends who just opened their relationship AND curiosity about making comparisons in non-monogamy.   If YOU have a question, we'd love to hear it! Please, ask us anything by clicking here!   You likely know me (Fin) from over 300 episodes of Normalizing Non-Monogamy. Just in case you don't, I cohost the podcast with my partner Emma and we have been in an open relationship together for over 15 years. I am also working towards completing a sex and relationship coaching program through the Somatica Institute and will be finished in late spring 2024.   We are super excited to be partnering with Meshai for the Ask Us Anything episodes! She first appeared on the podcast on Episode 233 and we're honored to have her back!   Meshai is relationship coach with the team at Expansive Connection. She believes in the power of living as one’s authentic self, and the freedom that comes from changing perspectives. She loves putting the puzzle pieces of a couple's sexual energy together and aiding them in positive and explorative movement.   Her coaching work implements creative synergy, openness, self-expression, and the confrontation of challenges through self-determination. She helps individuals from diverse populations move forward with their goals while being fully aware that trauma can play on the whole person.   Meshai is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and is certified in both Trauma Therapy and Sex Therapy, and she is trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy.   Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Evita is back after almost 100 episodes and we're so excited! She's been exploring non-monogamy for over a decade and brings so many different experiences and perspectives to this interview. Evita originally got into non-monogamy while swinging with her former husband. One of the main themes of this conversation is around how her approach to non-monogamy and relationships has shifted as a solo person without an anchor partner. She speaks vulnerably about the tenderness and care she needs to give herself on this journey to protect herself physically and emotionally. She also speaks to the power that comes from advocating for yourself and how hard it often is to do. Evita has also just released a new book! A Polyamory Devotional: 365 Daily Reflections for the Consensually Nonmonogamous is available now! Please grab yourself a copy and check out all of Evita's work and coaching on her LinkTree. Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Sarah and George are back after more than two years! The first time they came on was on episode 169 under the pseudonyms Alice and Sam. But, never fear... You don't HAVE to go listen to that episode in order to get a ton out of this powerful conversation. They've been living together for over seven years and their relationship was open from the beginning. Non-monogamy was new to George when Sarah introduced him to it on one of their first dates. Since then, the journey of non-monogamy has taken many forms over the years. Today, they've arrived in a place where they're both exploring polyamory in their own way. This conversation digs into the really powerful work they have done to deepen their connection, while at the same time, fostering and supporting autonomy for one another. We absolutely love this conversation and hope you do as well. Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Jo and her husband have been together for 18 years and have been exploring swinging for 17 of those years. They initially opened their relationship as a way for Jo to explore her bisexuality and things evolved from there. They're primarily exploring the swinging lifestyle and yet, swinging has always been about way more than just sex for them. We love this conversation for a few reasons... The first is that we get a really incredible look at the early days of what getting into swinging looked like for Jo and her husband. At the same time, we get to see what the evolution has looked like for them over nearly two decades. And, lucky us, we also get to have an incredible discussion about the shifts and growth they're both in the middle of right now. Jo is also the host of The Confident Swinger podcast and she's a confidence and lifestyle coach who loves helping people turn their dreams into a reality. Please check out her podcast and work over at www.theconfidentswinger.com. Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

This interview with Beth and Mark is such a delight! They met in college on a blind date and have now been married for over 30 years! They decided to open their marriage about five years ago, but it wasn't a fast or easy process. During our conversation they take us inside their process in a really vulnerable way. They share openly about what they wish they had done different and how they worked together to heal and repair their relationship, and themselves, along the way. Today, they primarily spend their time exploring the swinging lifestyle, but as you will hear, life is a journey of exploring growth edges for these two. What it looked like five years ago is much different than today, and tomorrow is a new day full of possibilities. Mark is also a relationship coach who works with couples and individuals to help them explore what they need in their partnerships and to find their own path to opening up, if that's the path they choose. You can learn more about Mark and his work at www.openingus.com. Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Meshai and Fin team up together to answer amazing listener questions every fourth Friday of each month!   Today's questions are about advice for someone who's transitioning from only exploring non-monogamy within couple to exploring as a solo person after ending a partnership AND what do we do when our metamours aren't treating our partners the way we think they should be.   If YOU have a question, we'd love to hear it! Please, ask us anything by clicking here!   You likely know me (Fin) from over 300 episodes of Normalizing Non-Monogamy. Just in case you don't, I cohost the podcast with my partner Emma and we have been in an open relationship together for over 15 years. I am also working towards completing a sex and relationship coaching program through the Somatica Institute and will be finished in late spring 2024.   We are super excited to be partnering with Meshai for the Ask Us Anything episodes! She first appeared on the podcast on Episode 233 and we're honored to have her back!   Meshai is relationship coach with the team at Expansive Connection. She believes in the power of living as one’s authentic self, and the freedom that comes from changing perspectives. She loves putting the puzzle pieces of a couple's sexual energy together and aiding them in positive and explorative movement.   Her coaching work implements creative synergy, openness, self-expression, and the confrontation of challenges through self-determination. She helps individuals from diverse populations move forward with their goals while being fully aware that trauma can play on the whole person.   Meshai is a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT) and is certified in both Trauma Therapy and Sex Therapy, and she is trained in Dialectical Behavior Therapy.   Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Today's interview with Adam is best summarized as an unforgettable, powerful, and transformative adventure. He describes it better than we ever could on the website for his new book "Seek The Risk" and so, we got permission to adapt his description slightly: Adam has spent most of his life pursuing adventure—climbing some of the world’s steepest mountains, snowboarding dangerous backcountry terrain, and BASE jumping off of cliffs. Then he met Jane... Jane was a sex educator with a PhD in psychology, a female sexuality empowerment activist—and a self-described slut, who rejected monogamy and the societal norms of what a sexually well-behaved woman should be. No stranger to extreme living and taking risks, Adam thought he could handle whatever his relationship with Jane threw at him. But the very publicly open relationship was more than his strong male persona could bear. Rather than walk away and protect his ego, Adam applied the lessons he had learned about fear while free soloing high up on rock faces and free diving a hundred feet below the surface of the sea to navigate an even more terrifying situation—the woman he loved having lots of sex with lots of other men. Neither a celebration of non-monogamy, nor a cautionary tale, Seek the Risk is a firsthand account of what one extreme sports competitor went through after falling in love with the “wrong girl.” His journey forced him to reevaluate his ideals about relationships, female sexuality, and his own masculinity. It was also the wildest ride of his life. Enjoy! Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Tasha and David have been married for about five years and have been together for about a decade. They've had variations of an open relationship (primarily swinging) from the beginning and have done a lot of work to learn and grow together.   Tasha and David dive into how the 26 year age difference between them has impacted their relationship and how they view love and sex. David came out of a long-term monogamous marriage just before he met Tasha. For him, sex equals love. Or at least it used to. This wasn't exactly the case for Tasha.   Tasha and David are also in the middle of a beautiful and common transition in their non-monogamous partnership... They are exploring what opening up their partnership to connection beyond swinging and sex with others might look like. They have found themselves answering a very common question... What happens when swingers catch feelings?   Tasha is a Doctoral student who is studying relationship satisfaction across all relational dynamics. She would love if you would help her collect data to finish her thesis and dissertation. Here is a link to the confidential survey which takes about 10 minutes to complete. Thank you for helping her and for helping to normalize non-monogamy! (Note: Tasha is a pseudonym. The survey and her research is published under her legal name.)   Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Mariana is a wonderful 31 year old polyamorous woman in Portugal who is in a mono-poly dynamic with her partner of five years and an additional partner of about a year. Consensual non-monogamy is a relatively new concept in her life but she has been pushing back against societal norms and scripts since she was a teenager.   She shares with us her beautiful and powerful journey of hitting rock-bottom in an abusive partnership before digging deep into who she is and what she really wants out of life and relationships. She takes us through the work she did for herself and with her partner to design the relationship she wants... And, it's everchanging.   Speaking of designing relationships... Mariana is a designer and worked with her therapist to adapt the tools she used with her partner into a stunning game. You can find The Relationship Design Game here on her website and you can save 10% when you use the code "EMMA" at checkout!   Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Jessica and David have been in many different iterations of relationship together for over twenty years... They were friends, they dated, they were friends again, they dated again, they got married, they had a child, they divorced, they became friends again, and now they're nesting co-parents who refer to themselves as "poly intimates" and life partners. This interview is a beautiful and vulnerable look inside what that journey was like for them together and as individuals, and how they arrived here. And, where "here" even is.   Jessica Fern is the author of the wildly popular book Polysecure. From her website: Polysecure is both a trailblazing theoretical treatise and a practical guide. It provides nonmonogamous people with a new set of tools to navigate the complexities of multiple loving relationships and offers radical new concepts that are sure to influence the conversation about attachment theory.   She and David Cooley recently released their new book, Polywise. From her website: Using a grounded theory approach, they explore the underlying challenges that nonmonogamous individuals and partners can experience after their first steps, offering practical strategies for transforming them into opportunities for new levels of clarity and intimacy. Polywise provides both the conceptual framework to better understand the shift from monogamy to nonmonogamy and the tools to navigate the next steps.   To learn more about Jessica's work, please visit her website. Similarly, to learn more about David's work as a restorative justice facilitator, please visit his website.   Check out the full show notes here.   Submit a question for our Ask Us Anything Episodes! Click here to join our upcoming Virtual Meet and Greets! Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Check out our weekly peer support groups!   Skip the ads and sign up for the Premium Feed!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing