Normalizing Non-Monogamy - Interviews in Polyamory and Swinging

Courtney and Derek were both on the show separately over the past two weeks and today we're delighted to bring them on together to tell their very own love story! Both of their individual stories are incredible and we definitely recommend listening to them but you will NOT be lost today if you haven't already listened. Courtney and Derek's story stands on its own and it's a love story for the ages! Trigger warning... This is a sappy and mushy love story told in great detail and we're so here for it! It's also full of laughter and hilarious anecdotes! Courtney and Derek met online a few years ago and since then have fallen pretty madly in love. Today's interview is unique in that we get to hear what was going on for each of them as they began forming their partnership while the imperfect human-ness of life swirled around them. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Courtney just turned 50 and has been exploring polyamory and non-monogamy for the last three years or so... However, her story begins long before she and her husband of 16 years opened their relationship in 2022. Today, Courtney takes us all the way back to the first time she had simultaneous crushes at age four... Rocky and Superman! Today's interview with Courtney is full of laughter, joy, heartbreak, whirlwind relationships, self-discovery, and beautifully vulnerable and powerful stories of life and love. Join us! You won't regret it. And! If Courtney's story resonated for you and you're looking at real estate in the Asheville area, please reach out to her through her website! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

If you were thinking of skipping this one, consider rethinking that... Derek first learned about polyamory from one of the original writings on the subject in Green Egg Magazine back in 1990 (see link in show notes below)... He was in his early twenties and showed it to his college girlfriend and they sort of jumped right in! They explored non-monogamy together for a few years before parting ways and Derek found himself "scared back into monogamy" for many years. Fast-forward just a couple years and Derek gets married in 2015... When he met his wife, Kay, a few years prior he brought up the idea of non-monogamy but she wasn't interested. However, she brought the idea back to him in 2016 and they decided to open their relationship for about a year before starting a family. When their son was about three they decided to open up again and during the time they had closed their partnership Kay had come out to him as queer. Then, around 2021 Kay came out to Derek as a lesbian. Today, Derek and Kay are nesting co-parents and are rebuilding their friendship. Derek also has a girlfriend of about 18 months who lives nearby and describes himself as ambiamorous... Comfortable with both monogamy and non-monogamy. Join us today as Derek shares his incredibly powerful and beautiful story. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Marla has been exploring and practicing non-monogamy for about 20 years after learning about it during their first year of college. After getting out of their last monogamous relationship early in their college experience, Marla fell in love with their best friend and never really looked back. Like many of us, they were kind of making it up as they went and figuring it out along the way. Today we have a fantastic conversation with Marla about their journey, their struggles and triumphs, as well as the wisdom they've earned along the way. We dig into the reality of being an imperfect human, the importance of relationship repair, queer-platonic partnerships, and everyone's favorite topic... Hierarchy! More about Marla from their website: www.polyamarla.com Marla (they/them pronouns) is a relationship therapist and educator specializing in non-monogamy and *2SLGBTQIA+ identities. They have been practicing polyamory since 2005, and facilitating programs on the subject since 2009. (*2Spirit, Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, Transgender, Queer, Intersex, Asexual, and beyond) Like you, they are a fabulous and sometimes messy human being. As a member of so many of the communities they support, Marla takes accountability when they’ve made mistakes, and doesn’t shy away from challenging conversations. Their goal is to provide support and education for people who want to understand or practice non-monogamy. They advocate for the health of non-monogamous communities by offering services to people within, and adjacent to those communities. Please check out all of Marla's work on their website and don't forget to grab a copy of their brand new book Nonmonogamy and Defying a Paradigm! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Sarah is an elder Gen Z in her mid to late twenties who feels like she's always been polyamorous but didn't have the words for it. Like many, her initial dating experiences followed the model of serial monogamy, but for her it always felt terrible to "have to" end a decent relationship just because she met someone else she had feelings for. Not anymore! A few years ago she met her primary partner and they've been in an open relationship since the beginning. In this fantastic interview Sarah shares how she and her partner navigated the early days of being non-monogamous when neither of them had any experience or models of how to do it. We also have great conversations about how they handle hierarchy, how she navigates dating monogamous people since she lives in a place with few polyamorous folks, and how she keeps herself safe as she explores in ways that feel very natural for her. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Cooper and his wife are in their forties with three kids and have been married for over 17 years. While they only "officially" opened their relationship about three years ago it wasn't a completely foreign concept to them when they got together and they always had a mindset and understanding that there was more out there. Cooper's wife initially brought up the idea of opening their relationship when her libido started to wane during perimenopause but they quickly realized this was about way more than that... It was a doorway to a whole new set of possibilities and opportunities for them both! In this wonderful conversation Cooper shares with us how he and his wife navigate non-monogamy with slightly different styles and desires and how they handle hierarchy in their connections with others. He also digs into their experiences with supporting each other through breakups and how they manage all of this while raising a family, working. and living full lives. We love how Cooper and his wife approach their relationship and life with such an open and curious mindset - we hope you enjoy this interview as much as we do! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Dossie realized in her early twenties that sexuality was her path and that sexuality and feminism would be hand-in-hand in creating the changes she wanted to see in the world, and in herself. In 1969, when she was about 25, Dossie declared she'd never be monogamous again... And she never looked back! Dossie's story is full of love, laughter, joy, heartbreak, healing, determination, grit, and inspiration. In this incredibly moving and powerful conversation Dossie takes us through more than 60 years of trailblazing a path for herself that so many have since followed while discovering their authentic selves. We're honored to be able to share this beautiful interview with you today and hope it inspires you as much as it did us. You may recognize Dossie Easton as the co-author of The Ethical Slut and other books but of course she is so much more than just that... From her own website: "I am proud to serve my communities as psychotherapist, relationship counselor, educator, and author. Since 1969, I have lived and worked in sexual minority cultures. I am dedicated to feminist, polyamorous, BDSM, spiritual, gender-diverse, and LGBTQ individuals and communities. I explore, with my clients and in my own life, new paradigms of gender, sexuality, and relationships. I am committed to offering authentic, respectful, competent, and compassionate psychotherapy and relationship counseling to people exploring non-traditional lifestyles." Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Danielle and her husband have been married for over thirty years and have been exploring non-monogamy together for more than twenty of them. Danielle's husband initially brought up the idea but the concept felt intuitive for both of them so they started tiptoeing into it together. And of course, just because it felt intuitive doesn't mean that there weren't challenges and surprises along the way.  This interview with Danielle is really beautiful and vulnerable as she takes us all the way back to her childhood and then through thirty plus years of marriage, raising a family, building a business, and living the hell out of life. We have powerful conversations about confronting jealousy and how it can really sneak up and surprise you, coming out to their children, how she and her husband have different preferences and desires when it comes to connecting with others, and so much more! We hope you enjoy this lovely conversation as much as we did! Danielle began immersing herself in learning about sexuality, relationships, and pleasure from a relatively young age and never really stopped... Dr. Danielle Harel is a pioneering force in erotic embodiment and personal transformation. As co-creator of the Somatica® Method and co-founder of the Somatica Institute, she weaves deep academic expertise with heartfelt presence, empowering people to awaken their desires and embrace their fullest, most authentic selves. With a Ph.D. in Human Sexuality, and a Master’s in Clinical Social Work, Danielle brings both scholarly depth and intuitive wisdom to her work. She has co-authored three transformative books and served as lead sexologist and consulting producer on Virgin Island, a bold Channel 4 series exploring real, vulnerable, and healing erotic connection. Danielle’s approach is rooted in celebration and curiosity, inviting each person to reclaim pleasure as an essential part of human wholeness. You can learn more about Danielle and her work at somaticainstitute.com. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Jacob and his spouse have been in some form of an open relationship since they got together over 18 years ago. In fact, their relationship actually began as a triad. Today, Jacob takes us along his relationship journey as he and his partner traveled the country living all over and exploring connections and partnerships in their own unique ways. Jacob is an infant care specialist and an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) who helps families of all kinds with their lactation needs. He specializes in helping non-gestational parents who want to induce lactation as well as queer, trans, and non-binary parents who have given birth and need support with lactation. Jacob also recently released his first book "Lactation for the Rest of Us - A Guide for Queer and Trans Parents and Helpers." Please check out all of Jacob's work and grab a copy of his book over on his website. Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing

Kels first began experimenting with non-monogamy in her mid-twenties when she and her partner agreed that they could both experiment and play with others while traveling. Since then, Kels has explored a variety of different relationship styles and dynamics as she continues to figure out what's best for her. One of the things we absolutely love about Kels' story is how she approaches life and relationships with kindness, curiosity, and a sense of adventure to what's possible when you open yourself up to the potential of connection with others. Kels is also the co-founder of Squirm! A bit more about Kels straight from Squirm's website: Kels is a producer, businesswoman, and sex and relationship enthusiast. She never underestimates the power of a good story or a good spreadsheet. In tandem with a career in project management and marketing, she has been writing, directing, producing and performing for film and theater since 2013. Kels believes the core of a good business, production, or sexual experience is the same: being attuned to other people and aware of their sweet spots. She’s committed to restoring education to its natural state — enticing. Check out getsquirmy.com for more information about their game, events, and the Porn Nerds podcast! Check out the full show notes here. Join the most amazing community of open-minded humans on the planet!   Click here to order your very own NNM shirt! $10 Off - Online STI Testing