What We Really Want: Conversations About Connection

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"Go to whatwereallywant.show and follow us on your favorite podcast platform, to make sure you don't miss out on a single episode, including... We're excited to welcome our first RETURNING guest on the show. DREW BOA is a good friend, and someone committed to helping struggling men outgrow their need for and pursuit of pornography. Drew is the founder of Husband Material, an online community where men can find friends, coaching, and resources to support them in their path to living as mature, healthy men.Drew released a book, Outgrow Porn: Find Lasting Freedom Without Fighting an Exhausting Battle, on August 25th. It's a book that therapist and author Michael John Cusick calls "...a paradigm-shifting resource that leads men from battling against the beast of porn to the pursuit of growing up into wholeness of heart."Episode 45 | Drew Boa: How We Outgrow Porn will be available Tuesday, September 2nd!#drewboa #husbandmaterial #outgrowporn #purityculture #pornography #pornaddiction #sexaddiction #healing #recovery #grace #gospel #transformationSupport the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"When couples in conflict feel a million miles apart, are they? Are the areas of "stuckness" as insurmountable as it sometimes feels?KELLY BOURQUE, is a therapist who specializes in Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), a modality of counseling that focuses on attachment science and how it shows up in romantic relationships. Kelly is the founder of Red Therapy Group in Franklin TN. EFT is a modality based in attachment theory, and is helpful in allowing couples to identify unhealthy patterns in their relationships. Patterns such as the "push/pull" or "pursuer/withdrawer" dynamic, or with anxious/avoidant attachment styles.Kelly talks about how EFT has been invaluable in helping couples see that despite the surface conflict, they usually desire the same things. It can help them get out of old, unhelpful cycles and find their way back to each other more healthily and authentically.#kellybourque #redtherapygroup #emotionallyfocusedtherapy #efttherapy #efct #efit #suejohnson #holdmetight #createdforconnection #addiction #recovery #grace #gospel #transformationFree consultation for 3-day intensives in Franklin, TN. Click hereRed Therapy Group website (traditional therapy for TN residents)Kelly's book I Have Feelings About ThisKelly's video series for betrayal trauma recoveryFind an EFT therapist (https://iceeft.com/) Support the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"People walking through the wilderness of addiction can have a hard time finding places that feel truly safe to open up. Yet authentic connection is the key to freedom from addiction. One of the things that gives the safety people seek is a person who chooses to be open about their own "limp," not hiding from their personal failures. John Steakley is that kind of person. Since walking through his own addictive struggle with alcohol, John has been using that experience to help hundreds of others find hope as they seek to walk out of that same wilderness. John is the founder and Executive Director of Unbound Grace Ministries, a support & counseling ministry helping people who have found themselves trapped in unhealthy relationships with alcohol and other substances.  John talks about the importance of providing safe healing space by how we are vulnerable with our own struggles (pointing to our limp). Pointing to our own limp also helps us and others remember that it's not about us or what we can do... our limp also points to God, the "Power greater than ourselves," who desires to restore us to the lives we were meant to live. John has written a book, also titled Unbound Grace. He lives in Birmingham AL with his family.#johnsteakley #unboundgrace #addiction #recovery #grace #gospel #transformation #healing #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #connection #conversationUnbound Grace ministry websiteUnbound Grace book (on Amazon) Support the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"For people in the Birmingham AL area, or who are part of the PCA denomination, BOB FLAYHART is probably a name you've heard. In 1989 Bob was the founding pastor of Oak Mountain Presbyterian Church, and served as lead pastor there until 2024. Bob has remained a consistent advocate for the pure message of God's unconditional love, grace, and transforming power through the gospel. Both Greg and Bobby benefitted from Bob's (and OMPC's) openness to provide a welcoming space for recovering people to meet for support. In our conversation we talk about how obvious it is that pastors should be open to supporting people in recovery, and why for some ministry leaders it doesn't seem so obvious.We also talk about a concept he's been preaching for years, called "The Gospel Waltz," and how understanding it can help Christian believers who struggle to recover from addiction.#bobflayhart #gospelwaltz #grace #gospel #transformation #oakmountainpresbyterianchurch #ompc #healing #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversationThe Gospel Waltz book (on Amazon) Support the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"When Stacey and I talked with Corinne Vance for Episode 41, we started recording early and the conversation got really interesting really quickly (at least for us). We got to know a lot about Corinne: how she came to faith, her early experiences with Christianity, and how that has impacted her as a therapist.We thought you might enjoy a little extra helping of our talk with Corinne, so here it is! Please keep listening in...we'll be giving you new conversations every other Tuesday. Also, please support us by writing  a positive review and giving us 5 stars where you get your podcasts.#corinnevance #traumatherapy #sexualtrauma #sexualabuse #therapy #spiritualhealing #counseling #healing #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversationCorinne's counseling websiteSupport the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"There are certain experiences that are excruciatingly hard to talk about, and from which healing is incredibly difficult. Sexual abuse is far more common than most people realize, yet survivors often feel isolated and carry shame over their abuse. They need kind, caring people to support their healing.Corinne Vance is that kind of person. She has worked therapeutically with men, women, and adolescents for over 20 years. She has provided training and consultation (globally and in the U.S.) in the areas of aftercare for survivors of sex trafficking and domestic violence. She recently served as Director of Trauma Therapy at The WellHouse, a safe haven for victims of human trafficking in Alabama, and continues to provide clinical supervision for staff there.Corinne describes sexual trauma as something "that affects every family." In our conversation we unpack some of the intricacies of sexual trauma & abuse, talk about its impact on all relationships, and discuss how wrestling with God is a good thing.#corinnevance #traumatherapy #sexualtrauma #sexualabuse #therapy #spiritualhealing #counseling #healing #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversationCorinne's counseling websiteAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"What do you do when your spouse tells you she wants a divorce and is in love with another man?That was a question Harrison Scott Key never thought he'd have to answer. But it's exactly what happened. Over the course of several years he navigated an excruciating saga of fighting for his marriage and for his sanity. He tells the story in his New York Times bestselling book How to Stay Married: The Most Insane Love Story Ever Told.In our conversation with Harrison, we talked about what it was like living it, writing about it, and the unexpected impact of book tour promotion about such a personal experience. We talked about family healing, and how his friends and his church helped him find the capacity for forgiveness.It's a rare talent who can take such a heartbreaking story and also make it so funny; but that's exactly what Harrison does - in the book and in our conversation. Harrison is a professor at Savannah College of Art & Design, has written three books, and lives in Savannah with his wife Lauren and their kids. (He's also the drummer in a cover band called The Love Handles.)#harrisonscottkey #howtostaymarried #marriage #infidelity #reconciliation #spiritualhealing #counseling #therapy #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversationHarrison's websiteHarrison's books on AmazonHarrison's TEDx Savannah talk on YouTubeSupport the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"During his years as a church worship pastor, Greg was heavily influenced by today's guest Todd Fields. As a worship leader associated with 7:22, a weekly worship gathering started in 1995 by Louie Giglio at Northpoint Community Church in Atlanta, and as someone who has written and led worship music and produced multiple recordings over the years, Todd is a skilled musician who knows what he's talking about with corporate worship.More importantly, though, Todd knows how critical it is for worship leaders to be spiritually and emotionally healthy; and how often this is not the case. Often seen and valued primarily for their skill and what they can produce, it's common for people in these positions to experience brokenness and burnout.In 2014, Todd and his wife Carrie felt God was calling them to pay closer attention to their own hearts and souls, and this calling birthed a new ministry called Worship Circle. This is a community offering small group and one-on-one connection between worship leaders/pastors and small group leaders; participants receive love, care, and investment in who they are as people, not just for what they can do as musicians. Todd's heart for Worship Circle is so consistent with our heart for Awaken, it was a joy for like-minded (and like-hearted) people to get to have a conversation about this passion. We hope it will encourage you to care for your heart and soul, and to remember that you're loved and not alone!#toddfields #worshipcircle #soulcare #emotionalhealing #spiritualhealing #counseling #therapy #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversationWorship Circle websiteTodd's music (on Spotify) (on Apple Music) Support the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"When situations in life activate our emotions, it can be easy to stay on the surface, focusing on what's going on and how we can "fix it." But often, the parts of us being activated aren't above the surface. We have to go deeper. In this episode, Dr. Eddie Capparucci talks about how his Inner Child Model of therapy can give great understanding about how we process difficult and traumatic situations. Eddie is the author of several books, including Going Deeper: How the Inner Child Affects Your Sexual Addiction. Many people in recovery from problematic unwanted or addictive sexual behavior have found that early life experiences affect how they show up in the present. Identifying what type(s) of wounded "inner children" are activated can inform a helpful and compassionate path to healing.Eddie and his wife Teri have a therapy practice in Texas, and have co-authored the book Going Deeper for Betrayed Partners.#eddiecapparucci #abundantlifecounseling #innerchildmodel #innerchildtherapy #goingdeeper #counseling #therapy #childhoodtrauma #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversationEddie's books on AmazonEddie's website Support the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)

"Send us a message! (questions, feedback, etc.)"Raising kids in a way that nurtures them and sets them up for a healthy life is SO difficult. Most parents deeply desire to provide for their kids in the best ways they can. But often they feel like they're showing up with a deficit, not having received nurture, care, and attention from their parents to the extent they needed it.Our guest, David Thomas, has been helping parents, kids, and families navigate through these types of life struggles for decades. As co-founder and Executive Director of Daystar Counseling Ministries in Nashville TN, David is dedicated to providing support, encouragement & compassion to children, adolescents & families in need through counseling.David is also the author of several books, including Raising Emotionally Strong Boys: Tools Your Son Can Build On for Life. He and his partner at Daystar Sissy Goff host the incredibly popular and helpful podcast Raising Boys and Girls, which has helped thousands of parents engage more lovingly and confidently with their kids. David and Sissy have just released a series of children's books, called The Daystar Dogs, which help parents navigate complicated emotions with their kids.#davidthomas #daystarcounselingministries #sissygoff #raisingboysandgirls #daystardogs #counseling #therapy #families #parenting #childhoodtrauma #adolescenttrauma #gospel #grace #awaken #awakenrecovery #awakenpodcast #whatwereallywant #wwrw #recovery #connection #conversationDaystar Counseling Ministries websiteDavid's books (Amazon)NEW Daystar Dogs children's books (Amazon)Raising Boys and Girls podcast Support the showAwaken websiteRoots Retreat Men's IntensiveRoots Retreat Women's WorkshopAwaken Men & Women's support meeting info (including virtual)