Come Back Podcast

"God has been miraculous. And the best thing that ever happened is I learned that I love Jesus Christ. I love what he does for us. I know he is real and I know that he loves me, which I never knew that before. I was just going through those experiences to have to tell the story here, and there's just so much more about being a gay man and navigating through the church."Come Back TeamDirector, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneOutreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaProduction Director: Trent WardwellEpisode sponsor: Serve Clothing⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠https://serveclothing.com/?gad_source=1⁠

Jillian Deaton, a professional ASL interpreter renowned for her work alongside artists like Taylor Swift, shares her deeply personal journey of faith and doubt. She candidly discusses the emotional turmoil she faced in 2020, grappling with her beliefs while navigating racial and LGBTQ+ issues within the church. Jillian highlights the immense value of community support during crises, revealing how such connections can spark transformation and resilience in the face of adversity.

 "I went home and I was like, I need to change. Like I need to change! I knew it was gonna be hard. I had to change everything. So I'm like, okay, I'm gonna go to church every Sunday. That is what I'm gonna start with. I don't care if I listen. I don't care if I wanna be there, but I'm starting with that because that's something I can do. I'll go to church every Sunday. I started with that."Come Back TeamDirector, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneOutreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaEpisode sponsor: Serve Clothing⁠⁠⁠⁠https://serveclothing.com/?gad_source=1

"I think that's the big thing is I had been to the temple once, right when I got outta prison. But I didn't feel like I was doing it for myself. I felt like I was doing it for the people around me and I didn't get to really enjoy it. And of course, your first time in the temple, you're looking everywhere. You're like, what does this mean? What does this mean? But now that I came back to this church and I went back for the first time in February, it's for me, it's for no one else. It's for me. When you do it for yourself, it feels so much better."Come Back TeamDirector, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneProducer:Outreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaEpisode sponsor: Serve Clothing⁠⁠⁠https://serveclothing.com/?gad_source=1

CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains sensitive content that may be triggering or offensive to some audiences. Parental discretion is advised." Reading the Book of Mormon that week, I really sat down and actually studied the words of the Book of Mormon, and it was powerful. It was so powerful. It was undeniable. And I had been reading about how this genius farmer, right, we always were like, 'He's such a genius. That's how you get away with it', wrote this book out of nowhere. And as I'm reading it, I'm just like, there is no way. There is no way. I remember so many scriptures, I couldn't get enough because there were so many things, and it just felt like God was just waiting for me to open the door and he would just feed me, you know, like I was starving and he would just feed me."Come Back TeamDirector, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneProducer: Lauren RoseOutreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaEpisode sponsor: Brick House Recovery

" And I see that in Thomas B. Marsh's words, where he says 'The Savior loved me, but he loved me enough to whoop me.' Basically, to put me in circumstances where I realized that I needed to come back and that I was missing something from my life."Come Back TeamDirector, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneProducer: Trent WardwellOutreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaEpisode sponsor: Serve Clothing⁠⁠⁠https://serveclothing.com/?gad_source=1

Come Back TeamDirector, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneProducer: Lauren RoseOutreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaEpisode sponsor: Serve Clothing⁠⁠⁠https://serveclothing.com/?gad_source=1

CONTENT WARNING: This episode contains sensitive content that may be triggering or offensive to some audiences. Parental discretion is advised."We can go through hard things. We can be the most horrible or the worst human. Christ still loves us and He still waits patiently for us to come back. It's been awesome going to the temple. It's been amazing! I ended up recently speaking at stake conference because addiction is rampant. I don't know any household that isn't either being touched by it in one way or another. It's either somebody in their family or something. And I feel, almost a duty, if you will, to want to try and help. I want to help people see it differently. I'm an ex-convict. I'm a felon, you know, but those words typically have a negative connotation, right? They stand for something negative. And I think we need to teach our kids or even just within the church that you know what? Good people can also struggle."Come Back Team:Director, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneProducer: Lauren RoseOutreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaEpisode sponsor: Serve Clothing⁠⁠⁠https://serveclothing.com/?gad_source=1

"So here I am just one after another. I was smart enough to recognize Satan should have been a little more subtle because this was way too obvious. It was clear that I was under attack and especially that my husband had just been called to be Bishop. I'm like, okay. So I had enough wisdom to step back and recognize that. It still didn't take away from the fact that I cried myself to sleep every night. I didn't know the answers to all this information that I had been overwhelmed with. And my husband could answer some of it, but not all of it. He was a new bishop and I just didn't know what to do. For the first time, my faith was really shaken."Come Back Team:Director, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneProducer: Lauren RoseOutreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaEpisode Sponsor: Brick House Recovery https://brickhouserecovery.com/

"I am so glad that I've been on both ends because to feel what it actually feels like is really cool. So many times I'd be like, 'what if I wouldn't have come back? I wouldn't have had this experience. And I wouldn't be able to associate with these people in the way that I have been.' And every time I was just so thankful that there was a desire in me that never gave up looking for Jesus. And that other people listened to the Spirit and came and found me, you know? All the time I'm like, thank you for letting me come back. I'm so glad I'm back."Come Back Team:Director, Founder & Host: Ashly StoneProducer: Lauren RoseOutreach Manager: Jenna CarlsonEditor: Cara ReedAssistant Editor: Michelle BergerArt Director: Jeremy GarciaEpisode sponsor: Serve Clothing⁠⁠⁠https://serveclothing.com/?gad_source=1⁠⁠https://mikesautoshack.com/⁠⁠⁠⁠