Beautifully Complex

Did you know that meltdowns are different from tantrums? While a tantrum can devolve into a meltdown, a meltdown is very different. A child is not in control of themselves during a meltdown. Their brain has sort of been hijacked. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, my partner in the Behavior Revolution, Sarah Wayland, Ph.D., and I take a deep dive on meltdowns. We’re talking about what a meltdown is and how it’s different from a tantrum, and we’re outlining the five steps you need to take when your child is having a meltdown — and some of these steps may surprise you. If you want to reduce the intensity and duration of meltdowns, and help your child when they’re having a hard time, this episode is a must-listen. Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

The autonomic nervous system governs the majority of our responses and reactions because behavior is biological. Fight, flight and freeze are all states of the autonomic nervous system, and all states of dysregulation. Calm and connected is also a state of the autonomic nervous system, when an individual is regulated. When you understand these connections to regulation and behavior, you have the foundational information necessary to understand behavior, notice, get curious, and create some transformation. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, nervous system expert Irene Lyon teaches us about trauma, the autonomic nervous system, unresolved survival stress, and how those experiences and biology come together to shape behavior.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

An ADHD diagnosis can come with a lot of emotions, especially shame. So many kids and adults feel ashamed of their ADHD and lack confidence to be their true selves as a result. In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, ADHD Adult and Executive Function Coach, Mallory Band shares her story of growing up with ADHD, accepting her brain and its differences, and learning to live authentically. Mallory has tips for parents on how to help your kids gain the confidence it takes to live as their true selves too.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

It has always been tough to be a teenager, which has been exacerbated by the COVID pandemic and schooling at home for long periods. Teens are struggling more with their mental health than ever, which means they need more support and guidance in this area than ever. But teens aren’t always open to talking with their parents about the hard stuff, or talking to anyone about it.  In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, Natalie Borrell & Alison Grant of Life Success for Teens share the stress and anxiety they are seeing today in their school and among their clients. They also offer tips and strategies to help teens who are struggling.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

Emotional intelligence is a learned skill set. We must teach our kids about feelings — what they are and what they mean — as well as how to manage them and communicate them to others. In her work with children and her emotional toolkit, Nadine Levitt teaches that emotions are trying to help us. They’re messengers. Some emotions are more challenging to feel but they’re all natural and necessary. It’s our job to figure out what the message means and what to do about it. Tune in to this episode to learn how to talk to your kids about their emotions and teach them the skills necessary to navigate their feelings in productive and healthy ways.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

American culture implies that if you are in control of your child’s behavior, you are a “good parent.” But that is extremely flawed logic. Our job as parents is to guide our kids to create a life of joy, fulfillment, and success for themselves. It’s not to have little people that we control. It’s not to have someone to exert authority over. How would that benefit our kids? How would that benefit us?    So we have to relinquish some control to our kids to teach them independence and set them up for success. But we also have to relinquish control to our kids for the benefit of their confidence and sense of competence. Kids can’t do well if we don’t allow them to make their own choices and take charge of themselves (and they can’t develop those skills either). Join me as I talk about the benefits of relinquishing control to our kids, and the importance of accepting what we cannot control and focusing our energy instead on what we can influence.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

Scientific research shows us that affirmations are a powerful tool to combat negative limiting beliefs and reshape our neural pathways in the brain for the positive. Kids with ADHD (and/or autism) get exponentially more negative messages throughout their days which has a damaging impact on their confidence, sense of competency, and self-esteem. They need tools and strategies like affirmations to counterbalance the negative input and self-beliefs that commonly impact them.  In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, I’m joined by the co-founder of Self-Pause, Jaeden Schafer, to discuss what effective affirmation practice looks like and why it’s so beneficial to adults and kids alike. Listen in to learn how you can support your child and their self-confidence with affirmations.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

We don’t naturally think about how much of our parenting is actually about our kids and their needs, and how much of it is actually about ourselves. Yet, it’s crucial that we do build an awareness around when our own experiences, challenges, fears, and traumas are getting in the way of seeing our kids’ needs clearly and providing for their needs. More often than not, our reactions and responses are more about us than about our kids.  In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, I’m talking about how to determine what is about your child and what is more about you, and how to use that information to be adequately focused on your child’s struggles to be a better parent. One strategy is to ask yourself, “What does my reaction say about me?” We cover more insights and strategies in the show, as well.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

Gender diversity is more common among neurodiverse kids and teens, especially those on the autism spectrum. People who do not identify with the sex they were assigned at birth are three to six times as likely to have autism as people who don’t question their gender assignment, according to the latest studies on the subject. Neurodivergent kids have trouble fitting in and they often explore different communities to discover where they fit, including the transgender community.  In this episode of the Parenting ADHD Podcast, I have an open and honest conversation with transgender woman, Wynne Nowland, about how parents, friends, and families can support a child or teen who is questioning their assigned gender or has reached the realization that they are transgender. One of the most important aspects is getting mental health experts involved to help you and your child navigate gender exploration and gender identity. A humanistic approach is key to a healthy journey. This episode is for every human! It’s time to open our hearts and minds to accept every single person as their authentic selves.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.

We’re working on our next free online Parenting ADHD & Autism Summit — Decoding Behavior Summit February 11-13, 2022. In interviewing all these experts on behavior, parenting, ADHD, autism, and anxiety we have had our own lightbulb moments.  In this episode of the podcast, we’re sharing some of what these experts will be offering during the Decoding Behavior Summit and letting you know how you can participate in this online conference for free.Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/beautifully-complex--6137613/support.