Writing Your Resilience: Building Resilience, Embracing Trauma and Healing Through Writing

Send us a textJoin me and Debbie Weiss, author of the memoir Available As Is,  as we discuss how multiple major losses impact the way we see ourselves and the world, the challenges of dating when you’re over fifty, and the most important thing new writers should consider when starting a book. Debbie’s Bio: Debbie Weiss is the author of the award-winning memoir “Available As Is: A Midlife Widow’s Search for Love” about creating a new life after the loss of her husband and high school sweetheart of 32 years. Her writing has been featured in The New York Times’ “Modern Love” column and the Huffington Post among other publications. A former lawyer, she’s proudest of earning her MFA in creative writing at Saint Mary’s College of California in 2020 at age 56. She currently lives in Benicia, California where she can be found practicing yoga, hiking, and extolling the virtues of cheese.Resources Mentioned During This Episode:First Try the Pastrami, Then the Polyamory by Debbie WeissWhen My Partner Of 32 Years Died, I Thought My Life Was Over. Here's How I Overcame My Grief. by Debbie WeissAnn Garvin’s Tweet Thread: https://x.com/AnnGarvin_/status/1776564808482959499 Episode Highlights2:00 Tackling a Story of Layered Grief7:58 Finding Your Story's Essential Question12:00 The Challenges of Dating Over 5018:47 Getting What We Deserve  25:07 Publishing a Modern Love29:47 Tempering Your Expectations34:20 Debbie’s Best Writing AdviceConnect with Debbie: https://debbieweissauthor.com/https://www.facebook.com/debbie.hansen.9https://www.instagram.com/debbie_weiss_author/https://substack.com/@debbieweissSign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textWhat would you do if an experience you’d long dreamed of was not only not what it’s cracked up to be, but at times miserable? Would you own up to the challenges or pretend it’s as great as you imagined  Join me and Megan Williams, author of One Bad Mother as we explore the challenges of being vulnerable on the page, the realities of modern motherhood no one wants to talk about, and a key book-launch lesson every author needs to know. Resources Mentioned During This Episode: Mom Rage by Minna DubinOrdinary Insanity by Sarah MenkendrickEpisode Highlights2:00 The Challenge of Being Vulnerable on the Page6:00 Protecting Yourself from Friendly Fire8:30 Structuring Around a Theme15:33 The Challenges of Modern Motherhood23:39 Book Launch Tips26:00 Megan’s Writing TipMegan’s Bio: Megan Williams is the author of One Bad Mother: A Woman’s Search for Meaning in Motherhood and the Police Academy. After graduating from Haverford College, Megan received her Ph.D. in English from Temple University and taught at Lafayette College and Santa Clara University. She has moved across the country—never landing in the middle—three times in twenty years. She now lives in the Pacific Northwest with her husband, who runs Blue Dog Bakery and keeps their teenage twins, rescued cat, horse, and mastiffs full of treats.Connect with Megan: Website: meganwilliamsauthor.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1347114175&mibextid=ZbWKwLInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/ottoiskingLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/megan-williams-6585844a/TikTok: @OnebadmotherOne Bad Mother: A Mother's Search for Meaning in the Police Academy a book by Megan Williams (bookshop.org)Sign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textIf you have a complicated relationship with someone, how do you write about them? Should you craft a linear memoir that reads more like a journey or write something that mirrors your experience? Join me and Lara Lillibridge, author of Girlish, Mama, Mama, Only Mama, and The Truth of Unringing Phones, as we explore the impact of estrangement on the memoir writing process, how to protect your heart as you write about painful experiences, the power of publishing your story, as well as the a-ha Lara had about which part of the writing process actually heals you.Lara’s Bio: Lara Lillibridge (she/they) is the author of The Truth About Unringing Phones: Essays on Yearning; Mama, Mama, Only Mama: An Irreverent Guide for the Newly Single Parent, and Girlish: Growing Up in a Lesbian Home,. Lara is a Creative Nonfiction Editor for HeartWood Literary Magazine. She holds an MFA from West Virginia Wesleyan College and is a mentor for AWP’s Writer to Writer.In this episode: When can non-linear storytelling play a role in writing about fragmented relationships?Advice for balancing dark and light moments in memoir writing to present a full picture of the relationship.The importance of audience connection and feedback as a source of resilience during the book launch period.The healing power of revision.Tips for organizing and structuring non-linear memoirs.Resources Mentioned During This Episode:The True Meaning of Success with Courtney MaumWhere Rivers Part: A Story of My Mother’s Life by Kao Kalia YangNew York Times article on Consent by Jill CimentEpisode Highlights1:00 COVID’s Impact on Our Creativity3:15 Structuring an Estrangement Story8:45 Crafting a Nonlinear Memoir15:00 Protecting Your Heart as You WriteHow Estrangement Impacts Us24:00 The Healing Power of Publishing Your Story30:23 Lara’s Best Writing AdviceConnect with LaraWebsite: http://laralillibridge.com/Twitter: https://x.com/Only_MamaFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/lara.lillibridgeInstagram/Threads: https://www.instagram.com/LaraLillibridgeSign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textWriting can be a powerful tool for healing, but when writing the tough stuff, it’s easy to get triggered and relive the experiences you’re writing about. If you’re wondering what to do about this, join me and somatic experiencing practitioner Kirby Moore as we explore how the nervous system works and how to care for it and your writing life. Plus Kirby will teach you a powerful tool you can use right now to calm your nervous system. While you can listen to this on any platform, if you’re a visual learner, this is a great episode to watch on YouTube. Now, let’s get to my conversation with Kirby Moore.Kirby’s bio: Kirby brings a unique and potent blend of modalities to his healing facilitation sessions. He has been very fortunate to study with some masterful SE faculty members, with Tibetan Buddhist heart teachers, and one of the pioneers in the field of Birth Process Work. All this training, plus 20 years as a practicing Astrologer, means that Kirby offers exceptional somatic process work – both in-person and online.In 2019, Kirby developed Trauma Informed Astrology, which is a very ambitious blend of Western Astrology, nervous system repair and theory, and embodiment tools. He loves offering courses, mentoring students, and offering clients rare insights into their process.Resources Mentioned During This Episode:Kirby’s Course: Liberating the Space ElementUse the Code Podcast30 to save 30% off this courseSouls of the Feet MeditationHeart Coherence MeditationDr. Kay Tye: The Biology of Social Interactions and EmotionsEpisode Highlights2:00 Biodynamic Cranial Sacral Therapy4:00 What is Somatic Experiencing8:00 Healthy and Unhealthy Checking Out12:00 The Consequences of Dissociation15:00 Reciprocals: A Powerful Somatic Tool26:00 Why Meditation Can Harm Trauma Survivors30:00 Dealing with Writing Triggers38:00 Somatic Advice on WritingConnect with KirbyWebsite: www.traumainformedastrology.comWebsite: www.mkirbymoore.comWebsite: https://astrodharma.meInstagram: @traumainformedastrologyEmail: kirby@mkirbymoore.comSign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textLike it or not, our family history shapes who we are. What if lost portions of your history are holding you back? What lengths would you go to recover this history, understand it, and then turn your discoveries into a memoir? Join me and author of the memoir Starry Field, Margaret Juhae Lee, as we explore the impacts of intergenerational trauma on our identity, the challenges of writing a researched memoir, staying motivated over the long haul, and the problem of getting an agent too soon.Margaret’s Bio: Margaret Juhae Lee is an Oakland-based writer and a former literary editor of The Nation magazine. She has been the recipient of a Bunting Fellowship from Harvard University and a Korean Studies Fellowship from the Korean Foundation. She is also a Tin House alum and has been awarded residencies at the Mesa Refuge, Anderson Center, and Mineral School. In 2020, she was named “Person of the Year” by the Sangcheol Cultural Welfare Foundation in Kongju, South Korea, for her work in honoring her grandfather, Patriot Lee Chul Ha. Her articles, reviews, and interviews have been published in The Nation, Newsday, Elle, ARTnews, The Advocate, The Rumpus and Writer's Digest.In this episode: How to navigate the challenges of writing a memoir that spans multiple generations and historical events.The importance of structure in memoir writing and how to achieve it.The emotional impact of sharing family stories and intergenerational trauma.Practical advice for balancing journalism and narrative memoir writing.Resources Mentioned During This Episode:Starry Field with Margaret Juhae Lee and Grace M. Cho Interview for the Korea SocietyEpisode Highlights4:00 Why Explore the Past?7:00 The Impact of Intergenerational Trauma9:00 The Role of Stories in Identity Formation15:00 Maintaining Your Momentum Over the Long Haul20:00 Getting an Agent Too Soon22:00 Structuring a Researched Memoir26:00 The Miracle of the Memoir Process29:00 Turning Yourself into a Character35:00 Understanding Situation versus StoryConnect with Margaret: Website: www.margaretjuhaelee.comInstagram: @mjuhaeTwitter: @margaretjuhaeLinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/margaret-juhae-lee-2b95905/Sign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textWhat does it take to become a professional writer with a published book? More importantly, what does it take to become a happy writer? Join multi-genre writer and book coach Courtney Maum and me as we discuss writer mental health, the key ingredients in an author brand, what success really means and how you can achieve it, as well as the number one skill all authors need to cultivate.  Courtney’s Bio: Courtney is the author of five books, including the groundbreaking publishing guide that Vanity Fair recently named one of the ten best books for writers, BEFORE AND AFTER THE BOOK DEAL and the memoir THE YEAR OF THE HORSES, chosen by The Today Show as the best read for mental health awareness. A writing coach, director of the writing workshop “Turning Points,” and educator, Courtney's mission is to help people hold on to the joy of art-making in a culture obsessed with turning artists into brands. Passionate about literary citizenship, Courtney sits on the advisory councils of The Authors Guild and The Rumpus and runs a bestselling Substack on publishing conundrums. You can sign up for her weekly newsletter and online masterclasses at CourtneyMaum.comIn this episode: 3:00 The Importance of Protecting Your Mental Health6:45 The True Measure of Success15:00 Understanding Your Yeses and Nos19:50 Building Brand Assets for Your Author Platform28:50 Navigating the Realities of the Publishing Industry42:00 The Impact of Health Challenges on Our Identity60:00 Having Faith in YourselfResources Mentioned During This Episode: Making Art Inside Delicious Darkness Last Night an ENT Saved My LifeExploring the Loneliness Epidemic with Athena DixonHow to Stop Gaslighting Yourself with Ingrid ClaytonOfficial TranscriptConnect with Courtney: Website: courtneymaum.comSubstack:https://substack.com/@courtneymaumInstagram: @cbmaumSign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textHave you ever worked on a tough story only to hear a voice in your head say maybe you’re not good enough, or maybe this isn't the project for you? How do you know if it’s self-sabotage or a wise part of you that’s trying to get your attention? Join professional writer Donna Moriarty and me as we discuss these voices and how to tell the difference between sabotage and support—especially when one voice is telling you to slow down or stop.  Resources Mentioned in This EpisodeGrampy’s Coat by Donna MoriartyNot Just Words: How a Good Apology Makes You Braver, Bolder, and Better at LifeDear Especially After Breaking: What If You Decide with the Full Force of Your Own Formidable Wisdom by Jeannine Ouellette How Recovery Supports Memoir Writing and Book Marketing Tips with Laura Cathcart RobbinsHow to Stop Gaslighting Yourself with Ingrid Clayton, Ph.DEpisode Highlights2:50 The Impact of Scene Writing on the Brain3:35 The Voices Writers Wrestle With10:30 Why Marketing Memoir is Hard  13:27 The Publication Fallacy Writers Buy Into16:25 The Problem with Staying Small19:00 Protecting the Magic of Your Most Precious Stories23:42 Donna’s Best Writing AdviceDonna’s bio: Donna Moriarty is a lifelong writer and editor. Her work has been featured in The New York Times, The Keepthings, Ms., San Francisco, and others. She’s the author of Not Just Words: How a Good Apology Makes You Braver, Bolder, and Better at Life. Donna is currently working on a memoir. She and her husband live in Ossining, N.Y., where they raised three wonderful children and a succession of dachshunds.Connect with Donna: Website: www.donnamoriarty.comWriting Website: www.silversmithwriting.comInstagram: @image.and.likeness Email: donna@silversmithwriting.comSign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textTW: Mention of Sexual AssaultIn this episode, you’ll hear from Deborah Svec-Carstens, a writer working on a memoir that details her journey of healing after trauma.In this episode:Writing about trauma and recounting hard memories.Three reasons why we struggle to write about feelings The impact trauma has on our memories and emotions Writing speculative scenes Writing around your toughest experiences The benefit of studying other writers ResourcesAtlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience by Brené BrownHunger by Roxanne GayAcetylene Torch Songs: Writing True Stories to Ignite the Soul by Sue William SilvermanAfter the Eclipse by Sarah PerryMy Interview with Sarah PerryA Hard Silence by Melanie BrooksMy Interview with Melanie BrooksPlaying with Dynamite by Sharon HarriganDeborah’s Bio: Deborah Svec-Carstens is a writer, spiritual director, and “recovering” lawyer who has written a memoir about her search for healing after a stranger sexually assaulted her in Paris. Her writing has appeared in the Des Moines Register and has been named a finalist in essay contests. In February 2024, she appeared before more than 1,200 people as part of The Des Moines Storytellers Project and told her story of creating community in the aftermath of rape. Deborah lives in West Des Moines, Iowa. She enjoys reading (especially at the beach), hiking, and singing soprano in a local community choir.Connect with DeborahWebsite: https://www.deborahsveccarstens.comFacebook: https://www.facebook.com/deborah.sveccarstensInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/deborah.sveccarstens/Sign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textThis week, you'll hear from Laila Rall, a writer working on a memoir about her chaotic, bicultural childhood with an unstable mother. We will explore two of the biggest challenges writers of coming-of-age memories grapple with: when does my story really begin and how do I gracefully insert my wisdom into scenes that involve very young narrators?Episode Highlights2:25 Exploring the Scope of Your Book3:15 Feedback on the Childhood Voice5:43 Are You Starting in the Right Place7:15 The Importance of Beat Sheets18:15 Maintaining the MysteryResources Mentioned During This EpisodeSuzette Mullen InterviewThe Glass Castle by Jeannette WallsThis Boy’s Life by Tobias WolffAutobiography of a Face by Lucy GrealyThe Liar’s Club by Mary KarrLaila’s Bio: Laila found her most meaningful work as a teacher after pursuing a B.A. in English and an M.A. in Education from UC Berkeley. She’s currently writing a memoir about her chaotic, bicultural childhood that included a murder trial, misattributed paternity, an outing to exhume a dead relative, transatlantic smuggling, and a life-changing promise to a pig. She lives in Santa Cruz, California, and loves cave diving, close encounters with sharks, and dark espresso.Connect with LailaSubstack: https://lailacoryrall.substack.comSign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production

Send us a textThis week, you will hear from Laurie Riedman, a memoirist who wrote Diamonds in the Dirt: Stories from a Junkyard Girl, a collection of short pieces that mirror the fractured memories she built while growing up in a world filled with discarded car parts. During our conversation we talk about how to deal with the voice in your head that says what you’re writing isn’t true, and how trauma survivors can care for themselves while navigating the publishing process. Laurie’s Bio: Laurie Riedman is a personal and relationship coach, writer, and storyteller. After thirty-five years running her PR and marketing firm, she transitioned to coaching, founding b.u. coaching to support those—like her—who seek to embrace their truth and be their best selves in all aspects of their personal and professional lives. She publishes essays on her blog, More Than Words, and recently published her memoir Diamonds in the Dirt: Stories from a Junkyard Girl. She also co-edited Badass Sisterhood and Soul Shine (forthcoming) with Susan Walter. Resources Mentioned During This Episode:The Liar’s Club by Mary KarrEpisode Highlights1:58 Staying True to Your Vision5:34 Quieting the Voice of Doubt7:40 The Internal Struggles We Face10:00 Dealing with People’s Responses12:00 Owning Your Truth17:58 Publishing’s Impact on Trauma Survivors23:19 The Sandpaper DraftConnect with LaurieWebsite: www.laurieriedman.comMore Than Words blog: https://laurieriedman.substack.com/Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/coachingbuSign up for Revise Your Memoir series: https://bit.ly/4ooLTDi Connect with your host, Lisa:Get Your Free Copy of Ditch Your Inner Critic: https://lisacooperellison.com/subscribe/Website | Instagram | YouTube | Facebook | LinkedIn Produced by Espresso Podcast Production