

Mentally Flexible
Tom Parkes, LCSW
Join psychotherapist Tom Parkes as he has meaningful conversations to help you build mental flexibility. Each episode will explore topics related to psychology, mental health, and creativity. With an open mind and a sense of curiosity these conversations will help you better understand yourself, others, and the world around you.
Episodes
Mentioned books

Jul 25, 2025 • 53min
Dr. Robyn Walser | Presence and Authenticity in the Therapy Room
My guest today is Dr. Robyn Walser. Robyn is a clinical psychologist, educator, and author of several influential books on ACT for professionals and general readers. She is Assistant Clinical Professor at the University of California, Berkeley, and Director of Research at Bay Area Trauma Recovery Clinical Services. She is also on the staff of the National Center for PTSD at the VA Palo Alto Health Care System. Internationally known for her compassionate, client-centered approach, Dr. Walser has been working in the field of trauma and conducting the ACT training internationally since the 1990s.Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:The here and now unfolding of ACT in the therapy roomHow Robyn pays attention to function throughout a sessionUndermining therapist “rules”The potential downsides of bringing AI into the therapy processWe discuss Robyn’s new book You Are Not Your TraumaCreative ways Robyn helps therapists cultivate their practice—————————————————————————Robyn’s Website: https://robynwalser.com/—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

Jul 14, 2025 • 1h 3min
Noelle McWard Aquino, LCSW | Anxiety Unpacked
My guest today is Noelle McWard Aquino. Noelle is a Chicago-based therapist who specializes in the treatment of anxiety disorders. She is the author of Anxiety Unpacked: Discover Your Type and Recover Your Peace, a bestselling book that helps readers identify and work with the specific patterns driving their anxiety. Her work has been featured in publications including Psychology Today and Psychotherapy Networker. Noelle speaks regularly to both clinical and general audiences, training therapists in her framework for understanding anxiety and helping individuals develop more effective, compassionate responses to it. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:- How Noelle’s relationship with her son helped inform her new book- The biological processes involved in anxiety- The difference between anxiety and intuition- Recurring root patterns of anxiety- The role of values when navigating anxiety challenges- The pitfalls of control and unhelpful beliefs—————————————————————————Noelle’s Website: https://noellemcwardaquino.com/Anxiety Unpacked: https://a.co/d/dJ41mEK—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

Jun 20, 2025 • 1h 2min
Alissa Jerud, PhD | Emotion-Savvy Parenting
My guest today is Alissa Jerud, PhD. Alissa is a licensed clinical psychologist working in private practice and a clinical assistant professor at the University of Pennsylvania. In her private practice, Dr. Jerud specializes in exposure-based treatment of anxiety-related disorders and Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) skills training. She particularly enjoys helping other parents learn to accept, regulate, and tolerate their emotions, as well as their children's. Alissa is the author of a new book, Emotion-Savvy Parenting: A Shame-Free Guide to Navigating Emotional Storms and Deepening Connection.Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:What led Alissa into the field of psychology The inspiration for her new book, Emotion-Savvy ParentingScience-backed strategies for dealing with difficult emotionsA deeper dive on the skills of accepting, regulating, and tolerating How attempts to control our children can backfire The role of personal vulnerabilities in activating emotionsAnd we explore the different ingredients that go into our emotional experience—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

May 26, 2025 • 1h 2min
Holly Yates, LCMHC | Functional Analytic Psychotherapy (FAP)
My guest today is Holly Yates, LCMHC. Holly has been in private practice in North Carolina since 2004. Her specialty areas are working with adults both individually and in groups as well as couples addressing depression, anxiety, mood disorders and life stressors through clinical intervention and skills training. Holly's practice centers on third wave therapies most specifically Functional Analytic Psychotherapy (FAP) and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). She is a founding facilitator of the online ACT Peer Intervision Network sponsored through ACBS and a Certified FAP Trainer through University of Washington. Holly presents FAP and ACT workshops locally and around the world. Holly is Co-founder of North Wake Counseling Partners in Raleigh NC.Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:- Holly’s background with ACT and how it led to learning about FAP- The importance of the therapeutic relationship- Clinically relevant behaviors for connection building in the therapy room- The importance of encouraging authentic relationships outside of therapy- The courage and vulnerability involved in intentional self-disclosure- How ACT and FAP naturally blend together—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

Apr 18, 2025 • 54min
Dr. Joe Oliver | ACTivate Your Life
My guest today is Dr. Joe Oliver. Joe is a consultant clinical psychologist, author, and the founder of Contextual Consulting, a leading international training provider that has trained over 60,000 practitioners in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). He also serves as an associate professor and the programme director for the University College London’s postgraduate programme in CBT for Severe Mental Health Problems. Joe is an active member of the Association of Contextual Behavioral Science (ACBS) and a peer-reviewed ACT trainer He is also the author of six ACT books, including Acceptance and Commitment Therapy & Mindfulness for Psychosis and most recently, ACTivate Your Life. His extensive contributions to the field also include several textbooks, such as Acceptance and Commitment Coaching, ACT: 100 Key Points and Techniques, and The Mindfulness and Acceptance Workbook for Self-Esteem.Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:- How ACT first came into Joe’s life- His work on using ACT to support psychosis - Fusion to aspects of the self and identity- Relational frame theory and its early influences in childhood development- And Joe’s new book, ACTivate Your Life—————————————————————————Contextual Consulting: https://contextualconsulting.co.uk/ACTivate Your Life: https://contextualconsulting.co.uk/resources/activate-your-lifeJoe’s Youtube Channel: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCXyoggevWPfFjvhbYlM3x8A—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

Mar 30, 2025 • 54min
Pepper Stetler | One Mother’s Reckoning with the IQ Test
My guest today is Pepper Stetler. Pepper is the author of A Measure of Intelligence: One Mother’s Reckoning with the IQ Test, which we discuss in this episode. She is also a professor of art history at Miami University in Oxford, Ohio. She has written extensively on issues facing people with intellectual disabilities and their caregivers, in publications such as The New York Times, The Atlantic, and Slate. She lives in Oxford, Ohio.Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:What inspired Pepper to write this bookWhat Pepper learned through having a daughter with Down’s SyndromeUnhelpful assumptions about learning and intelligenceThe history of IQ testingThe relative recency of the concept “normal”Pepper’s vision for change—————————————————————————Pepper’s Website: https://www.pepperstetler.com/—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

Mar 2, 2025 • 60min
Dr. Emily Edlynn | Parenting with Nuance, Flexibility, and Compassion
My guest today is Dr. Emily Edlynn. Emily is a licensed clinical psychologist specializing in pediatric health psychology who works in private practice with children, teens, and adults. Emily spent almost ten years working in children’s hospitals before pivoting to private practice, which allowed her to start a writing career. Emily’s writing has appeared in the Washington Post, Parents, Scary Mommy, Good Housekeeping, Motherly, Psychology Today, and more. Her first book, Autonomy-Supportive Parenting: Reduce Parental Burnout and Raise Competent Confident Children earned an Indies Foreword award for a best book in 2023. She also writes about modern parenting in her Substack newsletter and co-hosts the popular Psychologists Off the Clock podcast. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:- Emily’s reflections on first becoming a parent - How misguided parenting advice inspired Emily’s writing- The importance of the repair process in relationships- The trap of overcorrecting from our childhood experiences- The value of being authentic as a parent- Autonomy-supportive parenting vs controlling parenting- And tapping into a child’s intrinsic motivation —————————————————————————Dr. Edlynn’s website: https://www.emilyedlynnphd.com/Autonomy Supportive Parenting: https://a.co/d/ja3ahmq—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

Feb 9, 2025 • 59min
Trevor Jones | Bringing the Heart of ACT into Performance
My guest today is Trevor Jones. Trevor is a Mental Performance Coach with the Aware Performance Group and has spent the last nine years studying and training in ACT and its underlying theories. A former professional golfer, he won a national championship and competed on the European Tour.Now, he works with high-performance clients across various domains, including golf, water polo, baseball, and stock market investing. He is currently co-authoring a book with sports psychiatrist Jorge Aguilar, MD, on one of sports’ biggest performance barriers—the yips—set for publication later this year.Trevor lives in the UK with his two sons and two dogs, where they enjoy climbing a mountain or three.Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:Trevor’s background with performance and ACT“Socially Transmitted Dogmas” in sportsThe “6 Breaths” experiential exerciseThe YipsSelf as context And The connection between pain and values—————————————————————————Aware Performance Group: https://www.awareperformancegroup.com/Trevor’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/trevorjones_aware/—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

Jan 12, 2025 • 53min
Lou Lasprugato, MFT | Yearnings and Vulnerabilities in Relationships
My guest today is Lou Lasprugato, MFT. Lou is an internationally recognized trainer and behavioral health provider. He’s a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, with private practices in both California and Virginia (United States), and Peer-Reviewed Trainer in Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) with the Association for Contextual Behavioral Science, for which he also serves as chair of the Training Committee. Lou has taught mindfulness meditation to health care practitioners and facilitated dozens of training events on ACT and Relational Frame Theory (RFT), as well as co-created courses on nutritional psychology and integrative mental health. Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:Reflections on parentingLou’s clinical background and how he first discovered ACTHow Lou uniquely applies ACT within couples workCore yearnings and vulnerabilities in intimate relationshipsHow these apply to the therapeutic relationshipAnd balancing the content and process levels in a therapy session—————————————————————————Lou’s website: https://www.loulasprugato.com/—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mentallyflexible/Check out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw

Dec 29, 2024 • 57min
Dr. Russ Harris | ACT: Misconceptions & Innovations
My guest today is Dr. Russ Harris. Russ is a world-renowned trainer of Acceptance & Commitment Therapy (ACT) and author of the international best-selling self-help book The Happiness Trap. Since 2005, Russ has run over 700 two-day workshops and provided ACT training for almost 50,000 health professionals. He has authored four ACT textbooks (ACT Made Simple, Trauma Focused ACT, Getting Unstuck in ACT, ACT Questions & Answers), and four ACT-based self-help books (The Happiness Trap, The Reality Slap, The Confidence Gap and ACT with Love). His best-known book, The Happiness Trap, has sold over one million copies worldwide, with translations into more than 30 languages.Some of the topics we explore in this episode include:- Perfectionism and productive procrastination- How the Hexaflex can potentially create unhelpful limitations in ACT- Broadening acceptance and defusion into emotional and cognitive flexibility - How all of the “B” in CBT fits nicely into ACT- “Flexible selfing” as an alternative to self-as-context - ACT supervision- And misunderstanding the difference between thoughts and thinking—————————————————————————Russ’s website: https://www.actmindfully.com.au/—————————————————————————Thank you all for checking out the episode! Here are some ways to help support Mentally Flexible:Sign up for PsychFlex through the Mentally Flexible link! PsychFlex.com/MentallyFlexibleYou can help cover some of the costs of running the podcast by donating a cup of coffee! www.buymeacoffee.com/mentallyflexiblePlease subscribe and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It only takes 30 seconds and plays an important role in being able to get new guests.https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mentally-flexible/id1539933988Follow the show on Instagram: instagram.com/tomparkeslcswCheck out my song “Glimpse at Truth” that you hear in the intro/outro of every episode: https://tomparkes.bandcamp.com/track/glimpse-at-truthCheck out my new album, Holding Space! https://open.spotify.com/album/0iOcjZQhmAhYtjjq3CTpwQ?si=nemiLnELTsGGExjfy8B6iw