Unfollowing Mum
Unfollowing Mum : Break Unhealthy habits and be the parent you wish you'd had is available for preorder NOW!A therapist recommended podcast for cycle breakers by someone who has lived the experience. Host Harriet Shearsmith knows first hand how challenging it can be to navigate estrangement, toxic family and dysfunctional dynamics in a digital age where setting boundaries and protecting your peace is harder than ever. In 2023 we’re unfollowing mum. We’re breaking the cycle, unsubscribing from the drama by healing generational trauma and putting ourselves and our mental health first. Each week I will answer your anonymous questions, discuss experiences and tackle the issues surrounding estrangement, generational trauma and navigating toxic families. Sometimes I’ll speak to experts, people with lived experience and other cycle breakers to share their point of view.You’re not alone, there is a community of people navigating parenthood without solid role models, learning to love themselves after emotional abuse whilst breaking the cycle for the future generations 💜 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Latest episodes
Jul 16, 2025 • 38min
Ep88 Summer holidays & IPT-AST to improve parenting skills
On this episode host Harriet Shearsmith talks about her experience of summer holidays growing up and how it differs from her parenting experience, she shares powerful insights from her book Unfollowing mum on Interpersonal psychotherapy - adolescent skills training (IPT-AST) and how we can use the programme to improve our communication with our children (and how we can reflect on where these skills were absent in our relationships with our parents)Harriet’s books:Unfollowing Mum: Break unhealthy patterns and be the parent you wish you’d had is available here: https://amzn.to/3FKHqdeCycle Breakers: Free yourself from emotionally immature parents and be the parent you wish you’d had (US edition): https://www.amazon.com/Cycle-Breakers-Yourself-Emotionally-Immature/dp/B0F1ZY9G8K/Visit harrietshearsmith.com for resources on estrangement and navigating family dysfunction or to submit a letter to the podcast. You can also book a session with Harriet here: https://app.simplymeet.me/harrietshearsmith Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 9, 2025 • 36min
Ep87 TW parental death after estrangement
On this episode, host Harriet Shearsmith shares a letter from 'Tanya' about parental suicide after estrangement, an enabling parent who haven't worked on their own trauma and continue to choose people who harm them and the impact affairs have on toxic family dynamics.Harriet’s books:Unfollowing Mum: Break unhealthy patterns and be the parent you wish you’d had is available here: https://amzn.to/3FKHqdeCycle Breakers: Free yourself from emotionally immature parents and be the parent you wish you’d had (US edition): https://www.amazon.com/Cycle-Breakers-Yourself-Emotionally-Immature/dp/B0F1ZY9G8K/Visit harrietshearsmith.com for resources on estrangement and navigating family dysfunction or to submit a letter to the podcast. You can also book a session with Harriet here: https://app.simplymeet.me/harrietshearsmith Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jul 2, 2025 • 55min
Ep86 The golden child with Lauren Smallcomb
On this episode of the show, host Harriet Shearsmith talks with author of Golden Child: My descent to scapegoat and rise to freedom and mind & body practitioner Lauren Smallcomb about her experiences as a former golden child and what it looks like to fall from the golden child perch.You can find Lauren at instagram.com/goldenchildbook or @flourish_therapy and find her book at flourishtherapy.kartra.com/page/goldenchildHarriet’s books:Unfollowing Mum: Break unhealthy patterns and be the parent you wish you’d had is available here: https://amzn.to/3FKHqdeCycle Breakers: Free yourself from emotionally immature parents and be the parent you wish you’d had (US edition): https://www.amazon.com/Cycle-Breakers-Yourself-Emotionally-Immature/dp/B0F1ZY9G8K/Visit harrietshearsmith.com for resources on estrangement and navigating family dysfunction or to submit a letter to the podcast. You can also book a session with Harriet here: https://app.simplymeet.me/harrietshearsmith Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 25, 2025 • 43min
Ep85 Breaking no contact after 4 years, harassment and toxic parents
On this episode, host Harriet Shearsmith shares a recent experience where she had to break no contact with her mother due to harassment, how she handled the situation and what it looks like to stay in a place of 'self' during these experiences.Harriet’s books:Unfollowing Mum: Break unhealthy patterns and be the parent you wish you’d had is available here: https://amzn.to/3FKHqdeCycle Breakers: Free yourself from emotionally immature parents and be the parent you wish you’d had (US edition): https://www.amazon.com/Cycle-Breakers-Yourself-Emotionally-Immature/dp/B0F1ZY9G8K/Visit harrietshearsmith.com for resources on estrangement and navigating family dysfunction or to submit a letter to the podcast. You can also book a session with Harriet here: https://app.simplymeet.me/harrietshearsmith Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jun 18, 2025 • 47min
Ep84 Being the scapegoat: the slow burn route to estrangement
On this episode, host Harriet Shearsmith reads out a letter from a listener, sharing their experience of growing up in a toxic family dynamic as the scapegoat and how that led to estrangement.Harriet’s books:Unfollowing Mum: Break unhealthy patterns and be the parent you wish you’d had is available here: https://amzn.to/3FKHqdeCycle Breakers: Free yourself from emotionally immature parents and be the parent you wish you’d had (US edition): https://www.amazon.com/Cycle-Breakers-Yourself-Emotionally-Immature/dp/B0F1ZY9G8K/Visit harrietshearsmith.com for resources on estrangement and navigating family dysfunction or to submit a letter to the podcast. You can also book a session with Harriet here: https://app.simplymeet.me/harrietshearsmith Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
9 snips
Jun 11, 2025 • 29min
EP83 Narcissistic, Emotionally immature & toxic - what is the difference?
Delve into the intriguing distinctions between narcissistic behavior and emotional immaturity in parents. Discover personal stories that highlight the complexities of family dynamics and the impact of toxic traits on relationships. Gain insights on navigating these challenges, fostering self-awareness, and setting boundaries. Explore the healing journey, which can be as daunting as climbing a mountain, yet emphasizes the possibility of genuine transformation with dedication. This engaging discussion encourages reflection and connection through shared experiences.
Mar 5, 2025 • 1h 2min
EP82 The "phone works both ways" dads
On this episode, host Harriet Shearsmith speaks with an anonymous guest regarding her experiences with parental alcoholism, a narcissistic and self centred father and toxic parent dynamics.You can find Harriet's book Unfollowing Mum: Break unhealthy patterns and be the parent you wish you'd had here: https://amzn.to/3Xdu12Y Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Feb 26, 2025 • 33min
EP81 "You remind me of my mum" :: Navigating familiar triggers
On this episode, host Harriet Shearsmith talks about the experience of being triggered - both memories that conversations with people will bring up, and what it is like to recognise your abusive parent's behaviours in someone else.You can find Harriet's book Unfollowing Mum: Break unhealthy patterns and be the parent you wish you'd had here: https://amzn.to/3Xdu12Y Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Feb 12, 2025 • 52min
EP80 *TW* Abusive step parents, enabling parents & the physiological effect of trauma
On this episode host Harriet Shearsmith chats with Diana, childhood sexual abuse and cancer survivor, about her experiences growing up in an abusive household and discovering the betrayal of her mum in adulthood. They discuss the physiological impact of trauma and Diana's views on her healing journey. For more from Diana, you can find her here:Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/diana__pearson__Tiktok: https://tiktok.com/diana__pearson Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Jan 29, 2025 • 36min
EP79 What happens when your narc parent is cheated on?
On this episode, host Harriet Shearsmith talks about her experience of growing up with a narcissistic parent who has been cheated on and how that unique dynamic can present in the parent/child relationship.You can get a copy of Harriet's book Unfollowing Mum: Break unhealthy patterns and be the parent you wanted here: https://amzn.to/42rOl3N Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
